Dive Deep into Creativity: Discover, Share, Inspire
Fortifying not only makes you a happier person all around, but is also what permanently relieved me of my lack of confidence (and, to a lesser degree, my self esteem issues). Like many others, I felt like I was a barely functional product that was just barely able to make it through life. But truth is, as I kept proving the more I reviewed myself in different situations, that I was incredibly capable of dealing with actual problems. And so are you. You just have to look out for ACTUAL problems, which are easy to ignore, and stop looking at the imaginary problems that we love to give attention to.
Actual problem: My bike trie fell off and I didn't have my phone with me. (Solution, which I did not recognise myself doing until much later): Drive the remaining length to my destination, ask for someone's phone and call someone who could help pick me and the bike up later.)
Imaginary problem that same day: My voice is shaky, isn't it annoying for other people to listen to? ("Solution": Akwardly stop talking with this person who is interested in hearing what you have to say. Imagine if they started disliking you.)
So fortify yourself if you are worried, and focus on the small solutions you come up with everyday. You are the god of problem-solving, and this next trick to avoiding self-pity is all about that:
Understand who you are. That may seem like a tall order, but it's easier than you think. You are a human. You may think humans come from all sorts of weird places, but if you can't accept evolution, I mean, I don't know how you found yourself in my blog in the first place, cuz I don't dumb these things down for my readers. So we are fancy monkeys, less hair, more stamina, bigger brain, the works. What about it? Well, what are we meant to do? That's right! It's time to answer the meaning of life (kinda). I will argue that, by looking at our bodies, we can to a degree figure out what we are meant to do. Let's take a look at a cheetah. Cheetahs go fast. like 100kmph or 60mph fast. That's impressive, and you would have to assume that, on some level, the Cheeta is 'meant' to go fast. Let us now look at the humble dog. The dog is a wolf, but for humans! They are rounder, slower (both physically and mentally), cuter and much less scary. The dog is meant to be our pets! And it wants to be, too! Now for the human.
The human is.... uhh... well.. For starters, we have a straight back. Why? Because we have 2 legs. Why? Because we have 2 of our limbs as arms. These can move far more freely than our legs. Why? So that our hands can reach things in all sorts of ways. Why do they need to do that? Because humans are dynamic. We constantly try to one up ourselves and each other, and we don't just have one unique mechanic for one purpose. Right now, you are deriving meaning (hopefully) from looking at pixels on a screen that display the right photons in the right patterns to make this "g", and your brain is not only proccessing those symbols, getting meaning from them, but you may also write something yourself, where your brain both thinks what it wants to convey, turns it into a sentence, THEN makes your fingers press on buttons on a plastic board until your idea exists somewhere other than your mind. What?? That's an insane concept to think about! Armed with this knowledge, I challange you to ask yourself the next time you find yourself in a scary or unpredictable situation: "How am I gonna get out of this one??", because that's litterally what your mind is meant to do. That's right! The meaning of life is to solve problems?? Eh, maybe not, but it's probably a small part of the puzzle, so don't throw the idea out, okay?
With that, you should be well on your way to complain less, both to yourself and others. Remember to fortify and celebrate the small victories that you give yourself.
Love, Anthony.