I literally cannot overstate how important creative hobbies are when dealing with mental illness. If you can’t draw, there are coloring books. If you can’t write a novel, you can write in short journaling bursts. If you can’t sing in the shower, you can listen to music. Sometimes with mental illness it feels like we have this dark presence inside of us that is bumping around in our brain and organs, causing problems. It helps immensely to let it out.
Some rando: You should think about stopping your prescription
Me: My pills make me not want to die tho
They: You shouldn’t want to die, that’s not normal
Me: Yeah that’s why I’m taking my pills
ive been wanting to take a swing at making this kind of thing for ages, and since im manic I figured i’d do it!
color explanation under the cut
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I have trouble taking care of my teeth because everything that involves doing that is a sensory nightmare. I decide to do some research to see if there's anything I can do about this. The results?
"How to make your autistic child brush their teeth"
"Autistic Children and Sensory issues relating to tooth brushing"
"How to get your little shit to brush his fucking teeth"
Like, yeah Google, thanks, that really helps. And like, even if I was a child, some of the advice seemed... unhelpful. Like, doing a dance and singing a song while brushing your teeth? Even for a kid, I don't think that would help distract from a sensory experience as intense as brushing your teeth. Like, the extremely intense and unpleasant flavor, the intense feeling of the brush against your teeth scraping across it, even mouthwash has such an intense and disgusting flavor that I have difficulty keeping it in my mouth for more than a few seconds. I wish there was SOMETHING that could be done.
Displaying “scary” symptoms of mental illness
Being diagnosed with multiple disorders
Having one or various personality disorders
Being diagnosed with NPD, BPD, or ASPD
Having very low empathy, or no empathy
Having symptoms that cause anger, emptiness, or paranoia
Having triggers or “strange” personal boundaries
Needing extra help or accommodations
Having intrusive thoughts about upsetting or scary topics
THIS IS NOT GOING TO APPLY TO EVERYONE!!! this is my own personal experience. mental illness isn't a one size fits all, i'm not claiming to be an expert or know what everyone's mania feels like, this is just what i've experienced
increased irritability
increased energy
change in appetite, not feeling hungry for days and then becoming ravenous
frequent sensory overload
oversensitivity
changes in sleep pattern, sleeping only 3-4 hours or shifting to sleeping more during the day and being awake all night
noticeable increase in productivity, that might start out as good, but you notice yourself being hyper fixated and jumping from several different projects
increase in impulsivity
feeling like you've lost control over yourself and your actions
paranoia
intrusive thoughts
nightmares
talking a lot, rambling, going on long rants
a feeling like you're watching yourself on a screen, like someone else took over your body and you're watching from the outside as they live your life
being aware you're making bad choices or that you are being reckless but not caring or being able to stop
dissociation
impulse purchases and reckless spending
reckless driving
impulse to change appearance or alter your image that can feel like a NEED if it isn't done immediately (for me this manifests in my hair, like cutting it or changing the color at 3 am. it also used to be comorbid with my eating disorder, which led to extreme fasting to try and lose weight)
feeling like you can accomplish things you couldn't normally do, feeling powerful, inflated ego and sense of self. i sometimes would think i was invincible and that nothing could hurt me and tried to act on it to prove it
increase in libido
risky sexual behavior
heightened emotions, everything feels larger than life, the highs feel like they'll never end and the lows feel like the end of the world
for myself this was only in extreme cases, but visual or auditory hallucinations. i've only had visual hallucinations a couple times, but when things got really bad, i would hear things that weren't there, or hear people calling me when i was all alone
feeling like thoughts are racing and you can't stop them, feeling like everything is loud and you're being pulled in a million directions
friends and family noticing uncharacteristic behavior, cutting people off, becoming VERY irritable, or showing too much affection in a way that isn't normal for you
and, inevitably, when it ends: The Big Crash. the depressive episode after that knocks you out
Reminder: Spring is coming so take the time now to update your mania crisis plan