Dick, wailing in dismay: When I asked you to get along, this isn't what I meant--
Jason, in the background recording: 👍👍
Cass and Steph have most definitely joined in. Barbara was going to stay out of it, but then Dick did something to piss her off. Alfred has dealt with this feral family for generations and couldn't care less as long as they maintain decorum. And Bruce is too busy chugging Expresso and hearing colors to pay attention to what is going on.
Okay, but hear me out:
Murder baby Damian, but for whatever reason, his first attempt at Tim's life is put on pause, so they never have that interaction. Instead, before Damian can come up with a new plan, Tim (who's kinda excited he now isn't the baby of the family) offers to train him in detective work for when Damian finally gets the mantle of 'Robin' as a way to bond with him.
"Why train your enemy, Drake?"
"We're brothers, not enemies. Besides, Robin has always been a mantle to pass down. I'm certainly not going to keep it in my twenties or thirties. And other than Bruce, I'm the best detective in the family."
"Very well, Drake, I shall accept your tutelage for the time being."
Damian accepts, of course. Not only can he study Drake for his weaknesses, he will also improve his own skill set. It's worth the wait for Robin. By the time Damian's done, there will be no doubt that he is the superior bat.
Unfortunately, he actually grows fond of Timothy. While he will inevitably get close with Richard, just like in canon, Timothy is a breath of fresh air for when Richard is being too overbearing, especially when it comes to things like 'socializing,' and 'making friends.'
When his father dies, and Timothy declared him actually lost to time, Richard doesn't believe him, can't believe him, because the hope is too painful. Timothy still gives Damian Robin, because, "I'm barely holding on as Batman as it is. I can't handle Robin being gone for potentially months at a time, halfway around the world."
During his partnership with Richard, truly becoming his brother-son, Richard introduces the ideas of pets to him. Damian loves animals, and having and taking care of a creature that could potentially survive on its own, but will have a much better quality of life under his care, speaks to him. He has Alfred and Titus and about half a dozen other stray animals that usually stay for about a week while he nurses them to health at any given moment, but he feels like he should officially have another pet.
Que the whole thing with his grandfather, and Timothy getting kicked out of the top of a skyscraper. He comes home with proof, and the Justice League brings his father home. And as Dick basically refuses to let anyone leave the mansion for the foreseeable future, Damian realizes several facts:
1.) Timothy is a human, and humans are animals.
2.) While Timothy has somehow survived until now, he wouldn't recognize self-care if it slapped him in the face.
3.) Timothy's quality of life will improve if someone is taking care of him because he cannot be trusted to do it for himself. (Is it a coincidence that he loses organs when he is away from the family? Damian thinks not.)
4.) Damian has gotten good at taking care of animals.
Ergo, Timothy is now Damian's pet. Tim doesn't know what to do and simply humors him. Besides, it's nice when someone actually bothers to give him a plate of foods that he likes when he gets hyper focused on work and forgets to eat. That, and while he is exasperated every time Damian tranqs him, those are still the best sleeps of his life.
Jason finds it hilarious. Damian doesn't understand Richard or his father's reactions.
"Damian, Tim can take care of himself."
"Barely. Father, now that I am in charge of his sleep schedule, there aren't as many dark circles under his eyes. Even Alfred has commented that Timothy consumes less caffeine."
"Damian, he can't be your pet."
"Why not?"
"Tim's your brother; he's family."
"So are you saying that Alfred and Titus aren't family?"
Completely obsessed with this edit. It's what made me get off my butt and actually search for the translated web novel instead of just waiting for the manhwa to update.
"When the Third Wheel Strikes Back" PV :D
(Spoiler references to Chapters 300-640+)
You can also watch it here! youtu.be/QXKeqf1PUMo
my biggest pet peeve with m/f ships
‘that ship doesn’t even make sense they never even interacted in canon!’ have you considered that i ship characters based on their dynamics and the potential they could have had if they did interact
some warmth for atsushi because he has suffered enough
This. This gives me life.
They aren’t allowed to drink together anymore
Sobbing, this is the cutest thing ever ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Days at the cafe
As much as I love Jily and Jegulus, I do not want Jegulily to just be about Lily and Regulus learning to be friends for the sake of their mutual boyfriend's happiness. It should be less about, "Aw, Reggie's kind of cute. I can see why James likes him," and more, "HOLY FUCK HOW DID I MANAGE TO BAG TWO PEOPLE?! AND THEY'RE BOTH HOT, SO YOU CAN SUCK IT, PETUNIA!"
Jily: the classic. We already know how they get together.
Regulily: It's his OWLs year and he ends up enlisting the help of Lily for studying because she's so smart. Basically nerds being cute together.
Jegulus: since James has obviously noticed Lily and Regulus hanging out together, he also gets to witness Regulus be a cute nerd (who, like Lily, could absolutely hand him his arse in a fight). Obviously James falls in love as well.
Just something that I think about at night, whenever I'm unsuccessful at finding jegulily edits on youtube.
AU where Dumbledore is all like: I should have known Tom was evil. His mother date raped his father and that was how he was born. He doesn't understand love and never will.
NOPE! He's just an autistic child who grew up in an abusive environment during the Depression and World War II and developed an antisocial personality disorder as a result!
Dumbledore: You shouldn't steal. Stealing is bad.
Little Tom: But why?
Dumbledore: Stealing is wrong.
Little Tom, frustrated: But why???
Orion, trying to explain how a spell works: You just have to feel it.
Tom, deadpan: I beg your finest pardon?
Dumbledore: How well can you empathize, Tom?
Tom, who mentally cannot put himself "in other people's shoes": That's a made up word.
Dumbledore: Tom seems too good at masking his true nature around others. I am the only one who sees him for what he is.
Tom, almost vibrating with overstimulation: If someone gets into my personal space without permission again, I will stab them in the eye.
Voldemort: Step aside, silly girl.
Lily Potter: Please, not Harry!
Voldemort, who had a plan:...
Voldemort, internally: Crap. Now what am I supposed to do?
Triton: I have only had my infant demigod half brother Percy for a day-
Tyson: but if anyone hurts him you'd kill them?
Triton: -and he's already uspered my position as dad's favorite, endeared himself to all of sealife on the east coast to the point where they go to him for help instead of me, and-
Amphitrite, swimming by: Aww, are we talking about my second youngest child? He's such a good little fish-
Triton: -STOLE MY MOTHER!
Tyson:
Tyson: But if someone did try to hurt him-
Triton: *sighs*
Triton: Yes Tyson, if someone tried to hurt Percy I would eviscerate them to the point where regeneration is impossible.
Please don't be mean. I cry when people are mean and I don't want to cry.
97 posts