I Made A Kin List CUZ IM COOL

I'm sorry I'm letting this affect my performance in art, as I mentioned in the tags in the last reblog I'll do my best to get literally anything done

Well I'm working on some Persona Ocs so if that will satisfy yall I'll gladly show em off!

If not I'll stick to the fanart, as an apology really

So uh

Oops

Okay, the other 2 r in progress but like, I just had a hard time choosing what prompts I wanted to do so

I just picked an old one to do lol,

But YEAH day 1

Leaf :)

Aaaaa happy pride month! 💕💕💕🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

And with every thing going on in the world, let’s all remember:

•Lgbtq+ lives matter

•Black mlm lives matter

•Black wlw lives matter

•black trans lives matter

•lgbtq+ Muslim lives matter

Feel free to add on :)

AHDGEIFHI H I HI- got tagged!!!!! In a thing!!!!!!! By both @rkgk-arts and @itsbluesaint!!!!!!! Wild!!!!!!!!!!

So *ahem* rules are Tag 9 People you would like to get to know or Talk with more, so uh yeah! Let's get down to the nitty gritty of post! I'll put it under a read more cuz I talk a lot and if some of yall ain't interested, I'll spare u the scroll.

Last Book Read:

I uh, can't really remember which book I picked up last, the name at least. SO instead I'll you a book I last read to the fullest! Which I believe to be Red, White, and Royal Blue by Casey Mcquiston.

A cheesy one definitely, I mainly picked it up cuz I had some... heavy hitters in my library and I wanted to just have a chill one I can read, though I was definitely back and forth on it cuz book reviews are literally the most polarizing things ever holy shit. As for the book itself, I thought it was ok, it did its job as a chill read and I was entertained! Nothing in particular to write home about, except maybe the premise, and the way the author handled that concept was a bold ass move. So overall, 4.5/10 I don't feel anything in particular for it but I appreciate what it did regardless.

Last Movie Seen:

So uhhhh.... last one I watched in full was Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness... and I didn't like it? Please don't kill me but, I just think it kinda flopped narrative wise, and i had some problems with the choices the writers made in regards to America and a liiiiil bit Wanda, and the Illuminati... yeah that one was a weird one. It kinda felt like they were biting off more then they could chew in terms of all the ideas they had for the movie, felt unorganized, especially when they were forced to cut some of those ideas short in order to pad for time. So a 3/10 for me, the theater I watched it in had their volume fucking blasted, so when that sound guy opened his mouth... not fun.

Last Song Heard:

This one is nice n short! Cast Me a Spell by Mili and Promise of Wizard. Funky existential magic song, what can I say? 7/10

Now onto the TAGGING part... here we go!

@allieebobo ..... I know no one else I'd like to speak to more

I could just tag random people but given the rules that doesn't sit right with so I'll uh, just end it here

Thank u for tagging me!!!!! Sorry if this was a bit anticlimactic

I’ve been thinking about the @lemonade-if game for the last couple of days, and I wanted to draw some of the mcs I’ve seen on the blog so the mcs and their creators:

Kaoru Tachibana- @little-leech-boy

Sonya Paige and Francesca D’Amore- @lorelaibeckons

Sumire Mochizuki- @rabidrobopop

Mikazuki Tenjin- @enderlilly

Kiyoko Kuronuma- @sulkcubus

I made a vid on tiktokkk that I really like so here we r lol

(Not tumblr)

😳

Mountain Tim I labba uuuu

Boba Fett fans rise up

So, Unus and Annus are reaching the last hour of existence, and they said that if we want, we could write our last words to them and our aspirations, and.... I wanna do it

I'm taking this stupidly seriously but this, this channel became important to me, it made me expand my thoughts on what I thought death was to me and what my life is to me

But here we go

I haven't been here for the beginning, I didnt watch every video and I never bought merch, but regardless this channel and these videos worked there way into my thoughts, and this livestream made me stupid sentimental. My internet currently is shitting itself and I might not see the end properly, but that's ok.

Death to me, is the end

That's it, I dont know if there is an after and I dont care, I dont fear the emotions and pain I might feel facing my demise but I do fear one thing. I fear of what my death will do to the world i leave behind.

Will it change? Will it mourn? Will it rejoice??? Or will absolutely nothing happen, and time keeps moving forward as it does. More importantly however, how would the people I love remember me? After death I will be gone and over, there wont be anything left of me besides the legacy I have left and the memory people hold of me, so I cant help but think of the only thing I CAN think of involving my demise. But this is egotistical of me is it not? Death is normal, and I am not special for thinking this way, I am going to die and so will you guys. But in all honesty I cannot think of any other way to perceive my death, I cannot for the life of me think of anything else to say about it.

That's also ok, I'm alive

I'll never understand my death as long as I live.

But I obsess so much, about what will happen after I die, but I try not to think about what will happen as I continue to live.

I am young, and I am childish, I am naive and I am hopeful.

I only really truly desire one thing in my life more than anything, even if it may change over time.

I want to make a story I love, and characters whom can share my thoughts and feelings, in their own unique experiences, and become their own people from them as well. I want to create art that would do them justice and I want to love it so, so, so much

I know I dont draw as much as want, I should not force myself to per say, but I find it difficult to find motive to.

At this moment that is my only goal in my life, I just want to love what I create

I will one day

Even if I may die before I create such a story, I will love my art, I do love it now

I love it because I CREATED it

I made it, I birthed something simply because I wanted to, because its fun

And I really, really wish I could see that everyday.

But I do not, and that's ok, that's ok

Its ok

This channel taught me to, learn what it is that I value about my life and my death, and because I overthink MANY things this was not always a good thing lol

It will die soon, and that's ok

But that does not mean I will not feel, grief

No matter how much or little that grief may be.

So what shall I do? When it does? When it dies 20 minutes from now as I'm writing this?

Well I'll cry

I'll cry, and cry and cry

Because it is what I can do

.

I don't know what my life will be like, I cant find the words to describe what I think of it as, as of writing this at least.

But

But I

I want to live

I AM living

I AM ALIVE

and I'm so glad that I am, I used to think living was a burden, I used to hate that fact

But I'm still here, I'm still breathing and I'm so

I'm so relieved, that I chose to stay alive.

And I hope that those who are reading this feel that too, maybe not today or tomorrow, but soon.

Soon.

Because it is, such an amazing thing to be here, with you, and with my family and friends, and with strangers I'll never meet

..

This has gone in a while

This is clearly important to me so I wanted to be transparent in my feelings. I dont know how u all will react to this and I dont know if you will care.

But that's okay, you dont need to take anything from this.

Well

Except for one thing.

Momento Mori, Remember Death

Remember Life

Unus Annus

Thank you so much for reading my rambles about my existence, thank you so much

I'm glad you are alive reading this as well

I'm glad we exist :)

Okay originally this was gonna be WAY fucking longer cuz I like to be efficient in my ramblings, however I accidentally posted it unfinished, panicked, and deleted it

So take 2

I'm scared of posting this, not because I'll be hated for saying my beliefs but that does play a small part in it, I'm scared of the possibility I wont be taken seriously, and that I will just cause more harm than good in telling the internet what's on my mind.

However people r saying not to be silent, so I won't

George Floyd was a man whom was killed during an attempted arrest for attempting to purchase goods with counterfeit money by officers, one of which knelt on his neck while he was handcuffed. Though it is being investigated on whether or not he was killed due to suffocation or toxins in his system due to alcohol consumption or allegedly drugs, the officer played a part in his death due to his reckless and stupid stunt, more info can be found here, though if this is not sufficient will gladly scour the internet more for more info. But as we all know his tragic death caused outrage.

At first the protests started peacefully as per usual, but six days after they started a man was killed by national guard when involved in a angry confrontation, in an attempt to disperse the crowds. Again this goes into a little more detail.

Now this is a very gross simplification of the problem at large, and while I'm sure most of us know about it I just like to lay down the issue before getting to the meat and potatoes of this post, the views and opinions of the poster.

Honestly? I'm conflicted, I tried, I really did try to just choose one side (BLM) because my usual neutral stand may not actually do anything at the moment. But I couldn't, there's too many factors on each side to consider, and while I'll admit I'm very biased and mostly agree with the views of BLM, I also didnt like the idea of writing the officers off as,, well officers.

I think police should be held up to their actions like everyone else, I think their definitely needs to be some changes to the organization at large, but I dont like dehumanizing every officer and just saying all of them are ruthless pigs. Whether we all like it or not those are people too, good and bad, and generalizing them, to me, doesnt really contribute anything positive to the problem at hand.

But I get why were doing it.

Were angry, and tired, and just upset that this kind of shit just keeps fucking happening, hell I'm fucking pissed at then myself, I trusted this power to uphold its word and be an agent of justice for us all and it betrayed me, AGAIN. Of course I'm fucking pissed.

But I'm scared too

I'm scared that the police will just keep following their orders and just keep acting on the offensive, I'm scared this will turn into another bloodbath due to racial tension, I'm scared because I want to believe that we've learned from those incidents and want something better.

And I do

In my point of view, humanity IS the world, we all made it and we all change it and ourselves with it, at the moment my world is America since I live here and I've never had an opportunity to go anywhere else. But I want to believe in us and so I do, I'm not trying to be holier than thou, and like I said I dont have an answer for this, I'm only one person.

So that does beg the question on why I made this dumb little tumblr post

My personal beliefs are over all neural, I get it, they dont particularly contribute to anything but their mine, and i wanted to say something about this kinda shit for once.

This has probably been all over the place, and I apologize if it makes little sense, I dont like to say one thing about a big issue like this so I tend to ramble. If there are glaring problematic issues with my point of view feel free to say so! I dont expect you guys to agree with me, but I do appreciate hearing your guys view on the matter as well!

Afterall, if anyone can change the world its the world, and that means everyone of us