I Love Angst So Much Oh My God

i love angst so much oh my god

also, i got a question once about why does hidan looks so angry at arika sometimes. i didn't really know how to answer properly cuz there's a bit too much to explain and i feel a little shy doing that, but since i dropped another angsty thing ig it's my duty now to explain this thing somehow

ok so very shortly, arika actually can't feel any emotions and doesn't have any moral principles, so she's unable to feel the difference between good and evil. since hidan is pure definition of the concept of 'evil' itself, he was quite stunned when some pretty girl he just got as a partner didn't see anything bad in him. like "bruh wth this chick doesn't fear me, actually respects me and even treats me kindly sometimes no one does that what da fuck!!!" so he obviously came up with an idea that she might be in love with him or just likes him at least but!!! no she can't even understand the concept of love itself, arika's care about him is a pure sign of respect towards the older teammate and there is no personal feelings in it. and so on hidan's feelings for her grew progressively and always shattered slightly when he remembered that she is unable to even see what things he feels, but that is not the end!!! jashinism actually forbids any good personal relationships with anyone (it was written in novel and i know it's not very canon but since we don't have much canon info about hidan's religion i think it's valid to use this thing) so he just found himself on a crossroad of decisions: kill arika to not feel these conflict feelings inside of him and obey the rules of his religion or keep her alive through suffering emotional breakdowns every now and then and also keep trying to make her at least become attached to him somehow cuz he doesn't really want her dead actually and deep down believes in a light future with her. if you think arika didn't suffer much here you're kinda right but no she did omg everyone must be in pain!!! after hidan got buried alive and kakuzu got rasensurikene'd she actually realized how good it was being partnered with them. she lived to boruto's times and now blames herself for not saving them, even now as an adult civilized citizen who shouldn't really be sympathetic towards terrorist organisation that literally started a goddamn war lol so i guess it is yeah sorry if there's a lot of grammar errors or whatever i'm typing this without a translator my head hurts