Latest Posts by totally-correct-ofmd - Page 2
Stede: And now it's time for some witty back and forth banter!
Izzy: [screams with rage]
Stede: I don't know where to go with that.
Jim: [sneaking around, trips and falls]
Spanish Jackie: Who's there?!
Jim: Nobody, fuck off!
[on the crow's nest]
Stede: This is where I come to cry.
Ed: What?
Stede, sweating: I said this is where I come to be a cool guy.
Izzy, plotting revenge step by step:
1. ?
2. ?
3. ?
4. ?
5. And then they'll all be sorry.
[first day as a pilot]
Control Tower: What are your coordinates?
Ed: I'm by a cloud that's shaped like a lion.
Control Tower: Can you be more specific?
Ed: simba
Stede: What's with the napkin on the glass door?
Oluwande: The Swede keeps walking into the door, so I thought this would help.
The Swede, entering the room: Oh, wow! A floating nap-
The Swede: [walks into the glass door]
Lucius: I have an empty notebook and no idea what to put in it. Any suggestions?
The Swede: Put spaghetti in it.
Lucius: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone except you.
Roach: Put spaghetti in it.
Lucius: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone except-
Frenchie: Put spaghetti in it.
Lucius: I am current-
Wee John: Put spaghetti in it.
Lucius: i am not longer taking suggestions
Fang: Comin' outta my cage and I been doin' just-
Izzy: FUCK
Blackbeard: I thought I was meowing back and forth at the cats for the last hour.
Blackbeard: Turns out, it was just me and Stede meowing at each other back and forth from different parts of the ship.
Black Pete, standing on the dinner table: This place has gone to HELL!
Stede, to Ed: He does this once a week.
[first few episodes]
Blackbeard: Any word about Bonnet and his crew?
Izzy: They found a dollar on the ground and almost killed each other because there was a vending machine nearby.
Stede: What are you doing?
Frenchie, taking a Buzzfeed quiz to see what kind of Poptart he is: work
Roach: That's one of my biggest fears.
Lucius: What is?
Roach: If I ever, like, woke up as a donut...
Lucius: You'd eat yourself?
Roach: i wouldn't even question it
Blackbeard: Hey, Stede-
Stede: [crying softly in front of the TV]
Blackbeard: Oh, did the documentary mention another bird that mates for life?
Stede: [nods]
Stede: We call that a traumatic moment.
Stede, turning to Frenchie: Not a 'bruh moment'.
Stede, turning to Black Pete: Not a 'major L'.
Stede, turning to Jim: And definitely not an "OOF LMAO".
Stede: Sometimes, people ask me how I manage my crew so easily. The answer is, I don't.
Stede: Yesterday The Swede called me into the kitchen and when I got there, Roach shot me in the throat with a Nerf gun.
Stede: Oh, the sweet irony of his death. He was designed for this life- yet never meant to endure it.
Ed: What happened?
Stede: i dropped a goldfish cracker in the bathtub
Stede: It's like the bad guys always know where we are!
Lucius: Stede, did you remember to set your Twitter location to private?
Stede:
Lucius: You set it to private, right?
Stede:
Lucius: stede
[group chat]
Black Pete: I'm tired of all you fake Ratatouille fans thinking the rat's name is Ratatouille.
Frenchie: Please, I only said that once.
Jim: It's 3AM. Fuck OFF.
Lucius: Pete with the right opinions as always.
Stede: THE RAT'S NAME ISN'T RATATOUILLE?!
[Stede has been removed from the chat]
Black Pete: I've had it.
[planning to attack another ship]
Stede: So what's the name of the target?
Frenchie: The cat's name is Oreo.
Stede: That's not what I asked.
Frenchie: That's what I know.
Stede: I made you a playlist! It has some songs I know you like, but I threw in a few yeehaw type jams 'cause you're a yeehaw type person!
Ed: I'm a what?
Lucius, not looking up from his book: He said you're a yeehaw type person.
[family game night]
Lucius: You know, you're getting a little too old to play Twister.
Stede: Nonsense, spin the wheel!
Lucius, sighing: Right hand red.
Stede: [pulls every muscle in his body]