Lights Part 3

Lights Part 3

There’s a pleasant warmth curled around you and the heaviness of the comforter that’s got you feeling like a very loved burrito makes it hard to open your eyes. You’re struggling to not keep blinking continuously but its a difficult task, you’re warm, you’re comfortable, and you’ve got no where to be. The arm wrapped around your stomach drags you closer as your eyes sag closed-

You’re wide awake in an instant. Heart hammering and lungs seizing as you go absolutely rigid. You don’t invite people into your house anymore, especially not into your bed, those are your sacred little spaces that you crawl into to feel secure. But you can feel the person- sleep heavy- curled along your back in an awkward spooning position with an arm and leg thrown over you. Warm breath tickling the back of your neck that suddenly feels too exposed. You’re too exposed and there is someone in your bed and you can’t breathe and-

The leg that was thrown over you is removed and there are hands dragging you upright and a vaguely familiar voice murmuring something close enough to your face you can feel the puffs of air each word makes. It’s not until hands are cupping your jaw and the words level out into a constant soothing hush of consolation that you finally realize who’s kneeling over your lap and looking lost and upset. Polypa’s eyes are wide with worry as her voice seizes up and relaxes against the chattering cicada noise that wants to come out. She settles for a stream of constant shushing noises that buzz just a bit the closer to panic she comes. She’s never seen you like this. Never seen or realized exactly how messed up Alternia had left you. It claws at her mind and whispers the horrible thought of failing as a moirail that she never noticed. That she never pried even when you seemed just fine. She should have. She should know exactly what’s keeping you up at night and what sends you into a blind panic. Polypa should have known where you lived too. As a moirail these were basic things that helped build the foundation of a stable diamond. The fact she didn’t have the faintest clue about any of it was enough for olive tinted tears to well up in the corners of her eyes. After everything you had simply fallen off the map, complete radio silence, Polypa had looked everywhere for you. The mall was the last place she ever thought to bump into you and the elation she had felt had been short lived at the absolutely shattered look in your eyes. The way you had simply crumbled at the slightest gentle touch had felt like a sucker punch to the gut. 

“It’s alright, it’s going to be alright, just breathe for me.” You took in a stuttering breath following along to the gentle breathing that Polypa was trying to coach you into. You were safe, you were home, you were in bed, and Polypa had spent the night after the most intense and dissociative feelings jam of your life. It was fine. Slowly you began to calm down. The two of you would need to have that talk you’d been dreading. The one where you had to tell her everything and wait for her to decide whether she was going to sign up for dealing with your bullshit or throw herself out the window to get as far away from your flaming dumpster fire as she could. For a moment you debated lying out your ass and saying you’ve just been having a horrible week and leaving it at that. The thought was abandoned as quickly as it formed. Polypa’s eyes were earnest and bordering desperate. She wanted- and by extension needed- to hear the truth. No matter how much it’d feel like pulling teeth. 

“We need to talk.” You finally sighed out, shoulders slumping as the fight left you. She tensed and you realized how bad that probably sounded. “It- Its- Hey, Polypa, its not... Well okay its bad but- just let me explain?” Preferably in the kitchen where you could sit at the table and talk this out like rational adults. Even if you felt like a frightened preteen about to spill their guts for the first time. It took a few more reassurances that you were more or less okay and that you weren’t about to kick her out to get her to let you up. From there you grabbed some drinks from your fridge and took a seat at the little kitchen table you had set up. Polypa drummed her claws along the can of soda you’d handed her- a nervous tick you’d adopted from her long ago. You weren’t sure where to even start with this. A confession of how pale you still were for her? Word vomit about the time just before landing on Alternia? Or straight to the chase? Running a hand through your hair as your foot bounced nervously you took a deep breath. 

“When...” You had to clear your throat past the lump in it, “When I first landed on Alternia... I-,” A shuddering breath left you and you had to close your eyes for a moment to keep from bursting into tears. To keep from becoming an incoherent babbling mess. It took Polypa’s hand covering one of your own to get back what little composure you had. 

“You don’t have to tell me everything now.” She offered in the silence as you tried to collect your words again. Tempted as you were to take her up on that you knew she deserved to know. 

“When I first landed on Alternia there was something wrong with me. I knew something was wrong but for the life of me couldn’t figure out what it might be. So I pushed it aside for the thrill of making friends. Of meeting new people. It wasn’t until I left that I finally realized what happened. What was wrong...” She was staring at you with such rapt attention you felt like a bug pinned to a cork board. “I was... It- I- shit... Everything that happened on Alternia felt fake, like I was some chess piece on a board waiting for someone to make a move. A pawn. And I... I was. I was a pawn. The man... The-,” Your fists clenched at the memory, “Doc fucking Scratch.” You barked out venomously teeth grinding with the force of it. It was the first time you’d allowed yourself to say his name. To speak it into existence. For once you weren’t afraid it’d bring him down upon you like a swarm of locusts. No, for once you wanted to wrap your hands around that puppet’s felt fucking neck and squeeze. Sucking in a deep breath you continued on. “He fucked with my mind Polypa. I was a backseat passenger to a shit show I had no control over. Everything I ever did was mapped out and if I made a wrong choice? I wound up in a groundhog style remake of that moment until I made the correct decision. I died Polypa, I remember every death- every bad ending- every time I had to stare down at one of my friends and know that I killed them! And then I’d blink and I’d be back where I started staring down at the choices I was allowed to make and praying I’d get it right this time. He took all my words and twisted them to fit his narrative. I was there to make the right friends and then be tossed aside when there was no use for me. And when he plucked me out of the narrative again and gave me back my at least some of my mind I fucking spiraled. I went about making more friends because I couldn’t do anything else. Because that fucker took my memories from me so that I would continue in a loop until it killed me. And when I finally snapped out of it I tore everything to shreds to get to him. I destroyed entire timelines just so I could burn everything that pompous bastard held dear to the ground. And I succeeded. At least partially... The next time I woke up I was sleeping in a motel room in some place I’d never even heard of. I found a job and I scraped up enough to get a decent place, I knew that everyone was still out there. I did. I just couldn’t bring myself to play the game again. Even if it was all in my head.” Tears were dripping off the tip of your nose as you stared down at your fist and Polypa’s hand still placed over yours. It took her choking out your name for you to finally look her in the face. Olive tears were streaming down her cheeks and she looked miserable. Like you had ripped the heart from her chest and stomped it into the dirt. 

“Everything you did was against your will?” Her voice was so small and for a moment you almost agreed. But that wasn’t what she was really asking. Reaching out you took her hands in yours and squeezed as tightly as you could. 

“The time we spent together was the closest I ever got to being myself. If it’s one thing I’d do over and over and over again it would be becoming your moirail. Never doubt that Polypa. Never.” A small keen left her lips and then you suddenly found yourself with a lap full of blubbering troll. Her claws were digging through the shirt you wore as her arms squeezed you like a vice. Words practically unintelligible and at least mostly in Alternian bubbled out of her in a tormented jumble. More tears gathered in your eyes as you cradled her close and started crying in earnest. You had your moirail back, of her own choice, and the dam you’d kept everything behind finally burst. 

More Posts from Morsartis and Others

3 years ago

It may take me a while to get request done but man do I try to deliver. Ngl I feel bad real life keeps getting in the way of churning out content but I gotta pay the bills some way. I appreciate the patience everyone has shown while I work on requests and real life problems and I just want people to know that. I'm still continuing to work on other requests and asks so for those that send them in please don't be discouraged. I'm just slow.


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3 years ago

Compliment

It wasn't often that you got to stare at your classmate, he was usually nearly constantly moving around. But for the past ten minutes he'd been glaring down at his essay in concentration. His fingers carded through white hair as he tapped his pencil at a near rapid rate. Pale eyelashes nearly hiding the dark brown of his eyes as they flitted over the words he'd already written. Looking at him this closely you could see a faint indent on his nose as if he'd been wearing goggles. Eyes trailing over his face you watched as his eyes caught yours. Brows furrowing as a slight frown tugged at his lips- you couldn't look away. The light from the windows caught his eyes turning them a coffee brown instead of the nearly black color they were. Caught up in staring at them you were surprised to see the slight sliver of blue ringed around the brown. Gone in an instant as his eyes darted to the side and then back to yours.

"What are you staring at?" He hissed defensively, shoulders drawn up almost to his ears. You blinked at him as his words caught up to you. Months of watching him in your classes had taught you the best thing to do was to catch him off guard with honesty before he actually got angry and so you blurted the first thought that had crossed your mind.

"You have nice eyes."

He blinked clearly not expecting it. Perfect. His shoulders dropped from their defensive posture as he stared at you, face smoothed out in surprise. Again his eyes searched yours for answers that you didn't technically have. They dropped back down towards his paper as his pencil resumed its rapid tapping- just slightly harder than before. If you hadn't been watching him so closely you might have missed the slight flush that creeped across his face and towards his ears. Deciding to cut your watching short you looked back down to the book you were citing for your own essay. The compliment was small, something you'd tell any of your friends. You felt little shame or embarrassment in saying it. It was true, Peter had lovely eyes. Out of the corner of your eye you caught him biting his lip to hide a smile. You didn't bother to hide yours as you highlighted a quote. As the class crawled by slowly you watched the way his fingers kept coming up to rest just beneath his eyes and the way his lips would twitch with that almost smile. As if the compliment had been more than just simple observation on your part.

When class finally did end he was the first one out the door as usual. Always in a rush to get to the next thing. It hardly mattered to you, you only knew Peter as a hyperactive classmate. The two of you weren't friends and the most you'd ever talked to each other was during group projects. As you made your way out of the class to head to your last one of the day your mind was already wandering to the next assignment you'd be doing and the other classmates you'd be dealing with.

You almost missed the person who fell into step with you. But it was hard to miss his usual strange sense of style and that white hair. He seemed jittery as his attention darted from one thing to the next. But it was unmistakable that he was walking with you and not in the general direction you were going. He walked nearly in your own personal bubble seeming to step in and out of it as if unsure of what he was doing. It was cute. As you arrived to your next class your eyes caught a bit of string clinging to his jacket as he went to turn and walk back to his own class.

"Peter?" He froze mid step as you stepped closer to him. Plucking the string from the lapel of his leather jacket you took a moment to even them both out. "You had some string stuck to it." You explained simply. He continued to stare at you mutely- a rare thing from him. Usually he had a witty reply for everything. You watched in fascination as his adams apple bobbed as he swallowed. By now people usually called you a creep and tried to put distance between themselves and you. Instead Peter flushed in that interesting hardly noticeable way of his and cleared his throat.

"Cool." And as if he were never there in the first place he was gone. Frowning you glanced around the hallway, only seeing other students you hardly knew. Shrugging it off you went to sit down in your science class, hoping it'd pass quickly so you could go home. If it was another thing you'd learned in the months of sharing classes with Peter it was that you'd never understand him.


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2 years ago

Rodimus x Professional!Reader Pt. 1

The first part is from Reader's POV and the second will be from Rodimus' POV.

Parts:

Part 2- https://www.tumblr.com/morsartis/712534482204377088/rodimus-x-professionalreader-pt-2?source=share

Part 3- https://www.tumblr.com/morsartis/712534804211662848/rodimus-x-professionalreader-pt-3?source=share

----

Hot water beat down on your back as you rested your head on the shower wall. Everything ached. From your toes to your scalp you felt like one massive bruise. It wasn’t uncommon for you to get back to your quarters feeling drained and tired. Ever since the Lost Light had taken on human crew members your hands had been full, especially following your commander's death. A day that still weighed something fierce on your heart. You’d had to step up- despite the fact that you hadn’t been next in line to lead at all. There had been too much panic, too much grief, and you had done what you had always done in the face of terrible personal tragedy and chaos. You’d buckled down and taken over. Somehow that had led to you being promoted as the human liaison to the captain of the Lost Light. It was an honor certainly but it was something you struggled with. All that responsibility on your shoulders, Commander Jameson had grown livid when the promotion had passed over him and went to you instead. His contempt and judgment was yet another thing that weighed you down. He made it clear that he had little to no respect for you or your new position. It had led to endless fights over the tiniest things that shouldn’t have been fights in the first place. 

Sighing heavily you blinked past the water running down your face. The need for actual running water on the Lost Light had been Commander Hennis’ first petition when you’d come aboard and after her death it had only been right for you to continue that petition. You were grateful for it. Slicking your hair back you took another moment to simply breathe. One deep breath in and then the slow exhale. Shutting off the spray you blindly reached for your towel. Wrapping the soft fluffy thing around yourself you relished its warmth as you stepped out of the tub and into the slightly cooler room. You cursed when you realized you’d left your sleep clothes on your bed. Stepping into the main portion of your room you froze, the blood draining from your face so quickly you almost felt light headed. Clutching the towel tightly to yourself you straightened up immediately. Shit, you were way too underdressed, your hair was still wet and tangled, you were wearing a towel. 

“Captain!” You resisted the urge to salute if only because you feared losing your towel. Rodimus froze, optics wide as he glanced down at you. Jesus, you could die of mortification. 

“I-,” His voicebox made an odd sound you could only describe as a radio dial, “I didn’t realize you were here.”

“I thought to get an early night, Sir.” Oh you just wanted to curl into a ball and die. This was so unprofessional. God, you even planned your own pajamas to be professional in case of an emergency. Why did he have to walk in now? Why did you forget your clothes on your bed? You glanced at your folded clothes and felt a new mortification rising when you realized you’d done like you usually did and placed your underwear on top. Your very nice, lacey, underwear that you rarely got the chance to wear and only decided to wear tonight to make yourself feel nice. As a secret little pick-me-up that only you would know about. The red stood out starkly against your grey sweats and space program t-shirt, the clothes far too professional to even consider what you might be wearing underneath. Even the sports bra you’d chosen was cute with its little lacey front and tiny decorative bow. As if sensing your mortification you could only observe in horror as Rodimus followed your gaze to the clothes you’d plainly laid out. If it were even possible it was as if he froze and locked up more than previously. 

Was- was he blushing?! 

Your face was officially on fire you were simply going to kill yourself. Anything to escape the mortification. Your co-captain, your liaison partner, knew what you were going to wear to bed and he’d been around human culture long enough to understand exactly why you might have been embarrassed. Grasping at straws like it was all you could do, you tried to regain control of the situation. 

“Ahem,” You cleared your throat drawing his attention back to you, “Was there a particular reason you were coming into my quarters Captain?” 

Rodimus straightened up quickly his grip on his holopad tightening. 

“Ah- yes. There was- well… Ahem. To be honest-,” He was stammering, god you were never going to live down the embarrassment, “I wanted your opinion on a transfer I’ve been considering.” 

“A transfer?”

“Yes. One of the humans here.”

That wiped the embarrassment straight from your system. Technically Rodimus could transfer whoever he wished at any point so long as Megatron signed off on said transfer. It had been an unspoken rule since Commander Hennis’ and since your own tenure that all human transfers were to be decided by the human liaison. For Rodimus to even consider transferring a human without giving the full reigns to you must have been serious. 

“May I ask the reason for transfer?”

“Insubordination.” The way he said it left little room to question. His voice was grave and serious in a way you rarely heard from your usually compassionate companion. Clearly this was not a decision he had made lightly. 

“And the crewmember?” You asked after a moment when it became clear he was not going to elaborate. 

“Commander Jameson.” 

“What?” You asked the question slipping out before you could help it. To say you were shocked was an understatement. You had thought that Commander Jameson had been wise enough to keep his displeasure and insubordination pointed towards you and you only. 

“I think it would be best for both the crew and for Commander Jameson himself if he were placed with a different vessel.” 

“My apologies then Captain, I had thought that Commander Jameson had merely been targeting me due to the promotional passover that occurred following Commander Hennis’ passing. I hadn’t a clue that he’d been lashing out towards other higher-ups. Please allow me to talk to him and discuss these matters, I shall ensure he keeps his issues with the chain of command solely with me.” 

“That’s the problem!” Rodimus shouted, waving his arm through the air. You jumped. “He shouldn’t be treating you that way in the first place! You received the promotion because you earned it. Your crew would have been killed if you hadn’t made the calls you did and kept a level head. While Commander Jameson was too busy trying to prove himself you were putting in the actual work. You brought your crew together, you led them into action, you pulled them through that dark time. Not him! I am tired of hearing his baseless complaints about your leadership. You’ve gone above and beyond what was expected of you for the sake of your human crew and your cybertronian companions!” 

You could feel the flush traveling from your cheeks all the way to your shoulders the flattery soothing a sore spot you had been nursing for a while now. But still, despite Jameson’s clear dislike of you, you had a duty to him as his superior. 

“I understand that Rodimus and I thank you for your conviction of my skills,” You replied soothingly, adjusting your hold on your towel, “However, I have a duty to my crew. Commander Jameson’s grievances are with me and me alone. Outside of that he has followed all his orders from other officers to a perfect T. Unless there are incidents I haven’t been informed of..?” You trailed off waiting for a reply. 

“... No. He’s followed orders from other crew members well enough.” Rodimus admitted begrudgingly. You offered him a sincerely sympathetic smile. 

“Then I owe him the chance to discuss options with me first before the call is made for him. If he wishes to transfer then I will be happy to have him transferred, but if he wishes to stay then that decision should be respected as well.”

That was clearly not what he wanted to hear. Rodimus’ expression turned stony, every bit the captain he had to be instead of the mech you had gotten to know. 

“Please let him know that if he fails to follow your direct orders again he will be transferred regardless.” His voice was cold, a sort of anger that sent chills down your spine. You’d never heard anything like it. From Megatron you might have been able to keep the surprise off your face but from Rodimus? The change was too intense not to show your shock. “I’ve transferred the documents to you for review. Good night.” 

Just like that he was gone leaving you standing there shivering from the cold in your towel wondering what had gotten into the normally sunny optimistic mech. Swallowing nervously you shuffled towards your pajamas and got dressed. Everything would have to wait until the morning but already anxiety was beginning to set in. What would you do about this? What could be done to fix it? If you didn’t know him so well by now you would have thought Rodimus was angry with you, but you knew that despite what had happened his anger was directed towards Jameson. With a deep breath you sat on your bed and tried to relax. You’d get this sorted out just like you always did. It would be fine. And then you could talk with Rodimus about why it had upset him the way it did.


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2 years ago

reblog to beat the joker to death

2 years ago
Source: This

Source: This

3 years ago

hey hey! I would like to req some headcanons of Marvus and his human s/o whos more into rock music genre (but still is super supportive of marvus even tho they dk whats gg on in the rap scene??) Thanks!!

The great thing about Marvus is that despite his music being centered on rap- he actually does like most music.

So when you bring him your phone and show him some “Earth Rock” he’s all about it.

Though his expertise is rap, after all on Alternia rap sells the best, he isn’t a stranger to rock.

After listening to a few songs you obviously like he’s going to hunt down the Alternian equivalent. Just for you.

Music is a great way to forge a connection and Marvus knows this the best.

He definitely sends you random rock songs he happens to find.

Of course knowing what type of music you usually like helps him to figure out the angle he needs to work to get you into his music.

Its a gradual shift that’s helped along by your own support of what he does.

He appreciates the fact you’re interested in what he does even if most of it flies right over your head.

You’ve got the best seats in the house wherever he happens to perform and if you happen to like an Alternian rock band?

He’ll get you the best seats there too.

Though he has to be careful about what you seem to gravitate too.

There’s quite a language barrier and sometimes what sounds pleasing to you causes anxiety to him.

The thought of you painting a big ol target on your back with the media you consume is no small worry.

Even the smallest infraction could be a death sentence or worse.

But he does enjoy those quiet times you two curl up and listen to both of your music together.

Its a welcomed softness in the usual harsh reality that Alternia commands.


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2 years ago

Reblog if you’re a kind and friendly mun who likes to write violent and disturbing stuff...

Let’s see how many of us there are!

5 years ago

Modern Fantasy Headcanons #2

Vampire covens have largely shifted from the wealthy upper class adults to the lower class college kids over time. In fact a recent study has shown that vampires will specifically target college kids to change and bite. This is mostly due to the fact colleges still abide by the forgiveness of student loans if you are dead- or in this case undead. With the rise in prices and the stagnation of wages most college students jump at the opportunity. This makes it easier for the covens to get new members. 

Despite the targeting of college students the coven leader will send scouts to observe the human for a series of months to see if they will fit within the coven. They will then strike at the human’s lowest moment to ensure consent. From there the coven will begin observing the human’s connections. It is not uncommon to find an entire family or friend group being bitten and absorbed into a coven. This ensures stronger coven ties and the strengthening of the coven as a whole. 


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Morsartis

Your friendly pansexual fantasy writer and theorist. Come and be welcome. I'm happy to take requests for different fandoms as well! !!REQUESTS ARE OPEN AND ENCOURAGED!!

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