Random Physics Comp I Probably Bombed 😭

I know this is a long read but I believe this might help if you’re going through a burnout.

Last week I was so drained I couldn’t do anything. Let alone studying 11 hours a day as I planned, some days I couldn’t even pick up my pen and solve just one question.

Each day I said to myself “It will be better tomorrow. I will wake up and finish the things I need to do.” but every day proved to be worse than the other. My tutor was out of the city for a conference so I was on my own and needed to finish everything before he arrived. (I am a person who scolds herself if I don’t finish my tasks on time, even if sometimes my teachers don’t care, I do.) But I couldn’t finish most of them. Today is literally my last chance. I had to wake up at 5am and rarely take any breaks if I wanted to complete everything.

But I couldn’t. I woke up at 9, and just getting out of bed took all my energy. I went into the living room and fell asleep on the couch. For three hours, no matter how many times my mum tried to annoy me into waking up, I laid there without even once uttering a word.

And by my 1682597th dream, I had an epiphany.

This is my journey. This is me, working towards my own dream. People around me obviously care and feel for me, that’s why they worry when I fall behind. But if they had to give in the energy I give in each day, they couldn’t do it.

Because I wake up every day to my goals. Every morning I choose to keep going. Every second I am choosing to not give up on my dreams of becoming a successful person. I could easily change my mind any minute, choose another major, and I wouldn’t have to study as hard.

But I am not.

For 454 straight days, I woke up with this dream and there wasn’t a single day I didn’t want it. Not a single day where I said “Oh you know what, fuck it. I don’t want this.”

I had my days where I cried, screamed, even hit myself. I had my days where I was so exhausted that I kept looking at other majors I could get into but I never felt the same connection so I just stood up and kept working.

I am the one who might lose what I want, not others. I am the only one who is putting in the effort to make it happen because nobody else’s effort could make it possible for me.

So if I say “I did not have the energy for this.” they have to believe me.

If I am honestly EXHAUSTED, to a point where I don’t want to see my favorite pencil, it’s okay for me to fall behind a few weeks.

Now I will just get up. Once again. And do what I can. No rush, I have 145 days to go, and it’s better to actually learn the material than to have to come back to it later.

Keep trying. Even if it’s reading one sentence a day. Your dreams are yours for a reason.

last week this actually worked a little bit, so i'm going to continue doing this. unfortunately, i didn't finish my research paper on immigration by the due date, so i got an extension to this wednesday.

FINISH immigration research paper

submit to photography competition

study for lab quiz :)

gas law and graham's law problem sets

thermodynamics problem set

physics quiz

thermodynamics frq

revise mini-essay

finish enigma machine simulation

probability problem sets

GUESS WHO'S BACK!!

Not me.

I've finished writing my dissertation (no beta we die. we just die) but I still have my whole ass presentation to prepare.

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I'll defend this shit in two days.

Ever wonder how stars and planets form? New clues have been found in the protoplanetary system Herbig-Haro 30 by the James Webb Space Telescope, Hubble and the Earth-bound telescope ALMA. The observations show, that large dust grains are more concentrated into a central disk where they can form planets. The featured image from Webb shows many attributes of the HH-30 system. Jets of particles are being expelled vertically, shown in red, while a dark dust-rich disk is seen across the center, blocking the light from the star or stars still forming there. Blue-reflecting dust is seen in an arc above and below the central disk, although why a tail appears on the lower left is currently unknown. Studying how planets form in HH 30 can help astronomers better understand how planets in our own Solar System once formed, including the Earth.

Image Credit & Copyright: James Webb Space Telescope, ESA, NASA & CSA, R. Tazaki et al.

the problem with this coffee shop is that it’s too cute and too expensive and my wallet cannot keep going here every other week

Milky Way & meteor at Yellowstone Park

m42 (great nebula in orion) | 28 sec | 1/12/25

f=ma exam…. either i cooked or completely flunked lol

life lately.

also chat do you fw buzzfeed unsolved :D

i'm going to lock in for the month of october! so i'm making a list on here of everything i have to do this week and seeing if i can finish it

thermodynamics module

photography composition practice

titration procedure / lab / analysis / presentation

midterm review sheet

immigration research paper

particle motion lab

energy conversion lab

add magnetic field to ising model simulation

finish chapter 2 part 1 of cs textbook

mini-essay of music in great gatsby

practice test for analysis midterm

read chapter 6 of great gatsby

crossing my fingers that this holds me accountable. my procrastination is way out of control...