When Youre Writing But You Forget A Word That Was In Your Head Milliseconds Ago So You Just Die For The

Sometimes it's really hard being emotionally intelligent and self-aware, and also being good at analyzing people and yourself, especially when combined with being an overthinker. I know I'm right, even if it doesn't appear true yet, because my brain recognizes the patterns and has this cycle of self doubt that probably leads to self sabotage. I'm so tired of people not being able to be as emotionally intelligent as me, as it just leads to the loss of relationships and me being jaded, when everything could have been avoided with just simple communication

my dream as a fanfic writer is to write a story which people want to talk to me about and send asks about afterwards and discuss things the characters did and the symbolism and meanings behind certain lines and I'll be all "hehe thanks" but irl I'll be in literal tears because I wrote something that means something to someone

New Year's Day is my comfort song the moment I find the live audio I am listening to it nonstop and crying I swear

Not every day has to count. Some days are for repairing, resting, mourning. You don't have to perform every day. Some days are for doing nothing. For sleeping all day or being on your phone. Relaxing is ok, allowed and encouraged. Do what you need to do.

This year's soccer jersey are brand new and I could blend into the ocean wearing it. They aren't terrible but the crotch on the shorts is the worst part of the fit

the problem with reading and writing leading to a strong vocabulary is that you tend to know the vibe of words instead of their meanings.

if I used this word in a sentence, would it make sense? absolutely. if you asked me what it meant, could I tell you? absolutely not.

look at the republican calendar and see which animal/plant/item is associated with your birthday ok. if you're born january 14 you get the day of the cat

also the fact that on ttpd she's a huge mess of a person is great. i don't love everything about that album but i love the messiness of her public persona on it. she's too big to be knowable, yes yes, and she's the tamest of all the pop stars we have, of course. but by her own standards of decorum, she let it rip on this album for once. she said "I get myself off to people i'm not dating sometimes and i hate a chunk of my fans more than sometimes. i have terrible judgement. i kind of am a stalker lowkey. i drink way more than you think (and i should). and was fucking miserable for about half of that tour btw." among other things and then she hit post. good for her.

I'm not sure if anyone has shared this yet, but it's phenomenal, and such a transcendent, emotional journey through her music.

the video is also spectacularly gorgeous, I'm in awe of the impressive talent, dedication, and time that must've gone into creating this and capturing the highs, lows, and connective tissue of these (230!!!) songs. it's like a magic distillation of why so many of us are impacted by and love her art the way we do:

I think Matty Healy is awful but I’m still proud of Taylor putting “but daddy I love him” on the record.

There are songs on the album about her realising he love bombed her and manipulated her. Realising she fell for all of it, she was never going to fix him, and he was never going to be her saviour. She is scathing towards him, but also towards herself for falling for it. She could have left it at that and maybe copped less criticism. Instead she acknowledges the backlash and the defiance she felt in that moment.

It makes me feel the same way her putting Ours on Speak Now does. Grateful that she is open to sharing her stories even when the muse isn’t deserving of the words she wrote, even when releasing it fans the fires of the “I told you so” crowd.

And much like Ours is not a defence of Mayer, BDILH is not an acquittal of Healy. The phrasing she uses is not “he’s a good man they just don’t know him like I do”, it’s “I’m not coming to my senses” “I’d rather burn my whole life down”. The message of the song is not her trying to convince you he’s a good person (he’s not), it’s about a woman stumbling through a crisis and her desperate need to be able to make her own decisions, and that includes her own mistakes - which she seems to be acknowledging Matty was.