those who stick with you, are meant for you. the only person you need validation from is you. don’t change for others. doing so will only distance yourself from your true, authentic self. listen to music you like, no matter how sporadic the genres are! wear the clothes you find cute, different and cool even if it’s not “trending”. trends die but you and your amazing taste is forever!! change for YOU. do what makes YOU happy. <3
learn how to say no. learn how to say yes. change is uncomfortable but so is growth. how do you expect to be successful and get farther into your journey if you don’t say yes to amazing opportunities because fear stops you? how do you expect to be strong and unapologetically yourself if you don’t say no to the people who keep stepping all over you? maintain a balance. set boundaries— with others and yourself. if i can do it, so can you. you deserve to set yourself free.
discipline is the key. stop waiting for *countless* motivation. slumps happen. it’s normal. feel your emotions but you know what? you will always get back up on your feet. no matter how long it takes. you’ll get there. this goes for everything. people, old habits, etc. don’t let your negative thoughts ruin you when you come across a slump. feel them but don’t give them power.
motivation can only take you so far. it’s pleating. one slump after another, i soon realized that motivation is often the result of action, not the cause of it. you simply just have to start and not rely on anything but you and the discipline you enforce to achieve your goals. you see one amazing manifestation success story? great. now stop looking for even more validation. you know it’s possible. so go and apply the law, angel. THAT is the discipline I’m talking about.
it doesn’t matter how “small” the step is, you are still moving! find yourself struggling with intrusive thoughts and old limiting beliefs? discipline! tell yourself it’s okay it happens then move on knowing you have all the power.
you are capable of living your dream life. you know what’s stopping you though? you. only you. your fear of change because it seems uncomfortable, your refusal to see how much power you hold over your life, the guilt from telling yourself that you don’t deserve it. open and allow yourself to see that everything you’ve ever wanted is NOT impossible. you can do this. if others can have it, why not you? what you desire is meant for you. it’s out there.
treat yourself with care. do it out of love for you. manifest that dream lifestyle, your dream career, dream house, dream appearance because you deserve it! cut those toxic people off so you’re no longer surrounded by their energies and mindsets. take yourself out on a solo date, get a nice meal, take yourself out shopping because you deserve to have time for yourself. read a new book, go on adventures, try new things because you deserve to live your life to it’s FULLEST! do EVERYTHING for YOU. you have gone through every battle, success, cry, celebration and all of the above since the very beginning with yourself so why not do things for you? give yourself more credit. remember: your choices, your dreams, your life.
love you. have the best year. im always here for you. x.
A routine inspired by thewizardliz ? She has skin care hair care routine reads motivating books
This is a guide on daily routines inspired by Thewizardliz! This routine is perfect to stop being lazy and pathetic and finally start taking care of yourself!
content list (routines):
morning
study
workout
shower + self care
night
(_ _ ) . . z Z⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚୨ :★: ୧ ∗ ˖࣪ ໒꒱ ˚₊·
🧼 First things first, after you wake up make sure to drink water to boost your metabolism throughout the day! Also, create a mind movie so you can watch it everyday after you wake up.
Now, take your journal and start writing about your dream, ideal higher self, ask yourself questions like ‘What reality do i want to create?´ 'Who do i look up to?’ ‘What is the behavior I need to change about myself?’ ‘What's a new habit that I would like to create?’ ‘What is a thing I can focus on right now?’. After we have in mind who we want to become, it's important that every little decision you make today is centered to achieve your goals, and become your dream self. You can listen to a podcast while doing this so you get motivation!
💶 Then, head to the bathroom and look at yourself in the mirror and start repeating positive affirmations, such as ‘I am so beautiful’ or ‘My hair looks so pretty today’, even if you don't believe it, having a positive mindset is going to help us to stay in track with our goals!
Take care of your teeth, Liz says that our smile is one of the most important things in a person, and one of the key things that is going to make you more attractive! so, make sure to brush your teeth, floss, clean your tongue, etc.
🛣 Liz has a rather simple skincare routine, since her skin is so sensitive, it only consists of using a foam cleanser, moisturizer and eye cream to help with her eye bags.
Next step is to research and find our own personal clothing and makeup style, find out your body type, personal color, face shape, etc. It doesn't matter if you have to mix multiple styles that already exist to make your own! The most important thing is to feel comfortable while wearing those clothes or having that type of makeup on your face.
🏔 Liz doesn't like to force herself to have breakfast, she just dont eat if she's not hungry, however if you are hungry rather than focusing on calories focus on how nutritious your meal is. Whatsoever if you are not hungry and you are not going to eat, make sure to always take your vitamins and supplements!
Yes, it's time to drink a little more water!
⛰ Liz doesn't have a settled study routine but, it's important to spend our time wisely, if you can finish an assignment way before the time it's due, DO IT! Also, she emphasized that knowledge leads to confidence. If you put effort in your studies, every little thing in your life will slowly fall into place.
First, set healthy goals, like toning up your body or building muscle, try not to make ‘just being skinny’ your goal.
🧩 second, don't measure yourself with a scale or measuring tape and focus on how you look in the mirror, are you satisfied? if you are then you are done with the intense workout routine!
Liz goes to the gym and has her own personal training program, but here’s some kind of exercises she recommends; weight training, pilates and dancing with her main focus being toning up her abs and butt.
🏄♀️ Remember to drink water and that consistency is more important than perfection, go at your own pace, it doesn't matter if you can't do a 2 hour workout and look snatched in 3 days and you can only do a 5 minute workout, every little effort adds up!
Before showering, do dry brushing to exfoliate your skin and increase circulation (1-2 times per week). Then use shampoo and conditioner, research to find the best one for you, what may help others won't help you. Liz also uses a hair mask 1 to 2 times per week to get that shiny silk hair.
🎾 After showering take some time to shape and pluck your eyebrows depending on your face shape and what impression you want to give!
Liz uses face masks 1 to 2 times per week to cleansing her face deeply, then she does her skincare. After applying all the products do a lymphatic massage on your face and neck, you can also cool down your face with massagers or cold spoons for an extra depuff.
🍾 For self care, you can journal again, search for shadow work prompts, think of what things you should unlearn and relearn and don't forget to practice gratitude. Or you can take time to clean your room or house, you deserve to have a clean safe place!
Oh! and don't forget to drink water again.
🧃 Time for dinner! (only if you are not full yet), again, make sure to focus on nutrients rather than calories. Don't forget to drink a glass of water with your dinner. You can watch a documentary while eating to keep gaining even more knowledge.
Now, do your oral hygiene routine again. Also, put on eyelash conditioner and serum to wake up with perfect lashes! Then wear a silk cap or do a protective hairstyle to protect your hair from getting damaged while you're sleeping.
🍵 Then get in bed and drink a cup of tea with collagen to start relaxing your body. and it's finally time to manifest! watch your mind movie again and use your most useful method (affirming visualizing, subliminals, etc.), don't forget to ask god, the universe or whatever you believe in for signals and help!
Afterwards, you can read an inspirational book like ‘atomic habits’ or ‘the art of thinking clearly’ to keep nourishing your brain. keep a reachable goal like reading 5 pages everyday and then decide if you want to continue reading or not.
🥬 Before sleeping listen to a guided meditation, liz have one to be more confident and one to attract money, choose one that aligns with your goals!
Finally fall asleep in a healthy sleeping position, Liz sleeps in her back looking at the roof, but you can choose your favorite position, don't forget to get a pillow that fits the position (example: tall and lofty pillow -> for sleeping on your side)
🍈 Good night!
Woah second request done!! hope you liked this one was pretty fun to do and I might add some of these things in my own personal routine so I don't fall back into laziness, anyways how about you guys??
toodlezzzz!1!!!!!
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──────── ⵌ SMALL HEART ...
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──────── ⵌ HEART STAR ...
okey, seriously, last one. happy Valentine’s Day everyone ! sending you all the warmest hugs heehee 🥰
please like, reblog, and credit if you use :)
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♡ channel your inner elle woods and dive into your studies with a “what, like it’s hard?“ mindset
studying will only be hard if you assume it to be. uplift yourself before starting your study session. go on a rampage on how you’re the best student at your school and that you’re successful at everything you do! the only person that will be with you from the beginning till the end is you. be your own cheerleader despite it all.
life is better when you romanticize it and nothing beats playing some music to level your head, looking at photos & scenes of your favorite characters studying and acing their tests!
clean your desk, light some candles, buy cute stationary, pretend you’re being filmed, visualize how it would feel when you have straight A’s and see that perfect score on the corner of your test/exams.
make a playlist with a cute cover and choose a vibe. dark or light academia? classics? rnb? cafe jazz? make it fun. mix it all together or make multiple playlists for the different moods you’ll be in. don’t listen to lyrical music. i recommend brown noise! and going to a cafe or a library helps me focus a lot. the background chatter doesn’t ever get too much for me so it gets easy for me to tune it out.
bambi’s supplies:
kokuyo campus binder notebooks
papier planners
laohaster aesthetic highlighters - 1 & 2
tombow dual brush pen markers
0.35 pens + muji 0.38 pens
paper mate gel pens
aesthetic book tabs
kraft paper sticky notes
index card case
i love to study at libraries and local cafes. i also use this time to go on adventures to explore my city and find hidden gems. make sure it’s a place where you like the vibe, there are no distractions. something about looking like that mysterious, studious girl who stays to herself >>>>
before you indulge in your studies, be aware of your surroundings. get familiar with the place by grazing your eyes over the area and begin :)
make a checklist of all the items you need. laptop, charger, pens, notebooks, textbooks, a book to read if you want to spend more time at the place you’re at, headphones, calculator, etc!
if you’d rather stay inside, make your area is clean of clutter and clear of distractions.
now that you’ve set out a place, let’s talk about time. what hours in the day work for you? morning, afternoons or at night? what weekdays work the best for you to keep up with this schedule?
be reasonable with yourself here. pick a time where your schedule is free and you won’t be distracted by obligations. tell your friends and family you’ll be busy during those hours on selected weekdays, not everyday will be the same. life can be hectic so this is where you take responsibility. work around your appointments. make use of your time and run flash cards while you wait to get called in or you’re in line, while you exercise, get creative!
setting time away to eat and make sure you drink enough water is not equally but more important than any other thing. take care of yourself.
utilize your time wisely. no one and nothing is going to achieve those goals. you are.
now, let’s actually get into how i study.
create a system that works for you. keep a list of all of your assignments, finals, exams, tests, projects in an excel spreadsheet organized and ascended by the due dates and the progress of its completion. here are two very simple examples i made.
as you progress through the list, it’s always so good to see the growing checkmarks! like yes, you did that and you can continue doing so! i always advocate for keeping track of your accomplishments no matter what ♡
as for day to day classes and schedules, you can use notion or google calendar. there are plenty of cute and practical templates out there to use.
let me know if i should share mine or make some
the most important thing a student can do is put themselves first! find out what works for you. your strengths, your weaknesses, and obstacles you tend to come across and work around them to make the best out of it.
we’ve already covered the topics of time and place so great! now, that you’re all set, additional things i keep in mind to make sure i am all nice and comfortable are…
making sure i am comfortable. the temperature, clothes i am wearing, if i feel safe at the cafe/library/room i’m in.
i can’t focus or do anything on an empty stomach so get a small meal before you start and keep water and snacks with you!
the most important questions of all: are there any illnesses you have that affect your studying and focus? what is something you often find that gets in your way?
as hard as dealing with illnesses gets on a daily basis, it’s easy to forget that it can affect your studies just as much. you need to work with them. i used to think i was stupid, slow, and downright crazy for not understanding material right away or for how easily distracted i got because of my random bursts of energy. then it just dawned upon me one day and i said “oh… duh?”
so, what did i do? i found out what worked for me, monitored my studying techniques and personally modified them to work better with my attention deficit.
tackle the important tasks first. low maintenance assignments like reading and writing notes on a section, annotations, and worksheets can wait if they’re easy but this way might not be for everyone.
the reason why i advise this is because at the beginning of a study session, i have the most energy/brain power so i’d rather shift my energy towards the assignments that need more of my focus!
plan what tasks you intend on focusing on that day. look at your assignment spreadsheet. which ones are more important/urgent? due the soonest? write them out in order and follow the list.
immediately writing down my thoughts. i’m very forgetful so making this a habit has helped me so much for when i get any new ideas and remember to do something very important.
find out what learning style fits you. visual, auditory, reading and writing, kinesthetic. making powerpoints, study guides, drawing diagrams, color coding systems, interactive notes. cater your study methods to your needs. here is a pinterest board with examples!
take a self assessment quiz. if you want, check these quizzes out to figure out what kind of learner you are and what study habits you can improve! remember that you can always be more than one thing just because quizzes give you a single result. you know you!
active recall. it’s a study method to help with retention, memorization, and informational retrieval. it reduces forgetfulness all the while actively stimulating your brain rather than writing notes, highlighting text information.
separate the topics + subtopics and in the end, when you feel confident, jumble them together.
flashcards! i love them. you can use quizlet which has a spaced repetition system where it will bring back material you got wrong so you can focus on it extensively. physical flashcards and manually having to write them out is also a form of memorization!
practice testing (not multiple choice) online or finding them on a textbook, ask a friend to quiz you or ask questions to yourself and try to answer them accurately.
pretend to give a lecture. i love this one the most because if you know the subject very well, you can pretend to explain it to a peer and even a middle schooler so that it gives you a chance to simplify the material so it’s easy for them (and you) to retain.
while using flashcards and lecture techniques, it helps me when my adhd flares up and i really can’t seem to stay still or keep from making noise. i can walk around my room & talk aloud, walk on a treadmill, and move my body!
i study until it becomes natural for me to know the answer, not because i recognize the term.
check your work and understanding to make sure that all of the information you’re studying is correct! it won’t hurt to do a little review here and there. you never know when a mistake might’ve snuck it’s way in.
make your own study guide. (if that’s your method) for every unit and section, covering every topic. this can be on google docs and whenever you learn something new that you think is important to know, add it via docs app or write it on a notepad so that you can fill it in later.
on the go. you don’t have to do this ALL the time (or at all) but if you think you need more time to soak your mind with information but you’re on a bus, waiting in line, etc. pull out your flashcards or google docs app to quickly review. there’s no harm in that! (just make sure you’re aware of your surroundings please)
OFFICE HOURS! go to office hours even if you don’t have any specific questions or struggles! it’s always an extra learning opportunity because you can listen to teachers and teaching assistants answer questions you might have later on AND the more you attend office hours, you’ll build a connection and get to know the teachers. that is always important.
starting assignments ahead of time. don’t put off working on a project just because it’s due in 3 weeks or so. start ahead of time so you don’t stress yourself out and cram. stretch them out. plus, even if you don’t actually put yourself to work, get a feel of the materials you’ll need to know, the instructions, etc because if you have any questions, you’ll have more/easy access to teachers for help since not many people will be there at the beginning of when a project is assigned.
ADVANCE READING! this is so fun to do. you basically just read ahead on current/future topics the teacher will cover to grasp onto the information. write down any questions you have and personally ask the teacher for a more clear answer for your understanding.
i love doing this because when the time comes of the teacher covering the topic, light bulbs just keep going off in my head! it’s exciting. it gives me room for me to retain and write any additional information the teacher says.
do not multitask. remember, if multitasking has always worked for you, don’t stop! for me, it’s truly better to focus on the task at hand to strengthen skills and concentration rather than having to do 2 or 3 different things at once. efficiency is key and staying true to one task at a time is the best way to do so.
BUT when my adhd gets in the way, be consistently inconsistent. don’t unnecessarily guilt trip yourself when you suddenly feel like doing another task. go with the flow. follow whatever your brain feels like doing at the moment! MOVEMENT IS MOVEMENT.
additional tip: take breaks at certain times even if you don’t feel like it. like the advice above, it doesn’t necessarily have to be resting. it can be as simple as taking a trip to get a beverage, tidying up your area, something easy & light to keep your mind occupied and to avoid burn out.
breaking down the assignments into sections. this defeats procrastination. it can seem overwhelming when all the information is pieced together into one so divide the tasks into small sections.
ex. read one chapter in the textbook, start writing down terms to know, annotate. move onto the next.
study groups. it’s collaborative— a chance to ask and also help others on topics you don’t know and make connections! the smaller the better in my opinion.
don’t look at studying as something you “have" to do. it’s an activity. a choice. it can either be stressful or something you can easily get through— how you approach this will ;
participate! ask questions! don’t be afraid to ask questions and raise your hand to put your two cents in when it’s an open discussion! just do it.
focus on the now. don’t overwhelm yourself by looking at all the assignments you have due. the task you’re working on at the present moment is the one that needs the most attention and focus.
advice from others won’t always work for you. we are all different! what might work for others won’t always work for you. this is why it’s important to monitor your study sessions, habits, behaviors, and find out what works and what you like better through trial and error.
except for when i tell you to take care of yourself. if there’s anything you should take away from my posts, it is to put your needs first. always!
“think of motivation as a power boost at the starting line and your foot pressing on the pedal of your car is discipline, it’s what keeps you going forward on your journey. motivation, as fleeting as it is won’t bring you far but self-discipline will.“
remind yourself of the life you want to live, the businesses you will own, the cases you’ll win, the people you’ll be able to help with your knowledge, the feelings you’ll have because of your amazing accomplishments if you just keep. on. going.
read the “continuing to strengthen self discipline” section in my dream girl guide post. i guarantee it will help in finding what really works best for you when it comes to identifying roadblocks and how to work around these struggles.
KEEP UP THE MOMENTUM. you’ve been on top of your game so when it comes to engaging in activities that don’t revolve around school work, make it worthwhile. stay off your phone, say no to silly distractions and do something you’ll thoroughly enjoy. paint, draw, write, read a book, go on a walk! this will keep you going in doing your very best every day and it doesn’t have to be a strenuous activity! stagnancy who?
DOING ANYTHING THAT BRINGS YOU JOY AND FULFILLMENT IS PRODUCTIVE.
TAKE BREAKS. GO TO SLEEP. EAT WELL.
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.
DO NOT PUT THIS ON THE BACK BURNER. you want good grades and to do your very best, that can’t happen unless you TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.
if it’s past your usual bedtime and your eyes are drooping, struggling to stay open, how are you able to retain all the information from that moment on? go to bed because then you’ll get a good night’s sleep and you’ll be refreshed for your next day’s class! OR if you don’t have class, you’ll be able to bounce back into studying in amazing condition.
PAMPER YOURSELF.
good heavens, take a shower, wash your face, go for a walk, move your body, stretch, take time to just stay to yourself. enjoy the silence, play some calming music, watch a show, take a nap. your body is a temple, treat it with love.
if you’re constantly stressed out all the while continuously flooding your brain with so much information without resting:
it decreases concentration → you won’t be able to retain any new information (so studying is automatically deemed useless) → poor sleep → you attend class and your inability to focus and overall school performance has degraded→ you isolate yourself from social interactions → fall into depression → difficulty picking yourself back up and the list goes on…
in summary, you will not be able to continue and put in your best work.
always remember that pushing yourself past your limit does more harm than good.
you WILL crash and all that hard work will go to waste once you’re physically and mentally unable to show up for yourself.
and if it means you have to get anything lower than a 80, IT IS OKAY. nothing is worth more than your health. trust me.
zlibrary + openlibrary - free online libraries
websites for research that is not google
weava highlighter - highlight text from pdfs and the web, add and organize notes and be able to access later! lifesaver.
99 legal sites to download literature
speechify - text to speech reader
not robotic. comes in many different voices and languages
aids in: easy reading, improve comprehension, multitaskers
adjustable reading speed
mercury reader - gets rid of clutter from articles for easy reading
grammarly - grammar and writing check
beeline reader - color gradient to help read easier
group your tabs for easy organization (for mac users: control + click)
piktochart - create infographics
spot misinformation - masterpost
desmos - free online graphing calculator
paper rater - essay scoring
pdf2go + cloudconvert - file converters
internet archive - free books, movies, software, music, websites…
slidesgo - google slides and powerpoint templates
pomodoro timers - tide w/ white noise + otto w/ a website blocker
remember to drink water
more very helpful resources
okay my love! that’s all for this post. i wish you the best! ₊˚⊹♡ as always, here is the google doc version
— kisses from straight a student, bambi ♡
SCHOOL IS BACK IN SESSION
INVEST IN YOURSELF: FALL + SCHOOL EDITION GUIDE HERE
why is tumblr so dead??? did everyone die???
wanted to post this on it's own because i spent so much time on it...
where?
schoolwork:
study hard
take cute notes
get good grades
stay out of drama
be respectful and kind to everyone
work hard and stay motivated
appearance:
keep a neat appearance
put effort into your outfits
have healthy hair
make sure your nails are always manicured
try a teeth-whitening toothpaste (highly recommend!)
find a signature scent to keep in your bag
simple makeup also works- just curl your lashes and wear mascara
overall:
have a good school/life balance
try new things
stay positive
be yourself!
it’s all so quiet
I have been collecting my favorite quotes for the past few years now. Many of these have gotten me through tough classes, long study nights, and reminded me to work hard for what I want most in life. Save this post and read it when you need it. But keep in mind, reading motivational quotes won’t get your work done. It only inspires a spark of motivation. You have to actually do the work afterwards too.
If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door (Milton Berle)
Think about exactly what you don’t want and then do the direct opposite
The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person who is doing it
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs (Farrah Gray)
Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds (Gordon B. Hinckley)
Success comes from knowing that you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming (John Wooden)
80% of success is just showing up
If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten (Tony Robbins)
Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up (Thomas Edison)
If you really want the key to success, start by doing the opposite of what everyone else is doing (Brad Szollose)
Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough (Og Mandino)
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me (Ayn Rand)
It is never too late to be what you might have been (George Eliot)
A good plan violently executed now is better than a perfect plan executed next week (George Patton)
The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out (Robert Collier)
Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant (Robert Louis Stevenson)
Either you run the day or the day runs you (Jim Rohn)
The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today (H. Jackson Brown, Jr.)
Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself (George Bernard Shaw)
I attribute my success to this – I never gave or took any excuse (Florence Nightingale)
You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do (Henry Ford)
Formula for success: rise early, work hard, strike oil (J. Paul Getty)
Success is dependent on effort (Sophocles)
Change your life today. Don’t gamble on the future, act now, without delay (Simone de Beauvoir)
Success depends upon previous preparation, and without such preparation there is sure to be failure (Confucius)
You simply have to put one foot in front of the other and keep going. Put blinders on and plow right ahead (George Lucas)
Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day (Jim Rohn)
It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop (Confucius)
Productivity is never an accident. It is always the result of a commitment to excellence, intelligent planning, and focused effort.
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit
Commitment is staying true to what you said you were going to do long after the mood you said it in had left.
Don’t ask what’s the least you can do to be good. Ask what’s the most you can bare to be great.
Ask yourself if what you are doing today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow.
Don’t study until you get it right. Study until you can’t get it wrong.
Get up early enough to set your intentions for the day in stone. A good morning is the beginning of a successful day. You are capable of everything you want to do today. You are strong, secure and able to achieve. There is no task too hard when you believe in every ability you hold, you are determined to hit every goal. Do not give up on yourself.
Every positive change in your life begins with a clear, unequivocal decision that you are going to either do something or stop doing something.
Hard work will never betray you.
Aggressive goals require aggressive work ethic.
The best way for you to predict your future is to create it (Abraham Lincoln)
The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing (Walt Disney)
The price of excellence is discipline. The cost of mediocrity is disappointment (William Arthur Ward)
You need to understand that studying requires extensive training. Study habits, amount of sleep, timing. Therefore, you should see it as a sport. In order to get better you need to repeat and practice. Your brain needs to be recited all this information for long term memory. It’s a hard process, I know, but trust me you’ll get there.
You get what you work for
You won’t have this day again, so make it count.
blushydior
this is nothing but an enhancement of the person already within you. this is not to say you aren’t perfect in your own beautiful way and you need to change your whole self because you’re “not up to par”. i make this post to tell you to never put a limit on your growth because change is constant and the smallest things make the absolute biggest difference. this is an endless self improvement journey where you will make clear of your beautiful qualities buried underneath, embody the person you’ve always wanted to become, and find new lovely sides of yourself in the process. the idea of change, even in the slightest, shouldn’t be feared but instead welcomed. there is nothing better than evolving and being a better person than you were yesterday. remember that you can change at any time. you don’t have to wait until a new year, month, or week and note that it’s never too late to do so. there is no other time than now. this post will always be here for you to look back on. and of course, despite the mentions of dream girl, this post is for EVERYONE.
to start and this is very crucial, ask yourself a series of questions:
what are my deepest values in life? envisioning the dream person i desire to be, do the habits i hold support me on this journey? what are some things i need to let go of that i’ve been putting off? how have i been feeling these past few months? do the people i socialize with inspire & encourage me in my endeavors?
really take your time to think about what you value, ways you can support them and analyze things in your current life.
now that you’ve got the foundation, let’s begin and become the dream girl you want to be.
do right by you. you can’t do right by others if you abandon yourself for the sake of them.
bring out the journal because we are going on a self discovery journey!
what are your goals that you’ve been wanting to achieve? start a business, do better in school and be at the top of your class, getting to places on time, be more open to meeting new people, reading more books a month, being more elegant, gentle, and kind…
what does the dream person in your mind look like? what habits and kind of friends do they have? how do they spend their time? how do they carry themselves?
what are some things you need to let go of in order to successfully embody this person? socializing with toxic people, not having structure in the day, excess social media usage, substance consumption, sleeping in, procrastinating, victimizing, the negative self-talk, gossip, letting people step all over you…
what are some habits you’ll need to cultivate? lessen social media usage, waking up and going to sleep early, eating healthy, exercising, picking up old and new hobbies again, more walks, starting work right away, being kind to yourself…
digital declutter: delete any and all useless apps. most of them are to be real with you. you don’t have to check your influencer’s new posts and vlogs and you will be okay if you miss out on the newest internet trends. for a little more push on letting go of social media, read my post on digital minimalism here.
remember, that this is a self development journey. you can’t and won’t accomplish the goals and habits of the it girl you want to be if you’re on your phone for more than half the day. be raw with yourself. let go of social media.
social group: really take some time to think about the people you hang around with. are they supportive? negative? do they talk bad about others? criminals? are they goal setters and high-achievers? do they support you and your goals? do they hang around with bad people?
the people you socialize with tells a lot about your character. seriously! if you hang out with people who treat others like garbage (for no reason), if THEY knowingly socialize with people who do tons of horrible things, where do YOUR morals lie? yes, they have been nice to you and you’ve known them for years but that excuse begins to fade when you are striving to be a better person and morals come into play. the environment you tolerate will hold you back.
don’t feel bad about doing this. i did at first but it’ll go away, trust me when i say you’ll do so much better.
most importantly, self care: how you carry and treat yourself shows others how to treat you. once you acknowledge what you are worthy of, you will not allow yourself to settle for anything that doesn’t meet your standards and much less allow yourself to tumble back into old, unhealthy ways.
enforce boundaries on yourself and others. get rid of the habits of bashing yourself when you make an honest mistake or your work performance/grades are low, stop saying horrible things when you look in the mirror, stop complaining and staying up at night for unnecessary reasons, damaging your health, stop letting people insult you, quit over explaining yourself.
detox ending note: again, take it easy with yourself. the more you exercise and strengthen your self-discipline, the easier this detox will be for you. you can start by applying a few habits at a time until it’s basically a part of a routine and go on from there but you have to remember to take it seriously in implementing it into your daily routine/life.
tell yourself that you are doing amazing because you are! you are striving to be better you every single day! how is that not admirable? you are always doing your best even if it may not feel like it.
now that you have a clear vision of things even if it’s little! you need to do in order to fully embody your dream self, it’s time to put things into motion.
how can you do this? enforcing self-discipline and setting boundaries.
think of motivation as a power boost at the starting line and your foot pressing on the pedal of your car is discipline, it’s what keeps you going forward on your journey. motivation, as fleeting as it is won’t bring you far but self-discipline will.
DEVELOPING SELF DISCIPLINE
self-discipline: the ability to control one’s feelings and overcome one’s weaknesses; the ability to pursue what one thinks is right despite temptations to abandon it.
boundaries
a line that marks the limits of an area; a dividing line.
a limit of a subject or sphere of activity.
remind yourself of the life you want to live and the person you desire to be, remember that all of your desires have always been within reach. you just have to break out of the barrier you’ve put up for yourself, fight through the fear and the “what if’s” and just do it! the person you wish to be is already within you.
thinking of and wanting to start is one thing but actually starting, no matter how small has already moved mountains you can’t yet see.
WHERE TO START
self-discipline and boundaries go hand in hand. setting healthy boundaries will shine light on the path you want to take by making sure you’re staying protected by actions made by you and other people and discipline keeps you in check so that you can go about your self improvement journey the best that you can!
this can look like…
overcoming the urge to wallow in past failures and instead looking forward to a chance at a new beginning.
putting yourself first. taking care of your mind, body, and soul.
getting out of bed to finish your tasks even if you wanted to sleep in.
correcting yourself when you were slipping up on an old habit without self criticism.
making sure your boundaries allow you to grow and fix them as you seek fit
learning the best ways to say no and yes
being more considerate and kind to yourself and others.
not letting futile thoughts, ideas, and actions hinder your progress.
finally putting forth projects you’ve pushed aside.
picking yourself back up after a difficult time even if it took a while.
more on boundaries here: BOUNDARIES 101
habits to acquire:
thinking of which times you felt down and uplifted and figuring out what contributed to those feelings. avoid habits and situations that don’t serve you and bring in more of what made you feel good about yourself and how you can further enhance that experience.
not rushing your personal journey
having a set routine. morning + night ideas.
standing firm on your boundaries
stop comparing.
becoming a digital minimalist
identifying with old habits and perceptions of yourself
investing in your appearance (because pampering is relaxing!)
not caring about what others think of you
taking care of your mind, body, and soul. tuning into what you need and what is best for you, fully influenced and putting things into motion because it’s what you truly want, not for pleasing others or trying to “fit in”
enjoying stillness
indulging in old and new hobbies every day. make it a priority!
more ideas here!
CONTINUING TO STRENGTHEN DISCIPLINE
how do habits form? how do people get better at what they set their minds to? by figuring out what works for them and what doesn’t, what their roadblocks are and from then on, repetition and consistency.
keep in mind that healing and improvement is subjective. make it work for you so that you are setting yourself up for success. take what you see from posts like these, videos, and books and refine it to make it fit perfectly with how you would like things to go.
take the habits you intend to leave behind and the ones you’d like to acquire and map out how you would go about leaving the past in the past to welcome in the new.
figure out what your roadblocks are. when there comes a time where it’s hard to continue forward on your path, tune into your body and mind. what is it telling you? there is something that is bothering you that needs to be addressed. are you well rested? have you had enough water today? are you overstimulated? are there any illnesses that can easily flare up and be the reason why you’re feeling this way?
don’t beat yourself up for feeling demotivated and unreasonably drained. most of the time, it’s really not the case. you just need to figure out what is going on and address it gently and sometimes you won’t really know what’s going on until later on and that’s okay!
i would always feel drained or overstimulated with my depression, adhd, and chronic fatigue. it would cause me to flare up and enter episodes (depressive and manic). the things i would realize was that it was either caused by: an triggering/traumatic event, intense emotions that didn’t have an outlet, continuous outings. and sometimes flares up will just happen and i began to understand that.
i didn’t blame myself for having illnesses. i just grew aware that what really matters is: i get through it every. single. time. and i will be okay even if i literally felt my world was crashing down on me yet again.
something that can help when dealing with episodes is that when you feel it coming on, prepare yourself so you can get through it even if it makes the experiences just a little bit better by 1%. taking a shower and brushing your teeth, cleaning up your space, gathering snacks and easy to make meals, telling a trusted loved one you won’t be available but might need their support, trying your best to go on walks even if it’s hard, putting on comfortable clothes, etc.
which one works for you? working your way up, going all in or both? it really all depends on what this method applies to. if you think changing your routine by the slightest will be a good step, do it or if you feel confident that deleting all the apps on your phone all at once is something you want to do, go all in.
keep track of your accomplishments. tracking your accomplishments will show how much you’ve done and keep you on your feet! nothing beats the feeling than looking back at all the things you’ve done before heading towards the rest of your goals with your head high. anything is possible. remind yourself that you can do it. sort it to yearly, monthly, and daily to do lists! it’s always the best thing to look at when there are times where you don’t feel like you did “enough”. your effort is more than enough!
and so you take a few days to rest. relaxing, taking a vacation… does this mean you’re being inconsistent? absolutely… not. duh? resting is being productive. putting yourself first IS self care! reward yourself with relaxing days spent by traveling, resting, going out etc. do what makes you happy and be safe. keeping a balance is SUPER important!
“take things slow with yourself. if your body wants to rest, let it rest. let your mind rest as well by letting go all the worries of “why you’re not active”. who cares if you take a slow day? do you know how much you’ve been through? the least you can do for yourself is be comfortable in your own bed without a care in the world. you’ve experienced enough guilt. let yourself be free knowing that you deserve to rest. you deserve moments of stillness. enjoy the now. it’s all we have. we’re not always meant to be up and running. we simply weren’t made that way. there is beauty in stillness, peace, and quiet. don’t put it to shame. instead, let your mind, body, and soul experience more of it.
do things at your own pace. if you think you can get up, brush your teeth and that’s all that you can do for the day, so be it. don’t force yourself to do things you can’t handle. you’ll be doing more harm than good. take it day by day. add an extra task as days go on. do something you believe will be fulfilling like going on a quick walk around the block, going to the store to get a drink, baking a treat, sitting outside for a few minutes at a time.”
— blushydior in be kind to yourself. healing is a journey.
read this with conviction:
“as of this very moment, i am leaving my old and undesired self behind; the past mistakes, the unhealthy habits, how i used to treat myself and the way i allowed others to treat me, and all the pain i have held on to for so long. it’s all gone now. even if i may or may not have a clear vision of the dream person i am now embodying, i will remain open minded and brave into learning and growing each and everyday. i am not my past mistakes nor my trauma. i’m safe and secure now. and because i’m aware of my infinite power of having full control of my reality, i am rewriting my story.”
you are not your past mistakes. you are not the negative words you have been told. you are who you want to be. everything in your world holds absolutely no meaning unless you assign it meaning thus, giving it power. turn a blind eye to things that don’t serve you, put yourself first and watch how you will bloom vibrantly.
NOTHING IS OUT OF REACH. everything you want is already within you, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
GIVE PERFECT A MEANING OF YOUR OWN! you are still an it girl if you make mistakes, you are still a healthy, recovering person with a few very tough days this week.
you are perfect for:
taking it easy
always trying your best even if it doesn’t feel like it
making a mistake and learning from it
telling yourself: “i had a tough day today but it’s okay! i’m going to rest and take it easy. i’m okay. i am always doing my best. there’s nothing to worry about. tomorrow will be an amazing day.”
allowing yourself to cry, feel, and express your thoughts and emotions
putting your need first
using fear as an opportunity to grow
YOU ARE PERFECT LIKE YOU.
REMEMBER: THIS IS A JOURNEY
you will grow at your own pace naturally.
don’t compare yourself to others, they too had a past and obstacles to overcome (and still do!) to get where they are at right now.
don’t rush into things, handling more than you could at once.
don’t beat yourself up for not knowing certain things earlier. everyone learns and realizes things differently.
this is not a race, there’s no routine that is supposed to be one size fits all. this is a self paced journey. you will realize and see things at a different perspective as events unfold, you will outgrow the people around you and the bad habits as you find yourself at a more stable chapter in your life. don’t rush, don’t compare, just keep looking forward.
i have fully embodied my definition of a dream girl/boy/person.
i carry myself with full confidence and elegance.
there is not a day that goes by where i don’t do my best.
i’m beautiful, intelligent, hardworking, kind, and gentle.
i am the best version of myself.
success is inevitable for me. i am successful at everything i do.
i have all of my desired qualities.
i become better and better each and every day!
my self awareness increases every second. i have the most perfect mental diet.
it’s so easy for me to persist in new and beneficial thoughts. flipping thoughts is just way too easy.
i am in full control of my reality. i am fully aware of my potential and i will never let anything or anyone affect me.
“A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.”
— Zen Shin
☆ here is the google doc (and better) version! ☆