Psych (2006) Really Is Just "Hi, We're Detectives With The Police Department, And Here's This Weird Guy

carlton lassiter definitely has a sign at his house that says “trespassers will be shot. survivors will be shot again.”

it is also specifically addressed to a certain psychic detective who keeps showing up uninvited, bearing gifts of pineapples, despite the increasingly growing number of signs which don’t seem to do anything.

Flight Attendant: Please make sure all small items are secure!

Hardison: *grabs Eliot next to him and holds him tightly against his chest*

Hardison: Do you feel secure?

Eliot: I will hit you.

They really put the ha into hanging on by a thread

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here are my favorite real things that happen on person of interest

the ai is lesbian coded

the main guy reese is widely known as "the kneecap guy" because he shoots people's kneecaps out

the other main guy finch lives in a library. reese at one point gives him a dog. the dog eats books. reese is aware of this when he gifts the dog

they kidnap a baby and then have to raise it for an episode

reese gets two cops who are partners to do things for him but refuses to tell each one about the other person, so joss (played by taraji p henson) and fusco (this is actually his name) spend an entire season going "john I think they're onto me. I think they suspect i'm working for you." and he just goes "don't worry about it". he does this entirely to fuck with them

the show's evil hot lesbian villain root threatens to torture the show's bisexual sociopath shaw with an iron. it is their meetcute

at one point the dog in question is being used to threaten reese’s life. so they adopt it. fusco has a ball gag on during this scene

the dog eats a first edition isaac asimov

the cia and the fbi have a turf war

the cia and fbi both completely fail to capture this one dude, whose name and face they know, for two years

some fucking guy spends an entire season trying to take down the mafia while fucking with the duo and then when he goes to jail one of them just straight up plays chess with him weekly

the aforementioned evil hot lesbian root tries to kidnap and almost kills finch in the first episode they meet. she becomes a main character

shaw and root steal reese's grenade launcher

reese's backstory is that he straight up killed a man for domestically abusing his ex

one of them gets drugged on ecstacy and dances to a microwave about to explode

they live in a subway basement for a year

the creator of the lesbian coded ai has entirely bird aliases

I want to implant Shawn and Gus into every media I watch they just have that immense power to seamlessly fit in and inevitably elevate whatever is going on. it literally wouldn't matter it could be a post-apocalyptic wasteland and Shawn would still show up at the survivor camp wearing shades drinking from a pineapple like "wow this place is sadder than Gus's dating life in high school" and Gus would be all "the water here isn't even being boiled properly Shawn. I'm not staying at this camp I will not be getting dysentery I'm already fighting my sciatica flare-up" and all the people at the camp would be like "what the actual fuck" as Shawn and Gus walk off bickering into the distance and disappear

There’s a fun game that team red like to play called suit roulette were they each traded suits for a week and have to fight the others villains.

Spider-Man’s villains are all highly concerned and keep asking if he’s ok cause Matt just isn’t talking at all and they are used to banter

Peter has managed to make friends with a bunch of Deadpool’s villains after chatting with them and promising not to kill them if they stopped being ‘bad guys’ because it’s ‘just not cool anymore’

And Daredevils villains are just all ducking confused at why the hell he’s not even fighting back (Wade is literally just standing there letting them stab and shoot him whilst chatting about his life- he’s using them as free therapy)

polyamory was invented in 1969 by kirk, spock, and mccoy, and their only true successors are the leverage ot3 and whatever the fuck psych had going on

You seat a table of three for breakfast and the woman says hmm yes I will have a loaded waffle tower please and you say ma'am that's a children's item and she says so and you say okay fine and the man who brought a whole laptop in says ah, I will have what the lady is having and an orange soda and you say for breakfast and he says of course and then the guy who is clearly a criminal says what kind of bread do you use for your French toast and you say ... White and he says can I sub brioche and you say we don't have brioche and he sighs and says I'll get the rooty tooty... Whatever the cowboy omelette and the other two start razzing him about being a cowboy and when you come to check up on them the woman is playing airplane with the loaded waffle tower trying to get the criminal to eat it and they tip $200 and your watch has been replaced with a better watch

Incorrect Leverage quotes [7/?]