If I Can Add To This, I Have Been Working On This Theme Quite Recently, And Actually Made A Movie Around

"Don't let the little fuckers generation gap you" ~ William Gibson, "Neuromancer"

8 May 2013

there is no going back, run with the railroad

journal entry from the road, 1AM 13.08.2023, Istria, Croatia.

Inspired by Keren Cytter’s „White Diaries” I’m launching an irregular series of journal entries from the road (I am on the road pretty much the whole time, since last June). May these entries contribute to my monography or at least to my graduation movie.

I’m in amok. For the most of the day I’ve been in amok. I’ve been calling my friends frantically, talking with them about my next, September journey. Planning things isn’t as exciting as it used to be. Today I’ve committed a faux pas. I gave in to my inner greedy goblin. My friend Joffroy told me that he’s got a spot for a vintage near Lyon. I, blinded by vision of being 1800 euros richer enthusiastically signed up, even tho I’ve dropped out of it almost a month ago. Five minutes before that I’ve been bitching to my parents that I feel like I’m being fucked over by my friends, cause I try to make everyone feel good and combine their busy calendars with my urge to go to Latvia to see art and drop acid and whatever else do nomadic art students do when they don’t attend universities. As soon as I announced my decision to leave for a vintage in France, to my Latvian crew they got angry, rightfully. I lacked empathy for my koibito, since we wouldn’t see each other for over 4 months and I didn’t even tell them in a separate call or message bout that. They told me they felt very sad. They were right, it was too sudden, but I was in amok, just today W420’s aunt told us she wouldn’t be hosting us in Berlin, which derailed our summer plans for 7th or 8th time. I took the occasion as it happened, but than I reflected on it realized I could’ve done it more smoothly. I apologized, we sent each others some music we found, it’s better now. Mediatized communication sucks ass. Tomorrow I’m gonna text my koibito I got kicked out anyway since I can’t work for the whole duration of the vintage (that’s 100% true). We’re gonna go to Riga. My parents told Riga is cheap and cool. I don’t have a joint like Cytter does in her diaries, but maybe for the better? It would hurt my lungs and I would get stoned too much, I have weak tolerance. I’m currently living in something that resembles a very luxurious refugee camp, with almost no POC, only rich, white german kids. Imagine 2000 people in tents and vans, crowded, laying almost on another with pitches among those little 5 meter pines. All the way from the mountain to the sea. My dog is getting mad over people walking near the tent. Swimming has cleared my mind. Deep blue of sea depths does its job. I need to sit down and write down some of my research notes for my new movie. I’m gonna build a dirty video mixer. Hopefully with my koibito, we’re gonna play something together. Soon I’m gonna write an analysis about “Parable of the Sower” by Octavia Butler and “Diamond Age” by Neal Stephenson with their implications for further research and my upcoming movie. The landscape is very cowboy here. It’s dry, cut in half with a big road. It’s very sharp and high resolution, like a photo taken on a quality color film. With colors so bright it deceives you at first, that it wasn’t taken on a Texaco station in 1985. This is a landscape Rango wanted to die in.

Reminder to people upon gaining power it took Hitler only 57 days to dismantle German democracy and declare himself dictator and start purging the "undesirables"

Signal boost!

Recently my beloved cat has been diagnosed with tumours on her milk glands. She is scheduled for surgery on October 18th. The surgery co//st is quite a lot for me so any tips, com//missions or shares are greatly appreciated! The tumours are very small as they were caught early so her chances for recovery have been estimated as very high and she should be alright after the procedure. She has been with me since my childhood and she’s extremely dear to me. Even with her age (14) other than hyperthyroidism and an eye condition, she has been in perfect health. Both those conditions have been in check since they were diagnosed a few months ago and she’s a very happy and lively cat.

The cost has been estimated as about $520 + bloodwork that will be done on Monday and after surgery care. $1 = ~4 PLN so even small tips can make a world of a difference.

Thank you for any help!🐈‍⬛💔💔💔

The f/undraiser in Polish (you can translate that page into English at the bottom):

pomagam.pl/bpcghr

Pomagam.pl

Mastektomia kotki Fisi | Pomagam.pl

Fisia jest kochaną czternastoletnią kotką, o czarnym futerku. Całe swoje życie towarzyszy swojemu właścicielowi od dzieciństwa.  Mimo swojeg

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YOU WILL FIND A WAY!!!! YOU WILL FIND A WAY . You will find a WAY ….. you WILL find a way . You will find a way you will find a way……!! YOU WILL FIND A WAY YOU WILL FIND A WAY you will find a Way you will (find) a way you will find. a way you will find a way YOU WILL FIND A WAY!!!!!!!

“a bad omen i saw over my home not long after seeing an exhibition about the fate of civilians in Warsaw Ghetto”, 2024/5784.

Yeah, it pains me so much. I have so much other things to say, but I'm arguing online with bigoted idiots. And even my art suffers from that, that I have to use as a sort of autotherapy for the vitriol of the web.

every jewish person's tumblr is now a jewish tumblr.

I have seen so, so many tumblrs post something like, "This used to be my x blog, but ever since Oct 7 I've just been posting Jewish stuff." Because we're all suddenly drowning in antisemitism and reaching out to each other to build community to combat that.

It would be nice if Jewish life could go back to not revolving around antisemitism. But then, a part of me says, that was all it was before the Shoah; maybe it was just the time from afterward until Oct 7th that was the unusual part. Maybe this is what it'll be for the rest of our lives.

Uncredited Photographer Headquarters of the German Communist Party (KPD), Featuring the Logo of the KPD's Anti-fascist Paramilitary Group, Antifaschistische Aktion, Berlin 1932