On The Podcast Today, You Mentioned Getting Lab-grown Gems Somewhere. I Thought You Said “Gems Gems

Trisha Elric told her son that he was the man of the house and that he needed to look out for his younger brother and this boy really took her words and internalized them so hard that he sacrificed a couple of limbs, made himself the government's bitch and threw away what was left of his already shattered childhood about it

i hauve a cold

“So let me get this straight. We’re here to rescue a princess.”

“That’s right.”

“At the request of a princess.”

“Right again.”

“And you, who will be leading the expedition, are also a princess.”

“You’re very perceptive.”

“How big is your royal family, again?“

“We don’t have one.”

“But–“

“We overthrew our monarchy centuries ago, but we kept most of the titles around. The rank of ‘princess’ is held by the directors in charge of various civil service branches.“

“Huh. And the princess we’re rescuing today is in charge of…?”

“Public sanitation.”

“The Lord of Death’s Dominion kidnapped your public sanitation director?”

“We think he’s a little confused.”

why is france called the hexagon when its abundantly clear that it’s a pentagon

I bet I could use this to wish away that pesky genie

I put a cursed ring into the urban fantasy vending machine in an attempt to get rid of it

the vending machine dispenses a dessicated monkey's paw

NO, YOU AREN'T "EEPY"

A MAN CANNOT BE "EEPY."

HE CAN BE FATIGUED.

HE CAN BE SLUMBEROUS.

HE CAN BE BATTLEWORN FROM THE DAY'S ORDEALS.

BUT NEVER, AND I MEAN NEVER, MUST YOU EVER UTTER THAT WORD.

AND THE BED AND PILLOW WHICH YOU REST YOUR BODY ON?

MUST NEVER BE SO LARGE AS TO MAKE YOUR OWN FORM SEEM DIMINUTIVE IN COMPARISON. IT MUST BE ONLY LARGE ENOUGH TO FIT YOUR OWN BODY, LIKE A COFFIN.

AND YOU ARE ALLOWED BUT 1 PLUSH UPON IT.

AND IT HAS TO BE OF YOUR GREATEST ENEMY.

i’m kinda obsessed with ben stillers bluesky

ANDOR | 2.01 - 2.03 + TEXT POSTS