1d8 Bludgeon + Str. Bludgeoning

Wait a minute if elves take a hundred years to grow up that has some weird implications.

So… if we say a human comes of age in fantasy worlds at 16, that means it takes an elf 6.25 years to age one human year. If we say the age of maturity is 18 that’s 5.55 years.

So then… okay with people that live a long time have to see their human friends die and probably see them like pets yeah that’s been explored to death. But what about a human just seeing their friend not grow up?

An elf toddler and a human toddler become friends at a playdate. At the time the human is two and the elf is 13. Emotionally the elf is just a little older than the human. But then the human grows up. He grows up and as he grows up his friend doesn’t. Not much, anyways.

She’s still sucking her thumb and throwing tantrums the entire time that he grows up. When he reaches the age where he’d choose a trade or go to an academy he’s earning extra money by babysitting her. During his initiation into adulthood on his 18th birthday she’s there with her parents holding a stuffed animal. Later that afternoon he sees her being shown some colorful flashcards with letters of the elvish alphabet on it by her father.

The human gets older. He learns how to fight, he goes from town to town getting work. At some point he joins the army. Every time he visits his hometown he has at least one more scar and by the time he’s 30 and the elf girl is mentally seven by human standards she starts to understand that something is wrong. Even after he settles down to be a home maker for the local blacksmith something feels wrong.

And she watches him grow old. When she’s in her 80s she babysits his grandchildren for extra cash after school, coming over in her school robes and ruffling his hair. She doesn’t remember why she became friends with this human or when but a strange sense of jealousy fills her heart.

Now she realizes it. She realizes it too late, on the day her friend learns that he is dying. The first day of her 100th year and the start of his last. Humans’ lifetimes may only last for the childhood of an elf if they’re lucky, but they learn so fast. They do so much. They cram their days full of love and hate and learning and wonder.

He knew this was coming. He knew all of this decades before she did, because elves are slow. Not stupid, certainly not stupid, but very very slow. She holds her old friend’s hand as he lays down on his bed. A man that has led such an ordinary life but feels so extraordinary to her. Because he has always, always been there and now he just won’t. Because in her eyes he became so wise so fast and now he’s just gonna be gone.

On an elf’s 100th birthday they are allowed to choose a new name for themselves. It can be important, or not. Usually it will follow them until the end of time. She stands in front of her family’s elders and is asked what name she will be called from now on.

She names herself after him.

A great insult for a piece of literature: "drier than a stale loaf of bread."

For the trans community 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️

Carina

Fun fact: the 8 hour work day is a rather recent concept.

Meaning, prior to that, people (on average) worked less per week. But I'm guessing it heavily depended on the person and the work demand

Imagine that: Joseph the scrib only worked 6 hours today, writing only 4 pages of this massive tome he's a part of doing.

Why 4 pages? The prep work for each page and the quills, the slow process of writing each word, and scratching out each mistake as they happen.

On the flip side, Nathaniel the local blacksmith is living in the shop all day and night because of the backlog of orders and repairs. He had to hire a couple apprentices to help and he's still behind.

Mat is a painter and he wasn't feeling it for the last week, so he's been causing havoc at the local market; putting things in the wrong booths which confuses the hell out of customers and annoys the merchants.

The best bug is a dead bug

Can Biden or Harris speak to this?

Seems calling Nazis a Nazi is unpopular with the journalists and headline writers.

Make them quote you. Call them Nazis.

Fascism is here. Start punching Nazis.

I doubt AI can compare to the years of madness that a writer can go through for the sake of a series.

My universe has permanently altered the way I spend my free time. I've done drawings of just about every character and have plans drawn for every unique item with such detail that I can pick it up years later and build it with much thought.

AI can not imitate that level of devotion to something that's was thought up almost a decade ago.

More medieval dyes for y'all!

Oh, I've written books on several topics... they're more like encyclopedias in a tutorial format that read like a super long YouTube video.

I'm a prime example of what happens when autism is allowed to go off and pointed in one direction

req'd by @ironboulderfan

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, START. YOUR. ENGINES.

text: the sheer velocity of my autism is unmatched

How to use Tumblr:

Like Twitter without the character limits, and no one went "um actually"

Like reddit, just there's more like the cafeteria and less of a classroom

Like Facebook, if you didn't care.

Express yourself! Shitpost! Be an idiot! Just remember that nothing matters, and we're all here for the same reasons... and we forgot all of them