Writing Notes & References

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Before I Read A court of silver flames everybody told me how romantic it was and how Cassian is this great mate and how much he loves Nesta but all I Read in his pov was how he lusts after her. Always talking about her body BUT NOT HER AS A PERSON! WHERE IS THE LOVE?!

Im back

Lol hey yall. This semester was crazy, but I finished my finals and all I gotta do is walk the stage. Since I have yet to find a job I have PLENTY of time. Ive read one or two books over the time I've been gone.

The silent patient.

If we were villains.

I got onyx storm (havent read yet bc xaden and violet were so insufferable in iron flame that I got put off but it will be read.)

And I'm halfway through The Poppy War.

Oh, and I finished Sunrise on the reaping.

Once I get my bearings, aka my personal library and reading lists, I'll start back doing my reviews but I'm kind of conflicted on HOW id like to continue.

Do we like the two parts where it's the characters then the plot separately, or should I make it just one long post???? Like, how are we feeling about this. I don't have a lot of followers here but I'm hoping for some feedback to make reading these thoughts and reviews better for yall so just LMK!

Also, should I review ACOTAR? It's been a few years since I've even touched the series, and I'd need to re-read it to get all of my thoughts out but is that something yall would want my yaps on?

There are so many books I have read that I wanted to talk about, but I'd have to go back and re-read bc id rather it be fresh on the mind. But anyways.

I say all this to say I'm back and I'm gonna try to put myself on a schedule to post reviews. I'll do random posts in between, but the main events ill try to put on a bi-weekly schedule depending on what life throws at me. So be on the lookout!

god i love feyre and rhysand slander

alot of ppl forgive or not blame feyre much for how nesta has been treated bc feyre is naive or young or “doesn’t know any better” when its not an excuse,,

she is the high lady of night court for 2 to 3? years, a politician, idc if she doesnt do shit or it hasnt been that long for her to study. look not just bc she has been through it herself! but she should be able to tell the simple difference between right or wrong

ffs she is a mother now, some basic thinking would do her good or will she let rhysand decide what to do in any decisions about their child?

she already forgive him so quickly for keeping the fact she was going to die from her and beloved her family didnt tell her either -no angry towards them but god forbid nesta doesn’t just move on from her ptsd from being turned into a fae, the war and death of their father, god forbid nesta likes hanging out in bars -remember how feyre was judging nesta hanging out at such a place? what a loving high lady she is

nesta spending feysand’s money -which should have been given to her for all she went through thanks to them and her own work- is an issue bc its embarrassing to feyre even though they own the entire court, boast about all the money and things such as numerous houses they own and are fucking rich as hell

feyre cried about it, fine she was pregnant but pregnant women cant think clearly?

lets go back to rhysand keeping info about feyre pregnancy from her, after nesta reveals the truth she is taken on the hike bc “rhysand will kill her” but does not once feyre asks to see her own sister the only one who told her the truth? she cant look at her mate’s face and know he wants to hurt her sister?

feyre has always prioritised being to be there her mate then her new family over nesta and expects nesta to happily take part in that new family

ngl feyre was naive in how she talked about her and her sisters’ life at the cabin bc she was gone hunting most of the day & didnt seem to pay attention to anything bc who took care of the house work? nor seems to remember much about their childhood before they lost money so she naively painted a bad picture of nesta to inner circle, “the older sister who let her younger sister go out and hunt”

the fact that these 500yrs old do not take into account that feyre is young and might have missed something or not have been aware of other things and choose to judge nesta on feyre’s words omg

look nobody forced feyre to go hunt but inner circle acts as if thats what happened

who was doing other work around the house? elain? all she had was her gardens

but feyre is not naive is how after years of being a fae she still sees it like that, when rhysand brings it up she doesnt rebuke it, only “shes my sister and i’ll handle her” like nesta is a property

mind you nesta’s human life was ripped away from her and went through trauma after trauma bc feyre the genius involved them into it

nesta knew feyre was not at their aunts, nesta went to the wall for feyre, nesta put aside her own trauma from the cauldron and took care of elain, nesta stood tall and talked to high lords to beron and made him and them listen, nesta trusted feyre throughout the war, nesta helped in the war, saved cassian’s life, help kill the hybern king but she hasnt done enough to make amends for letting feyre hunt?

feyre does not stand up for nesta at dinners, against her new bestie mor’s judgemental comments and cassian’s harassing or her own mate shitty treatment of her sister. feyre lets this go on, laughs or writes them off as jokes

feyre forces nesta to comes to solstice party to be around her family so she can be ignored and feel unwelcomed for hours and then feyre has the audacity to be hurt bc nesta came cause of rent money that feyre had forced her on to

mind you feyre painted their loser of a father and hanged his picture but not nesta but feyre wants nesta to be a part of her family🥺 oh poor her feelings

did feyre ask nesta if she wants to be a part of feyre new family?

did feyre ask if nesta is okay without her mate and new family lingering around?

did feyre listen to nesta when she said no to coming to solstice party?

did feyre listen to nesta when she repeatedly has made it clear she does not want to be around cassian?

did feyre listen to nesta?

does feyre see nesta as her own being?

does feyre care about nesta?

no bc feyre does what she wants, bc feyre will get what she wants

she isnt stupid, she knows rhysand her beloved mate who climaxes at the image of their unborn son will make it happen for her

she shipped nesta and cassian since their first meeting like she has been shipping elain and azriel, so for feyre she wants them to be together. yeah she wants that for cassian but she doesnt want it for nesta or else she would have not had nesta locked up in a house with him

feyre is entitled and has a superiority issue (like rest of inner circle) towards nesta and has helped in drive nesta to her breaking point and locked the door to nesta’s cage

but nesta must apologise to feyre for hurting her feelings🥺

fuck off

feyre is to nesta what tamlin is to feyre

feyre being naive is not an excuse anymore, feyre being uneducated is not an excuse anymore, feyre not knowing better is not an excuse anymore

feyre simply doesnt care to do better

The way Nesta would decimate Feyre in a fight🙆🏻‍♀️

“Do you blame Shakespeare for any of it?” The question is so unlikely, so nonsensical coming from such a sensible man, that I can’t suppress a smile. “I blame him for all of it.” ― M.L. Rio, If We Were Villains (2017)

Forgive me, for all the things I did but mostly for the ones I did not. ― Donna Tartt, The Secret History (1992)

Cassian meant it when he said everyone fucking hates her. That didn’t just pop into his head in the heat of the moment. When he said he felt shackled to her. When he took her on a hike until she passed out. Every single time he used her for sex. Every single time he defended Rhys when nesta needed his support. Every single time he waxed poetic about the good qualities he sees in Mor and Feyre and bemoaned the terrible qualities he sees in nesta. Every single day nesta was locked in that house, he hated her. Laughed at her struggling. Starved her of every good thing she’d ever said she wanted. He hated her through it all.

This was a book written by a woman, against women. The dichotomy between good and bad is irrelevant— sjm only cares about the difference between women who obey men and women who need to be punished for disobedience. She promotes themes of SA, violence against women, and general brutality that uses women’s trauma as plot devices (primarily to promote male ‘heroism’).

Nesta: has strong feelings when it comes to humans as she was born a human and had her humanity taken away from her by the Cauldron. Is willing to defend and protect the race she was once a part of, always having compassion for them.

Inner circus for some fucking reason: UGH, YOU BITCH! YOU'RE HIGH FAE NOW! BE GRATEFUL YOU'RE ONE OF US. DO YOU NOT LIKE IT?

Nah because why is Feyre dissing on humans? Don't forget from whence you came. Became High Fae and think you're top shit.

Nesta and Lucien looking out for the humans, love them♥️

My rapid fire ACOTAR hot takes that y’all will hate:

I pray the pros don’t find this

I don’t ship Elriel or Elucien because I ship Elain with singleness and just traveling Prythian to learn about different plants and then settling down somewhere to become an apothecary. Is she aromantic and suffering from comphet in my head? You’ll never know

Nesta would not have eaten Lucien alive, I think she’d be tentative at first but then realize he’s not a threat to her then grow to enjoy his presence. They could have had a great romance that actually helped her grow as a person, unlike Nessian.

Nessian is a mutually destructive relationship. Cassian is too insecure to date someone who he thinks looks down at him. Nesta needs an emotionally supportive partner.

There was ZERO need to actively SA Feyre publicly to make her look subservient or as if she had a “claim” laid on her. The reasoning is weak, and SJM an Rhysand fans need to admit that they only defend it because they thought it was sexy, or because they self-insert and can’t make Rhysand actually look bad.

Tamlin isn’t a bad leader, but it doesn’t suit him. He’s much more of a people person than someone who would like to be removed from them and working on laws and politics.

Tamlin should be walking around the SC as they rebuild and see a woman directing townspeople on how to do so. Tamlin would admire her for being able to connect with people but also being able to govern well. They would have a romance and that woman would eventually become a lady and help Tamlin govern because she wants to make a difference and is good at that stuff. They eventually get married 💥

Canon Elain is my least favorite Archeron. I think she’s manipulative and worse than Nesta in her cabin behavior because she wasn’t upfront about it. She let Feyre think she was useless and kind, to later only throw her under the bus. Nesta is the one who went to the wall for Feyre, and Elain didn’t gaf about Nesta caring for her the second is stopped benefitting her. Elain even acknowledges all that Feyre did for them, and yet she still didn’t do anything

BUT to append to that, I totally get why she’s that way. It’s her only means of survival because since childhood she was treated as a doll with noice of her own. She can’t be upfront like Nesta because she won’t get taken seriously, so her only way to get what she wants is to manipulate people and use her niceness as a mask.

Nesta and Feyre have a closer relationship than Nesta and Elain solely because they were constantly arguing. Nesta “favored” Elain, but it was still distant, but she actively watched Feyre and treated her like a whole person even if it was poorly. I think this is also exemplified in their appearance. Feyre and Nesta look very similar, while Elain doesn’t look like them as much.

You can’t argue that Feyre’s childhood was traumatizing (it was) but then say that it had no negative effects on her development and ability to socialize.

Feyre is NOT good at reading people despite what y’all like to argue. She can barely read Nesta, a woman she’s known for 20 years.

She suffers from hubris and has a savior complex. For example, when the debtors came to cripple her father she notes that they only left after SHE cried and soiled herself. In her perspective she will always be the hero because that’s how she makes herself fell good.

Arguable my hottest take: I don’t think Nesta and Feyre had a power imbalance in the cottage to make their relationship abusive. In fact, I think Feyre held more power over Nesta, Nesta just didn’t acknowledge it/was mean so it didn’t seem like it. Feyre was their father’s favorite, was the breadwinner, and technically dictated whether they would get to eat. Feyre held control over her family’s survival, even if she didn’t want it, and they all knew this. It is specifically why Elain sucked up to her (a character know to jump to whoever has the most power at the moment and would protect her the most)

Feyre doesn’t act how she wants to, but rather as she thinks a good person would. She doesn’t want to hunt, but she does so because she thinks she has to. Many of her acts are “selfless” but are often shallow. She also thinks everyone wants to the helped the same way she would want to be.

To add to this, she doesn’t love her sisters. She doesn’t love them for who they are, but because of proximity. She even says to Nesta when trying to get her to come to solstice “but you’re my sister”

Feyre did not know love and it did not know her, and thus made her latch on to whoever gave her affection and she deemed as her own savior (Tamlin and Rhysand). Should she finally ever feel suffocated by Rhysand (though he has ensured she won’t), I wouldn’t doubt that she would run to another.

Feyre has 0 healthy relationships. ZILCH

By adulthood, Feyre’s illiteracy is no one’s fault but her own. As a child she didn’t want to ask Nesta, but she didn’t ask Elain or her father either. Even then they fell into poverty at like 9 and she still didn’t learn much so that doesn’t make sense. She refused Tamlin’s help and Rhysand literally had to force her to learn.

Rhysand’s character makes 0 sense when you consider her upbringing, family, friends, personality, and powers, and is just a product of SJM trying to write the morally grey ultimate love interest.

I’m on the fence about him being a master manipulator towards Feyre and the IC. I doubt Sarah meant for him to come off like that, but if he actually was it would be a masterful story and make his character feel more cohesive.

HOWEVER, if he was a manipulator I don’t think it would be that impressive for him to manipulate Feyre. She is naive and new to the world of fae, and she switches her opinions like night and day. She would be the perfect target. Again, this comes about from her upbringing and her own hubris.

The series should stuck to being a trilogy. Insert it drags on and makes new problems that aren’t even properly addressed

This was not rapid I fear

Double update. We've been officially together for a few weeks, and he's the greatest ever.

The semester just started and straight out the gate, my professors are insane. But I finally graduated so I am excited for that but I don't imagine ill get a lot of writing or reviews done in the meantime. While insane one of my professors is really cool so ill look forward to that class and I also joined a creative writing club. There's a fine shyt in there yall I GOT MOTIVATION NOW.

OMGGG

So guys between work college and attempting to have a social life I've not been able to update which sucks bc I think about this page every day. Once classes subside I should have some extra time.