I mean don’t get me wrong I loved the game but that ending-?????
So yeah enjoy this crappily drawn infinite wall of text I DID WHAT I COULD WITH WHAT I HAD TO WORK WITH
(also please open in new tabs if you want to read anything goddang tumblr makes things tiny)
(p.s. I did another dumb thing as a sequel)
empathy gets treated as this universally positive thing but we forget that empathy often equals pain, and pain often activates fight or flight behaviors. a lot of my most asshole moments as a person were motivated by a twinge of empathy that was too painful to engage with in that moment, so i became aggressive and mean, NOT compassionate and helpful
The idea of Hosonaga and Sholmes working together on the SS Burya has so much potential. Sholmes makes a deduction and without questioning Hosonaga goes along with it, and like halfway through investigating they realize that it’s not fucking right what have they been doing for the last half hour.
Or Hosonaga has to keep correcting Sholmes. Constantly.
Sholmes is just so consistent that Hosonaga can be swapped with literally any other character and he’ll react in the same way. Still love him for it though.
Prompt below:
Blinded.
I thought about van Zieks' breakdown and how he didn't have any noticable post-breakdown sprites, so then I had the idea for an alternative breakdown where he rips off his badge and afterwards, regards it with horror and confusion because he decided to carry his brother's legacy without knowing there was blood was sticking to it.
This has been simmering for a bit, so here is what’s been cooked up so far.
So basically, the entire BLU team are clones of the RED team. The RED team was doing so well against the original BLU team that they decided to clone the RED team. What better enemy than yourself, right? Well, Blutarch was rather upset with this. In my eyes, Blutarch is smarter than Redmond, but not smart enough to avoid this entire gravel war. He decided that the clones needed to be better than the RED team. Each BLU mercenary will be practically the same person as their RED counterpart, but there are key differences, some of which being their names. Here is the list of changes:
Scout:
- Not much was changed about him, but BLU Scout was made to be less talkative. It was assumed that Scout’s ability to constantly ramble on would be an annoyance, but they were wrong. Scout’s constant blabbering on the RED team was a key factor in their cooperation.
Soldier:
- They removed his patriotism for America, since they thought his obsession with it was stupid. But since BLU Soldier isn’t patriotic, he doesn’t really have a reason to fight. RED Soldier was fighting for his country against the commies, but BLU Soldier is just a guy with a rocket launcher.
Pyro:
- I headcanon that Pyro is just a flameproof suit brought to life with magic (more on that in a later post). It’s pretty hard to replicate magic though, so BLU Pyro is just a robot. His design was key in Grey Mann’s takeover, as it was the first robot mercenary.
Demo:
- Made him sober. Problem is, what made RED Demo so unpredictable was his drunkedness. BLU Demoman is stronger than RED Demo, with more precise attacks that do more damage. However, he is much more predictable, and therefore easier to dodge.
Heavy:
- Pretty much unchanged. He can speak English better though, but that doesn’t do anything since there is no trust on the BLU team.
Engineer:
- More cooperative and less insane. Straight up improvement, except he’ll listen to anyone and everyone on the BLU team, even if they tell him to do something stupid since he’s desperate for appreciation.
Medic:
- Not as insane. But RED Medic’s insanity is what led to so many breakthroughs on the team. RED was definitely first to discover the power of most Mediguns, since BLU Medic is a tad more squeamish about shoving a heart into a ribcage with no anesthesia.
Sniper:
- Them: “Make him stop pissing in jars it’s disgusting”
Sniper with no Jarate and now down one of his most powerful weapons: “ok”
Seriously though, BLU Sniper just doesn’t scare off the RED Spy as much as the RED Sniper. Piss is the only thing preventing that knife from lodging in his back.
Spy:
- A Spy’s job is to trust no one, and BLU Spy follows that to the end. He will not hesitate to stab all of his teammates in the back. He’ll never come out of his shell like the RED Spy did. But just like Engineer, he seeks appreciation for his job.
The amount of work and money it took to clone the original team was too much, and they were stuck with these clones. In the end, the BLU team hated each other while the RED team depended on each other. Cooperation is key in an endless war over gravel, and if the BLU team doesn’t master that soon, they’ll soon be having a problem on their hands.
(The BLU team mercs would have the same backstory as the RED team mercs, their only difference being their names.)
i guess you could say that the real victory was the friends we made along the way-
[ If anyone ever uses these headcanons for anything, I would like credit. I just want to establish some sort of presence on the internet, I guess. I’ve come up with ideas in my head that someone else online writes up a day before I even write it down. ]
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ikJA4T0N3bjLicy7NueXiiGJQyfCOYLAcIEedI0TnhQ/edit
I posted the link to this document earlier, however I’ve since added more to it! I’m very proud of those, and I’d appreciate if you gave it a read!
For people who don’t know, this document contains all translations in the website Markiplier posted in the description of PARADOX DETECTED, and now includes translations from ERROR and a section for theories.
TL;DR: Document now has very good extra bits to it that are worth reading!
ooh! there’s something in the directory known as Wal-World, and when I searched it up, it led to a website that “gave us access to the legal world”. and based on my limited knowledge of the legal system, cases are what’s argued in courts. the case directory may be referring to cases that were argued in some sort of universal court.
So if you go to the source code of the 404 page on the USA website, you can see it’s the background without the animated circles. I opened it in a new tab and I thought I saw Themis, the Greek personification of Justice. It seems I wasn’t wrong. It’s pretty common for Themis sculptures to be in places like courts etc, USA didn’t use it without reason. I wonder why they used one of the Earth’s symbols for all of the different aliens and species from all across the multiverse to see (its probably nothing lol, just a design choice to establish USA as a institution of justice or something) @canceltheact the Ancient Greek theme continues…
plastic man
Probably like, eraser flavored
actually a way better answer than mine. maybe i should poke holes in him with a pencil like an eraser. like eraser putty yk?? nosh down on sum plastic man. yum.
do me a solid and just reblog this saying what time it is where you are and what you’re thinking about in the tags.
*laughing.jpg* otherwise known as wishfulapotheosisa blog for me to keep to myself and occasionally deal AOE damage to people around me. i rarely reblog things.also on twitter. have fun finding me.
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