“For What It’s Worth: It’s Never Too Late To Be Whoever You Want To Be. I Hope You Live A Life

Really sick of giving my mom and sister my stuff and then them losing it

she’s distant! she’s incoherent! she’s sensitive! she uses escapism as a coping mechanism! she’s me!!!

life has made me so quiet. i just wanna listen. no more talking, no more explaining, no more begging. silence.

We are captives of what we love, what we desire, and what we are.

- Mahmoud Darwish.

When I was a kid, the "Oh my god, you got so big!" comment from grown-ups used to really annoy me, because it felt broadly infantilising. But now, as an adult myself, I realise it had very little to do with me, and almost everything to do with said grown-up feeling suddenly attacked by the passage of time, yet not wanting to blurt out "shit, fuck, I just pissed away like four years of my life without noticing, then, huh?" in front of an 8-year-old.

legit the best advice i can give you: feed your friends

any time someone is in any kind of crisis or upheaval, offer to feed them. tell them they don't have to choose what it is if they can't make decisions, just ask about allergies and preferences and tell them you're just gonna make food happen at their house.

friend having a baby? delivery gift certificate to order food to the hospital after the kid shows up.

someone's relative passes away? offer to make them dinner.

buddy gets laid off? ask if you can order them lunch.

pal stuck in a depressive episode? offer to drive them to fucking mcdonalds, if that's what they want.

people in crisis are tired and sad and angry and the last thing most of them are doing is thinking about feeding themselves. so if you have the ability or time or money, providing that is always, always a good move.

legit i do this all the time, and it is 100% always appreciated. i have taught all my friends that when something happens, we feed each other. it makes people feel extremely cared for, and I cannot recommend it enough.

i really can't get over how mitski captured how fear of your own imperfections can lead you to see yourself as unworthy of the people you love, and how that fear grows and consumes you if you let it until your self destructive tendencies spill over into your relationships, and when it's all gone and you're all that's left you can only blame yourself. the only heartbreaker.

the fact that I have to be in the “right headspace” to do even the simplest tasks. absolutely humiliating

My little revolution.

I believe this world needs more compassion. And why not start right here? With this next thought. With this next feeling. 

Can I just let it be exactly as it is?

“I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it.”

— Unknown