Turbopropic - Scottie

Bob Dylan is really such a funny dude to exist. you’re a teenager who’s really obsessed with this one folk musician. ok. normal. then you hear said folk musician is in the hospital and what do you do? drop out of college and travel all the way from minnesota to new york to see him. and while you’re there you might as well become a folk singer yourself. okay sure. you sound a little weird but damn can you write. you get signed to a record label. record an album. does pretty well. record another album. does really well. now you’re famous. you go on tour in the uk. you sing at the march on washington. you release another album, and another. you’re the spokesman for a movement, for a generation. you’re a poet. you’re a golden child. thing is, you hate all that. so you learn electric guitar and everyone else hates all that and boos you and you cry but who cares? they can keep booing you, you’re still bob dylan. you keep going with this electric thing. someone calls you judas but at least you’re not christ. oh yeah and you’ve been on and off with the second most famous folk singer of your generation. well that’s over now. you marry someone else. you get in a motorcycle accident. finally a fucking break. you don’t appear in public again until woody guthrie (remember woody guthrie?) dies and you perform at his memorial concert. you change up your musical style. you make friends with george harrison. you’re not getting good reviews but who cares? youre bob dylan. you act in a film. sure. you go on tour again. you’re having problems with your wife. you go on tour again but this time it’s this vaudeville thing and everyone’s on drugs. joan baez is there in drag as you. you make this weird, bad, half-improvised film where you’re there with your ex and your wife. everyone has signed up for these psychological mind games and no one wins. you convert to evangelical christianity. everyone hates it. you drop it. you release some of your most negatively reviewed music. you form the greatest supergroup of all time. great. you have a resurgence in popularity. even better. you get a nobel prize. you don’t even show up to claim it. you’ve been considered one of the greatest musicians of all time for sixty years. they make a movie about you. it stars one of the biggest actors of the day. and now over sixty years after you dropped out of college and traveled to the east coast, people are writing fanfic of you getting topped by johnny cash.

John Waters, Female Trouble (1974)

who up getting really sad about david lynch again

why would u want 2 b the most fuckable person in the grocery store when u can b the most 'buying groceries fast and going home' person in the grocery store

i think i could kill elon and get away with it personally

Wonders never cease

[Gesturing furiously at the section of the history books about the rise of fascism]