I'm An Adult But I Still Think Penis Humor Is Funny Which Is Why My Eldritch Horror Story Has A Dick

Bob’s Burgers official trailer

Autism thing i hate that it’s considered rude to not like a food and not want to eat it. And i hate that i have to be all apologetic about it instead of people just understanding that foods just aren’t for everyone and a person not wanting to eat something isn’t an insult to anyone’s cooking

goth women. you agree. regoth

Things that make me (autistic and goth) a vampire:

Sun? No, thank you. Instant kill.

Counting everything. Please don't throw rice at me.

Invite me directly. "You're always invited". No, I have to stand at your door and you have to say "Come in", else I can't physically enter.

Did someone eat garlic like 5 days ago? I can tell.

You don't want to be informed for three hours about the different sounds bats make?

Black cloths. Everything else is too overstimulating.

Very formal and rigid way of speaking and behaving, almost like a dark lord in 1894.

"I've recently started this hobby... wait, this was a decade ago?"

Summary of my favourite autism tweets

the villagers: OH MY GOD GET OUT OF HERE ITS A DRAGON ATTACK HES BURNING DOWN THE WHOLE VILLAGE

me noticing the "dragon" actually only has 2 hind legs instead of 4 legs: thats actually a w-

*flames engulf me completely*

Beetlejuice (1988)

babygirl ur upset stomach is cuz chemical reaction of food in yo belly created 8 demon chariot riders and they rode off each into one cardinal + intercardinal direction to go light beacons in nightmare towers etcetera

House MD depicts an autistic who has gotten insanely good at reading people and is just in too much pain to use it for social engineering much beyond his weird little pranks and machinations. my dad is this type of autist, i think of it as the Frasier Crane type as opposed to the Star Trek type. you know. capable of being jocular, jovial, charming, even seductive, but it requires so much bandwidth its still extremely taxing. i have been telling you on this blog for ten years that it is in your best interests to become jocular. it will stun you how much better you are at reading people than the majority of neurotypicals. there's no reason for them to get good at it when they dont even know what there is to get good at. microexpressions are real and i can see them

One single leaf turns orange

Me: