6b4t - 6B4T

Finished 'femininity and domination' and i'm just gobsmacked. in a world full of propaganda about "reclaiming femininity", it feels like resistance to remember that femininity is not a harmless collection of traits and aesthetics but a politicized value system that demands the subordination of women. femininity not only demands women be subordinate but teaches them how to be subordinate and take pleasure in their subordination. and it makes power, real power, seem dull and abstract. it's an excellent mechanism for producing docile persons

this was something i intuitively understood at a young age and which was slowly eroded after a decade of "feminist" attempts to reclaim the value system that demands our subordination. gender was and still is about power

Summer vagina tips🍓

- staying in a wet bathing suit breeds bacteria causing vaginal infections. Change out of wet bottoms as soon as possible

- going to the beach or pool after hair removal such as waxing is a big no, You should do it a couple days prior.

- sleep naked! Let your vagina breath!

- tight shorts and bottoms will irritate your vagina and keep sweat in

- you are much more likely to get a vaginal infection in the summer so up your intake of probiotics and do everything you can to let your vagina breath.

- have a ph balancing bath

- wash your vagina with warm water and your fingers gently everyday

- thongs will spread bacteria from your anus to your vagina especially when you’re sweaty so try not to wear them.

- wearing no panties is super ideal but for some of us it’s just not realistic and you just feel too moist so wear COTTON panties

Have a good summer and get some sun in your coochie☀️

Reducing women to objects in pornography is a precondition to make the violence they endure look acceptable. When women stop being people, acts of violence against them stop being harmful, as objects cannot be harmed. The legitimation of VAW in pornography is also supported by two latent assumptions. First is the idea that pornography is a “distortion, reflection, projection, expression, fantasy, representation or symbol” (MacKinnon, 1984, p. 326) of reality and, therefore, not real. Yet, “fantasy expresses ideology” (MacKinnon, 1984, p. 327); it expresses the reality of the subordination of women entrenched in the way we understand sex, in and out of pornography. In fact, the second assumption that legitimizes VAW in pornography– that is, that “women enjoy sexual mistreatment” (Dines, 2010, p. 64), consent to their own humiliation, and never say “no” to degrading acts– shows how eroticization and women’s subordination are strictly connected, with the latter becoming “socially real” through its enactment in pornography (MacKinnon, 1984, p. 327). The illusion of consent covers the sexist nature of these acts and allows the refusal of sex not only to become indistinguishable from the desire of sex, but also normalized and eroticized. In pornography, even women’s “no” is part of the fantasy, and force is no longer seen as force “because it is inflicted on women and called sex” (MacKinnon, 1984, pp. 340–343). Under this pretense, almost everything becomes justifiable, including degrading and violent acts such as shoving a woman’s head down the toilet, gagging her, or making her ingest her own vomit. While women become powerless in pornography—as willing actors who ask to be acted upon—men become powerful and always obtain as much sex as they want, how they want it. For a short time, men “get to see what life would look like if only women unquestionably consented to men’s sexual demands” (Dines, 2010, p. 63).

— “I Don’t Hate All Women, Just Those Stuck-Up Bitches”: How Incels and Mainstream Pornography Speak the Same Extreme Language of Misogyny (Alessia Tranchese and Lisa Sugiura)

Not everything needs to be announced, do not put a target on your back.

With the rise in popularity of things like 6b4t, 4b, decenter men, etc I'm seeing a lot of women bragging to maIes about it which will not help us. At the end of the day maIes do not care about our happiness, look at how they get off on womens abuse, they constantly seek to break women down at every twist and turn, they dont actually give a fuck about whether single childfree women are the happiest demographic out there. Maturing as a single childfree woman is realising that it's not just about hating maIes but being indifferent to them, not caring about their opinions at all. Only recognise them for the threat & parasites they are. I dont care to prove maIes wrong. This doesn't mean I ignore or hold positive sentiments to them, I just focus on centering myself and womankind in my life instead. I often see women bring up points about single childfree women & our happiness to maIes when maIes already know that.

Let's assume that maIes dont know that women are happier when we're single, why does it matter that they know just how much happier women are when they're single? Given the way maIes have treated women, do you really think maIes give a fuck about women being happy? Do you really think that if maIes didnt know how single childfree women felt before & when they find out how happy single childfree women are they'd be pleased about it? Or that they'd care?

For every single childfree woman is a maIe without a rape maid, a maIe without someone to pummel their legacy through, etc yk how it goes. MaIes are already feeling the effects of our freedom & they're starting to retaliate. In south korea female only parking spaces were replaced with family spaces, in the USA there's project2025 & how they want to coerce women back into the nuclear family unit, in the UK many sexual offenders are being released from prisons due to "overcrowding".

Back to my point on indifference, part of that is realising that all of this shit goes beyond witty one liners on the internet. MaIes are fully aware of everything they do and how they benefit from it. To the women who brag to maIes about 4B et al, what is the end goal here? Is it truly decentering maIes as claimed or is it some type of strategy to spook maIes into being good boys? Because I've seen women try to be threatening with it like "maIes need to get their act together or we they wont be chosen/we'll 4B!" and this is still maIe centric in a way. Sounds harsh but many womens tiktoks, tweets, of this nature tend to have maIe partners or are still looking anyways so it only makes things harder for those actually serious about this. I feel like many women believe at some point maIes would grovel back to them & 'apologise' for their actions and start being better like no; maIes have intentionally done everything through force & violence including wanting a partner & children. MaIes arent going to change nor will ever change on their own. MaIes dont just want parters or children, they want this at the expense of womens lives; our goals, our dreams, and our humanity so they sure as shit dont care about our happiness.

There is thing as centering maIes even in a negative way, I saw it described as "chaotic misandrist" on the pinkpill site. Many women talk about how they want nothing to do with maIes but then make it their entire personality. Many women on tiktok are using 4B as some titillating leverage over maIes or as some divine femininity woo woo femme fatale shit. All of that still centers maIes. What needs to be realised is that it's not all about maIes. I dont solely do this as a "fuck you" to maIes, will it be? Yes. But that is not my primary reason for not dating or reproducing. Dont make this a thing where you solely want to get back at maIes. MaIes dont negotiate so attempting to barter is a waste of time and tiptoes on maIe apologism because even if maIes apologised for all the things they've done I would still not forgive them. I would still want the worst for them. Ik in that situation most women would forgive them without a second thought.

Women saying "act right or else 4B" are saying this because they still want to make it work with maIes. If there's negotiation it means a connection still wants to be formed which misses the entire fucking point. It aint about maIes it's about yourself and womankind. This is why it's hard for me to trust other women because it wont take much for them to cave as has been throughout history. I dont care what moids think about all this, as I said my primary concern regarding maIes is the threat they pose. I dont care whether they'd ever change. Anyone serious about this wouldn't be dangling the prospects of not partnering with them in maIes faces especially bc part of what leads to this is realising that maIes are dangerous & there's no reforming them. Dangling this in their face is poking the bear and maIes have no limits as to how low they'll stoop to get what they want. They'd kill themselves to prove a point.

So for the love of goddess, stop bragging to maIes about this. Doesnt matter if they say you'll be a miserable cat lady like bet. Deep down we all know they need us more than we need them. This isn't to say to hide & be ashamed of it, but it wont do women favours exposing our play to our predators.

Does Your Daughter Know It’s OK To Be Angry?

By Soraya Chemaly

May 9, 2016

Girls, taught to ignore their anger, become disassociated from themselves.

Anger is a recurring theme of the current presidential election. Every male presidential candidate has directly and overtly tapped into the very evident rage that the American public feels. They thump podiums, raise their voices, curse, and shout without being called divas, shrill, unhinged, ugly, or unlikeable. More power to them, literally.

Hillary Clinton, on the other hand, has a narrower path to tread when expressing or even responding to righteous anger. After decades in the public eye, Clinton, knows that she has to carefully manage overt displays of any strong feeling at all.

Most girls and women understand the risks they take when they become angry. No matter how justified, appearing angry won’t do her any favors and will actually undermine people’s perception of her competence and likeability. Studies show that when men are angry, people tend to lose their own confidence and defer to men’s opinions. When women are angry, the opposite happens. Studies also reveal that people will opt to work for angry-sounding aggressive men, but not with angry-sounding aggressive women.

The problem with studies that confirm what most women already know is that they may contribute to women policing themselves even more, and to parents teaching girls that being nice is better all the way around. That’s why seeing overtly and justifiably angry women who do not care that they may not be likeable to some people is so important.

According to the American Psychological Association, while both men and women feel anger, and shame related to anger, they show what they feel in different ways. For men, anger reinforces traditional gender expectations, for women it confounds them. That conflict by itself is a source of anxiety.

Girls are more likely to learn that their feelings of anger, no matter the reason they have them, are “wrong” and out of sync with their identities as girls. They are also more likely to intuit that to show anger puts their relationships at risk. Even worse, they associate anger with being unattractive in a social milieu where few things are portrayed as worse for a girl.

These messages start immediately. Ideas about anger in children are quickly infused with parental implicit biases and gender expectations. In one study, newborns were dressed in gender-neutral clothing and researchers misled adults about their sex. Parents were far more likely to describe the babies they thought were boys as upset or angry than the girls, who they categorized instead as nice and happy.

In general, starting when they are toddlers, boys in the United States are given more leeway in terms of being “out of control.” Parents and teachers expect girls to be able to control themselves more and hold them to higher standards, and so girls exhibit better self-regulation. Many parents not only think that boys can’t control themselves, but they unconsciously expect boys to be angry and girls to be sociable. When kids don’t adhere to these stereotypes, parents often respond, usually subconsciously, in ways that develop these traits accordingly. For girls, that means a whole lot of sublimation.

“Unspoken gender rules,” write Deborah Cox, Karin Bruckner, and Sally Stabb, authors of The Anger Advantage, “play into the diversion of women’s anger.”

Anger is diverted in women, who, as girls, lose even the awareness of their own anger as anger. Girls are taught, through politeness norms that suppress disruptive behavior, to use indirect methods of dealing with rage. For example, it’s “unladylike” to be loud, or “vulgar” to curse, yell, or seem unattractive. Adaptable girls find socially acceptable ways to internalize or channel their discomfort and ire, sometimes at great personal cost. Passive aggressive behavior, anxiety, and depression are common effects. Sarcasm, apathy, and meanness have all been linked to suppressed rage. Troublesome behaviors, such as lying, skipping school, bullying other people, even being socially awkward are often signs that a teenager is dealing with anger that they are unable to name as anger.

Girls, taught to ignore their anger, become disassociated from themselves.

Anger is so successfully sublimated that girls lose the ability to understand what it feels and looks like. Is her heart racing? Does she feel flushed or shaky? Does she clench her jaws at night? Is she breaking out in hives? Does she cry for no reason? Laugh inappropriately during difficult conversations? Fly off the handle over something that seems inconsequential? You can see where I’m going here…those crazy girl hormones, right? Better to just think of it as a phase.

For too many women, however, the phase never ends. It’s lives spent never expressing anger at all and believing that they don’t have the right or ability to do so without great risk.

Interestingly, the reasons men and women tend to get angry differ. A 15-year study of girls and women found that there are three primary causes of anger that are not the same in men: feelings of powerlessness, injustice, and other people’s irresponsibility.

By the time they are teenagers, many girls’ feelings of anger have been shunted into contorted shapes that no longer fit the standard (read male) ways that we think of and understand anger.

When most people think about anger management they think in terms of what can be seen: frustrated, foot-stomping people, most frequently portrayed as men, throwing things, maybe screaming or punching something. In 2004, researchers looking into gender and anger concluded that women’s complex management of anger “may not be accounted for by existing anger models.” In other words, using a male standard for understanding the problem meant, for many girls and women, simply not understanding the problem. Bottling up anger is as harmful, if not more so, than anger exhibited in violent outbursts. “Anger management” should also mean considering what can’t be seen, the kind of anger that women are more likely to experience. How we think of “anger management” should more broadly include teaching girls that it is OK to feel angry.

Few parents are considering these long-term effects when they unconsciously model or teach children lessons about politeness and how to be sociable. As they age, girls are effectively taught to put others needs first and are, indeed, rewarded for doing so, well into adulthood. The result, for many girls and women, long into old age, is a host of physical, psychological, and emotional damages. Anger impairs people’s immune systems, contributes to high blood pressure, heart damage, migraines, skin ailments, and chronic fatigue. Unresolved anger contributes to stress, tension, anxiety, depression, and excessive nervousness. It is now estimated that 30% of all teen girls have anxiety disorders.

Between the ages of 12 and 15, the number of girls who have depression triples, a rate three times that of same-age boys. Feelings of powerlessness and anger are also integral to the development of eating disorders. Suicide rates for girls between 10 and 14 tripled over the past 15 years.

Before puberty, boys and girls typically experience depression at the same frequency. “Social pressures” appear to be greater for girls and we’ve all been schooled on the impact of “hormones and emotions.” But girls aren’t just depressed when they are teens. They grow up to be more depressed in their 20s, 30s, 40s, and beyond.

Depression is complicated—part genetic, part hormonal, part environmental, part economic. Women who make less than their male peers, for example, are four times more likely to suffer from anxiety and 2.5 times more likely to suffer from depression. Imagine what would happen if they could get angry instead?

Clinicians believe that a large component of depression is anger and a specific type of anger caused by a perceived or actual loss or rejection. There are many reasons why girls might feel rejected, powerless, and angry.

First, they begin to see the effects of gender–based double standards that fly in the face of everything they’ve learned so far about their abilities, equality, and potential. Teenage girls feel the very real disparate impact of limitations on their physical freedom and behavior. Everyone seems to have policing opinions about their clothing and appearance, their movement and bodies.

Second, they become aware of physical vulnerability. Street and sexual harassment are common occurrences, including at school. They learn about sexual assault, if they have not already been assaulted (43% of assaults happen before the age of 18). They adapt to having to restrict themselves.

Third, they begin to encounter the cultural erasure of women, people who look like them and whom they are meant to emulate, as authoritative. The older girls get, the fewer women they see in positions of power and leadership. Boys and girls move from childhood realms where women are their primary caretakers, teachers, babysitters, neighborhood, and family adults to institutions where they are marginally represented as leaders. Role models are comparatively few and far between for girls who grow up gender code-switching in ways boys aren’t expected or, for the most part, allowed to. At the same time, the opposite is happening to boys whose confidence during the same period grows.

Fourth, they are navigating the stressful tension between managing their own sexuality and the crush of women’s pervasive sexual objectification. Adults around them often unhelpfully elide the two. School dress codes, for example, are the perfect example of how attempts to stop girls from “sexualizing themselves” handily do the trick for them.

While anger in girls and women is overwhelmingly portrayed as irrational, it is, in fact, completely rational. Girls learn to filter their existences through messages of powerlessness and cultural worthlessness. Girls might be more inclined to depression because coming to terms with your own cultural marginalization and irrelevance is depressing. Why isn’t this making you angry?

Girls need to know—and should be told explicitly—that it’s alright to feel anger. That it’s a healthy emotion that, as humans, they have the right to feel and express. It might not make them any friends, but that’s another topic entirely. It also doesn’t mean giving children, girls or boys, a pass for violent, disruptive, or entitled behavior. Understanding and managing anger can be part of larger childhood lessons about resilience, empathy, and compassion.

“Girls, taught to ignore their anger, become disassociated from themselves.”

— Soraya Chemaly, from Does Your Daughter Know It’s OK To Be Angry? (via wishbzne)

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*hits feminist blunt*: I don't wanna ever see any praise for a man or the male sex. "There are good men out there who work hard on being good." And I'm a law abiding citizen, where is my fucking national award?

We'll be talking about the right to live as free people EVERYWHERE and you're praising a man for thinking rape is wrong? The bar is below the earth's crust. Liberation for all my sisters, not praise to some man for doing the bare fucking minimum. Decenter men from your frameworks pls.

i know we cannot recount all the ways women have been feminists throughout history much less backtrack through centuries of badly recorded history to find when feminism "started" but i still was put off by this article putting a name and date to who "started feminism"

Don’t scroll past this. Kylie Armstrong was diagnosed with breast cancer and these small dimples were the only signs. She posted the image on Facebook so everyone knows that “that breast cancer is not always a detectable lump.” Here’s how Kylie is doing today.

(If you’re not sure how to do a self breast exam, instructions can be found at BreastCancer.org.)