Hey guys!
I know this is probably terrible timing, but I did want to let y’all know I’ll be taking a small break
or at least I don’t anticipate it to be long. My mental health hasn’t been the best, and I’ve got a lot of medical stuff I gotta take care of rn. So sorry to let y’all down like this. I’m super grateful for you guys, and I’ll do my best to be back soon.
Note: Some good news is that I’ll still be continuing my AO3 story tho! Since I only really plan to posting once a week, I think it won’t be too much on me. I also haven’t posted the link for it on here yet ’cause I’m still working through some stuff in chapter one.
Anyway, love y’all and stay safe 🤍
OOC: Have you ever written fanfic with Adam?? You rp him in a way that expresses his emotions and autism really well without infantilizing him or making him unfeeling and robotic, which is something I tend to see (they probably don't mean it in a harmful way, just misunderstood the character) and it's perfect! I really enjoy the way he's portrayed on this page, and I think the way you write in general is very pleasing
OOC: My god, this made me so happy to hear <3
I always try my best to immerse myself in his headspace.
And to answer your question—I’ve actually never really written fanfiction. Well, that’s not entirely true, because I kind of did with my girlfriend years ago 😭 (lol). I do write a lot, but I’ve never really put anything out there.
I have been thinking about maybe posting something on AO3 (may I be protected from the writer’s curse), but my biggest struggle is coming up with a storyline. Once I have a rough idea of where the story is going, I can fill in the details and start writing—but starting from scratch is kind of tough for me.
So if you have any ideas you’d like to see, please feel free to share! I’d love to take any suggestions into consideration.
Do you like theater? If so, what are your favorite plays and/or musicals?
I don’t dislike theater, but I struggle with the social environment around it.
It’s loud. It’s crowded. People clap too much. But I do like the mechanics of it the structure, the rhythm, the way a story has to rely on timing and restraint. I like plays that don’t talk down to their audience.
Copenhagen is a good one,it’s about physics and ethics. The Effect by Lucy Prebble was interesting too, mostly because it plays with psychology and perception in a way that felt grounded. Musicals are harder. Most are emotionally overstimulating, but I think Hadestown had merit. I like mythology. And I appreciate when something ancient gets recontextualized in a modern structure. That’s how understanding evolves.
Am I understanding this correctly? You have feelings for somebody?
I don’t mean Beth. I have read the ask you send to Hannibal.
Are you in love, Adam?
From what I gathered so far, it’s possible I’m falling in love.
However I want to avoid misreading things again.
I’m also still emotionally tied to Beth, and I haven’t fully ruled out the idea of reuniting.
Nigel, you’re the one I meant.
One advantage of communicating online instead of in person is that if something somebody says flusters or overwhelms you, you can just choose not to respond.
You can pretend you didn’t see it at all. I think that’s handy.
Being one of his patients, have you noticed anything odd about Hannibal Lecter ?
About Dr. Lecter ? No, I haven’t.
I haven’t been his patient for long, sometimes I talk to Franklyn in the waiting room. He usually talks a lot but he’s very polite and listens to me when I tell him about my interests.
However, I haven’t seen Franklyn in a while.
M94, Starburst
Is Nigel a Sheep or a Wolf ?
Nigel is a Human.
If you are asking what I think he’d be if he was an animal , which you should’ve worded more precisely , I think he’d be a dog.
But I can’t say for certain.
You need to dump Beth. She's an asshole.
Beth spends time with me. I don’t always understand her, but I think she means well…
Thought you’d be interested in this, stea. You think Keats was talking about Polaris? Can’t say I’m well versed on the subject. https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/44468/bright-star-would-i-were-stedfast-as-thou-art
— Nigel
Fomalhaut was the first star that came to mind. People call it the lonely one, and that feels closer to what Keats was describing—‘not in lone splendour hung aloft the night’—watching in silence like some sleepless, distant observer. Polaris is constant, sure, but Fomalhaut is solitary. It sits far apart from the other bright stars in the sky. Easy to notice. Easy to feel something about.
It makes sense to me, logistically too. Fomalhaut is visible from Earth without much effort. But more than that, it carries the weight of solitude, of being out there and unmistakably alone.
I don’t think he wanted to be the star. I think he recognized something of himself in it. When we admire things people, stars, it’s often because they mirror something we’re missing or trying to understand. Maybe he wasn’t longing for distance, but for connection. To feel less alone by seeing that loneliness reflected back.
And even if they’re separated by lifetimes of space, the star and the observer exist in that moment together. No one else might understand that connection, perhaps not even the two of them, but it’s there nonetheless.