Heyy!!! I Was Wondering Can You Write A One With Lewis C Black Reader Toto? Like Toto And Reader Are

You Shall Pay For It: Toto Wolff x Black!Caribbean!Reader

TW: Reader is 29 years old.

Working for MERCEDES AMG PETRONAS F1 TEAM always has its ups and down. There are days when the team does extremely well, and days when things go extremely south; it was how well they learnt and upgraded from their mistakes, that made the team as strong and dominant as it is today. The blood, sweat and tears from hard work and dedication that has given the wanted results.

Today is just like any other day in the paddock where drivers are getting ready for the race here in Singapore. The drivers are in their cars waiting for the green light. The race started and the drivers and defending and overtaking one another, fighting for the top position and hoping to get a pole while pushing each other to perform to the best of their abilities as always.

Unfortunately for George, he made a mistake that caused him to DNF close to the end of the race. The whole Mercedes garage was in shambles as they tried to console a disappointed Russell as they completely ignored the fact that Lewis had gained a pole, crossing the finish line in third place. The whole celebration went on, yet no one from the entire garage came out to congratulate him. The Ferrari and McLaren engineers realized his loneliness and decided to give him a hug. He went onto the podium and celebrated without any support from his team and seeing this caused Toto's wife to become livid at how he was treating his driver that literally made the team what it is today.

Walking into the garage, she stormed straight for Lewis. "Hey schatzi, how are y-" Toto cut himself off after his wife pushed him out the way. "Hi Lew, congratulations on your podium, I'm so happy for you! You did amazing out there!" Y/n cheered on the older man as she gave him a tight hug. "Thank you Mrs. Wolff, I did my best" Lewis blushed at the sudden admiration. "No worries here, you did just great for me and I appreciate it, unlike SOME PEOPLE!" Y/n emphasized as she stared down her husband. "As for you Mr. Wolff, weh di bumboclatt yuh feel like yaah do?! di man a work fi yuh fi how much years now and dis is how yuh treat him? yuh pussyclaat never deserve fi get nuh win den yuh dutty jankrow, move outta mi face man!" Y/n cursed in her native language walking off to the office and slamming the door, which had the whole paddock in silence since they had never heard her speak it before.

The rest of the day went by as no one spotted the previously angry woman until it was time for them to leave, she walked ahead of her husband as they came to a stop in front of the car. "Give me the keys" y/n demanded as Toto passed them over without question, thinking that she just wanted to be the one to drive; therefore was shocked to find that she entered the car and locked him out before starting the car and rolling down the window. "What are you doing leblieng, open the door?" he pleaded but it fell on deaf ears as she replied. "No, you embarrassed me today and you'll pay for it. You are not welcomed into the car and definitely not at home. You will find somewhere else to sleep that ISN'T a hotel or motel until you can apologize" before driving off and leaving him in the parking lot confused and basically homeless. The media had managed to get the footage and the entire F1 community is in chaos trying to figure out what he did wrong.

For a whole week, Toto had to be sleeping inside his office and using the shower in the change room to freshen up as he and other team members, including Lewis and George try to figure out what was to be corrected. Each day, Y/n would show up to the paddock and completely ignore her husband as she interacted with everyone but him, making him sad and almost in tears. "Schatzi, please tell me what I did wrong? I promise to fix it immediately, for whatever reason I've been wrong I'm sorry!" Toto wailed as he fell to his knees in the middle of the paddock where everyone could see the crying man who now looks like a child being scolded. Y/n looked down at the man she called her husband, contemplating before she decided to finally enlighten him. "You have been very wrong for what you did over the weekend. The way you treated Lewis was awful and I am expecting you to apologize. right here. right now." she said in all seriousness as the whole paddock watched on in shock.

"Lewis, I know I didn't congratulate you on your win and it may have seemed like I didn't care due to me addressing the issue with George, but I am really proud of you. you always do your best and aim for the highest and that makes me proud to be your team principal" Toto said, tears pouring down his face in shame that he did such act without realising. "I forgive you Toto, I know that you meant no harm and honestly I might have made the same mistake if I was in your shoes." Lewis responded as y/n motioned for Toto to stand.

Everyone went back to their regular job, of course cameras were still live as the married couple interacted for the first time. "Now you listen here Torger, both drivers are equal and should be treated as such. What happened was George's mistake therefore Lewis shouldn't have had to pay for it. the next time this happens, you will be added to the burial list, you understand me?" Y/n asked getting an immediate reply "yes ma'am. does this mean we are on good terms again? I really want to hug you and come home the end of the day?" Toto asked carefully not to piss her off again in case his punishment wasn't over. Surprisingly Y/n held her arms open for him to walk into, the couple embracing as the crowd awed and cheered at them, glad that Toto was finally in the clear.

Jude Bellingham x Black!Reader: HIDDEN LOVE

WARNING: Just letting you know that this is simply an imagine, no hate towards Ashlyn as I do admire her beauty as I think she's really beautiful.

Y/N POV

I sigh, getting out of the car and walking a few feet behind, blending in with the crowd as I watch them. My partner, Jude, holding hands with an Instagram influencer, Ashlyn Castro. Since he is out of the next two matches, he decides to come to the games. We all walk up into the VIP box, him and Ashlyn sitting together with his mother Denise who knows me as only a friend of his while I sit in the row behind, out of sight.

I sit and focus on the game, though distracted by the act in front of me. I watch from time to time as they hug, laugh and chatter together like an original family, Ashlyn filling my space perfectly, almost as if I never existed. His mother Denise, turns and smiles at me from time to time, speaking to me briefly before her attention is back on them.

I sit with a tightly perfected smile, willing the wetness in my eyes to go away. During the halftime, I stand up and excuse myself to the bathroom, and upon arrival lock myself into a stall and let the tears pool over. after a few minutes, I gather myself and retreat to my seat.

JUDE'S POV

Looking back at my partner, I see her eyes. The dark brown eyes like a calm tornado, look to be freshly wet and I immediately know why. It's not my fault, out of my control really, and I'm extremely glad that she understands. I skilfully reach my hand back and tug at my shirt as a signal to her. Feeling Y/N take the hint and hold onto my shirt, I briefly hold and squeeze her hand before fully focusing back on the game, my heart partially at ease.

After the game ends, I escort Ashlyn to the bathroom. " I enjoyed today, maybe we should make this an official, thing? we actually date?" I hear her say, I am about to respond when I spot my love looking on from a few metres away as she waits with my mother for our return. Her eyes no longer hiding the tsunami as I see the glossiness and her slightly trembling hands under her jacket. "Ashlyn, can we speak about this later" I say rather than ask and lead her to where the others are standing. "Please give us a moment" I say softly, pulling Y/N away from my mother and Ashlyn to a secluded corner.

Hugging her small form to my chest, I hear the muffled sobs in my chest and my heart breaks all over again. "I know honey, I'm sorry. I'm sorry love... I wish I didn't have to, but I've got no choice." I try to console her. "I'm not coming" I hear her mumble. "I'm not coming to the restaurant. I wanna go home." I sigh softly into her freshly silk pressed hair, completely understanding. "Thats okay, I'll have Ryan drive you home and I'll see you when I get back yeah?" I watch as she nods in agreement, and I wipe her teary eyes before having her look up at me. My 6'2 frame towering her as she stands at 5'2.

Y/N POV

Looking up at him, I stay still, allowing him to wipe the tears away from my eyes. "You know I love you, right?" he asks, and I can only nod my head yes. "Good, because I need you know and always remember that. No matter what happens, I will always be yours, I will always come home to you" he says softly. I sigh leaning into his chest for a minute until my head is lifted and our lips meet, reverent, unhurried, testimonial even as his emotions are poured into it.

Pulling back out of breath, I hug him for the last time, and we return to the spot. He explains that I will not be joining them for the dinner and that he'll meet them in the car as he then leads me to the Mercedes at the back. I enter the backseat and greet Ryan softly, giving Jude one last kiss, he closes the door, and Ryan drives off the home I share with Jude (that everyone thinks we're roommates).

Arriving home, I shower and eat something before laying down. a few hours go by, and I begin to scroll through social media, seeing all the comments about them at the match, luckily no one notices the bare stolen moments between us. Spotting one particular video, I contemplate whether or not to watch but press play anyways. seeing that it's a fan video which caught Jude with his hand over Ashlyn's shower, walking casually after dinner, I stop it and turn off my phone completely, deciding to get some rest.

JUDE'S POV

I arrive back home at 10. I quickly shower and pull on just a pair of boxers before getting into bed. I pull Y/N into me and strangely feel her stiffen for a moment. "Babe" I slightly shake her in case she is sleeping. I wait for few, yet I get no response, her body completely relaxed in slumber.

I take the moment to admire her, her pretty 4chair which is now 24 inches due to its silk pressed state, her cute nose which wiggles when she laughs, her pretty lips that speaks life into everyone and anything.

I feel myself drifting off to sleep, the replay of our memories bright behind my eyelids as I succumb to a well needed rest.

THE BETRAYER: Toto Wolff x Horner!Reader

Y/n dating the rival of her brother pissed him off to no end, and her marrying him made it worse. Y/n and Toto have been married for the past 4 years, which made it the worse years of Christian's life as he had to continuously watch his sister be all domestic and passionate with the man, he despised the most. All the hugging and small kisses and pecks in the paddock made his stomach sick and let's not forget the family dinners and other get togethers that now became a torture to attend.

Now the news trending all over the internet was that Y/n and Toto were expecting. Toto was in the middle of an interview answering a question, when an obviously pregnant Y/n walked out onto the patio behind Toto with their dog Hades following closely behind as she walked towards the garden once again out of sight. Toto obviously knew that she was seen and so he decided to address it. "Yes, you are seeing right. My wife is 6 months pregnant" he announced, sending the world off into excitement as loads of congratulations were being sent their way.

Christian just hearing of the news on his arrival to the paddock, fainted on the spot, scaring the journalists as he was transported to the medical room. Y/n had heard of her brother's state upon arrival and was immediately led to his garage where he was seated outside. "Chris are you okay? I heard that you passed out?" Y/n asked worriedly searching his skin for any signs of sickness. "Yes, I did, what were you thinking when you went and did this. Are you sure this is something you want to do?" Christian asked not knowing how to feel. "Yes Christian, I want this. And it's not like I can turn back now, I've gone too far" she said trying to reassure her brother that everything was fine.

After a while of talking, Christian somewhat began to accept the situation as Toto came to pick up his wife. "There you are Liebe, hi Christian, you wouldn't mind if I take her away?" he asked closely to being polite. "Sure, you can take her if you promise not to have another one of those rugrats that you're currently creating" Christian replied making everyone laugh at the banter between the in laws. everyone was finally making progress at the relationship evolved positively.

The Little Things: Lewis Hamilton x Black!Reader

Today had been a very stressful day for Lewis as he went through all the meetings and read over all the files that needed to be analysed, not only for formula 1 but also for The Hamilton Commission. He had been off in the office typing and signing away, not even breaking to get some food into his system and his wife Y/n knew that as she had been at home all day resting.

Y/n had recently given birth to a beautiful baby girl named Solay Hamilton who is now one week old. Lewis had brought home his new family just two days ago so everyone was still adjusting to the new addition. Y/n noticed that Lewis had been in the office for over five hours and that he obviously was hungry, so she left her sleeping infant and her four legged brother Roscoe in the nursery and went to make something in the kitchen. Once the food was ready she took it across to the door that had been shut since morning and knocked before entering.

Lewis looked up as he spotted his wife entering with a steaming plate of food and a beverage. “Hey sweetheart, are you and ‘lay alright?” He asked as she rested the plate in the desk before him. “Yeah we’re great, I just noticed you haven’t had anything since breakfast and so I made you some food. Please take a break from all this and get some nutrients and strength back into body. You can’t continue like this Lew” Y/n sighed as she knew how hard it is to convince her highly dedicated, driven and hardworking husband to take a break from anything he’s focused on. Sensing her worries, Lewis saved the work on his laptop before closing it and packing up the papers back into the folder before he drew the plate closer and started eating. He hummed in appreciation as the food did wonders on his taste buds and he thanked her politely.

After his meal, Lewis decided that he had done enough work for the day and so he locked up his office and made his way down the hall, coming to a stop right outside his daughter’s door. He quietly opened the door, finding his wife asleep on the low rock-able loveseat and his daughter asleep in her crib. He went over and lightly kissed his daughter’s forehead before he sat next to his wife, hugging her as he played with her curls.

“Hey, when did you get here?” Y/n asked silently as she woke up to find her husband next to her unexpectedly. “I had done enough work for today so I wanted to hang out with you both. You can go to the bedroom and sleep, I’ll stay here and watch over her” Lewis replied as he gave her a gentle squeeze and a kiss on the cheek before she left the room, bringing back complete silence.

Sitting down in front of the crib Lewis stretched his pinky finger rubbing along his baby’s hand who obviously, unconsciously took ahold of it making him smile. “Hey Solay, I don’t know if you’re hearing me or not, but either way I want you to know that I love you and your mummy very much. You both mean the world to me as you make me feel safe and secure. You are the biggest blessing and gift that I’ve ever received and I vow to cherish you as long as I live. You and your mummy encourage, inspire and motivate me to keep going so much to the point that I don’t even know what I was doing with my life before y’all. I want you to know that you are worth everything that this world has to offer and that I would never let anyone take away the light that reflects from you my shiny little star. I love you with all that I have within me and nothing will ever change.” He conversed with his sleeping infant, smiling at the fact that he had someone who appreciated him for who he was and no matter what life threw at him, he always had his two brightest stars to help him to keep going.

hey girl idk if your requests are still open but could I get more Fernando x black reader content? Maybe as a girl dad?🫢I love your writing sm and I hope you’re doing ok🫶🏾

Today was a very uneventful day for the Alonso family as there wasn’t anything for them to do. Y/n had left for work and surprisingly, Fernando didn’t have to leave for a race so he took up the responsibility of taking care of their daughter for the day.

Little Mila is only three years old, yet she was a lot of mischief as she ran around the house messing with powered substances which were seasonings from the cupboard in the kitchen, her excuse being that she was making potions similar to mommy’s. She had the pipe in the bathroom running and wetting the floors with all the splashing and liquid soap, Fernando almost slipping in it as he chased her down the stairs.

Fernando made a deal that he would get her something big from a store the next time he went to work if she behaved properly for the rest of the day. After a pinky promise, the deal was sealed and they went on to clean up the bathroom, sweep and wipe the house (Mila moving slower due to her size and strength), and wiping up the mess of seasoning in the kitchen before they made lunch to eat.

After having lunch, Mila suggested that they watched a movie, so ‘The Little Mermaid’ was picked. As the movie ended, Fernando realised that his daughter was no longer interested in the movie and so he invited her to help him workout.

Leaving from upstairs, Fernando took Mila into the gym as they warmed up on ground then on the treadmill before the brutal work began. Mila would lay on her dad’s back as “extra weight” to make it harder for him to do a push-up, would sit on his legs to keep them steady as he did a crunch, climb his back as he did pull ups and she even got the chance to do her own pull ups.

All of this hard work eventually led to a tired Mila who ran off saying she was going to use the bathroom yet she never returned. Seeing as Fernando’s workout was now finished and he realised his daughter had been gone for too long while the house was extremely quiet, he rushed up to look for the toddler, finding her asleep on the couch.

Smiling at the sight, Fernando took a picture of the moment; sending it to his wife before lifting his daughter up to her room and laying her softly under the sheets. Kissing her forehead, he quietly exited the room- leaving the door ajar as he made his way to start on dinner before she wakes up to start creating havoc once again.

Carlos Sainz x Black!Reader: ReFound 2

The preparations for baby Sainz had been made and today was the day he decided to meet his parents. Y/n had been living with Carlos and Rebbeca for the past one month, wanting her to be close and that came in handy as her water broke this morning.

Carlos held her up as they slowly walked around to get her dilated while they waited for the midwife. Carlos Sr and Reyes went about setting up the bedroom where Y/n would give birth as Ana and Blanca made her a fruit bowl to keep some energy.

When the mid wife arrived and checked her over while Y/n complained of something sliding down to her opening, it was noted that she had been fully dilated and the baby's head was in her birth canal.

Y/n spent the next 5 hours alone in the bedroom with Carlos as she was moving all over the place, mostly in a squat trying to push. Carlos held her throughout the whole process, whispering encouraging words to her as they rocked while she beared down deep, finally getting their baby's head out. Carlos was so amazed as he kept rubbing the head that was obviously full of jet black hair.

After a few more minutes of rest they went back to the routine of pushing with the contractions and breaking when it stopped as they were instructed and with a few more pushes, the little Sainz slid right out into the palms of his father's hand with a healthy cried that was heard from the outside of the room where everyone else waited to give them privacy.

After an extra hour alone with their newborn, Carlos placed Y/n on the bed to rest as went out with their son to be introduced to his family. As soon as the new human was in sight everyone started gushing at how cute he was, yet no one was allowed to hold him due to the rule imposed that he would not be held by anyone but his parents until he was at least 4 months old.

"What are you both gonna name him?" Rebbeca asked quietly as she looked down at the infant in his daddy's arms. "We're not sure yet, I'm waiting for her to wake up and then we'll decide" Carlos responded not looking up from his baby. As I'd on cue, Y/n started shifting before her eyes fluttered open.

"Careio?" Y/n blindly patted the space next to her, finding it empty as she jumped up. "Hermosa, he's here no worries" Carlos gently pulled her back to the bed, placing their son into her hands. "My son" Y/n cried as she looked at her baby who fluttered his eyes open at the sound of his mommy's voice. "That's what we're naming him?" Carlos asked her causing her nod shyly, Rebbeca giggling at her cuteness as they all hugged, confirming the little Sainz's name.

Lewis is constantly checking his phone, waiting for a message or call from you, or taking and sending photos for you. Can you write something where everyone around you is aware that Lewis has a different mood than usual, but they don't understand what it is or they can't find out who that person is? I hope it's clear 💜 have a nice dayy

Who Is She?: Lewis Hamilton x Black!Reader

Everyone knew how unfocused Lewis was when it came to relationships. Before now he had taken a break from that part of life and had become a bit distant from a lot of things and people to focus on himself as he said, but what if that wasn’t the full truth?

These days, Lewis could be spotted always typing away on his phone, the AirPods are no longer in use for music, he is always in a way more positive mode than usual as he just overall looked extremely happy it almost hurts.

Toto, Bono, Angela, Susie and George watched on as the Mercedes driver smiled every time he read a message, replying quickly before waiting impatiently for a reply from the person involved in the conversation from the other side.

He was as giddy as a high school boy who finally got recognised by his crush and they were enjoying the view. At first they had no idea what was going on and so it wasn’t until George had secretly overseen Lewis receive a message one day that it was cleared. From the understanding of George the name of the girl was Y/n and that was all they know.

Today was the same with Lewis walking around grinning widely as he typed away at his phone while everyone watched on with smiles and smirks at his behaviour. Angela and Susie however we’re very impatient and wanted to find out about the girl in all seriousness so they grabbed him by the shirt and had him sit in the centre of the garage as all eyes were now on him for the interrogation has begun.

“So Lewis, it’s been a couple of weeks that we’ve been noticing your mood change. Not that we don like it, it’s just that we are concerned about what exactly you got yourself into. Now tell us, we already know it’s a girl no need to hide. We want the details sweetheart” Angela urged him softly. “Well…her name is Y/n L/n…she’s 26 years old…she’s a lawyer and real estate agent…I had been speaking to her for a couple of days before she gave me her number and now we’re dating” Lewis blushed as his team awed at his confession. “That is so sweet Lewis. We can see that she really has you locked in, BUT is there any chance that we’ll see her in the paddock?” Bono asked eager for the response. “I was thinking about inviting her to the next race”Lewis replied making the garage irrupt in cheers as they begged him to make the call now.

The phone rang once, twice then a third time before it was answered “Hey Lew” Y/n greeted making the garage awe at the cute nickname. “Hey Y/n/n I always wondering. Since you mentioned that you work from home, I was wondering if there was maybe a chance that I could fly you out for the next race, that’s if you’re interested?” Lewis asked nervously as the line went silent for a while after. “Umm… yeah, sure I’ll be able to come over as long as you send me the information at least least two days before so I can prepare” Y/n answered and everyone was feeling excited at this point waiting for the call to end.

“Ok sweetie, that’s all I wanted to confirm with you, thanks and have a good day yeah?”he nervously said as she replied “No problem, thank you and make sure that you have a good day and don’t go stressing your teammate and team principal out ok? Bye bye” as the phone hung up everyone erupted into applause and cheers as they now had a guest to prepare for leaving a shyly blushing Lewis to go hide away in his drivers room until he was next needed.

“It’s Our Birthday Schatzi” Toto Wolff x Black!Caribbean!Reader

NOTE: This is for my bestie @omgsuperstarg who shares a birthday with our Team Principal, Toto Wolf. Happy birthday sweet girl!!

The day that everyone had been waiting for has finally arrived. Lewis’ birthday was celebrated a couple of days before; therefore the entire paddock was still on a high waiting for the Mercedes team principal and his partner’s celebration.

Walking into the house, the eruption of cheers and confetti's popping, startled the couple as they jumped back in surprise. “Happy Birthday!!” The team screamed, Lewis and George running up and spraying them in champagne, leaving them drenched. The music started and screams echoed through the house as everyone pulled a partner to the dance floor.

Throughout the night, food was being ate, dance battles going for rounds, conversation flowing, and drunken devotions made, and various pictures taken,the night was seen to be well spent.

The night coming to an end with the final dance, starring the birthday lady and gentleman. The song started off as everyone gathered around. “It’s our birthday schatzi” Toto whispered silently for her ears only. “I know old guy, let’s enjoy the time” his partner joked in response. “I want to, but I’m scared that Lewis will put on a song that I don't have the rhythm for” he stressed, visibly tensing.

Just as predicted, Lewis switched the song to a more intimate and soul combining song named ‘Tender’ by Patrice Robert as this made Toto's heart leap. “Just follow my lead using your hips as you feel my movements and follow along” she whispered softly to his ears as he slowly relaxed, paying close attention to the beat.

Stabilising himself, Toto made the effort to move along in meeting her at each whine and dip, synchronising into the perfect Caribbean dance routine to the Haitian song as the crowd around them cheered and screamed whenever he would perfectly execute a move.

As the song came to an end, everyone clapped, chanting for the couple to kiss. “C’mon, don’t ruin your party old man, just kiss the girl!!" Lewis shouted over the mic as Toto pulled his wife into a passionate, earthshaking kiss.

The party finally came to an end as everyone once again wished the birthday couple a happy birthday on their way through the exit. Almost two hours later, the house was finally cleaned, both Toto and his wife showered; now cuddled up in bed as they wished each other a happy birthday before falling out in a deep slumber.

A Weekend With The Kids: Lewis Hamilton x Black!OC

Today, Lewis was about to leave for the race weekend where he had less responsibilities in the paddock and so he decided to take the kids with him in order to give Y/n a break so she could have some self care for weekend.

“Lew are you sure you’ll be able to handle both of them at once?” Y/n asked her husband looked sure of his decision. “Yes honey, I’m sure. I don’t have much to do so I’ll be able to watch them properly and spend some alone time with them after, while you stay home and relax, alright?” He answered smartly. “Alright, just don’t say I didn’t warn you Mr. Got It Covered” Y/n retorted. Lewis loaded everything into the car and they all said their goodbyes before driving off, making a quick stop to pick up Angela and heading straight to the airport for takeoff.

It was now Friday and the first trouble came when Lewis’ first born, Leah Hamilton, wouldn’t go at leat five minutes without a hug or a kiss. She would put up fights, even going as far as pausing his interviews which the fans found to be adorable.

Then came his second child, Lucas Hamilton, who was causing havoc as he went around pranking his uncles (Toto, Fernando, Sebastian and Sergio) where is consistently caused mini heart attacks leaving the men paranoid of walking around; however he made it even worse as he kept hiding every time he knew that Lewis was looking for him.

Throughout the rest of the weekend, the Hamilton kids could be seen dragging their 7x World Champion of a father from one end of the paddock to the next with no breaks in between. This went on until Lewis found himself childless on multiple occasions, leaving everyone around in panic searching for the little tots.

The weekend had finally come to an end when Lewis got off the flight and drove back home unpacking everything while reflecting at the thought that his wife was right all along; it wasn’t easy looking after two active children on your own and for that he admired her even more.

You’re at Lewis’s place, just laying down on the bed watching a movie when he receives a call. "Who is it?" I asked. He looked at who it was, letting out a frustrated sigh. Then he smiled and tried to brush it off. “No one important.” He lied. "Answer it" I demanded as he tried to hang it up.

He couldn’t help but swallow thickly at my demands as he answered it and put it on speaker mode. “Hello?” He answered. Hearing a woman answering from the other side wasn't a shock until she told him that she was looking forward to another session with his dick.

His eyes widen as his heart drops when he heard her say that. He felt embarrassed when I heard that as he quickly put it on mute “It’s no one important I swear” he said nervously, trying to get out the situation. Narrowing my eyes at him, I then heard the woman go on about how she wanted to have his children in the future after our divorce, I jumped up and went into the bathroom, locking the door. He told her about my miscarriage and fertility issues my mind screamed.

His face expression went from nervous to complete fear seeing your reaction as it made his heart sink. He immediately tried to get up and followed me to the bathroom, knocking on the door, “Baby please open the door!” he pleaded. "No" I said very calmly as to not explode. Lewis tried to open the door but it wouldn’t budge. “Please just let me explain!” he tried to persuade as he continued to knock, his heart beating loudly by each thump. "Lewis I'm begging you please find another room to be in" I said as my voice raised a couple of octaves.

Lewis could hear from my voice that I was trying so hard not to explode right then and there. He took a deep breath and sat down right in front of the bathroom door. “Please just let me in and listen to me. I’ll explain everything please” he said. "Taking a deep breath, I told him to speak. He felt a wave of momentary relief as he heard my voice, indicating that I might be calmer. He leaned his back against the door and began speaking. “It was a one time thing and it only happened that one night at the party. I was very drunk that’s all-"

"That is no fucking excuse!" I yelled as I took up the container on the sink throwing it into the mirror and breaking it. Lewis heard the sound of glass shattering inside making him flinch. He felt his heart break when he heard that, feeling how upset I sounded. “I know it’s not an excuse but please just understand. I did it that one time… and I regret it so much so please just open the door” he said with sorrow in his voice. "If you only did it once then why does she have your number, why is it that she can call and be so comfortable with saying such lewd remarks!" I questioned as I pulled the bathroom apart breaking everything in my way, cutting and injuring myself in the process. His heart dropped even more as he began to hear glass shattering and things breaking. He immediately got up again and began to bang on the door harder. “Please stop! Please stop it!” he yelled desperately, fear in his voice as tears began to form in his eyes. His voice sounded panicked, “Don’t hurt yourself. Please just open the door, I’m sorry just don’t do this to yourself”.

"It's too late to beg Lewis, why would you do this to me?!" I screamed throwing the glass vase into the glass shower door, splinters flying and piercing my skin all over as I screamed. "You knew of my fertility issues and went to tell her!" I wailed in disbelief that my husband would hurt me this deeply. Lewis slammed his fists against the door in frustration and panic, feeling completely helpless. Tears streamed down his face as he yelled back, “I wasn’t thinking, okay?! I was wasted and I was stupid!” He paused for a moment, taking in a shuddering breath as he imagined the damage you were doing to yourself, “Please… I regret it. I regret it so much. Please open the door”.

"What if I just ended it all right here? That would feel so good" I spoke to myself even though my husband heard every word. Lewis’s body froze as he heard those words. A new wave of panic took over as he yelled my name out, banging on the door harder. “No, no please no! Please don’t say things like that. Please don’t do anything. I’ll do anything, please just open the door!” Walking on the broken glass that pierced my feet with each step, I went into the drawer taking out the gun that was kept there for protection and took off the safety which echoed in the through the door. Feeling his heart stop and his blood run cold, Lewis began to panic even more. He could only helplessly hear what was happening on the other side of the door as he slammed his body against it multiple times. “No please don’t do this. Please don’t do it please! Please open the door!” he was yelling and pleading as tears streamed down his face uncontrollably.

Fighting with all his might, Lewis managed to kick the door in, flicking the gun from my hand and grabbing out the bathroom as I wailed in his arms due to his hands being in my open wounds. Placing me on the bed and carefully holding me down as to not touch the wounds I wailed until my voice was almost gone and I was in a state of drowsiness yet still heartbroken as I cried softly. "Why...just why? Wasn't I good enough of a wife for you?" I asked sadly as I sobbed into his shirtless chest. Lewis’s heart broke even more as he heard you sob. His heart ached seeing you like this. He gently moved his hands from pinning down your wrists to holding them and intertwining his fingers with yours. “Of course you were. You are an amazing wife, the best wife in the world. I don’t deserve you. I don’t know why I did something so stupid. I can’t find an excuse. I’m so sorry” he said in a defeated tone, feeling ashamed for hurting you.

"Why didn't you just let me die, it would take away the shame and hurt and disappointment from both of us" I cried. Seeing you beg for such a thing shattered his heart even more. He shook his head, holding you tighter as he spoke with a shaky voice. “No. Please don’t say that. You can’t leave me. I can’t lose you. I’ll do anything to fix this so please don’t say things like that” he pleaded with me, not able to bear the thought of me dying so young. "I don't think it's fixable. Even if it is, how do we fix this. I've had the pain for so long and it got deeper with each year that I remained unsuccessful of giving you a child, you just pushed the knife right through down to the bottom" I sniffed while looking into his eyes that held so much love for me even after what he did.

His heart sank hearing all that. The guilt and shame he felt grew even more, knowing the pain I was going through. He felt complete remorse for his actions and the damage he caused. He leaned down, gently nuzzling his head beside mine, holding me tight as he spoke with a voice filled with remorse. "We can figure out a way to fix this. I don’t want to lose you. I never want to lose you. You’re the most important person in the world to me. I’ll do anything to make things right again”.

Too exhausted from the rage, I started to fall asleep as I felt Lewis exit the room. He then later returned with a first aid kit as he cleaned and bandaged each would, placing a kiss over each one he finished while I succumbed to sleep wondering how did my marriage turn out to be a shitshow.