For The First Time In My Life I Was Happy - Blog Posts

McCoy: Well, that's the second time man's been thrown out of paradise.

Kirk: No, no, Bones. This time we walked out on our own. Maybe we weren't meant for paradise. Maybe we were meant to fight our way through. Struggle, claw our way up, scratch for every inch of the way. Maybe we can't stroll to the music of the lute. We must march to the sound of drums.

Spock: Poetry, Captain. Non-regulation.

Kirk: We haven't heard much from you about Omicron Ceti Three, Mister Spock.

Spock: I have little to say about it, Captain, except that for the first time in my life I was happy.

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This might legitimately thee most beautiful ending of any episode of Star Trek ever made. The dialogue, as per usual from Dorothy Fontana, is exquisitely written, and it's performed perfectly by all three.

But I find it especially interesting that Ralph Seninsky chose to cut to Spock while Kirk is talking about how "we must march to the sound of drums", because while it's a philosophy that Kirk wholeheartedly agrees with, this episode seems to show that it's one that Spock has taken onto himself - his self-made purgatory. To Kirk, marching to the sound of drums is the only way to find true happiness. To Spock, marching to the sound of drums is the life that he has chosen, and for it he must sacrifice happiness.

But I also find it additionally interesting, as Spock plays a Vulcan harp/lyre/lute. It's almost as if Kirk's poetical philosophizing is speaking directly to various parts of who Spock is as a person. Perhaps he cannot stroll to the music of the lute, but that does not mean he cannot embrace that music all while marching to the beat of the drum.

Like I said earlier, I feel like Spock genuinely did grow after this episode because he does seem to embrace an appreciation for beauty after this more than he had before, and this is the final moment showing that. In his own way, Kirk is telling Spock that he does not have to give up the former in order to achieve the latter. And in his own way, in response, Spock gently denies that.

And it's heartbreaking, and beautiful, and amazing in every way