Caalowrites - Ca Alo Writes

Modern Commentary on Joan Didion's "On Being Unchosen By The College of One's Choice"

The previous Fall I committed to a college abroad, ran by an American university. The American school is a big name, and wanting the prestige and experience abroad, I chose it over much safer options within my state. A year later and things haven't exactly worked out; thanks to COVID, I haven't actually been to school in the entirety I have enrolled, and that also means enduring classes in a different time zone. So, naturally, I am transferring universities. Again, the rat race for prestige has taken over my life, moreso now than before because I know where my high school peers have gone.

Going to college in the Information Age is surely a dimension of hell. From Instagram to LinkedIn, everyone I know and have ever stalked has posted about their resume, selective summer programs, and even future plans. I'm an orientation advisor for first year students, and some of my kids have multiple universities in their biographies, to showcase the many schools they got into.

Maybe I'm bitter, because a lot of this college crap is very classist in nature. Transferring has made me think a lot about what prestige and early success mean to me, and truth be told, I wouldn't mind going to a little-known school in a small town, with little old buildings and professors that you can talk to. Maybe I'm just romanticizing simplicity because I am tired of the rat race, and I really just want to feel a connection to my actual studies, not to my resume.

I picked up Joan Didion's book, "Let Me Tell You What I Mean," before leaving the American campus of my school last Spring. I had dormed there while studying online, because the time zone is lesser than it is at home. In a big city university with no actual school friends, Joan Didion made me feel less isolated than even before the pandemic.

Her essay is a time capsule into college admissions past, when you could accept your peers successes, even when you didn't reach those heights yourself. (Joan mentions suicidal ideation after a Stanford rejection, but later mentions writing essays for her friends at Stanford.) I attribute this to not seeing a "I am so excited to announce..." post on her teenage feed every day. I am going to make the assumption Joan was intelligent in her earliest days, even if it took many years before she reached a mastery of writing. In today's expectations, a woman of her caliber taking community college classes after striving and failing for Stanford, is terribly uncommon.

Still, when I think of what I envy most of Joan, from aspriring-writer to writer, it's her mastery of her craft. The little community college she attended must have contributed in some way to her success, as has every small opportunity she got her hands on. These, we know, did not include Stanford or ivies or any of the dynastic, old American universities that use the money of their nepo baby student body to attract the few geniuses that roam their campuses.

In the end, I’m glad Didion went to Berkeley, because when she says she went there, we all know that means she got into Berkeley.

September 2022 - Reflections of a month

Things I Wish I Used In A New York Winter

This past winter I studied in NYC for university, which most of you may know from previous posts. I cannot say that I truly loved or hated New York (a review on the city coming soon) but I will say that as the Fall turned to winter, I learned the importance of dressing for the weather. In my hometown on the West Coast, dressing poorly for the weather bares the consequence of you being slightly cold in 60 F weather or slightly warm in 90 F weather. Unless you are out in the nighttime, in which case you would only be slightly more uncomfortable. In New York, dressing poorly for the weather (especially as a commuter student/worker) means you have to walk between buildings with cold fingers and chilly air breezing through your jeans. Without much of the proper attire pre-planned, I found myself in a pickle as the cheapest department stores were sold out of gloves and thermal leggings. I ended up buying online, but had to suffer 40 F weather for an additional week 'till my stuff arrived. Lesson learned: Don't be like me! Anyways, here are my most recommended winter items for people studying in cities with cold winters. They are geared more towards women, but of course, I think anyone can wear whatever they like.

A Balaclava - Heat escapes from your head! A solid beanie is work appropriate for people not looking to make a scene, but I think balaclavas are even better because they cover your ears and face, too.

Knit Balaclava $23 - Etsy - shorturl.at/lHIT3

Recycled Cashmere Beanie $44 - Nordstrom - shorturl.at/ehlo3

Side Note: The bright blue options on both of these is an excellent way to brighten up your day and soothe passer-byers on your daily stroll.

A Real Wool Coat - I cannot emphasize enough the *real* part of real wool. It bothers me so much to see brands charging $200-300 for wool blend coats that are mostly plastic anyways. You can find them for $500+ on Nordstrom, or search for them secondhand on Etsy, Mercari, and Postmark for the best sales.

Touchscreen Gloves - A no-brainer is to cover your thinnest limbs from frostbite and the general cold. I recommend touch-screen gloves so you will actually use them and not disrupt your daily feed-scroll on the way to class.

Water Repellant Touchscreen Gloves $25 - MUJI - shorturl.at/iryCJ

A Warm Perfume - Buying yourself a new bottle of perfume is such an ingenious way to brighten up the dull winter months. You don't have to buy yourself a full-bottle either--I just bought a travel size and I've barely made a dent since November (I only use it for dates/nights out/bad days so half the week).

Maison Margiela Replica Coffee Break $76 1 oz - Nordstrom - shorturl.at/ekxGL

Backstage @ Yohji Yamamoto F/W 2015

hayakawa aki on a casual day < 3

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