I Drew This Back In October A Few Days After The Last Episode Of Season 5. It's Been A While But I Wanted

i really believe that discussing the character with someone who shares ur interpretation is the closest u can get to modern day philosophy. we are like plato and aristotle but talking about a fictional guys trauma

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when you finish a fic that was everything you could of hoped for and you click on their user to see that they’ve written dozens of fics for that pairing

idk if it's been explored yet how fyodor's ability opens up insane fyolai dynamics like i'm pretty sure fyolai shippers gotta be ready to have prime quality angst content for breakfast lunch and dinner but now you get a full on five star seven course meal 24/7, 365, made of bernadette animatics and tears of blood

like what do you MEAN his ability is to take over the person who finally kills him, stripping them of their will and freedom in the most visceral way possible, until they become his everything? what do you mean that knowingly killing him now would be, perhaps, the ultimate act of going against human instinct to so thoroughly give yourself and everything you are up to this person who can now use you in such a complete sense of the word?

shut UP and don't talk to me about the possibility of nikolai finding out or knowing about his ability and still wanting to bury a dagger into fyodor's heart - except maybe not, because he remembers the burst of the helicopter and tower, he remembers the still-warm limp hand clutched in his own, he wonders if that agony was humanity, there goes the one person, the one person-

and fyodor, would he hesitate at all? what's one more person after all these years of living on stolen time? or would he bleed at nikolai's hand and wonder even for a second if maybe it's time to let it all end, that his suit and hat and cards wouldn't suit fyodor anyway, that maybe those mismatched eyes might not be a sacrifice he's willing to pay

imagine the sheer devotion it would take to look him in the eye and kill him, killing yourself, the ultimate lovers' suicide really, dazai should be jealous, because here is a bond that can rival the stars, like a single free dove reviving a demon from the pits of hell, carrying him on white wings, because he is the only person who ever understood

imagine fyodor opening his eyes in that offered body and looking at his own hands and knowing they will never be clasped so happily again, no one to look at him without fear, no one bold or deranged or maybe just lovely enough to offer him a friendship bracelet with one hand and stab him with another

do you think nikolai would kill him, die for him, die with him, free himself from the world by becoming a vessel for a hell he loved. do you think fyodor would even care.

I drew this back in october a few days after the last episode of season 5. It's been a while but I wanted to post it anyway^^

+ close up

secret identities 🏳️‍🌈

[Sandbox] A piece I drew for Feb 2nd last year, I post it here now. Happy 2/2.

They’re narrative foils they might as well fuck nasty about it

"You… Expected me to betray you from the start?" "Look. At this point I just asume that everyone is going to betray us and I am just pleasently surprised when I am wrong."