I Dont Trust Those Motherfuckers Who Are Like. 'ohhh You Should Never Do Xyz In Your Art. You Should

i dont trust those motherfuckers who are like. 'ohhh you should never do xyz in your art. you should never draw eyebrows or eyes over the hair you should never shade with black you sjould never blah blah blah' FUCK YOUUU WHY DO YOU HATE JOY AND WHIMSY AND FUN

More Posts from Thecatwitch and Others

2 years ago

I'm confused I thought blimps were a mutated hot air balloons

ok but have you ever seen a parked blimp?

Ok But Have You Ever Seen A Parked Blimp?
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why is this so goddamn funny

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2 months ago

I'm really hoping that mystreet season 7 comes out on the 10th anniversary of season 1. Its coming out later this year and I feel like it would make lot of sense.

Plus the vary quick run down of MCD season 1 fells more like it's trying to get aphmaus current audience to watch mystreet and diaries so that they'll watch season 7


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1 year ago

If you live in the US and have fallen on hard times, please call 211 for assistance. They can connect you with an agency that does rent assistance and many other resources.

2 years ago

I'm doing better than you. Your just spray paint on a wall

thecatwitch - A_cat_pretending_to_be_a_witch
2 years ago

its equivalent to saying lol when keeping a straight face

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This is the most fucked up tag you can put on a joke post. No exclamation point, all lowercase, nothing. You’ll never know if this is sarcastic or genuine. I don’t know if they hate me or they liked the post, I just don’t know.

1 year ago
Water Witch 🌟

Water Witch 🌟

Water Witch 🌟
1 year ago

I don’t get it, man. why. why do we have to homogenize everything. why does every product have to look and behave and feel the exact same way. why can’t tumblr maintain its individuality? why can’t it lean into the things that make it a unique and refreshing offering instead of scrambling to make it a carbon copy of twitter? sucks, man. sucks.

1 year ago

it's been said before and i'm sure said better than i can phrase it. but really, really - if you like making "i'm going to kill myself" jokes, please try switching to being ironically conceited instead.

anytime something goes wrong, say things like "ah well at least i'm beautiful and charming and everyone loves me." when you forget something, try "my big huge brain is so smart and thinking about too many other very big wizardly thoughts you wouldn't even understand." when you're frustrated by one of your symptoms, start talking like you're in My Immortal. "Life has come for me but my eyes are beautiful pools of gorgeous fire and my hair is amazing. I stuck my middle finger up at life and told it to fuck off and it did."

just... try it for a month or two. try saying the most absurdly self-congratulatory shit you can think of.

i know it's tempting to make suicide or self-harm jokes. and for me at least, a decade ago (!) when someone suggested i stop making those kinds of jokes, i was kind of at a loss for what to replace them with. i wanted to make light of these moments, but genuinely (at the time) my first thought really was suicidal ideation. there was a part of me that even felt like ... i was kind of "making light" of that voice. that if i could say i want to die lol, it would help take the sting out of that genuine (albeit passive) desire. like i could turn my illness into a joke.

when i started complimenting myself instead, it felt awkward and stupid. it felt really, really ironic. what i was actually saying was nobody would ever think this stuff about me, that's what makes it so fucking funny.

but. the effect was immediate. first thing i noticed was the people around me. when i dropped a glass and said ah my skin is too beautiful and sleek the glass has swooned and broken for me, other people were suddenly overjoyed to jump in with the joke. rather than making an awkward moment, we'd both start cracking up. ah princess sleek hands, i've heard of you.

i was 19. i hadn't noticed i'd been making others tense when i said i want it all to end. i know now that it's incredibly hard to know how to walk that moment - do you talk to them about your concern? do you potentially make them uncomfortable by asking if they're okay? do you ignore the situation? do you help them pick up the glass, or do they need to do it by themselves? are they genuinely made suicidal over this small moment? and most importantly, how do you - without professional training or supplies - actually help?

most people want to help you pick up the glass in your life, they just have no fucking idea how to do it. they don't want to make anything worse. they don't want to make assumptions about you. they love you, they're scared for you - and being scared makes people kind of freeze up. it's not because they don't love you. it's because they do.

now when something bad happens, my first thought is how can i make a stupid joke about this. it isn't my brain saying you're a dumb fucking bitch. i spend more time laughing. i spend more time being gentle with myself. i spend more time feeling good.

and the thing is - what's kind of funny - is that you'd be surprised by how many people agree with you. the first time i said i'm too pretty to understand that, someone else said to be fair you're the prettiest person in this room. i promise - you really don't know how kindly your friends see you. but they love you for a reason. they sort of reverse-velveteen-rabbit you. your weird and ugly spots fade away and you just become... the love they want to give you.

go love yourself ironically. the worst thing that happens is that you end up tricking your reflection into actually loving you.

1 year ago
Reblog To Kill It Faster

Reblog to kill it faster

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thecatwitch - A_cat_pretending_to_be_a_witch
A_cat_pretending_to_be_a_witch

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