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10/10 would bang. But also: 10/10 would care for you 10/10 would tuck you in 10/10 would cuddle 10/10 would make sure you get to sleep okay 10/10 would make you breakfast in the morning

May march be good to you. But if it isn’t, may you find a way to be kind to yourself even when the circumstances around you aren’t the greatest instead of punishing yourself for things that are out of your control 🌱

Reyla's Metaphor

Imagine, if you will, that each of us lives inside our own house. Each of our houses are different. Some are small some are big. Some are plain and simple, while others are complicated and eclectic. Some are low maintenance or easy to fix. Some are constantly broken or need repairs often. While growing up in our houses we've seen them grow and change with us. We decorated them, replaced or re-arranged the furniture, painted, remodeled, added an extension, removed and extension, etc. Some of us are comfortable in our homes, and some of us aren't. Most of us like our homes but would change some things if we could.

For the most part, I didn't hate my house. It did what a house should do, and it did it reliably. I even had a lot of fun in it. But then one day, I found a door in my house that I hadn't ever noticed before. It had a window. When I looked through it, I saw that my home had a backyard. I opened the door and stared out in disbelief.

"Had this been here the whole time? I've been living in this house for 31 years and I'm only just now seeing this?!?"

I was cautious at first and it wasn't a good time to explore my new-found space, so I closed the door and went about my normal indoor business. Over the next several months and years I revisited this door and began to explore the backyard. It was bigger than the house. It amazed me with all sorts of gardenia and outdoor living space. And the more I explored, the less I wanted to go back inside the house. In the backyard I came alive. There, I could feel things I never felt before, and more vividly. The air was fresh and I could breath deeply and more easily. The sky dazzled magically out there.

Then one day, I discovered a gate.

"Another mysterious door? A second backyard perhaps?"

Delighted at the prospects of having even more space to explore, I let my curiosity put my hand on the latch. I was not prepared for what I opened into. For on the other side of that gate, was a vast and endless countryside. Mountains, hills, canyons, valleys, lakes, rivers, maybe someday I'll even find oceans!

The more I travel this countryside, the more I learn about myself. Having found and opened that gate changed everything. And now I want my house to emulate the beauty and grandeur of this countryside. This is where my very soul resides.

This is what it's like to realize that there is more to your soul and your identity than your body's genome. And it is certainly more magnanimous than 2 or 3 mortal chromosomal proteins can embody. Having found a greater version of myself, my true self which I'm still exploring, I want my house to be a better representation of who I am. Something much more genuine. I've redecorated and I'm remodeling. I'm rediscovering designs that I thought weren't for me because they were too 'Fem' or whatever.

Thinking back on it, I had looked out that window before on several occasions throughout my life. I just never realized it was actually a doorway.

I know some people don't like the way I'm decorating my house, even to the point they think it shouldn't be permitted in public (or even in private for some extremists). And there are people who think I should be locked inside the old version of my house never to see the mountains or stars again. But you can't undiscover yourself anymore than you can uncrack an egg. I can never go back, and I will stand up for everyone else who wishes to enter their own backyards.

Some people discover their backyard very early in life. Some people see the door, get scared, and never look at it again. For Cis people, their backyard is already congruent with their house. Well, mostly congruent anyway.

Art by Patrycja Wójcik

a long time ago, my roommates had an argument over whether or not hamburgers are sandwiches. this actually got heated to the point of one of the guys having to get upset and walk away because he was convinced that hamburgers are not sandwich, but instead their own classification of food.

people will pick any hill to die on- we as a species cannot 100% all agree on the definition of anything. that's why we can't agree on the definition of gay, queer, lesbian, trans, bi, pan, aromantic, asexual, etc. because we as a species just can't do that. we all have a unique perspective on what concepts are and what they mean.

if we can't agree on whether or not a hamburger is a sandwich or not, i think it's best if we learn to agree to disagree on what the "true" meaning of gay, lesbian, trans, queer, etc. are and just let people live their version of that identity in peace. at the end of the day it literally doesn't matter if you don't know if a hamburger is a sandwich or just a hamburger- you're still going to eat it and gain nutrients from it.

a trans person having a different definition of trans than you, or a lesbian defining lesbianism differently than what they've been told, or any other type of queer person defining their identity in their own way isn't a threat to you- at the end of the day, it doesn't stop them from being trans, a lesbian, queer, or whatever. disagreeing on the definition won't stop it from happening; it's just petty. not every hill is meant for someone to die on. let go

When the spirits come to lift you up, feel them. Be present with them. And may you walk forward knowing that you're not alone in your struggles.