A Wayne Family Trip To Metropolis

THIS IS INCREDIBLE IM GONNA BE THINKING ABOUT THIS ALL DAY

urinetown beach day headcanons!

"but that was 2 days ago"

SHSHSHZHSHSHZSHZHSHHS

SHUSH

okay so i think the concept of the beach in urinetown is really interesting because there's a drought.

but the beach would still like...have to be a thing because oceans dont just dry up

so i think it would be really interesting to observe the change in who attends the beach. because you'd need a car to get there- accessible beaches are probably much further away than normal

the beach becomes an elitist thing. only rich people go to the beach. it's a luxury

so when cladwell is like, "hey, i'm going to the beach", hope is like "say more right now."

she refuses to go unless bobby can go with her, "it's my road or the high road daddy"

which then leads to mrs. pennywise getting in on the beach trip, which then leads to the poor tagging along

lockstock sees this and goes "poor people going to the beach? it has to be a coup. i'm going to follow behind them to make sure nothing bad happens."

cut to barrel squeezed into the passenger seat already in his beach clothes and a flamingo pool floaty around his waist

little sally somehow ends up in the backseat and no one notices she's there until she wakes up from her nap halfway there and almost jumpscares lockstock to driving off the road.

and that's how caldwell b. cladwell ends up taking an entire gang of strange, ragamuffin-like bumbling idiots to the beach with him (and his entourage ofc ofc, i just KNOW ms. millenium serves cunt at the beach)

mr. mcqueen is afraid of the water, and the sand, and anything beachy, he hates it. he does paperwork at the beach, and then starts crying when sand gets on it

bobby makes sure hope reapplies her sunscreen like the world will end if she doesn't

meanwhile, he forgets his own and burns like a fucking piece of dry grass

they're not there for twenty minutes and the poor have already buried tiny tom up to his neck in the sand

little sally scares them all by floating in the water and pretending she's dead multiple times

barrel looks like he's ready to go swimming for the entire day, but then a single piece of algae touches his foot within the first hour and he immediately taps out

lockstock's like "ooo i'm gonna do my cop job at the beach, i'm gonna guard the rich people" and then immediately conks out on a towel

fipp is surprisingly good at skipping rocks

hope brought all the snacks, and she shares, serves, and slays.

hot blades "i know how to swim (and then almost drowns)" harry

little sally builds a really good sandcastle and then barrel kicks it and she throws sand in his eyes

the poor bury lockstock in sand while he's sleeping like they did with tiny tom

hot blades "you mean there's been water this whole time!? (tries to drink it and throws up because he didn't know it was salty)" harry

little becky spends a lot of time looking for sea shells because she think they'll make nice room decor for when her baby arrives

cladwell reads his book the entire time and pretends his day isn't being ruined by the chaos of what he tried so hard to forget about

bobby strong thinks that he's going to be eaten by a shark and it takes him an hour to coax him into the water

the only swimming concept that poor man can grasp is a pitiful doggy paddle

everyone is fast asleep on the drive home and it's the most peaceful quiet thing you could possibly imagine.

Proshippers are NOT WELCOME on my blog. kindly fuck off

Why the fuck is there a proshipper in the Urinetown fandom get out of here we don't welcome you

Do y’all know where the phrase “eat the rich” comes from or do you just repeat it cause you heard it elsewhere?

It’s not a bad thing, I just saw someone say “we never said who would eat the rich” and realized a lot of y’all might not have heard the full quote

It’s from Rousseau and it’s “When the people shall have nothing more to eat, they will eat the rich"

And, well, there’s a lot of people with nothing to eat…

HI CARL I LOVE YOU!!!!!

Dudes healthcare is so fake. My ADHD meds are $940 without insurance. But they gave me a website of "coupons" which straight up looks like a scam website, and I got it today for $60! Just a coupon from a random website and it was $900 cheaper. America, I am confusion!! America explain!!

Yta

Your days are numbered Lockstock. You can’t hide forever.

aita for killing this lady's husband and son? they broke the law so I had to throw them off a building and now she wants to kill me. that's not fair :(

My blog is inclusive for people of all genders and sexualities!! <3

Please Reblog is Your Blog is Safe for Non-Binary People.

If my mutuals can’t rb this then we can’t be mutuals

The Rat.

guys.

this is a post about a rat. now lets see how big we can get it before ratdetector13 finds it. share it with as many people as you can but not them, and don't add any rat tags.

CLOSING NIGHT HAPPENED AND WE PISSED SO HARD FOLKS!!! WE ATEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

im not saying my exact place (bcs privacy) but i got decently high! :DD