Just 👏 Because 👏 You 👏 Are 👏 Older 👏 Than 👏 Me 👏 Does 👏 Not 👏 Mean 👏 I

i have beven motivated to make a list of the crimes of santa claus. no i will not say why

-promotes toxic masculinity (you better not cry)

-stalking (he sees you when you're sleeping. that's pretty creepy ngl)

-the most common: breaking and entering

-does he pay his elves??? do they have a choice??

-probably doesn't have a license for drivung reindeer

-stealing (takes cookies and carrots. that's very rude)

-forced reindeer to work for like two days nonstop

-favoritism (gives some kids coal and others presents. very rude. it ain't none of your business mr claus)

-doesn't pay rent to live in a whole ass continent. seriously man, you're probably rich, pay your share

-surprising people without permission

-keeping secrets

-not showing his identity (if you know my address & stalk me i deserve to see you)

-forcing people to cheat (i saw my mom kissing santa n. if he stalks people, he def knows she was married)

-on that note, pedophilia (that mom probably wasn't over a hundred years old or sum)

-he also cheated on HIS wife with that mom. why did i like this guy as a kid

-stealing children for help (literally any christmas movie, and you see him kidnapping)

-deception (literally anything he ever does)

-he probably also steals a lot of stuff from us earthlings. where else does he get all that stuff. mans in the north pole

-breaking promises (says he'll get you something for christmas but doesn't)

-probably magics the mailmen. how else do they know where he lives

-forcing those mailmen to go to the north pole coz he was too lazy to come get them. they probably missed dinner too

-reblog with more

black lives matter. they always have.

God having a crush seems like so much effort

why do the mobsters in mafia films always do the crime during the night like it’s called organised crime you would think that they would be a little more organised  about their sleep schedules 

RB IF YOU AGREE

My school's rule about socks for girls basically means that we are never allowed to show our ankles because we are apparently stuck in the Victorian era.

wow i am behind with school work 

slapstick comedy was invented in the 16th century and the world has been going downhill since then and i don’t think that that’s a coincidence 

Bring back punk

I am more scared of male sport stans than k-pop stans