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Hi hon, could you talk more about finding my own ‘dream girl archetype’ & creating ‘my personal manifesto’ as you mentioned in this post? 💌🌹

Gladly! Some notes on creating your own dream girl archetype and personal manifesto are below. Lmk if you need anything else x

How To Build Your Own Dream Girl Archetype: 

Reflect on your role models: These can be TV characters, celebrities, public figures, or, even better, those you look up to in real life. What qualities and characteristics about them do you admire and want to emulate? Is it their poise, work ethic, their personal strength, confidence, style, general aesthetic, lifestyle, cultural affiliations, career, and hobbies? Make a list of these people or characters with bullet points under each one. If you find a lot of commonalities and find certain qualities on multiple lists, place them on a separate list – this list will become the framework for your dream girl archetype.

Get introspective: After gaining some inspiration from those you admire, it’s essential to look inside yourself to acknowledge the characteristics and personality traits you like about yourself, your natural talents, skillset, and your motivation for wanting to become your dream girl – this desire for self-growth and perseverance should make it onto the list if you’re still reading this! Think about the compliments you receive, especially those that you regularly get from different people who don’t know each other. I find that these types of comments help us learn the most about how we’re perceived in the world. Add all of these characteristics, personality traits, talents, skillsets, etc. to your list. 

Acknowledge your dark side: Get comfortable with your shadow self. If you have certain traits or habits holding you back from being your ideal self (i.e. people pleasing, self-sabotage, procrastinating, etc.), become curious and reflect on why you engage in these behaviors or uphold this mindset. Strategize ways to unlearn these characteristics and ways you move through the world that no longer serves you. Create a plan to dig yourself out of these self-destructive thought patterns and actions. Read books, speak with a therapist (if you can), and start journaling to come up with creative solutions to make changes in your daily life to prioritize yourself. Set up your environment in ways to help you win. Own your indulgent side - it makes you human. The sooner you align with your guilty pleasures, the better you get at indulging in them strategically. Have a small sweet treat every day if needed. Keep emotional distance from toxic loved ones. Make your feelings about your current hot hookup self-referential. Block out time to watch your favorite show.

Assert an active role in your life: Create healthy habits to make you feel good. Stop craving others’ approval – no one can be as happy for you as you are for yourself when you succeed. It’s okay to remind yourself we’re all a bit narcissistic – it’s human nature. 

Construct your higher self: Once you’ve acknowledged the qualities you need to internalize to become your ideal self, discover the external qualities and habits you need to cultivate to build your dream girl. What does she wear, what’s her career, how does she speak, work through issues, engage in conversation? What are her habits like? Her morning and night routine? What does she read, watch, and listen to? What’s her social life like? How does she spend her leisure time? What does her space look like, her beauty, diet, and self-care routine? What quotes does she live by? Does she know other languages or about certain topics? How do others speak about her? Create as many inspiration boards and lists, journal entries, etc. as you need until you unlock all of these answers. You will know when some new characteristic, routine, or aesthetic resonates. 

How To Write Your Personal Manifesto: 

Essentially, this document (can be a journal entry, notes app entry, Google doc, etc.) is an amalgamation of your values, principles, habits, and boundaries. It’s a written reminder to yourself of who you truly are, decide to be, and promise to yourself to stick by your values no matter who tries to tear you down. 

Create a mission statement of your ideal self and the qualities that validate this narrative. Essentially, practice the law of assumption by creating a series of personally-tailored affirmations that describe your self-concept and the woman you choose to be. 

Write out all of the qualities listed above that you admire about yourself and emulate in your daily life. Affirm this self-concept. Feel free to use specific personal affirmations and attach related behaviors to your self-affirming characteristics (i.e. I make it my mission to show up with class and confidence in every area of my life. I’m mindful of how I speak to others, choose my words carefully – in person or in writing – and consider the feelings of the other person when engaging in conversation. I take my appearance seriously and aim to embody a seductive and alluring presence. I maintain a healthy diet, make almost all of my meals from fresh ingredients, go on long walks daily to take care of my body, tailor my closet with streamlined clothes made of high-quality fabrics that fit my body well, indulge in my makeup and beauty routines daily alongside wearing my signature scent. I’m an intellectual whose dedicated to learning more about the world every day – I read at least 10 pages of psychology, personal development, or a business-related book daily, etc.). 

List out your boundaries and non-negotiables with yourself. Feel free to get specific with your boundaries to include all aspects of your life – with your work, family, friends, intimate relationships, dating, food, style, self-care habits, etc. Validate your needs. Add your ‘why’ to each of these boundaries and priorities to help you internalize them and to motivate yourself to uphold these standards despite any self-doubt or external criticisms. 

Not too long ago I had an anon ask me how to fake it till she makes it in manifesting her luxury lifestyle. I gave a bit of advice (you should read that before finishing this) but I want to elaborate more on a certain aspect that is crucial to obtaining an ideal life: becoming your ideal self. That ask was focused on lifestyle, but what about the self glow-up? That’s where this guide comes in. I see a lot of guides where the OP tells you the type of woman you should become, and it’s usually based on their own idea of what is desirable. This is different. This is a barebones guide that requires you to think hard about yourself and what would satisfy you to live in your own skin. To no longer wish to be anyone else. To be the best version of YOU. Who is the the ideal woman you are aspiring to be?

Here’s how to start:

BUY the 12 Month Dream Girl Guide Planner here

Step 1: describe your dream girl and create a list of 12 essential qualities/skills she has. Things that are controllable by a person themselves, not reliant on another person or location. (Good: she drinks tea every day. Bad: her boyfriend makes tea for her every day)

Step 2: make a list of how you can acquire those qualities

Step 3: dedicate one quality to each month of the year and for every single day of that month, cultivate habits that will make those qualities now belong to you. 30 days is a great amount of time to build a habit that you can continue on with even after the target date has passed. It’s not too long to feel scary but it’s long enough to make really good progress. Plus you won’t feel overwhelmed about doing all of these new things at once. Just one quality at a time :)

Step 4: after 12 months, you will have dedicated 365 days to your own personal growth and transformation and will now emerge a brand new woman.

To make this even easier on you, I will create an example using a mix of things that are about me.

My dream girl is: a beautiful and fit domestic goddess who speaks multiple foreign languages, plays instruments, is a wiz in the kitchen, and has a killer style

12 qualities to create her:

Takes expert care of her outward appearance

Eats healthy and works out every day

Speaks french

Speaks korean

Speaks spanish

Plays piano

Cooks a proper meal every day

Always dresses well no matter what

Keeps her home spic and span

Manages her emotions well to always be kind and composed to others instead of combative and volatile

Is a minimalist

Studies hard in school

(When you make your list of 12 qualities, don’t worry about making them perfectly correspond to a certain month just yet. First, just get them all written down and then you can rearrange it later. For the sake of this, let’s just pretend that mine are in a perfect order as is)

January: takes expert care of her outward appearance

For January, I will spend 31 days focused on beauty. Every single morning and night I will do my skincare routine, a face mask, use my serums and exfoliants (when necessary), and make sure to apply sunscreen. I will get a skincare consultation if needed, I will schedule a dentist appointment or do at home teeth whitening treatments. I will take a bubble bath once a day and always make sure that I’m exfoliated. I will always make time to shave/wax/epilate/whatever and maintain manicured nails and eyebrows. My hair care will be completely on point because my hair will always be deep conditioned, well moisturized, and styled to perfection.

(Keep a log and make sure to do this every single day. You will now be in the habit of taking care of your external appearance and will be used to looking and feeling a certain way)

February: eats healthy and works out every day

For February, I will find a list of healthy breakfasts, lunches, and dinners and make sure to use them as my eating guide. I will watch my calories and eat foods that nourish my body. I will cut out sugary drinks and extra sweets and do a workout for at least 30 minutes every day. I will watch a lot of content on health and fitness to keep me on track and make sure that I know what I’m doing.

(Keep a log and make sure to do this every single day. You will now be in the habit of making and eating healthy foods, have a 30 day workout streak, and will have a new relationship with your health and fitness. Because you have successfully committed a whole month to this lifestyle, it will be easier to keep it going to reach your body goals)

March: speaks French

For March, I will study french every day for at least an hour. I will watch french movies and tv shows, learn grammar and memorize vocabulary. I will always keep my flashcards on an app and study them frequently so that I don’t forget anything. I will find a french language exchange partner online and talk to them everyday so they can correct my mistakes.

(Keep a log and make sure to do this every day. You will now be in the habit of studying a foreign language for a dedicated amount of time each and every day. This will get you to a strong start and make it much easier for you to continue learning the language as time moves forward)

November: is a minimalist

For November I will focus on living a minimalist lifestyle and being intentional with the items I allow into my space. I will go through my whole house and declutter all of the things that I don’t need. I will not buy things this month unless they are essentials to me and my growth. I will watch/read a lot of content on consumerism and try to understand why I own so many things. I will have a better relationship with my possessions and take better care of the things I own so that I won’t need to keep buying new ones.

(Keep a log and make sure to do this every day. You will form a better relationship with your possessions and learn to let go of unimportant things. This will build the habit of being mindful of the things you allow into your space and allowing you to make better buying choices in the future)

You get the idea. So basically you will elaborate on each of the 12 qualities and make it very clear what your daily goals are for that month. The most important thing is to stick to it. You have to build the habit so that it becomes your new normal. This is how you acquire a new lifestyle and persona. You do it every day until it’s your default setting. You don’t call someone an a good student because they got an A one time, right? You call them a good student because they consistently demonstrate the actions that makes one a good student on a daily basis.

“But 2pretty! How can I stick to these things every day? What if I don’t feel like it sometimes?”

It’s all about discipline and consistency. Having your effort correspond to how badly you want something. Focusing on the big picture and sacrificing a little bit of comfort. Choosing to be your most excellent self rather than the easiness of staying the same. Growth is hard! But that’s what makes it worth it.

You all can sit here and read level up posts until you turn blue in the face but the fact of the matter is, The Ideal You can only emerge if you put in the work to become her. I believe in you.

I can’t wait to meet the new you in 12 months. See ya then.

Keep your goals and news to yourself no matter how little or big. You speak too soon and it’ll all go downhill. Trust me on this. People are out there waiting to give you the evil eye. Manifest your success in silence, let your results speak for themselves. No one can touch you once you’ve accomplished what you desired.

How To Be Rid Of Evil Eye

“Should you find yourself in a situation where you think the evil eye has been placed on a loved one, try the following folk remedy. Take a small amount of olive oil to your ancestor altar. Pray that they will conjure any evil eye that may have been placed on your loved one intentionally or unintentionally into the oil.

Place a dish of water over the victim’s head and add some of the oil drop by drop. Look at the patterns it forms. Do any of them look like eyes? (They will jump right out at you if they’re there.) Prick any eyes that you see in the oil with a pin or cut them with scissors. When you’re done, dump the water and oil down the toilet.”

- Excerpt from: "Honoring Your Ancestors: A Guide to Ancestral Veneration" by Mallorie Vaudoise.

There’s so much power in knowing your power. Knowing that you can control what you give your energy to. Knowing that you have the power to create a new reality for yourself. To shape yourself into the person you want to be. To reinvent yourself into the badass that you visualize in your mind. To reach new goals, attain higher levels of success and almost anything you ever dreamed of. Visualize, plan, manifest and take action. Go be amazing. KNOW YOUR POWER.

Let go of what you don’t want. Release those thoughts. Every time you focus on what you don’t want, it’s taking you away from what you do want. Read that again. The internal chatter in your mind is either guiding you towards the life you dream of or a life of unhappiness. Awareness is key, choosing better thoughts is the answer to receiving the life you desire.

You want peace, happiness, success, abundance? That has to be your thought process every moment of everyday. Instead you get stuck in worry, fear, creating dramas in your mind. The only way to succeed is to choose better thoughts. Because with better thoughts come better actions, and with better actions comes a better life.

how to visualize your desires easily:

here’s your daily reminder to visualize the person you want to and will become as soon as you wake up and as soon as you’re about to sleep.

you can do this process through using the 17 second method (steps listed below), guided visualization meditations, or whatever aligns with you.

the 17 second method:

“maintain a thought in your mind for 17 seconds, you can stimulate its energy vibrations. Going further, if you can hold on to the same thought for 68 seconds, the vibrations will rise dramatically and get amplified enough to manifest the thought”

steps:

1. set the mind on a positive note (i recommend listening to affirmations or sound healing to do so)

2. choose what you want to manifest. if you are a beginner, it may be easier to focus on one manifestation at a time.

3. think about the goal you want to manifest for 17 seconds. try to not let your mind wonder, if it does, be gentle with yourself. it is 100% okay!

4. when the 17 second alarm goes off, turn your attention back to your goal. now set a timer for 51 seconds. continue to focus on a sequence of thoughts related to your goal for 51 seconds.

5. let it go. remember: manifestation is a butterfly.

“manifestation is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder”

- quote inspired by nathaniel hawthorne

the guided meditation i used today:

https://youtu.be/6JgMOEINKqw

People mistreating you is not a challenge from the universe for you to prove your worth.

there is a light at the end of whatever darkness you are facing and it is warm and embracing and as nurturing as the sun.

There’s so much power in knowing your power. Knowing that you can control what you give your energy to. Knowing that you have the power to create a new reality for yourself. To shape yourself into the person you want to be. To reinvent yourself into the badass that you visualize in your mind. To reach new goals, attain higher levels of success and almost anything you ever dreamed of. Visualize, plan, manifest and take action. Go be amazing. KNOW YOUR POWER.