Eee! Thank You! I Love It So Much! 💖 Everything About It Is Wonderful. No Worries About Being Late,

Eee! Thank you! I love it so much! 💖 Everything about it is wonderful. No worries about being late, I know how crazy this time of year can be! 🤗 It was well worth the wait!

First of Many

This is my belated fic for @mabsgatos‘ Secrert Santa for @mageink! I’m so terribly sorry that it was so late! I hope you enjoy it because I had fun writing it!

Also find it here- https://archiveofourown.org/works/21999169

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Crowley hated Christmas for one simple reason: he was always lonely. His plans always seemed to fall through, so he never got to celebrate.  Though, it is important to mention here that his plans ‘falling through’ was completely of his own doing. You can’t celebrate if you don’t show up and enjoy the season with people you care about if you don’t show up.

Every few hundred years Aziraphale would get in touch with Crowley and invite him to wherever he was celebrating (most of the last century had been at the bookshop, which was always beautifully decorated). Nine times out of ten, Crowley would be kind enough to say no, he didn’t want to go or that he was busy. There had been a few times where he had been less kind and had said he would come only to not show up. He knew that that probably hurt the angel quite a bit so he didn’t do that very often. For him, the worst times had been when he was standing outside of the bookshop, looking in. It was so warm looking, with the fire going and beautiful lights hanging everywhere. Aziraphale was almost always sitting at his desk, glasses low on his nose as he read his latest book. Crowley would watch him for longer than he would care to admit before he would slowly turn away, driven by some unseen force.

He didn’t have a reason for why he never spent the holidays with Aziraphale when it was all he wanted. Since the invention of Christmas, he had imagined what it would be like to celebrate with him. Crowley just figured he was a coward who couldn’t confront the way that he felt. But see, they didn’t celebrate Christmas in hell, which was obvious he supposed, but deep down he had a feeling that that’s part of the reason why he didn’t spend the holiday with Aziraphale. It was a worth thing.

He couldn’t celebrate such a lovely holiday with someone who epitomized everything it was supposed to be: light, warmth, happiness and kindness because he wasn’t any of those things. He would only ruin it for Aziraphale. So he stayed away.

That wasn’t to say he didn’t leave gifts for the angel. Aziraphale always had a beautiful tree set up in the middle of his shop, where it could reach the second floor. He had hundreds of ornaments, as he had been collecting them for thousands of years. They were just as treasured as his books. Mysteriously, every year, a new ornament would appear on his tree, seemingly without an origin. Aziraphale knew that it was Crowley coming in when he wasn’t around. They were stunning and handmade by top-notch artisans and they always had some secret meaning from the year before. Crowley didn’t do this every year (though he had more recently because they had gotten much closer over the last hundred years), but usually only in the years that Aziraphale invited Crowley over.

The demon didn’t understand why the angel continued to invite him when not one single time did he come over. Though getting the invitations did make him feel good. It made him feel… well, loved. This year, however, was different. It was the first Christmas after the Apocalypse that never happened, and the first time that Crowley felt like he didn’t have to hide. For yet another year, Crowley got a text, ‘Christmas at the bookshop? 5?’

It was Christmas Eve when the angel sent the message and Crowley didn’t answer. One of the more dickish things he had done in a while but he couldn’t bring himself to respond out of fear of getting the other’s hopes up. Better to say nothing at all.

Christmas Day rolled around and, once again, Crowley was standing outside the bookshop. He was looking in like he had so many times before but this time it was different. This time he was building up the courage to walk inside like he had wanted to do for so long. He would never admit how long it took him to knock on the door because it was a long time. Longer than it should have considering he was just going to see his best friend. He shifted the gift he had in his hands again before knocking on the door hesitantly- something he didn’t need to do at all.

Aziraphale walked to the door, and as he did, he said, “I’m sorry but it’s Christmas! We are decidedly-“ He peeked out at the street from behind one of his drawn blinds and when he did, he gasped, “Crowley!” He opened the door and grinned, “Crowley, I didn’t think you were coming!” The look alone on his face was more than worth Crowley’s anxieties. His whole face was lit up in a bright, happy grin. He was practically glowing.

“Uh, yeah, angel.” He smiled sheepishly, “I hope that it’s okay. I don’t want to intrude.” He was uncharacteristically nervous, or at least, showing his nerves. That was something he never did.

“You know that you are never a bother. Come in! Come in!” He moved out of the doorway so that Crowley could walk inside. The demon hesitated a moment before he walked through the threshold. He looked around the bookshop slowly, like he was seeing it for the first time, “Oh! Merry Christmas, angel.” He said as he pushed the small red-wrapped gift into the other’s hands.

Aziraphale grinned, “Merry Christmas, Crowley.” He took the present and looked down at it, “How thoughtful! Should I open it now or later?” He asked.

Crowley was busy looking at the tree and all the ornaments that were hanging on it, so he didn’t answer. He recognized some of them as ones he had given to Aziraphale. One was a nod to Oscar Wilde. He had wanted to get something that, to Aziraphale, was obviously connected to the author but thinking of the man sometimes made the angel sad and that was the last thing that Crowley ever wanted to make him. So, he had gotten him a green carnation- and Aziraphale had cried a little when he saw it.

Crowley had never been there when Aziraphale got his ornaments. He would sneak in when the other was preoccupied, hang it quickly on the tree, and then slip out again. Aziraphale would find them a little while later, or sometimes, not until he took the tree down, and he always knew who they were from. It made his heart so unbelievably warm. Today was different though, today was going to be the first time Aziraphale opened the present with Crowley in the room. He wasn’t sure he wanted to be here anymore.

“Dear?” Aziraphale looked over at him. It shook Crowley out of his daze, “Hm?” The demon looked over at him.

“I was asking if you wanted me to open this now or later?” He repeated the question from earlier.

“You can open it now if you want.” Crowley pretended that it wasn’t a big deal but it was. It was a very big deal and he was having a little bit of a freak out because of it, so he wanted Aziraphale to open it up now so that he could get it over with. The angel pondered it for a moment, “I’ll go get yours! And then we can open it at the same time.” He grinned and hurried over to the tree where there was one present under it. It was wrapped in gold paper.

Crowley blinked, “What is this?” He took it hesitantly, “You shouldn’t-“

“Do not start with me.” Aziraphale said in a mock stern tone, “I wanted to. You have never let me get you anything in the past so I’m forced to give them to you at a later date and pretend that it was a random gift!”

Crowley gasped, “You did wha-“ “Sit!” Aziraphale cut him off again and pointed to the couch Crowley often inhabited. Crowley rolled his eyes, even if his sunglasses stopped Aziraphale from seeing, but still sat when told to. He was a little bit soft for his angel, who could blame him?

Aziraphale sat on the other end of the couch, “May I?” He held up the red wrapped box. Crowley didn’t answer, he just nodded. He felt as though there was a lump in his throat and if he went to talk his voice would crack.

As with almost everything Aziraphale did, he opened the present gently. It was like he was savoring it- just like when he ate almost   anything. He pulled the top off the box and inside, nestled between tissue paper, was yet another ornament. This one was a pair of wings, with one wing a beautiful white with the detailing of the feathers done in black. The other wing was black, with the detailing done in white. Aziraphale gasped softly when he pulled it out, “Crowley! This is beautiful!” He beamed and looked over at him, “This is amazing. Thank you so much.” He leaned over and kissed the other’s cheek.

Crowley was frozen in place. Was this how Aziraphale always reacted to his gifts? Or was he just doing that because he was there? Then he kissed his cheek and he couldn’t believe it. His cheeks flushed and he wanted to say something to Aziraphale but all that came out was, “You’re welcome.” Because he couldn’t trust himself with any more words than that. He was so taken aback by everything that had just happened. He couldn’t believe it.

Aziraphale either didn’t catch onto what was going on or, for the sake of Crowley, ignored his flailing. It was probably the latter. The angel was so caught up in this beautiful and amazing gift that he didn’t see how the demon was reacting to the previous series of events, “Oh! Do yours now!” He smiled brightly at him, his eyes glittering with unnamed love.

Crowley hesitated. He was sure that he didn’t deserve whatever was in this box but he could never say no to the angel, especially not when he was looking so expectant and… nervous? That was nervousness behind those eyes, was it not? Crowley looked at the present in front of him and slowly pulled to top off of it since it was wrapped as the top and bottom. Inside was a twig with a red bow tied around it, right before these green leaves grew out of it. It was fake too. Crowley picked it up and tilted his head, “You know I keep plants, right? I could keep a living-“

“That’s not what it is, Crowley. That’s not the point.” Aziraphale took Crowley’s hand in his own and ever so slightly brought their hands up so that the twig was a little above their heads, “It- it’s mistletoe.” He murmured and looked hesitantly at the other. Crowley’s mind went blank. He knew exactly what this meant, and he knew what humans did next. He cleared his throat, “Oh, well, I-“

Aziraphale blinked and pulled his hand away from Crowley’s, “I apologize. It seems I have misread our situation and-“

“No!” The demon shook his head, “No! Angel, you-“ He put the mistletoe back in the box and reached up to remove his sunglasses so that their eyes met without a barrier, “You don’t need to have a piece of fake plant for that.” He said once his glasses were put away in his jacket. He couldn’t believe this was happening, it was just a fever dream, he was sure. “Although, I do enjoy the… sentiment of it.” He gave him a reassuring smile.

The angel smiled at him, bright and loving, “I don’t know why we’re waiting then.” His cheeks were a light shade of pink now and he smiled shyly at the other. Crowley leaned a little closer, “I don’t either.”

In the end, Aziraphale was the one that closed the gap between the two of them. The kiss was hesitant at first, but welcome and feeling of something… familiar. Crowley couldn’t help the smile that ghosted his lips as they kissed, chaste as it was. Crowley pulled away first and blinked at Aziraphale a few times, “Tell me why this is only the first Christmas I’ve spent with you?” He murmured.

Aziraphale chuckled a bit, “I’m not sure. But do tell me this won’t be the last?”

“I’m already making plans for next year.” He grinned at him, “You’ll have to put up with me for a long, long time.”