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Meu Bem Hinata Shoyo (crack, fluff, post high school, mutual pining)

Small droplets of sweat trickled down your forehead as you stood at the front of the classroom, your teacher attempting to hush the students.

“We’ve got a new student in the class..” Losing focus on her voice, all you could think of were how many pairs of eyes were glued to you; what were they thinking?

“..Are you fine with that? It won’t take you more than ten minutes.” She seemed to be questioning someone.

“But I have practice after school..!” He whined.

She turned to you with a smile, “You can take the open seat next to Hinata - he’s right down there.”

Walking down the rows, some students smiled, while others prepared their notebooks and pens. The boy you’d be sitting next to however, didn’t seem to be in the best mood; his brows slightly furrowed as he mumbled under his breath.

The day progressed, students swarming your table during the first break in an attempt to get to know you. Though despite how frustrated as he seemed, the boy didn’t leave your side even once.

“Okay everybody!” He said, breaking through the crowd and standing next to you, “We have something to do!”

He tugged at your wrist, guiding you outside the classroom where he proceeded to give you what you decided to call a ‘speed-run’ tour of the school. You both practically dashed through the hallway, avoiding the gazes of teachers who’d tell you off if they caught on - it would take too much time and spoil his plan to free up his afternoon for practice. It almost felt like he wanted to get away from you as soon as he could, but it probably wasn’t anything personal.

Remembering how it all played out really makes you laugh. It’s funny how much some people are able to change. The same person who used up his break to tour you around the school only so he wouldn’t have to do so later on in the day, was now the same person who stuck to you like glue whenever you were around him.

Third year hit, and plans for post-graduation were shared by you, who struggled to explain your choice to pursue further studies through a flurry of tears, after learning that he’d chosen to leave for a few years to train overseas. He promised to never leave you behind, and that just because you weren’t physically by his side, you were still in his thoughts. You couldn’t help laugh a little - he wasn’t exactly the best with words, but he always seemed to know how to bring you out of an overwhelming situation.

And now that he was halfway across the world, you found yourself feeling somewhat alone. Someone who you’d spent 3 years with suddenly disappearing so quickly - you didn’t know what you’d do. When so many parts of your day include him; it’s difficult to fill in the gaps where he once was. Having dinner at his place, hanging out with him after an exam, calling him when you couldn’t fall asleep; so many things changed faster than you were able to keep up with.

Though, despite being hours apart, you wouldn’t go a single day without hearing each other’s voices - whether it was over an audio or video call. You’d schedule your college classes and leave a gap in the early afternoon - around the time that he’d be heading to bed. He’d send you postcards sometimes, including small gifts and trinkets that he’d bought with the money he’d been saving up from his part time job. You noticed a shift in his handwriting as he explained he’d been learning to speak Portuguese, you couldn’t help but wonder what it’d sound like to hear him speak it.

Over call, he’d tell you about his matches, the things he does to train, his voice jittery with excitement - you’d need to warn him not to raise his voice otherwise he’d risk waking up his roommate.

Recently, the two of you spoke over the phone as you slipped under your covers, exhausted after a long day. You heard foreign voices in the background as he explained that he was at the gym. You recounted what you went through that day, telling him about all the things you’d learnt. Though you noticed that he’d been almost completely silent, save for an occasional ‘Really?’ or his typical ‘Huh?!’. When you asked if he really was listening, he promised he was - wryly confessing that he simply wanted to hear your voice.

“You’ll hear it in person soon enough.” You chuckled, warmth dressing your cheeks.

“I know, but it's just been so long!”

You weren’t sure how else to respond other than with a small laugh. Given how much time had passed, you couldn’t say you didn’t often wonder whether he really did miss you or not.

And in his typical fashion of leaving things until the last second, a message from him lit up your phone during a lecture. Tapping on it, you wondered if he’d had trouble sleeping - it’d be late night for him right now, wouldn’t it?

Wrong. His message stated that his plane would be landing in Japan in about an hour. He'd told you he was coming soon but he didn't say it would be this soon! Attached to his message was picture of a plane ticket that had only been delivered a few minutes ago due to his layover in a nearby country. As soon as you responded, he answered right back, telling you he wasn’t too far away. ‘You’ll need to find me!’ He typed.

‘Find me..’

It struck a chord with you for whatever reason. The lecture was now an afterthought as you stuffed your notebook into your backpack, rushing out of class and towards the subway station. You didn’t even worry about changing your outfit or applying any makeup.

All this time, you thought about how you’d been feeling lonely, and ever since he slipped from your grasp, things had felt a little.. different, and you had a hunch that he'd been feeling the same. All this time, you didn’t consider how isolated he was, living in an entirely different place, learning a new language, memorising the streets on his own; hours away from all the familiarities he grew up around. Hours away from you.

Small droplets of sweat trickled down your forehead as you stood at the arrivals terminal, voices that weren't his gathering around you. Rushing through the crowds, some families laughed, while others held each other tightly.

You stopped in the midst of your tracks as soon as you noticed a head of ginger hair scurrying through the different groups of people amidst all the chaos, his suitcase dragging behind him, his brows slightly furrowed as his eyes scanned the surroundings.

Breaking through the crowds, you managed to inch closer to him as he stopped in the midst of his tracks, his back facing yours as he fiddled with his phone.

You tugged at his wrist, your gaze shifting towards his head as he turned around, facing you with wide eyes.

"Found you.." You exhaled.

Within seconds, his arms were tightly wrapped around you, twirling you around. His laughter drowned out any background noise; or maybe it was just that you were simply only focused on him and his voice, and the way his arms held you so close - how much larger they were, how you never imagined they'd embrace you.

Your feet planted back onto the floor, hands still slung around his neck with your face nuzzled into his shoulder as gently rocked you back and fourth. "How long did you wait?".

"Not long. I was going to ring you," He replied, showing you his phone screen, "But you showed up all of a sudden!"

Reading the name on his phone, you wondered who he was talking about. "Meu.. Bem? Who's that?".

The chat logs under the name matched the ones you'd shared earlier that day - had he changed your contact name to something different? He sighed, dipping his head over your shoulder in an attempt to hide the growing redness in his face.

"It's you.."

Pro Hero, Pro Momma, No problem?

((TW: post partum issues, body self esteem issues, talk of breastfeeding, negative talk about self. Minors DNI.))

Katsumi was *adorable*. At 4 months, her carmine eyes had come in beautifully, and her full head of (h/c) hair, the same as yours swirled and spiked on her pretty little head.

She cooed as you fed her, for the 3rd time that night. Being an exclusively breast fed baby meant you were a milk machine 24-7.

Which also meant Katsuki was free to do his pro hero work at any time.

When he went back to work (a week. The workaholic went back on patrols a week after Katsumi was born. You were less than pleased.), you obviously had taken the brunt of...everything.

Sure, Mitsuki and Masaru visited and helped where they could- but you were the food source, the comfort, the *mother*. And at her age? Mom trumped everyone else.

However, the big day was about to happen. You were going to have a day to yourself, and Katsuki was going to take you out to dinner. Katsumi could take a bottle, thankfully-so she would be watched by Katsuki's parents.

You had taken a maternity leave from your pro hero work, so you hadn't really been outside (aside from Katsumi's doctor appointments) since her birth.

And it was nerve wracking. As you put her back in her bassinet, you couldn't help but worry.

What if you got engorged?

What if Katsumi was inconsolable?

What if she got sick?

What if she-

The door clicked open slowly. You sat up quickly, a hand hovering over Katsumi's sleeping form, ready to protect her.

"Relax. Its me." A familiar gruff voice said, unusually quiet. You let out a soft sigh.

"Katsuki. Geez." You sighed. He began to peel his costume off.

"I got about three hours of sleep I can get in before next patrols. So can you make sure the brat doesn't wake me up?" He asked, and you withheld your tongue.

As if you had gotten any consistent sleep the past months.

"Sure." You said quietly, settling back into bed. He ruffled your hair.

"Thanks. Night." He slipped in, and soon enough he was out.

You wanted to cry. Scream. Wring that stupid neck of his.

You took a breath. Maybe you shouldn't go out. Katsumi needed you here. Right?

No, you needed this. Everyone insisted.

So why did you feel so bad about it??

A few hours after Katsuki left for his agency, Mitsuki and Masaru came by to pick up Katsumi. As you adjusted her carseat once more, you began to explain things. You reached over, taking the bag you had packed that early morning.

"So here's three bottles and some frozen milk in case she wants more. Every three hours she gets like, about 5 ounces-so a full bottle, but she can eat more!" You said, handing Mitsuki her diaper bag, packed to bursting with everything you thought she might need. Mitsuki eyed the bag.

"This is....really heavy!" She chuckled, a bit suprised at the heft of it.

"Better overprepared than under!" You smiled. Masaru and Mitsuki looked at eachother.

"Right, well. We'll be off. Don't worry about a thing, (y/n)! She's gonna be just fine!" Mitsuki said, tapping the hood of their car.

Katsumi made a noise, and you flew to her side. "Oh, it's okay! You're gonna spend time with grandma and grandpop!!" You cooed, and Katsumi looked disgruntled. You frowned. "M-maybe...I can get her to calm down if I'm there-"

"(Y/n), relax!! You're running yourself ragged! Katsuki told us you barely even bathe! That's no good!" Mitsuki pushed her back to the door of her and Katsuki's apartment. "Just leave it to us! Katsumi's in great hands!"

"Okay. But my phone's on! And if I need to feed her instead of the bottle-"

Mitsuki closed the door. You stared at the door blankly, and heard the engine of their car roll away.

Well.

You stared down at the genkan, then shuffled a little. You gave a sniff in the air.

Oh. You smelled like milk, sweat and diaper cream.

Maybe...a bath couldn't hurt...

You hadn't really *looked* at yourself in the mirror for a hot minute. You stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror. Your eyes looked tired, baggy and slightly red. Your skin had dry patches all over, and was.. that a pimple?? Your hair was dull and dry, but that wasn't the worst of it. You backed up, looking at your torso.

Oh god.

Where there was once a toned stomach, now was soft. Squishy. And...what were those lines?!

Stretchmarks!? Well. That made sense. And your boobs?? Once decent and perky, now like pancakes, nipples cracked slightly. Breastfeeding did a number on them, that was for sure.

What had happened to the sexy, pro hero (h/n)?? You barely recognized yourself. You felt like a pile of flesh, flabby and used up. You found yourself squatting down, flopping on the small shower stool. You felt the rolls squish and undulate as you sat down, and you felt worse. You quickly showered yourself off, avoiding looking at the mirror. You didn't even want to look at your...nether regions. It probably wasn't too good-looking either.

As you set yourself in the tub, you couldn't seem to enjoy it. You felt like a cow, probably smelled like one, and you were certainly producing milk like one.

No wonder Katsuki worked constantly.

"No, stop that." You said to yourself. Katsuki wouldn't be so vain. And he *cried* when Katsumi was born. There was no way he wasn't happy with his new little family.

You tried to think positively. As you got out of the bathtub, you dried yourself off quickly, going to the bedroom.

You had been wearing pj's and lounge clothes for months. You wondered if you could fit into your regular clothes now.

You stared at your jeans. "I'm sure I can fit into these..." one leg in, and the other followed.

Tight. You struggled with the button. Did....did your hips get wider?? You were careful during pregnancy with what you ate, and stayed active. And even though you still had to eat more calories due to breastfeeding, you hardly ate junk.

But here you were, barely fitting into your old clothes before the pregnancy. Once you squeezed yourself in, you grimaced.

Muffin top city. Population? You.

You immediately shucked off the offending material. You threw open your closet.

Soon, piles of your pre-pregnancy clothes were piled on the unmade bed. You had slid down the closet door, naked and feeling even worse than before. Nothing fit right. You didn't even want to think about how your hero costume would fit once you came back from maternity leave.

Would anyone even take you seriously?

You felt awful.

You swallowed back tears, and slowly got up. You went to your dresser, picking out a nursing bra and your maternity underwear. You felt like a leaky grandma, with the granny panties covering your pooch, and the bra wasn't exactly meant for a sexy lift, either. You slipped in some nursing pads, and grabbed some maternity pants and one of Katsuki's tshirts.

You threw your hair up in a messy bun, and went off to pump the milk now making your breasts feel tight.

Katsuki found you on the couch, snoring away. He kicked off his boots in the genkan, looking up at the clock. 5:39. "...Babe?" He looked down at you, leaning onto the back of the couch.

He sighed. He knew you needed the break. You probably hadn't slept right in months. He went to pull over a blanket over you, until he saw two dark spots on your chest.

Uh oh.

"...Oi, (y/n), wake up. Yer leakin'." He said, shaking your shoulder a little. Your eyes fluttered open, and he smirked. "Hey. You got a situation." He pointed to your chest. You looked down.

Crap.

You felt your boobs and sighed. You were full. Again. "Let me...go pump. I'll be back." You sighed, throwing off the now soiled shirt and bra, turning away to go to the bedroom.

Katsuki looked. He smiled softly at you.

There was the woman who he fell in love with. The woman who was the mother of his child, who he watched become something even more amazing than a hero. A mom. He remembered it like it was yesterday. You, giving birth to his child-sweat, tears and blood, shouting only once or twice in exhaustion. You had held onto his hand like a vice, he had never seen such determination from you. Not even when you did your pro hero work.

You were a goddess. You were amazing. You were *his*.

Not once did he see the flaws as flaws. Stretchmarks were like his scars from his high school years. Badges of honor. Your softer form felt warm and so *right*. And your boobs? Well...he had often gotten unusually jealous of their daughter once or twice, let's just leave it at that.

You felt his eyes staring at you. You turned. "What?"

"I love you."

The room went silent. Katsuki usually only said those words when something big was going on. Like their wedding. Or when she told him she was pregnant. Or when Katsumi was born. It wasn't because he didn't love you, no-far from it. He was a man of action and little words when it came to romance.

You found yourself crying. You crouched to the floor. He went to you, wrapping you up in his arms.

You found yourself word vomiting.

You found yourself admitting to him all your pains, your dark thoughts, your feelings of inadequacy and self loathing. He didn't shush you. He just rocked you back and forth as you cried.

You didn't think motherhood would be so lonely, so...sad. You didn't know if your old self would come back or not.

"What're you saying? Of course it won't." Katsuki suddenly said. You blinked away tears.

"H-huh?" You stuttered.

"I mean...You're always gonna be you. But...you also changed. You have to. People change all the time. You just....changed in a bigger way. You're a mom now. You can't stay the same. But..." he sighed. "Youre...You're beautiful. You keep getting more and more beautiful, and I..." he rubbed his forehead, his other arm still holding you to his chest. "...I feel like I'm falling in love with you all over again." He mumbled, ears turning red. You found yourself blushing. He swallowed. "Look, I'm shit at words-you know that. But where you see all that crappy stuff, I see a warrior. The woman I fell in love with all those years ago back in U.A . I see who you've become-and I still don't get how you can make me act like a lovesick idiot, even now. Dammit, woman!" He huffed. "You don't even know what you do to me, and here you are, thinking you're some sort of fat cow?! That's not just insulting to you. That's insulting to me." He suddenly narrowed his eyes. "How dare you insult my wife and my child's mother."

You trembled. Suddenly, you felt that hot, gooey feeling in the pit of your stomach. He scooped you up, and you squeaked. "K-katsuki! W-wait! I'm top less and I gotta pump-"

"Oh. Don't worry about that, babe." Katsuki smirked. "I'll take care of that...". You blushed. As he walked into the bedroom with you in his arms, you suddenly realized what he meant.

Oh dear.

((Okay. This is purely self-indulgent. As a mom with a now 15 month old, I really poured myself into this. What reader is experiencing I totally felt, and still felt. I actually cried a little when I got to the self depreciation scene. Because that was me. It's still me. Post partum is a bitch. Motherhood tested me so much, and still does. It probably won't make much sense to you till you actually go through it, but it's crazy. Ironically, I was breastfeeding my kid while I wrote half of this. So...maybe this is also a love letter to myself and to any mom's on here still trying to find themselves. Also, you can't tell me Katsuki wouldn't be crying silent tears while holding his kid, you just can't convince me otherwise. Should I do a part two?))

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pyonpurin

4 months ago