You Must Believe That The World Is Going To Change. You Must Believe That You Can Change It. Not Alone,

hope is a skill

Howl’s Moving Castle lava lamp with emo Howl as the lava

over christmas when i came out fully to my mom she did tell me i was beautiful and gave me some of her old jewelry and told me she was excited to have another daughter and that was all wonderful, but the part that meant the most to me was when i told her "i want to get my facial hair taken care of sooner than later, the whole "girl" thing is a lot easier to swallow when im shaved" and she examined my use of the phrase "it's a lot easier to swallow" and said "Scout, I didn't have a good relationship with my mother. you know that." (i did know that, my grandma was NOT good to my mother) "but your grandma kim [friend of my grandma's, unrelated by blood in any way, but was adopted as a grandma through familial osmosis] was the greatest woman who's ever been in my life. and up until the day she died, she had a beard and a moustache [which is true, my grandma kim, a cis woman, had VERY thick facial hair]. if you kept your facial hair for the rest of your life i wouldnt think of you as less of a woman" and ya know what? THAT'S the part of her support that made me cry.

my grandma kim was an amazing woman and she had peach fuzz that she didnt give a FUCK about. and everyone loved her.

you can have your own fuzz too, and that doesn't make you not a woman.

I am Philosopher Under The Sea. Lord of the crepe. Bringer of Us retroactively. Fear me, for I'm just exceptionally good for you.

New tag game! I'll start:

I am Pluto. Lord of the lord. Bringer of the lord. Fear me for I am not in the same place.

@abscshshhd @aneptunicperson @breadinhaler3 @bonsai-is-a-bottle-of-oj @boughtmender @dykeden @eatin-bread-n-cryin @earth2enpysea @feathereye12 @fluffyyyfrog9000 @faerieofthenight @geooo0oo @happylittleduckboy @hansel-the-idiot @juan1dupree23 @kakashiwearingthegetaboshihat875 @mentally-tori-261 @oscar-cant-draw @rafareba @shortmomma1993 @themuseinthewoods @unnamed-enby @zithergilt

and anyone else I didn't mention who wants to join in

note: you don't have to use your real name. I just used my user, and you can too lol

stop playing it cool, just be passionate and intense and insane and whoever sticks around is meant for you

a good way to inspire yourself to do more is to see yourself as the wacky sitcom B plot character in your friends lives, "wouldnt it be funny to tell the friends in my phone about it." has gotten me to do anything from going to a festival (excelent) to wild camping (it went badly) (coastguard called) to trying to get the train to stonehenge (stonehenge costs money so i ended up just getting lunch in sailsbury, it was okay.) i bought a bicycle today and 20% of my reasoning was "itd be funny to surprise my roommate by coming home with a whole bike." . life is for living. and baby i live for the bit.

I love you ocean, I love you beach, I love you seashell, I love you fish, I love you moon, I love you sun, I love you stars, I love you mermaids, I love you ships, I love you sailors, I love you surfers, I love you weird deep sea creatures, I love you pearls, I love you fossils, I love you treasure chests, I love you houseboats, I love you anchors, I love you waves, I love you sea foam, I love you sea glass, I love you-

Solving conflict, not like a compromise or a "let's forget about this and move on", but really understanding why the other said or did what they said or did, and them understanding you, and both of you feeling closer and trusting the other more afterwards is one fucking amazing human experience.

I have a friend with whom I had a very sudden and painful conflict and she went no contact for 4 years, then she came back and asked to talk it out, and now it has been 10 years and how we solved this conflict got us so much closer.

But sometimes, there are some conflicts that will never get solved, some apologies we'll never get to make. Somewhere, someone is telling a story about what a dick you were, to a new friend, over a drink.

And I learned that it is ok. Conflict solving requires both parties being willing to try, the right timing, and sometimes some special communication and empathy skills. It cannot always work.

But when it does, and I get to understand myself and someone I love so much better thanks to it, it makes me so happy. I also trust people more after having even a minor conflict with them and see how we both handle it.

I'm grateful for all the conflicts that made me grow and feel loved and fought for afterward.