The CARNAL DESIRE In This Picture I Have No Words-

every day should be Jayden Revri appreciation day, if you ask me. cue my favourite Charles gifs:

final gif by @mellxncollie

Jayden captured the duality of Charles perfectly: The boy he thinks he needs to be, and the boy he hides deep within himself. The boy who tries "to be extra happy for all of us" and the boy who "couldn't stop my dad from beating the shit out of me, no matter how good I was." The boy who fearlessly protects others, and the boy who couldn't protect himself. And it's all there in his eyes, all the pain and care and love. Jayden understands who Charles is and you can see it in every. single. frame.

Jayden is also the David Tennant of this show for how much the joy of playing Charles radiates from him, and the Michael Sheen of this show for how much he ships payneland. I love how much he loves the show and that he engages with the fandom, reminding us to not lose hope. He is the no.1 fan of the show and we love to see it!

And finally, I need to give a shout out to Jayden's incredible Charles playlist, because so many songs from that playlist have become so dear to me (Francesca, Family Line, Orpheus, Summer Child, The Mates of Soul) and I will forever cherish them not just for the beautiful songs they are but also for the connection to Charles and dead boy detectives. I already know that my wrapped this year will be dominated by them (and Swan Upon Leda, for Edwin) and I wouldn't want it any other way. Having a whole playlist to engage with and to deep dive into Charles' character was incredibly cool and I am so grateful to Jayden for sharing it with us.

Jayden Revri, you are a gem, and we are so so so lucky that you are our Charles forever.

I kicked my legs, giggled, squealed and rolled around on my bed. This is too much cuteness I have stopped working.

They’re in Lorb (Orb Love)

“Crystal?” Niko’s voice over the phone is a shaky whisper.

Crystal immediately juggles her keys and groceries to grab her phone properly. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Niko says quietly. “But something weird is happening.”

Crystal shoves her front door open with her shoulder as the FaceTime request dings. She drops the groceries in the foyer and accepts it. Instead of Niko’s lovely face filling the screen, it’s a shaky shot of the doorway to the office. “What am I looking at?”

“I don’t know,” Niko whispers. “That’s why I called you.” She steps forward and the phone camera almost immediately gives up in the face of very bright light. “Aw, you can’t see it.” The camera flips back to reveal Niko’s face bathed in the radiance. Crystal notes with some relief that Niko looks more awed than hurt.

“Babe,” Crystal says patiently. “What’s going on?”

“There’s like a glowing orb. It’s all pretty colors. Like pink and blue. It’s sitting on Edwin’s desk and he’s not here. Neither of them are—“

“Yeah, no, they are,” Crystal sighs. “They’re Venn diagramming.”

Niko tilts her head in frame, puppyish confusion that makes Crystal just want to scoop her up and kiss her face all over. “What?”

“You know what a Venn diagram is.” Niko nods at her. Neither of them probably got enough school but they did go. “So the Venn diagram of ghosts who love each other is a circle,” Crystal explains, smirking a little. Edwin had been so mad the first time she said it, which only made it funnier.

"Ohhhhh," Niko says, eyes widening with understanding. "That's clever."

Crystal thinks she probably looks as smug as she feels. “They have a ghost form that doesn’t require them to exert as much energy. They’re just spirit orbs. Usually you only see spirit orbs floating faintly in the background, even if you have the Sight. They’re a low-energy form. Apparently, at some point, the boys figured out that if their orbs touch, they can meld together.”

“That sounds dirty,” Niko laughs.

“It probably is! Anyway, Charles and Edwin glow so fuckin’ brightly when they’re together. Sometimes it’s just a partial meld and sometimes they become one giant glowing orb. I usually like to check in with them, but don’t touch them. They can sense some things while in that form so I don’t want to bother them. I just don't like leaving them alone since it’s also a vulnerable time and I prefer to make sure no other ghosts intrude on them either. You know people show up at the office at all hours.”

“Soooooo…want to come over?” Niko asks, raising a perfect eyebrow. “Girls’ Night at the Ghost Orb?

“Sure,” Crystal laughs. “It’s a date. I’ll be right over. You want anything?”

“Bring some of the soda and the matcha we picked up last weekend. I was gonna stash some at the office anyway for when we have late nights.”

“Alright. Love you, babe. Don’t touch the orb and I’ll see you soon.” Crystal blows a little kiss to the camera and watches Niko’s face crease with delight. Niko blows her a kiss too and then signs off.

***

Crystal can see the bright light even through the door and contemplates whether a door shade might be helpful. She walks into the office humming.

For the second time today, she drops her grocery bag on the floor. She rips her headphones out and puts her hands on her hips. “What did I say about touching the orb, Niko?”

Niko looks up from where she is…well, spooning the ghost orb on the couch. She is so damn good at the puppy eyes that Crystal almost forgets that she asked a question. Almost.

“Babe, seriously!?”

“They almost fell off the desk!” Niko protests, pouting. “I had to catch them. And they glow more when I touch them.” She traces a gentle fingertip over the top curve of the orb nestled against her and it erupts in pink swirls over a dark blue background.

Crystal sighs. “Alright.” In fairness, the boys never specifically prohibited touching, it just seemed polite. And probably, they won’t mind because it’s Niko and both of them find her utterly charming; Crystal can’t even be offended by that because she also thinks her girlfriend is adorable. She rummages in the grocery bag for a soda and uses her keys to pry the lid off the bottle. She takes a sip and then motions at Niko. “Lift your head up.”

Niko moves obligingly, giving Crystal enough space to sit at the end of the couch before she drops her head into Crystal’s lap.

“See,” Niko says sweetly. “Now we’re all comfy.” She grabs the edge of her tunic top and uses it to scoop the orb up closer to her stomach. Helpfully, this also mutes the bright light, at least from Crystal’s point of view. She pulls her sunglasses out of her hair carefully and offers them to Niko, who grins up at her before sliding them on.

“You’re explaining this to Edwin when he stops being an orb.”

“Okay.” Niko nuzzles her cheek against Crystal’s thigh. “I have so many questions anyway. I want to know all about being a giant ball of light. Honestly, that sounds pretty cool. Do you think Edwin would let me take him around while he was an orb? What if his orb wants to go hang out at the beach or something? For like maximum ghost relaxation.”

Crystal can’t help the way she looks at Niko, her heart almost bursting with love. “Yeah, baby, I bet for you he’d go on some kind of ghost orb vacation. Charles would be thrilled if you got him to take a break occasionally.” She tucks Niko’s heavy silken hair behind her ear. “Want a sip?”

“Is it the tamarind one?”

“No, regular cola. There’s a tamarind one in the bag if you want.”

“No. I’m comfy. Gimme a sip.”

Crystal holds the bottle to her mouth carefully, tipping it up in little bursts until Niko gets her fill. She bends down to kiss her, both of their mouths sticky-sweet and slick.

They spend hours there, sharing a drink and taking turns playing music on Crystal’s phone. It’s fun, both spending time with Niko and watching the orb change colors. Crystal knows that the deep blue is Charles and the pink is Edwin, the two of them mixed together in this form. She knows because she once caught Charles with Edwin’s orb tucked under his elbows while he sorted some small silver charms on the floor. He’d been talking to it before she walked in and when he looked up his face was nearly as pink as the orb cuddled in his lap.

There’s a slight buzzing noise and then Charles falls out of Niko’s grasp rather spectacularly. He grins up at them from the floor though, entirely unhurt. “Heya.”

“Charles?” Niko says, leaning up on her elbow. “Are you okay?”

“Aces, Niko, don’t worry. Gimme Edwin?”

Niko sits up to hand the orb to Charles and Crystal doesn’t think that she imagines the way it glows brighter in Charles’s careful hands. Charles stands and sets the orb on the desk.

“You guys okay?” Crystal asks. “No supernatural exhaustion from working cases while we sleep or something, right?”

Silently and neatly, Edwin replaces the orb and says, “We’re perfectly fine.” He shoots his cuffs and then rests his hands in his lap; he looks tidy perched on the desk, like a little doll, while Charles is leaning against it like he’d like to dive right back into Edwin again.

“Does it feel like sleeping?” Niko asks, taking Crystal's sunglasses off and hanging them from the collar of her shirt. “It looked relaxing.”

“It is.” Edwin softens a little, looking at where Niko is resting her head against Crystal’s shoulder. Crystal stretches her legs out, thinking maybe she’d like a nap too, all warm and cozy with her girlfriend. “However,” Edwin continues, ever the proper tutor, “it does not resemble sleep. It is, at best, a facsimile of lying on a grassy hillock and watching the clouds drift by. That is to say, restful, but still aware.”

“What does Charles feel like?” Niko asks and Crystal snorts.

“Warm,” Edwin answers instinctively and then makes an odd little motion. It looks like the cousin of a flinch, a nervous tic he hasn’t quite killed. He clears his throat. “Notably, though most ghostly existences do not include registering sensations from food or touching others, we can be interacted with by other supernatural beings. We mostly encounter hostile creatures or other ghosts. Though I have found most ghosts are as cold as they are long dead, Charles is strangely warm to the touch.”

Charles grins like he did that on purpose, the idiot.

Niko sighs. “Awwwwww, that’s so sweet. Is Edwin warm?” She looks at Charles expectantly.

“I think he’s pretty hot,” Charles says with a wink and Crystal throws the nearest pillow at him. He catches it, the asshole, and lobs it back.

“Hey,” Crystal says, batting it away from Niko’s face. “Leave her out of it.”

“Indeed,” Edwin says dryly, “it’s bad form to drag civilians into your fight. Come on, Niko, I had something to show you.”

Crystal hugs Niko tighter to her, grinning when Niko giggles. “You can’t steal my girlfriend. She already spent all afternoon spooning you two.”

Charles laughs at that.

“Sorry, should I define spooning for you?” Crystal teases Edwin.

He rolls his eyes and then offers Charles his hand. “I can figure it out very well. How exactly do you think people kept warm during the winter in my time?” He spins Charles into his arms, the slight height advantage he gained from sitting on the desk allowing him to wrap himself entirely around Charles like a smug octopus.

Charles beams at them, thoroughly pleased to be tangled up in Edwin. Crystal can’t help smiling too. It took so long for them to admit their feelings, and then even longer to show even a hint of those feelings in front of her. This level of cuddling is only a few months old and it’s utterly adorable. She presses her cheek to Niko’s hair and inhales her sweet perfume.

“Why don’t you just bring the book here?” Niko asks Edwin. “Then we could all be warm and cozy.”

Edwin makes a considering face. “I could. Where will I keep Charles? You two are taking up two thirds of the couch.”

“Oh that’s easy,” Niko says, looping an arm around Crystal’s neck to pull herself into Crystal’s lap properly. Crystal wraps an arm around her waist instinctively, holding her steady as she wriggles herself into her best position.

“Very well,” Edwin says indulgently, as though this is a great favor and he won’t delight in cuddling Charles. “Shall I read out loud to you?”

“Yes,” Charles hums just as Niko echoes him.

Edwin’s mouth twitches into a smile. “Very well. Move over then.”

Edwin picks up the book from his desk, a small one with a green fabric cover and gold-edged pages; he settles on the other half of the sofa and waits expectantly for Charles to sit on his lap.

With their legs tangled together, he hands the book to Charles so he can wrap his arms around Charles and hook his chin over Charles’ bony shoulder. Niko tucks her feet under Edwin’s ghostly thigh and he smiles at her.

Crystal closes her eyes as Edwin begins to read; she won’t admit it, but his voice and Niko’s warm weight in her lap are more than enough to send her off to sleep in a heartbeat.

Edwin and Niko are same text different font if you think about it

Same spectrum different sides fits too

For now, I will be content with fics and other dbda media that isn't in film form. But that doesn't lessen my craving for some proper dbda episodes. I do not care whether dbda season 2 is on a different platform, but it matters to me so deeply that it is played by the same actors and is a continuation of season 1. I cannot explain how much I desire more proper episodes to fuel this hyperfixation.

May the community always stay strong :) because we have to get dbda back

Dbda is for the autistic and/or lgbtqia+ community who over analyze every bit of paineland and kick their feet and giggle whenever there's the slightest bit of romance on screen. I love this community sm

THIS IS IT

I want to talk about THIS moment. Right before. There's a TON of people misreading Caitlyn's intent because she's using such a playful demeanor after Vi's sorrowful self-deprecation. To be honest, it's the best response she could have had, and the best tactic. Her demeanor serves as a stark contrast to the spiral of self hatred that Vi is going down, and it's an excellent distraction. Caitlyn is stopping her line of thinking, right then and there, and she does it while delivering one of the most romantic and understated declarations of love I've ever seen.

Stay with me here.

Let's be very clear: Caitlyn did NOT come to the cell with the goal of seducing Vi. Not even. How do we know? Aside from several context clues that come before this scene, the way Caitlyn responds to the kiss is very telling:

See how long it takes Cait to even register what the fuck is going on?? She's literally like "oh. OH. we're kissing? WE'RE KISSING." And Vi also OPENS HER EYES very briefly, to check that Caitlyn is as into this as she is, right as Cait settles into the kiss, likely sensing her hesitation/delayed reaction. This scene is NOT Caitlyn seducing Vi. This scene is Caitlyn giving herself to Vi, and Vi choosing exactly what she wants to do with her, which is VERY different.

What does Caitlyn say right before the kiss? She says, "Do you really think I needed all the guards at the hexgates?" Translation: I left Jinx's cell unguarded on purpose. I want you to know that I heard you during our last conversation. I want you to know that I trust you. I want you to know that my love and care for you is more important than my need to sate my grief and desire for revenge. I choose you.

And following: "Sorry to say, you've grown a bit predictable." Translation: I know you. I see you. I knew you would choose this, coming after your sister, and I facilitated the circumstances in which you COULD choose this. You don't choose wrong. You choose love, and I understand that now. I want you to know that I support your choices, and they won't cost you the people you care about, at least not me, not anymore. I know that you'll always choose your sister, and I've made peace with that. What you want is what I want.

That is MONUMENTAL. That's quite possibly one of the most romantic things I've ever seen in media. Because who the hell has the guts to give up their grief and forgive their mother's murderer, all for love? That's a level of sacrifice that not enough people are acknowledging.

People say Caitlyn never changed, never felt remorse, never grew from the bad choices she made. I say wrong. And this was the turning point.

Monty is undeniably one of the most morally grey characters in the show, but I think under that he's just a silly little guy

LIKE LOOK AT THAT AND TELL ME HE'S NOT JUST VERY SILLY

A little rant for paineland week!

I don't want to put Charles' and Edwin's in the category of QPR yet because I'm not 100% on what it means but if this explanation sounds exactly like QPR than please tell me :)

Ok so I feel like once they so get together; that much is inevitable, the emotional dynamic between them would stay the same. The only thing that would change emotionally in between them is a sense of better understanding- thus leading to a slightly stronger bond. Physically, however, things would change. Due to their better understanding, they feel more comfortable to be intamite around each other. In those moments of physical affection really all they think is devotion- how they would go to the ends of the world for each other. In summary they have some physical romantic aspects in a relationship that could only otherwise be described as devotion.

Or, to put it more simply: they kiss and act like it's a normal platonic thing kinda

Thanks for putting up with my repetitive and confusing rant 😭

Giant date caramel cinnamon roll (x)