This Is The First In A Series Or Trans Stories I'm Willing To Share With The Internet, But It's About
This is the first in a series or Trans Stories I'm Willing To Share With The Internet, but it's about the first times I started to figure out I might be Trans!
When i was a young child, we used to have these neighbors that lived down the street. I tried being friends with the youngest of their family, who was still a few years older than me.
One day, we were sitting in the Den (like a livingroom that's one step lower than the rest of the house)(also maybe reffered to as a man cave)(I don't care) and I turned to the boy and asked
"Hey, if you didn't know i was a girl, would you be able to tell?"
I had started noticing that i had more "masculine" facial features (thicker eyebrows, broad shoulders, square face shape, my dad's big nose/forehead, ect.) At the time I was a little self conscious about this, but that didn't help the pang of hurt I felt when it was confirmed that I still looked "feminine"
Of course, he said "obviously," and we moved on, but for "some reason", I was deeply disappointed by this
This is just one of many dozens of stories I have like this
When I was even younger, i tried walking around the house Shirtless. No traing bra, no shirt, no bathing suit, nothing! I hadn't gone through any puberty, but that didn't stop my Dad and Brother from yelling at me! My argument was that they walked around shirtless all the time, why couldn't I? It's hot, let me take off my shirt too!
Nope! No, no, no. My mom had to quickly explain there's a difference between boys and girls and that I can't be shirtless, even around my family...
When i was in middle school (early teenage years for non Americans) I would dress more masculinly to "scare off anyone looking at my baby sibling" because I wanted to be a protective older brother
When I hit highschool, during the pandemic, I started experimenting with my hair and my freedom of expression. I buzzed it off at the beginning of lockdown so I could dye cool patterns into it, and as it grew out I kept the sides shaved and grew a mowhawk, dyed red ofc. But I had to attend classes again, with red liberty spikes, a black face mask, and new confidence. People in the hallways called me the "mowhawk guy". I wasn't even thinking about my gender identity at the time, yet I always felt this bubble of giddiness every time I heard about the "mowhawk guy" from my friends.
Maybe I was being made fun of, who knows, it made me happy
I've been mistaken for a man from behind, especially when I had shorter haircuts, and any time I heard someone call out "sir!" When trying to get my attention! I would live off of that high for weeks, if not months!
I started going by He Pronouns almost 2 years ago, but i told myself I was Genderfluid. I kind of used this as a crutch, so I didn't have to correct anyone...but I always have a secret preference for Masc Pronouns.
I've always shopped in men's clothing, the loose shirts didn't have corny slogans on them, the shirts weren't cropped, the jeans didn't hug anything, I liked the styles of old band tees and flannels...
Anyway, those are the times that stick out in my mind as the first few times I experienced Gender Dysphoria and Euphoria! Thank you for reading my ramblings, and if you have any stories of your own, please reblog and share! I love hearing about others experiences!
More Posts from Stupidlittlequeer and Others
In our house there are 4 light switches by the front door. All are in a line, together.
1 light switch turns on the light in the kichen
1 light switch turns on the light in the livingroom
1 light switch controls literally nothing, as far as we know it is not connected to anything
And 1 light switch will shut off power to the entire house, air conditioners, fridge/stove/microwave, wifi box, literally anything you thing might have some sort of electrical current to it will turn off and take a full minute to reboot
This sucks because WE (those who live in the house) know which switchs turn off the lights before we leave, but others will never know when they've just turned off our refrigerator...
(Also we have 2 fuse boxes. One outside the house that is not grounded and WILL electrocute you if you so much as brush against it, and one in mine and my fiancé bedroom)
Star-Ranger's Transgendered Galaxy, 2000
to trans men: you don't have to and can stop apologizing for being a man. it'll save you. you don't have to hate yourself for the approval of transphobic assholes like that. trans manhood is quite literally nothing to be ashamed of.
I come from a culture that has no nudity taboo - nudity is not considered inherently sexual, or somehow traumatising to witness. What that means in practice is that there is a clearly drawn line between sexual and non-sexual nudity. There is nothing wrong or inappropriate about nudity in a sexual context, and nothing wrong or inappropriate about nudity in a non-sexual context. However, it is 100% inappropriate to be nude in a situation where it is not obvious from context whether this is sexual or not.
I've seen random kids who briefly escaped from their parents bolt across a public park buck-ass naked after they were playing in the water fountain and their parents were in the middle of changing their kid from wet clothes to dry clothes when the small nudist escaped. Changing your small kid's clothes right there in public is ok because there is obviously nothing sexual about a child whose clothes got wet. But although people will have baby pictures of their kids in the bath or just running around the house like that because sometimes little apes hate clothes for some reason, it's considered common sense to not share those pictures on facebook mom groups and such, because you have no way of knowing who's seeing them, and that blurs the line of context.
It all boils down to the clearly defined context. Bathing nude in the same sauna with five of your co-workers at the office christmas party? Clearly nonsexual, therefore completely fine. Your friend-with-benefits inviting you to come over and opening the door in nothing but a doggy collar and the most porn-scented perfume? Clearly sexual, therefore completely fine. A woman checking her breasts for lumps in the gym lockers just before or after a shower? Clearly non-sexual, therefore completely fine.
But if you went to the bank today and there's some guy who walks in and immediately strips naked, doing his banking business wearing nothing but a deep smile and being clearly very content with this situation, you have no way of telling whether he's getting kicks out of this or not. There is no contextual reason for him to be nude. Therefore, that is inappropriate.
Then you go home and post on tumblr - as one does - going like "there was some dude completely fucking buck-ass naked in the bank today. That was fucking weird and I wish he had not done that." And someone immediately swoops into inform you that actually nudity is not inherently sexual or inappropriate, and there are cultures out there that have no nudity taboo. It's not fair to call somebody a freak for something like that, maybe that guy was just finnish.
Trans tips #2!
To help with voice dismorphia, practice voice training!
I heard of voice training from a Trans woman on tiktok whom I only know as ellierellie. She brings up thr point that when people first transition, have can have a very unnatural and soft voice, almost like a stage voice.
Her tip is to project your voice to make it sound more natural! My favorite way to do this is to blast my music and sing in the deepest voice i can manage as loud as I can.
The volume of the music helps to cover the sound of your voice to make it more comfortable to talk louder. My favorite music to do this with is 70s/80s/90s rock! Lynyrd Skynyrd, Kiss, The Rolling Stones, ect. I also like to throw in some Hoizer, Arctic Monkeys, Cigarettes after Sex, and The Neighborhood!
I have my personal favorite songs for voice training, but I recommend avoiding songs where the singers voice pitches up or becomes whiney (i don't know how else to describe it, most sad music will have a cord or two where the singer cries out in a higher pitch voice)
I also recommend listening to music by singers of your preferred gender for this! I still enjoy my girly-pop early 2000s music but I often sing it in a mock-high pitched voice to make me feel better about my own voice...also, it's just fun!
You can look up good tutorials for voice training on YouTube! My method is just one of many, but it's the one that works best for me!
Trans tips #4!
Reframing how you talk to/about yourself!
I talk to myself alot! Okay maybe not TO myself but I have a weird habit of narrating everything I am doing in my head to myself.
One thing I have to make a conscious effort to do is to use my preferred name in my head. Often I'll have my narration going on and I'll have to interrupt it to use my preferred name
Same goes for my Pronouns!
Example from today: "(Deadname) turned the ignition off, grabbing her keys and taking a deep breath before opening the door- no, wait, LI grabbed his keys, and reached for the handle of his door, ready to go to work..."
It's okay to make mistakes, and to have hiccups, it doesn't make you any less Trans!
Maybe I should stop taking to myself but I digress!!!
The other thing i do is i reword how I refer to myself, my body, my clothes, ect.
I started referring to my bras, which I use as binders, as harnesses. Idk why but this makes me feel much better about myself.
I don't own boxers as of right now as an obligatory Broke Collage Student BUT I stopped calling my undies Panties and call them Undies. I hated the word panties anyway so whatever! I also wear alot of loose horror t-shirts and cargo pants with docs (in case you wanna know how I dress for some reason!) So no renaming there!
Onto my body, right now I sit at a C cup, so no flat chest here, but I still call it my chest and my pecks, and I try to avoid saying Tits, Boobs, ect. They are my pecks and bitches be jealous of my big soft pecs!
Reframing how you refer to yourself can help a little bit with dysphoria! Remember that you got this and do what works for you, this is just what works for me!
Messaging people for the first time is so hard. What am I supposed to say? Like, "You seem really odd and your blog intrigues me. Do you want to have philosophical conversations or perhaps talk about fictional characters?" What! Whatever. I will just follow you back and stare at your blog with my big beautiful brown eyes.
wiselittlequeer*
(Your trans tips made us smile. Thank you.)
THANK YOUUUUU!!!!
I try and post untraditional advice and tips that might help more then the usual "eat, sleep, take your meds, drink water" ect ect. So I'm glad to see people actually enjoying and interacting with my content!
this is also prolly a good time to mention...I have absolutely no clue how to operate a picrew thingy whatever it is
i dont even know if I have access to it 😭
and also my Tumblr acc doesn't let me DM so I'm here 😭
And I didn't even see this ask! I'm so sorry it took so long for me to reply!
You click on this! It's the big, bold, underlined caption that says "The Picrew" under the first image
Apparently, it's an embedded link that opens the pic crew icon designer website, so if you just click on those words it should let you make yours!
Once you finish, hold down on the picture and it'll let you download it or copy to your clipboard
Then you can reblog with yours!
I'm excited to see what you'll make, lol!
the world is a better place with trans men and transmasc people in it
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Li He/They/It Absolutely Unapologetically Dedicated to the most Beautiful Woman to have ever Existed
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