Shoutout To All My Fellow Smut Enjoyers

Dear humanity,

Please Help Me My Son May Die at Any Moment.

I'm Amal, a mother of three children, living under the weight of the genocide taking place in Gaza. 🍉

My son is suffering from a severe and life-threatening injury after being shot by Israeli drones. He urgently needs medical treatment outside Gaza.

Time is running out, and we are facing a critical situation. I am asking for your generosity to help us save him either through a donation or by sharing this urgent plea with others

I beg you, i kiss your feet, to help my son. My son may die at any moment

I lost most of my family. I'm afraid to lose my son too 🥺 🥺

Mohammed deserves to live a happy and healthy life, just like every other child on this earth.

So I humbly ask you to donate even a little or at least reblog this appeal.

Please Donate now:👇

https://gofund.me/d272a0d1

.

Forget the face reveal, I'm more entertained by the notion that the FBI informed Dream there was a threat on his life and he thought it was funny

YOU DISTRACT ME

nsfw!

george x male!reader ( was tempted to just write 'reader with a dick).

also! this was a request, hope you like it @simonverses

MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DNI!

cw: porn lol, anal sex, blowjob, fingering, kind of dry humping, slightly dumbification, praise kink, overstimulation, edging, kind of switch!george, brat!george, brat tamer!reader, dom!reader, pet names, dirty talk .

GEORGE loved to stare at you. You were just pretty to look at. He felt like he was in a sort of trance every time he laid his eyes on your figure laying on his bed while playing on your phone.

You had no pants on, leaving you with your dark blue boxers and his white shirt on, and he couldn't help but stare. You were by no means distracted by his gaze, too occupied with your game to even notice the brown eyes of your boyfriend that were filled with lust.

George however, just watched as you huffed and grunted lowly whenever something happened, and before he knew it, his dick was hard and his screen flashed with the usual 'You died!'. Quickly, he logged off and got out of the chair, walking towards his bed and crawling on top of you, slowly massaging your shoulders and back.

You groaned, pleased with the feeling of George's hands massaging your body and turned off your phone, enjoying George's soft kisses that he started to shower your neck with.

"God you're so tense, all because of that stupid game." George mumbled and you chuckled, rolling your eyes. "Are you really saying this to me? You?" You teased and he shrugged his shoulders, a teasing grin on his face. "Maybe."

You huffed a laugh before groaning as his hands went further down your back and to your ass, slowly massaging each cheek, making you smirk lazily. "Oh, you're horny pretty boy?" You mumbled with your eyes closed. He chuckled, still squeezing your cheeks in his hands "Maybe," He said, biting your upper shoulder softly before he started to trail his mouth lower, kissing every inch of your skin.

You smiled, enjoying the attention until you felt your boxer slowly being pulled down. "Do you want to get punished so badly, pretty boy?" You said, swallowing dry as you felt George's fingers moving closer to your hole. "Shhh." He only whispered in your ear, but you weren't having it.

With a fast movement, you turned around, your hands going to George hips as if it was their designated place. You squeezed his hips as if it was your birth right to have such a pretty and good boyfriend straddling you, just waiting for one word from you to do something, anything.

You raised your eyebrows, looking at him with a small smirk as you slowly started to move his waist against yours, enjoying the feeling of his already hard dick against yours. He closed his eyes, moving his hands to take off his shirt before he looked back at you, placing his hands on your chest.

"Why are you so bold today, pretty? Mhm?" You whispered, raising one hand to grip the back of his neck and moving his face closer to yours. He rolled his eyes, but his pace increased as he grinded his hips against yours without stopping. "Why are you so curious baby? Can't I want to fuck my pretty boyfriend for once?" He mocked, raising an eyebrow at you and making you chuckle.

"God pretty, you don't even understand how much fun I'm gonna have with you if you don't stop being such a bratty baby." You teased, moving your hand around his neck and squeezing slightly. His breath inched, and you could already see his ears turning red from blushing.

"Aw are you blushing, pretty? Am I making you flustered?" You mumbled, using your other hand to squeeze his cock over his boxer, chuckling when you saw a small wet spot on them. "My baby is so horny he can't even control himself, right pretty? You're just so horny that you forgot that I don't like brats. " You said, almost in a patronising tone.

He squeezed his eyes shut, not making a sound as you slowly started to trail your hand up and down his covered dick, going to a place so slow that George considered impossible to reach. A whine left his mouth the moment you squeezed his head, from which he was sure was already leaking pre-cum.

"Look at you, I barely touched you and you're ready to come. You're so fucking needy, pretty." You said, watching with amusement when George whined again, his eyes glossed over with lust as they stared right into yours.

"Come on pretty, get on your knees so I can show you what happens when you want to be a brat." He merely nodded, slowly moving down until his mouth hovered your clothed dick. With a shaky hand, George pulled down your boxer, and licked his lips when he saw your dick.

He wrapped his hands around your dick, slowly moving up and down while you threw your head back, enjoying the sensations his warm hands around his dick sent through your body. You placed your hand over his cheek, caressing his face as he looked up at you and you gave him a small smile that he sent back.

With that, you started to grin, moving your hand towards his mouth, that he immediately opened, and almost shoved your thumb in his mouth while he squeezed your dick tighter. He swirled his tongue around your thumb, closing his eyes as he started to move his hips against the mattress.

"I believe you're ready Georgie, don't you think?" You teased, pushing your thumb down his tongue, making him open his mouth before you used your other hand to put your dick in front of George's mouth. He opened his eyes for a second, just to look at you before he closed them again and took all of your length in his mouth. You breathed out a shaky moan, enjoying the feeling of his warm mouth around your cock as he started to move his head up and down while his hand went towards your balls, massaging them. You started to raise your hips, slightly thrusting inside George's mouth and you moved your fingers through his brown hair, occasionally tugging them.

"You're doing such a good job baby. Taking me- Ahh! in your mouth so well…" You said, biting your lip. In response, George twirled his tongue around the head, getting a taste of pre-cum that made him want to moan out your name. Feeling your orgasm approaching, you tugged George's hair, effectively moving his face away from your cocka and making him look at you with an almost annoyed expression on his face.

"Come on, I want your ass, pretty. " You ordered, playfully tugging his hair again. George nodded, wasting no time to get out of his pants and boxers while looking directly at you. "How do you want it baby? Ass up face down?" You asked, sitting up just to kiss him slowly and passionately before you pulled away, biting his lower lip. "Yeah." George just mumbled, feeling himself get incredibly hard at your words alone as he started to turn around.

You chuckled, shaking your head and placing your hands on his back, pushing him on the mattress. "Where are your manners, pretty? When you want something…you ask please." You mumbled into his ear, grinning when you heard his breath inch in his throat as you placed your hand on his asscheeks, slowly making your way towards his hole. You first used one finger, just to tease him a little.

"Come on Georgie, say please." You teased, inserting one finger in his hole and, without wasting a second, you started to move the finger inside of him. Slowly pulling it out before slamming it inside of him again. "Please…" He whispered, eyes closed and fists clenching the bed sheets under him. "Please what? Come on, use your words, pretty." You mocked, adding another finger inside of him as he gasped, eyes flying open. "Please fuck me." He whispered, a red tint spreading all over his cheeks that made you smile cheekily. Lowering yourself, you quickly gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"See? You're such a good boy when you use your manners." You teased, getting a small scoff from him that made you chuckle. "Love you baby." You whispered before pulling away, completely removing your fingers from his ass. "Wh-What! Hey!" George mumbled, gasping as he suddenly felt the cold. You laughed, opening a drawer of his desk to take the lube and a condom, smirking slightly at George's offended face. "What? You wanted to be fucked baby, that's what you're gonna get." You said, wasting no time to sit on the bed and pouring some lube on your hand before using the other to put on the condom.

You started to finger George again, leaning down to leave small kisses, love bites and hickeys on his neck and back. He groaned, pushing his raised hips against your hand, wanting more friction. "Patience, pretty. I'll make you cum so hard on my cock alone that you will beg me to stop." You said, leaving a kiss on his shoulder as he shuddered under you, a small moan leaving his rosy and slightly bigger lips, due to all the times he bit them in the last hour. Another four minutes and three fingers, you deemed him as ready to take you. You used your free hand to jerk you off quickly, your erection quickly coming back as you got ready to fuck your pretty boyfriend.

"Ready?" You asked, taking your fingers off of him and replacing them with your dick, not even waiting for George to answer you. You slammed yourself inside of him, squeezing your eyes shut as your hips involuntarily jerked forward at the feeling of George's warmth around you. George however, let out one of the rare loud moans he ever made, biting the bed sheets at the familiar pain of being stretched by you. Even if it wasn't even close to being the first time you guys had sex, George still felt a little sting whenever you penetrated him, even after one year of relationship. "God you're so fucking tight, pretty. Always squeezing me so good." You said, moaning.

George felt his dick twitch under him at the praise, and let out a small sound to make you understand that he wanted you to move. "You want more?" You mumbled, smiling as George immediately nodded his head. With his consent, you started to move your hips. Slowly at first, and then pulled almost all the way out before slamming yourself inside of him again. "Fuck baby, you feels so good." You praised, moaning as he squeezed you even more. You kept your rhythm, not slowing down or picking up speed, wanting to first make George reach his own release before yours hit you completely.

You felt him move under you, and you slowed down, frowning as you thought the moan he just let out was a sign that he was enjoying it. "Everything good baby?" You said, your thrust coming to a stop. He nodded, but there was a bit of discomfort on his face. "What is it, Georgie? Was I going too hard?" You asked, worried you might have hurt him. He immediately shook his head, blushing red, but still refusing to meet your eyes. " I want to see you." He mumbled, readjusting a little.

You cooed, but slowly removed yourself from him and turned him around. "Wanted to be a pillow princess?" You teased, raising his legs to put them over your shoulders as George breathed out shakily, his eyes roaming from your face, to your chest and then to your hips. When you noticed it, you wasted no time to slam yourself back inside of his hole, grinning to yourself as he let out a moan and his pretty brown eyes widened, hands quickly gripping your body as if you were the only one thing to keep him sane.

"Aw, so much better right?" You teased, grinning as your skin slapped against his, as his legs circled your head, tugging you closer, as if he wanted… "More!". He breathed out, eyes shining with unleashed tears and lust as they met yours (E/C).

And you gave him more, while showering him with praises as his cock twitched against his stomach before he came untouched. But you didn't stop there, no, you kept your promise, still fucking him until he started to blab nonsense, until all he could think of was you while you drove yourself crazy, edging yourself until George started to beg you to cum, his hands reaching your shoulders to yank you towards him.

He slammed his lips against yours, his tongue making its way inside your mouth before he pulled away, leaving you breathless as he kept kissing your jaw and neck, until you felt his warm breath against your ear as he breathed out a single word, a word that you followed as if he ordered you. "Come."

Throwing your head back, your hips met his with less force as the force of the orgasm made you almost shake. George gave you a breathy chuckle when you lowered your whole body upon his, placing various kisses on his neck before you rested your head there. "Fuck baby, you were amazing. " You mumbled, closing your eyes briefly as George only smiled, raising his hand to play with your hair that was stuck on your forehead due to the sweat that covered both of your bodies.

this gif...this gif right here does something to me...

"my pretty baby"

dream x gender neutral reader

minors and ageless blogs DNI!

TW: smut lol, praise kink, pet names, overstimulation i think?, mostly soft and fluffy sex, cursing, dom/sub dynamics. softdom!dream, sub!reader.

disclaimer: english is not my first language, i apologies if there are any mistakes and please be nice this is my first post <3.

YOU felt a tear slide down your cheek as Dream trusted back inside you and you let out a small whimper. It felt great, he was great, it was just...a bit too much.

As if he noticed your slight discomfort, Dream slowed down, taking his time to kiss your whole face, starting from your forehead to your jaw and then moving to your neck. He gazed up to you, a smile tugging on his own lips as his big green eyes locked with your E/C eyes. He kissed your lips, and you didn't waste time and kissed him back.

"Everything ok baby?" He mumbled, tracing small circles on your inner thigh and you felt yourself melt as he watched you with that soft smile. You nodded, Dream kissed you again as he thrusted back inside of you, this time more gentle and slower than before.

The friction made you moan in his mouth, but he only chuckled and kept going, his thrust picking up a more consistent rhythm. Dream pulled away from your lips and groaned, eyes closed from the pleasure and hair falling over his forehead. "You feel so good baby, sooo good." He mumbled, squeezing softly your hip as moans escaped your lips at his praise.

"So pretty, you look so pretty like this." He pecked your lips again, effectively silencing the loud cry that left your mouth.

"Dream please-!" You whimpered, a desperate moan following right after. He smiled at you softly, still thrusting in you and he nodded, his fingers making their way to your sex to work you through your orgasm. "You're doing so good, my pretty n/n. " He whispered in your ear just as you squeezed your eyes shut, feeling a pressure building up in your stomach.

"Can I- Can I please come?" You asked breathless, your eyes searching his green ones. He groaned at your tone, but nodded nonetheless, moving his fingers faster to please you. "Go on, you look so pretty when you cum." He moaned out, throwing his head back as he felt his own orgasm getting closer.

The pressure in your stomach quickly grew, and with a moan you didn't bothered to hide you felt yourself coming. He grunted, feeling you clench around his dick, and squeezed your hips. "You look beautiful like this, my pretty baby." He said, a soft smile on his face as he kept fucking you through your orgasm.

The tears gathered again in the corners of your eyes, but you squeezed them shut as you felt yourself coming again. "Fuck." Dream groaned, his thrust now losing their rhythm as he also came inside of you.

You moaned again, eyes rolled back from the pleasure while Dream kissed your neck softly. "You sound so pretty baby, I love hearing you moan for me." He breathed out, slowly stopping to thrust before pulling out and taking off the condom from his dick.

He lied next to you for a few minutes, arms wrapped around you as he kissed your forehead and whispered in your ear how good you were. He then pulled away, getting up and taking a pair of new boxer before walking to the bathroom connected to his room. You felt your eyes becoming heavier, but you opened them when you felt something cold and wet between your legs. You made eye contact with Dream who gently cleaned you up, holding a wet towel in one of his hands, and in the other one of his shirts and underwear for you to wear. He helped you get dressed before slipping in the bed and covering both of you with the heavy covers of the bed.

Dream wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you closer while you placed your head on his chest and closed your eyes. He kissed your forehead one last time before he whispered you goodnight and you mumbled one back.

[3k] too many shots and a bet leads to a very interesting night out. it's just a shame neither of them can remember it and the whole world is discovering the details alongside with them.

.

RING! RING!

The first thing you were painfully aware of was the annoying shrill of your phone echoing from some distant corner of the room. 

RING! RING!

The second thing was the fact you had forgotten to close the blinds last night, meaning the blinding rays of the Nevada sun were doing their best job in dragging you out of your comforting slumber like irritating parasites. 

RING! RING!

And the third thing was that whoever was trying to call you was seemingly very insistent to get in contact with you, if the three calls in a row (that you were so far aware of) were anything to go by.

RING! RING!

“Oh my god,” you groaned as you pulled the edges of the pillow over your ears, hoping it would muffle the ringing shrills. But when the phone continued to ring and the noise only seemed to get louder, you were forced to throw your hand out and blindly try to grasp the cursed device in hopes of making the noise stop. 

Your fingers wrapped around the buzzing phone, your eyes still firmly kept shut as you kept tapping the screen until the ringing stopped before you brought it to your ear. “You better have a good fucking reason for calling me.”

“I hope you are doing something you enjoy.”

You frowned, your brain taking a few moments to process the voice coming through. “Arthur?” 

“Like, I hope you are fulfilling your lifelong wish right now.” 

“What the fuck are you on about?” You grumbled, exhaustion hitting your body just as badly as the rays of sunlight shining through the open blinds were. “It’s too early for your riddles.”

“I am just saying that I think you should be doing something you love before Charles kills you.” 

You let out a non-committing hum. “And why would he kill me?” 

“Many reasons but I think getting married in Vegas last night is easily the top of the list right now.”

Your eyes shot open when you heard the words leave Arthur’s mouth. It felt like ice had doused your entire body as you quickly sat up in the hotel bed, now painfully aware of the pounding headache that only tequila could give you. 

“WHAT?”

“Congrats, by the way. I do pity the poor guy you locked up though.” 

Now painfully aware of the situation, your eyes grabbing onto any detail that would hopefully prove your brother wrong. Unfortunately, all you seemed to find was evidence that he was telling the truth if the white dress, the horribly large costume jewelry ring on your finger and the abandoned veil with ‘NEW BRIDE’ on the floor were anything to go by. 

“Oh my fucking god,” you breathed out, feeling though as you were going to empty your stomach’s contents any moment now. “How do you know? Why didn’t you stop me?!” 

“I wasn’t with you! I just opened Twitter and found pictures of my sister outside a wedding chapel and all over some random guy!”

“I married a stranger,” you hissed out, your lips parting in shock. Tequila made you do many questionable things, but even this was bad for you. 

“He’s your husband, it’s a bit offensive to call him a stranger.”

“Arthur, I swear to god—” You cut yourself off as your eyes fell on the large lump in the bed next to you. It took you an embarrassingly long time to realise it was another human. It took you even longer to tear your eyes away from the cheap suit he was wearing before you looked up at his face. “Oh my fucking god.”

“What?”

“Charles is going to kill me,” you breathed out, your heart pounding like it was lodged in your throat. 

“Yes, we established that when I called you—”

“Charles is going to kill me when he finds out I married Max,” you continued, lost in your own daze that you barely acknowledge your spluttering brother on the other side of the phone.

“YOU MARRIED MAX VERSTAPPEN?!” 

Unfortunately for Arthur’s sake, you quickly hung up the phone. You could barely process the fact the Dutch driver was currently passed out on the bed next to you, let alone doing so with your brother screeching in your ear the whole time. The phone was abandoned on the bed as you stared at the Dutchman, your brain working on overdrive as you tried to work out what to do next. 

So, you did what any reasonable person would do and shoved him off the bed. 

“OW!” 

You froze for a moment before you crawled over to the other side of the bed, peaking over the edge and down at Max who was currently groaning on the floor from his impromptu wake up call. 

“What the fuck was that about?” He grumbled, blinking a few times before he realised who was hovering over him. “What the fuck are you doing in my hotel room?” 

“This is actually my hotel room,” you replied. 

“Oh,” he muttered. “Then, what the fuck am I doing in your hotel room?”

“Well, it’s what a married couple do,” you commented. 

Max’s brows furrowed together. “What?”

You lifted your left hand, the ring now on display and you could practically see the cogs turning in his head before the realisation hit him. “Do you think this counts as our honeymoon?” 

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” 

...

...

“How did this happen?” 

“Tequila,” you muttered with your nose scrunched in disgust as you watched the Dutchman begin to pace the hotel room. If you cared enough, you would be concerned about him wearing down the carpet. Though as of the current moment, your priorities were currently elsewhere. 

Max turned to look down at the certificate he had found stranded beside your veil on the floor, your names and signatures clearly printed on the piece of paper—which took out the small piece of hope that this was just some elaborate prank set up by Arthur.

“How did we get that drunk though?” Max questioned, his brows furrowed together. If he wasn’t so confused, he would be more embarrassed at the fact he clearly couldn’t handle his alcohol as well as he once could. 

“Well, it’s your fault,” you commented casually, which had the boy whirling around to face you. 

“How is this my fault?” Max scoffed.

“You made the bet!” 

Max’s frown deepened. “What bet?”

“At the hotel bar,” you stated like it was a basic fact he should have remembered. “When I bumped into you—”

“We bumped into each other,” Max chided. 

“—you were the one to suggest shots,” you pointed out.

Max gave you a look. “How is that a bet?” 

“Because you said I couldn’t outdrink you. I said you would be a sore loser. And then you bought us ten shots each.” 

He blinked. “Huh.” 

“I’m pretty sure it was also your idea to go to another bar afterwards when we got kicked out the hotel bar,” you said in a sing-song voice.

Max scoffed. “Absolutely not. You were the one that said only losers go to bed after one bar.” 

You shrugged. “I stand by it.”

Max let out a laugh, a little breathless like he was trying to hide it. He shook his head, glancing down at the certificate one more time before shrugging. “It’s not really that bad, to be honest. A bit embarrassing, but what people don’t know won’t hurt them.”

Your expression turned sheepish. “About that…”

“Who knows?” He asked in a blunt voice. 

“Well, Arthur knows,” you started. 

“That’s not that bad,” Max scoffed, his shoulders relaxing. “Wait. Charles doesn’t know, does he?”

“Not yet,” you said before quickly continuing. “But he probably will because the paparazzi caught us last night and now the pictures are all over the internet.” 

Max blinked. “AND YOU DIDN’T THINK TO START WITH THAT?” 

“You’re grumpy when you wake up!” You defended, watching as the boy rolled his eyes at you.

“The whole world thinks we are married!” Max countered before sputtering out a laugh. “Well, we are married. Or we aren’t. I’m still not totally sure but I don’t need your brother chopping off my balls over it!”

“He wouldn’t!”

Max shot you a look.

“Okay, he would,” you grimaced before giving him a shaky smile. “But he doesn’t know yet so we should be in the clear—”

BUZZ! BUZZ! BUZZ!

...

...

“Okay, I have good news and bad news.” 

Max looked at you expectantly. “And?” 

“Bad news: Charles now knows,” you said with a shaky smile. “Good news: he doesn’t know it’s you!” 

Max pressed his fingers into his temples, trying to rub soothing circles. “Fucking hell.” 

“But also bad news: he is coming here right now as we speak so we should probably—” You started, fully set on grabbing what you needed and hiding out somewhere else in the hotel until Charles calmed down. However, your plans were put on hold when you heard a groan from the bathroom. 

“CAN YOU BOTH PLEASE SHUT UP?”

Your gaze caught Max’s as you stared at each other, both with expressions mixed between confusion and surprise. A few seconds passed before you were both clambering off the bed, heading towards the bathroom where you threw the door open and scrambled to turn on the light before you both froze in the doorway at the sight in front of you.

“Now that was unnecessary.” 

You gaped at the sight of Yuki curled up in the bathtub, dressed in a similar looking suit to the one Max was wearing along with what you were certain was the shower curtain placed over him like a blanket. He had a pillow behind his head and sunglasses over his eyes, and for all intents and purposes, he looked fairly comfortable. 

“Oh my god,” you breathed out. “I married two drivers last night?!”

“I hope you at least married me before Yuki,” Max grumbled, only to let out a small wince when you elbowed him. “God, you’re a difficult wife.” 

“Kinda going through something,” you snapped back before your eyes moved back to the Japanese driver. “I can’t believe I married you and Yuki.”

The driver in the tub let out a scoff mixed with a laugh. “Please, you didn’t marry me. You’re not my type.”

You blinked, unsure whether or not you should have been offended by his comment. 

“The ring on your finger says otherwise, mate,” Max commented, the ring a matching one with the one that was currently on your left hand.

“I married someone but not you,” Yuki said as he waved you off, nuzzling his face back into the pillow. “And our wedding was much classier than yours.”

“I—” You frowned. “You remember?” 

“Yeah, you said you wanted witnesses,” Yuki grumbled, bringing the shower curtain up until it was tucked under his chin. “You also dragged Lando out so he would take your photos.” 

Max gaped. “Lando was there? Lando knows?!” 

“Yes, now can you please go bother him?” Yuki muttered under his breath. “And turn the lights off as you leave. Only wake me up when you order food.” 

...

...

“Don’t make me an accomplice in your crimes.” 

“Shut up and let us in.” 

You weren’t surprised to find that Lando and Logan were already in the room, both with looks of amusement on their faces as they watched you and Max wander in—still dressed in your wedding clothes from the night before. 

You wanted to slap the smug looks off their face. 

“Is it really a good idea to hide here?” Max asked as he took a seat on the edge of the bed, feeling as though the headache pounding through his head had nothing to do with the alcohol he consumed last night and more to do with the mess you both had created.

“It buys us time,” you insisted. 

“On the chance that Arthur doesn’t rat you out,” Logan added. 

“You told Arthur where I was?” Your eyes widened before you turned to look at Oscar. “Do you want me dead?” 

“You know, something about the way you’re wording that makes me feel like it’s a trick question,” Oscar commented with a suspicious look on his face.

“Oh my god, I’m going to die today,” you muttered under your breath, shaking your head. 

“It’s kinda romantic that you guys will die together,” Lando chimed in as he grinned between you and Max. 

“If I survive today, I’m going to run you over,” Max threatened with a strained smile on his lips.

Lando snorted, shrugging. “Yeah but the chances of that happening are low so…”

“Your brother doesn’t even know my room number,” Oscar pointed out. “It will take him ages to convince the desk to give it to him or even hunt—” 

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

“This is what English teachers meant when they taught us poetic irony,” Lando laughed, all giddy and happy.

“Like you paid attention,” you grumbled, eyes narrowing on the boy before you turned back to the door. “Don’t answer it.” 

Oscar’s eyes widened. “I can’t not answer it.” 

“Yes, you can,” you said bluntly. “Just don't open the door.”

“He knows we are in here,” he hissed. 

“We don’t know that for sure.” 

“OPEN UP! I CAN HEAR YOU! SOMEONE OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW OR I SWEAR TO GOD—” 

“Even more reason not to open the door,” you said, pressing your lips together to hide the wince that you wanted to let out as Charles thumped on the door again. 

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Max grumbled as he quickly stood up, ignoring your pleas to just pretend your brother didn’t exist. He reached the door, yanked it open and braced himself for the wrath of an angry Charles Leclerc.

Much to his surprise, the Monegasque barged straight past him and headed straight for Oscar instead. 

“You!” Charles gritted out through clenched teeth as he reached to grab Oscar’s collar, firsting the material in his hands. “What do you have to say to yourself?” 

Oscar’s eyes widened as Charles backed him into a wall. “What?!” 

“Marrying my sister in Vegas? What the fuck is wrong with you?” Charles continued. 

It didn’t take long for Lando to descend into a fit of giggles, practically on the floor if it weren’t for the fact Logan was keeping him on the bed. Somewhere still standing by the door, Arthur stood with an amused look on his face that only grew wider when he saw your confused and shocked expression too. 

“I didn’t marry your sister!” Oscar said to him, trying to push the boy away but he was latched on tightly. “I was literally in bed by nine!”

“Loser,” Logan grumbled under his breath.

Charles faltered, his eyebrows furrowing together. “What?”

“I wasn’t the guy to marry your sister,” Oscar repeated, finally managing to pull Charles’ hands off him. “I don’t think there is enough alcohol in the world for me to do that.”

“First Yuki and now him,” you scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest.

“If you didn’t marry her, then who did?” Charles questioned. 

It was almost comical how quickly everyone turned to look at Max, who was still standing by the door and looked like he was contemplating just dashing out the room.

“You,” Charles muttered out, his eyes narrowing on the Dutchman. 

“In my defence,” Max started as he gave the boy a smile, though it didn’t seem as confident as he was hoping it would be. “I didn’t know I married her either.”

“I am right here,” you huffed. “Jesus Christ.” 

“I am going to—” 

“Nothing. You’re going to do nothing,” you jumped in, taking a step so you were blocking his line of vision of Max. “It’s just a…phoney, fake marriage. It’s not that big of a deal, Charles. People will forget by next weekend anyways.”

“Uh,” Logan cleared his throat. “It’s actually very legal all over the US and in some other places—”

“Shut up, Logan.”

“Yes, ma’am.” 

Charles narrowed his eyes on you. “You’re not allowed to marry him.”

“I already did,” you pointed out with a sheepish expression. 

“I don’t care.” 

“Charles,” you stepped towards him, though the boy still looked like he was contemplating parading into the paddock with Max’s head on a stick. “Charlie, please. Don’t do something stupid because you’re annoyed.” 

“I want to cut his dick off,” Charles told you.

“I know.”

“And you can no longer have alcohol unsupervised.”

“That’s a tad dramatic.” 

“And no consummating the marriage.”

“That would be difficult to do if you cut off his dick anyways.”

“Can we stop talking about my dick?” Max chimed in with his hands locked in front of him, almost protectively.

Charles sighed. “But I promise I won’t kill either of you. Today.” 

You grinned as you reached towards your brother, wrapping your arms around his neck as you pulled him into a hug. “Thank you.”

“You should tell Maman before she finds out through the internet,” he murmured, pausing for a moment before continuing. “Maybe shower first. You stink of tequila.”

“That would be kinda hard to do considering Yuki is currently asleep in my bathtub,” you commented. 

Charles opened his mouth to reply but just shook his head. “I’m not even gonna ask.”

“Good, because I don’t have answers,” you murmured with your lips turned down. “And he’s really snappy when you try to get them from him.” 

Charles snorted. 

“So, that’s it?” Lando suddenly spoke up from behind you both. “God, that was not worth getting out of bed for. I expected more drama.”

“I’m still pissed at you,” you told the Brit, who just grinned. 

“I’ll send you the photos later, don’t you worry,” he said like he didn’t just hear the words that left your mouth. “Maybe one of them will inspire angry Charles again.”

“Please don’t,” Max grumbled. 

“It won’t be necessary because we are finding a divorce lawyer,” Charles stated simply, pressing a chaste kiss to the top of your head before he began making his way to the door, nodding for Arthur to follow him. “Both of you get dressed. We are leaving in an hour.”

Both you and Max gaped at the boy, but he didn’t notice. 

“And someone take one for the team and wake up Yuki. I vote Lando.” 

Lando frowned. “Woah, wait a second–”

“ONE HOUR PEOPLE!!”

...

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 133,728 others

yourusername call me mrs verstappen

view all 12,892 comments

oscarpiastri sometimes i wonder if you just enjoy pushing charles over the edge

yourusername yes

user WHAT

user it was real?????

user oh my god IT WAS MAX?

user someone sedate me

user this is some wattpad level stuff wtf the book tropes????

user i need to know how charles reacted when he found out

arthur_leclerc badly

maxverstappen1 i mean it was an accidental name but i guess it suits you

yourusername you like meeeee, admit it :)

maxverstappen1 i think i legally have to agree because you're my wife

yourusername damn don't sound too enthusiastic about it

user i just know charles lost years of his life over this

landonorris uh photo creds?

yourusername no

landonorris rude

charles_leclerc take this down

yourusername no

charles_leclerc you are a leclerc, not a verstappen

yourusername the marriage certificate says otherwise

charles_leclerc please stop reminding me

pascaleleclerc welcome to the family maxverstappen1

charles_leclerc MAMAN?????

maxverstappen1 thank you? i think?

pascaleleclerc dinner will be at 6 when you are back in monaco

maxverstappen1 yes ma'am

charles_leclerc MAMAN WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON????

.

“Dirty blond” my fucking ass

whenever i see criston cole

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