Alienitz - Lord Of Palaye

*lunch break with my class*

girl: hey it's so funny how we all have a role in this class :))

girl: *pointing to a guy* you're like our new dad, showing us around :)

girl: *pointing to another girl* you're always in a good mood and trying to cheer us up :)

girl: *pointing to me* you're our personal depressed junkie :)

i just realized that this sounded creepy as if i was just standing there and staring at them or something 

but hum i’m actually friends with both of them so i basically have random conversations with them and at the same time my heart goes awwww these eyes and i lose focus

also i don’t think they know each other

that’s it

currently in a room with both my crushes and i think my heart's gonna stop or something

so much pressure but so much happiness at the same timeeeeee

my crush just sent me a very sweet and supportive voice message

i think it’s the healthiest crush i’ve ever had

am happy

someone please tell me why i thought it’d be a good idea to open my old emails from when i dumped that abusive jerk and he kept sending me emails telling me he’d show up at my place

spent the whole day thinking about him and how i'd text him and i thought i'd do it at like 2 or 3am since i usually get very emotional

but i don't wanna be too much

i don't think waking up to a 'i wish i could be with you rn' could be anything but stressful given the situation

i'm too much

there’s this kind of heavy sadness invading me for no reason and leaving me broken even when nothing’s wrong

things are doing ok but my heart feels heavy and i’m holding back tears but i have no idea why

me taking forever to reply to both my crush and the toxic person i hate

Brighter than ever

already cried 3 times in 2022, this year gonna be long as hell