All That Bimbo Girl Dinner Girl Math “i’m Too Pretty To Understand The Economy” Passenger Princess

As a Parisian I was so ready to bitch on the Olympics but omfg these are the most entertaining games I have ever seen. So far we have:

Korean shooting lady creating an epidemic of bi panic

51yo way-too-casual shooting guy who might or might not actually be a hitman

Muffin man

Leon Marchand probably being Percy Jackson in disguise

Snoop Dog the n°1 Team USA cheerleader

The skateboarders’s bus going down so all the athletes had skate together through Paris to go to the competition, like a bunch of bffs

Clark Kent of gymnastics

i want to coin a phrase that's the opposite of writer's block. call it the muse's fire hydrant. thirty thousand story ideas are being beamed directly into your brain and if you don't write them all at once you will die.

yeah dirty talk is hot, but how about you command me not to make any noise at all while you fuck me as you get rougher with each time i let even one tiny whimper slip? what about you wrapping your hand more and more tightly around my throat with each thrust until i can’t even make a noise except for my pathetic attempts at gasping for air? what about that???

good things will happen 🧿

things that are meant to be will fall into place 🧿

i fear a lot of ppl confuse “was this character’s death well written and good for the story” with “did i like it, personally”

new four temperaments are clown, 80s, cowboy, and goth.

Reminder to self:

"I'd destroy the world to protect you" but it's a parent/child relationship

love language

i read somewhere that vikings used to gift new brides kittens and immediately thought of viking!simon and a little kitten

big man with small animal? absolutely yes i’m ovulating

c/w: none

you cannot and will not tell me that he will not pick the scrunkliest kitten known to man. little black scruffy thing tucked into his palms and he just puts it in your lap the day after your wedding. mumbles something about tradition before skulking off

he expects you to dump the thing on someone else, not even give little scruff a name. but to his surprise you’re absolutely in love with this little ball of fur. you don’t go anywhere without it, fashioning a little collar for it and speaking to it as if it were your own child

he doesn’t expect you to be in tears when you tell him that the cat didn’t come home last night :( that you’re worried a wolf got to it and you just miss your baby!

huffs and puffs as he hunts around the dark forest, looking for a kitten who may as well be invisible. breathes a sigh of relief when he finds the thing handing on a tree branch. he’d grab it by the scruff before beginning his trek back home,

“ya gave your mum a right scare. don’t do that again.” he’d grunt to the cat who just meows right back at him, tail swishing in the air