"Anti Kink This" "Anti Kink That" My Brother In Christ You Are So Obsessed With What People Are Doing

Do you really think it's fair of you to hate your parents for making you exist?

I think everyone should hate my parents for making me exist.

Now why do migraines have to happen. Why is Satan actively trying to crawl into my skull via my left eye socket and can he please leave.

Some may call it cringe, i call it whimsy✨

thinking about creatures.

If any one of the 141 blokes suggests using that new remote controlled little pink vibrator on you just for fun tonight while you meet up with the others at the pub—don't do it. Do not, under any circumstances, trust them.

It's a fucking trap.

I will elaborate shortly.

the self-indulgent fanfiction will continue until morale improves

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Life is hard

But so are you

Masturbate.

Soap is so the puppy

little snippet of the lads talking (wow!!) in chapter 6 of twbnt for wip wednesday 😏

Just hit my head on the wall (accidentally) and then glared at the wall like it was its fault

I apologised after dw

The way most autism literature describes "literal interpretation" is often not at all similar to how I experience it. Teenage me even thought I couldn't be autistic because I've always been able to learn metaphors easily.

In fact, I love wordplay of all kinds. Teenage me was fascinated to learn all the types of figurative language there are in poetry and literature.

But paperwork and questionnaires are hard, because there's so much they don't state clearly. Or they don't leave room for enough nuance.

"List all the jobs you've had, with start and end dates." What if I don't remember the exact day or month? Is the year enough?

"Have you been suffering from blurred vision?" Well, if I take off my glasses the whole world is blurred, but I'm fairly sure that's not what the intake form at the optometrist is asking.

Or the infamous (and infuriatingly stereotypical) "Would you rather go to a library or a party?" What sort of party? Where? Who's there? I work at a library. Am I currently at the library for work or pleasure? Does it have a good collection?

It's not common figures of speech that confound me. It's ambiguity, in situations that aren't supposed to be ambiguous.