“It's Taboo To Admit That You're Lonely. You Can Make Jokes About It, Of Course. You Can Tell People

A totally unexpected plan ending as a tool to rediscover your sexuality and dabbling into other's fantasies as it made you tap into your inner dom is ecstatic, especially when you've been in a constant bpd depressive episode and stuck in every other aspect of your life.

I never lost it but found something even more exciting.

Along with bpd, is unreal in another dimension

having bipolar and being told you have it for the rest of your life with no cure feels so unreal to me.

— In the Future, Jay Hulme, in '100 Queer Poems, an anthology' (2022)

[text ID: I've forgotten what my face looks like / but can easily describe my spine. / The way it bends under pressure, / the way it curves, but will not break.]

I'm tired of this ritual

again I write with disdain,

my heart is heavy with sorrow

perpetually drowning in pain.

How accurate.

- j (x)

I need to destroy myself to feel satisfied

I can't feel the hurt or the pain,

only the excruciating absence of happiness.

My name is written in agony and love that consumes me.

Anger bursts inside of me as fire crackers under the moonlight, with a cackle first and then a battle cry.