Them: "I'll Always Care About You :)"

 “hi welcome to mcdonalds what can i get for you?”

“yeah can i get a deluxe quarter pounder with cheese?”

“absolutely, do you want the meal or just the sandwich?’

“uuuuuh hold on”

*fishes something out of my pocket*

“mikey what do i do?”

“get the fries. youll need the energy in the coming days”

*stuffs it back in my pocket*

“uhh yes please  the meal would be great”

need this on a t shirt

Accidentally wound up on "hear me out cake" tiktok, and I swear, if another one of these bitches puts down an at-most-unconventionally-attractive human man, Lady Dimitrescu or Nick Wilde/Robin Hood I am going to lose my fucking mind.

Saw one where the first person they named was Disney's Aladdin and I tapped out so hard I entered a fugue state and didn't regain full consciousness for like a solid hour.

A few of the more creative spellings of Christmas I’ve come across while looking for Dear Santa letters in old newspapers this year.

me when i reach out first: ewww they hate me im annoying i should leave them alone

when people reach out to me first: YAYY THEY REMEBER I EXIST I AM KNOWN AND I AM LOVED

@mrmederick

i forgot i had these too. dies