Numbers Don’t Matter

No... I never meant to say the things I said. I never meant to make you think that all I say is lies. I'm sorry for being so two-faced with you. I just have so many emotions that I want to show you that I try to show as many as I can. I'm sorry for never completely trusting you... I just feel that I can never fully trust anyone no matter how much I want to.

Thoughts of a Gemini writer

Death’s Little Shadow (Black Butler Various x Oc)

Chapter One-

Run. That was the only thought running through her mind at the moment as she ran through the woods. The night sky not giving her any help in trying to find a place to hide. She knew that if she stopped now, they would surely get to her. She would do whatever it took to leave that horrid place, even if it meant death.

 Don't look back. Those words, along with others, repeated at the back of her mind. Blaring like alarms throughout her mind not letting her think of anything else. The teen knew if that she didn't listen it, it would just be the end of her.

 Don't think. She would want to go back for the others; the ones who had risked their lives for her, her family. She would start to feel the pain, physically and emotionally, if she did. Gnawing at her all over, not sparing her any mercy. The teen's eyes widened as she saw a clearing, leading towards the streets of London. Little puffs of air shot out of her mouth as she kept going, trying with all her might not to screw things up.

 Hide. That's all she can do at the moment. No matter how bad she wanted to do otherwise. Go back for the ones that risked their lives, to stop it all; this madness that had spiraled out of control all because of them. She knew she wouldn't be able to keep running for long. She looked around; it was hard to see with only a few street lamps to help.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 The teen stopped running as the noise rang through the air without a single protest.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 The girl realized as she looked up that she was almost at the heart of London. Where it would be easier to hide until she could go back and finally end it all.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 The tower, also known as Big Ben, had it's hands showing that it was midnight. Every single detail of the ancient tower becoming sketched into her mind at that moment.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 She could hear voices coming her way. It was them. The ones that she was running from. The ones that had ruined her life. The ones that started it all.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 The young woman started to run although her body protested. She knew even if she cried for help no one would help her. It wouldn't be the first time it's happened.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 She had barely ran a block from where she was standing just moments before when a hand grabbed her; forcing her into an alleyway.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 The girl opened her eyes; not realizing when she had closed them. It took every inch of her will to look at who or what had grabbed her. She knew it would either be the beginning of a new journey or the end of her doom.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 She found herself staring back at lime-green eyes that seemed to glow in the dead of night. They were staring at her in a way that made her feel as if they were looking into her soul, trying to find out her deepest, darkest secrets.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 The young woman was trapped in between the mysterious man's arms, her back against a brick wall. Caging her into what would be either the help she needed-no, was dying to get, or the inevitable death that she would be forever running from. The girl's breathing hitched when she heard the voices in a far off distance. Calling her, trying to bring her back. Wanting to draw her towards them just to drag her back to where they came from. The man seemed to realize this too as he smirked at her deviously.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

 "I would like you to be my new assistant. My previous assistant was by no means fun and went away." The mysterious man whispered into her ear, being too close for her comfort.

 "What?!" She replied, being careful as to not get caught. She didn't really know what to say. I don't even know this guy! He could be a killer for all I know! The  young woman thought as her heart was beating erratically. Not letting her be able to think clearly from how loud it sounded to her. "If you don't tell me your answer by the last strike of the bell I will let those people know you're right here. That wouldn't be much fun now would it?" Every and every word the mysterious man said made the young woman's eyes widened. She needed to be quick about making her decision but it had to be a good one as well. As the girl was having an inner war with herself, she failed to realize that the voices were getting nearer and nearer.

 Anything is better than going back there, she thought. But what happens if  this is worse?! Her mind was spinning. "What will it be?" The man asked, seeming to enjoy the fear radiating off of the poor girl. Anything beats going back to that place. As she opened her mouth to make her decision, she was interrupted by the people that were looking for her.

 DOOOONNNNGGGG.

she wears her smile like a cloak. no one knows of what lies beneath. she either relishes the anonymity or has simply forgotten how to escape it.

Noor Shirazie (via noorshirazie)

“Please. All I ask is that you live and give me a chance to show you this world isn’t as ugly as you believe.” Well. I’ve been told that before. Over and over again. I want to believe that they’re right, but every time I’m told this there is always someone there to just leave again.

‘Maybe they just don’t have the piece I’ve been looking for...’ I always persuade myself as I look into that box. That small, worn down box always makes me feel like it’s a constant reminder of what I’m missing out on and all of the bad things that have happened to me. 

It’s been sitting in the same place by the window ever since I was born. They say that when you’re born you have ten little shapes and that whoever has the same one as you is either your soulmate or is someone that you care about. As for me, I only came with five. Four blue circles and a scarlet broken heart. 

The four blue circles have been taken by family members and a friend that I care about but as for the scarlet broken heart, there has never been anyone that has that same piece. I’ve always been told never to show my pieces until I know they are the one... So far the people I thought were the ones never even came close to sharing that final piece.

I wish I never had that stupid piece. It just sits there. Toying with me; rubbing it in my face that I will never be fully happy. ‘Today, today is the day I am getting rid of it.’ As I grab the box I start to think back at the times I had been right about who’s pieces were the same as mine. How much joy it brought me.... and how if I threw away this one I will never be able to feel that way again...

I start to walk out of my apartment with the bow secured tightly in my hold. I fall down as I bump into someone.

“I’m so sorry-” I begin to say as I notice that the piece is on the floor along with the now opened box. The guy I now recognized to be my neighbor right across from me helps me pick it up. 

“Hey,” he says to me as he holds onto my piece, “I have the same exact one.” I look at him in shock as I watch him take off the necklace he was wearing.

Our pieces put together made a fixed scarlet heart.

Prompt 135

“Please. All I ask is that you live and give me a chance to show you this world isn’t as ugly as you believe.”

My first attempt at drawing a hand. Any tips?

#girlpower 

she’s an inspiration.

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Dear Me

Dear Me,

How did you do it?

How did you become free?

I really hope you aren’t a spirit.

How did we get out of this pickle?

Where we’re the ones stuck in the middle.\Did we fight the fight?

Or just hold our fist in our mouth and bite?

What does it feel like to be free?

To be out of this “humble abode.”

Who did it appease?

Us or that monster we’ve named as our dark mode?

As I’m writing this letter,

I hope you will show me the way to go.

That someday all of this will get better

and that one day I can stop this freak show.

Dear me,

Please help me become free.

7/24/17

Strange as it may seem, I still hope for the best, even though the best, like an interesting piece of mail, so rarely arrives, and even when it does it can be lost so easily.

Lemony Snicket (via quotemadness)