This Is So Me - Blog Posts

"Blorbo from my shows" this, "blorbo from my videogames" that. What about "blorbo from my DnD game" that only three other people know. Do you ever think about that-

i don't smoke for the obvious reasons of not wanting to develop an addiction to nicotine but god do i so often feel the emotion 'i need a cigarette'.

proud to say that I have never once in my life figured out the whodunit in any crime story I've read or watched. I just let the facts and clues wash over me, absorbing absolutely none of it. I am the audience they think of when they throw in red herrings, in case you've ever wondered "who would fall for this obvious false lead". it's me. I am the idiot viewer/reader. not once has an obviously framed clue revealed anything to me. my head is completely empty when I consume these stories.

There are two wolves within you. One of them just came up with a fanfic you desperately need to see, and the other refuses to write it.

we're goin' to freak town, my homeland ☆

Fruit Roll Up

Character: Yoichi Isagi, Meguru Bachira, Hyoma Chigiri, Rin Itoshi, Seishiro Nagi, Reo Mikage, Sae Itoshi, Michael Kaiser, Ryusei Shidou

Content: Blue Lock boys react to you wanting to wrap a fruit roll up around it (semi crack fic, semi smut)

A/N: inspired by this post -@captainshindo

Warnings: mentions of oral sex

         Yoichi Isagi

      "Wait, hold on—what?"

      Isagi blinked at you like you had just suggested kicking a soccer ball all the way to the moon. His brows furrowed; lips slightly parted in sheer bewilderment as he tried to process your words.

      "You wanna put a fruit roll up on… where?"

      His voice wavered between confusion and mild concern as he sat there, watching you dangle a blue colorful fruit roll up between your fingers like it was some kind of forbidden delicacy. You grinned, leaning in a little closer, eyes sparkling with mischief.

      "Come on, Ichi, just trust me on this."

      "I mean, sure, I guess. But why?" He shifted awkwardly, fingers twitching against his knee as a flush crept up his neck. His usual composure, the razor-sharp focus he had on the field, seemed to crumble under the sheer absurdity of the situation.

      “Because I wanna try it out,” you said, pouting just enough to make it almost impossible for him to say no.

      His shoulders sagged in surrender, a deep sigh escaping his lips. "If it makes you happy, then—ah! Ohhh, fuck—”

      You didn’t even let him finish his sentence before jumping at the opportunity. A victorious grin spread across your face as you reached forward, determination shining in your eyes.

      “See? Not such a bad idea, huh?” you mused as you got to work.

      Isagi sucked in a sharp breath, throwing his head back with an unexpected hum. His fingers twitched against his sides as if resisting the urge to swat your hands away, but he didn’t. His eyes fluttered shut for a second before peeking at you, filled with a mix of trepidation and intrigue.

      "You're really enjoying this, aren't you?" His voice came out breathless, slightly strained.

      You tilted your head, biting your lip to keep from laughing. "Maybe a little."

      "As long as you’re happy," he muttered, exhaling through his nose. His ears were burning red, and he refused to meet your gaze, probably regretting every decision that led him to this moment. And yet, he didn’t stop you.

      There was something about seeing Isagi, usually so confident and competitive, now reduced to a flustered mess over something so ridiculously simple. The contrast was almost too much to handle.

      "Okay, okay," you giggled, finally pulling back slightly. "What do you think? Rate the experience."

      Isagi blinked at you, lips parted like he was still buffering. Then, after a long pause, he swallowed thickly.

      "Honestly?" He rubbed the back of his neck, eyes darting anywhere but at you. "Kinda… weird. But not bad. Like, I didn't think it would work, but now—uh." His sentence trailed off as he looked at you again, expression unreadable.

      You smirked, tilting your head. "Go on."

      "You might be onto something," he admitted begrudgingly, shifting slightly under your gaze. "But if you tell anyone about this, I swear—"

      You snorted, reaching over to poke his cheek. "Relax, Ichi. I don’t tell anyone about anything we do in the bedroom"

      "Alright, good. So, uh..." He trailed off, eyes locked onto you with anticipation. You raised an eyebrow, tilting your head, waiting for him to continue.

      His cheeks flushed as he hesitated before mumbling, "Are you gonna finish?"

      A smirk played on your lips. "You want me to?"

      "...Yes, please," he admitted, almost shyly.

      And that was all the confirmation you needed before putting him back in your mouth and getting to work.

     Meguru Bachira

      "Oh-ho-ho~? You absolute freak, I love it!" Bachira clapped his hands together, eyes gleaming with mischief like a goblin who had just discovered a new way to cause mayhem. He leaned in closer, watching you with rapt attention.

      You pulled out the fruit roll up, mango pineapple flavored and got to work wrapping it around Bachira’s dick.

      "Wait, wait, wait—you’re actually doing this? Oh, this is gonna be amazing." His excitement was borderline unhinged, his energy bouncing all over the place as he perched on the edge of his seat, barely able to contain himself.

      You didn’t expect him to be this excited. You were actually unsure of how he’d react to your request but this was better than you expected. Maybe that wasn’t such a good thing though because before you even got to put your mouth on it, he was swirling out ideas.

      "What’s next, huh? Should we go full dessert mode? Whipped cream? Chocolate drizzle? No? Tch, you’re no fun," he teased, shaking his head dramatically before perking right back up. "Fine, fine! Just fruit rolls ups… for now"

      As you rolled your eyes and continued, Bachira, of course, had to make things weirder. He started making airplane noises, rocking side to side like a child hyped up on sugar. "Choo-choo! Here comes the flavor train! Next stop: Meguru’s curiosity!"

      You shot him a look, exasperated. "Are you seriously narrating this?"

      "Of course! This is a historic moment!" he declared, placing a dramatic hand over his heart.

      His laughter bubbled up as he watched you, his gaze filled with that signature mix of chaotic excitement and genuine affection. "Y’know, I gotta say," he mused, tilting his head, "I love the way your brain works. Completely unhinged. Just my type."

      His endless enthusiasm made it impossible not to laugh. "You’re ridiculous."

      "And you love it," he shot back, beaming.

      “Oh–oh! Oh this is… this is better than I was expecting~” Bachira moaned as you put his fruit roll up covered cock all the way into your mouth.

      “Yeah?” You hummed, the vibrations from your words contributing to his pleasure

      “Oh yeah, please, don’t stop.” He shut his eyes, his hands finding their way to your hair, entangling themselves in it.

      At the end of the day, Bachira was a whirlwind of chaos and sugar who made everything twice as fun, just by being himself. And oh how you loved him for it.

     Hyoma Chigiri

      Chigiri stared at you, utterly unimpressed. His crimson eyes flickered with disbelief as he took in your suggestion, arms crossed in a way that made him look like a prince being subjected to absolute nonsense. "You could have literally suggested anything else," he said, voice as flat as ever, "anything, and you went with fruit roll-ups?"

      You nodded enthusiastically.

      He exhaled sharply through his nose, pinching the bridge of it like this was giving him an actual migraine. "This has to be some weird diet trend I don’t know about," he muttered, shaking his head.

      "Not a diet," you corrected with a grin. "Just an experience."

      Chigiri gave you the most deadpan stare imaginable, like he was seriously reconsidering every life choice that had led him to this moment. But despite his apparent suffering, you could see the tiny twitch at the corner of his lips, threatening to betray him.

      After a few more seconds of dramatic silence, he sighed in surrender. "Fine," he relented, shifting his weight like a reluctant aristocrat about to partake in the peasantry. "But just this once. And don’t—" he paused, fixing you with a sharp gaze, "—get any on my sheets. I don’t want ants."

      You snorted. "That’s what you’re worried about?"

      "Obviously," he replied smoothly, flicking his silky, shiny hair over his shoulder like this was just another day of dealing with absolute chaos.

      You rolled your eyes, but he wasn’t done. "And if this ends up being terrible," he continued, narrowing his gaze, "you owe me. Big time."

      "Deal," you chirped, already enjoying how much this was ruffling his usually composed demeanor.

      As you prepared everything, Chigiri watched you like a hawk—arms crossed, gaze sharp, still looking vaguely offended by the entire ordeal. Yet, despite all his protests, there was no missing the curiosity lurking beneath his exasperation.

      He was trying way too hard to act like he wasn’t at least a little intrigued.

      And that was exactly why you loved messing with him.

      “What’s taking so l-” Before he could finish, you had him in your mouth. He froze for a moment, shocked, but quickly relaxed, melting like putty as you continued, savoring each movement as you slurped him up like a slushie.

      “D-don’t stop,” he groaned, eyes squeezed shut, clearly enjoying the experience.

      “I’m taking this is going well, and that I won’t have to owe you?” you asked, pulling away. You noticed the disappointed look on his face when you stopped.

      “We’re not finished yet. I’ll let you know when we’re done,” he replied, his frown deepening.

      “Sounds to me like you’re hoping I’ll keep going,” you teased. “but, you don’t have to tell me twice”

        Rin Itoshi

      Rin took one look at the fruit roll-ups in your hands, then glanced at you, and without missing a beat, he immediately turned on his heel and started walking away. "No."

      You blinked, staring after him. "No? Why not?"

      He didn’t even slow down as he walked away, his voice barely turning back to address you. "Because you’re insane."

      You gasped dramatically, hand on your chest. "Excuse me?"

      Rin rubbed his temples like he could already feel a headache forming. "Find someone else to entertain your sugar-fueled delusions," he called over his shoulder, completely unimpressed.

      You stood there, staring at his retreating form, half frustrated and half amused by his complete lack of enthusiasm for your idea.

      He came back five minutes later out of pure curiosity.

      He stood in the doorway for a moment, arms crossed, watching you with that look like he was contemplating whether he was about to make the worst decision of his life.

      "How set are you on this," he began with a sigh, his tone reluctant.

      “Very.”

      "This is a terrible idea." But despite his words, there was a faint twitch at the corner of his lips, and his eyes had softened ever so slightly. Yet, he still walked back into the room, eyeing the way you were on your knees.

      You grinned, clearly winning this battle.

      "Fine." He rolled his eyes, "I’ll humor you. But, this doesn’t mean I’m into this food fetish thing you got going on"

      You could tell he was trying his best to seem unaffected by the ridiculousness of it all, but there was no hiding the faint interest in his eyes as he watched you get to work.

      "One condition," Rin added, stepping a little closer now, as if finally accepting that he was going to be involved in whatever you were planning.

      You raised an eyebrow. "What’s that?"

      "Don’t make it weird," his eyes narrowed slightly as if trying to guard himself against whatever might come next.

      You leaned in with a grin. "No promises."

     Seishiro Nagi

      There was only the faintest hint of interest in his eyes as he leaned back on the pillows. He barely even moved, perfectly embodying the phrase ‘no thoughts, just vibes.’

      As you started preparing your… unique setup, Nagi just lounged there, sprawled out like a cat in the sun. He didn't have any objections, nor did he offer much in the way of encouragement. He simply watched, not bothered enough to care.

      "Seriously? You’re just letting me do this?" you asked.

      "Yeah, I guess," he replied, his eyes drifting shut for a moment as he stifled a yawn. His voice was so devoid of energy that it was impossible to tell if he was bored or just entertained by how over-the-top you were being.

      You kept going, not letting his disinterest stop you. After all, this was Nagi, his lack of reaction was practically a sign that you were doing something right.

      The only time Nagi actually stirred was when a stray piece of the fruit roll up fell on his stomach, just within his reach. Without even opening his eyes, he lazily reached for it, grabbed it, and popped it into his mouth with zero fanfare.

      "Huh. Tasty," he muttered, completely unfazed. He didn’t even bother elaborating or making a face.

      "You’re so weird," you said, shaking your head, but secretly enjoying the way he just went with it.

      "Says you," Nagi scoffed with a lazy grin, his eyes flicking over to you briefly.

      "That’s why you love me." you smiled before taking him in, enjoying the way the fruit roll up melted in your mouth agains the heat of your warm tongue. Nagi hissed at the feeling, giving you the first reaction of this whole ordeal.

      “How does it feel?” You asked, pulling away to wipe the drool off your lips.

      “Feels like…” He paused, thinking for a moment. “Like you should keep going.”

          Reo Mikage

      Reo nearly choked on air when you casually dropped the suggestion, his entire body stiffening in surprise. "Excuse me—what?" he managed, his voice high and incredulous. You, on the other hand, were entirely unphased, raising an eyebrow at his dramatic reaction.

      "Fruit. Roll. Ups." you said slowly, as if that explained everything.

      "I heard you. I just… why?" Reo blinked several times, mouth hanging open as he tried to process what you’d just said. He reached for his glass of water, clearly trying to calm himself down, but it only served to make the situation worse. He buried his face in his hands with a long, exasperated sigh, as if he was somehow both embarrassed and horrified.

      "I swear, this is why rich people get accused of having weird kinks," he muttered, his voice muffled by the palms of his hands.

      You smirked, leaning back casually, clearly enjoying the sight of his spiraling. "Well, you know what they say, if the shoe fits," you teased.

      "I don’t even know where to begin with this suggestion."

      You shrugged, nonchalant as ever. "It’s simple. Fruit Roll-Ups. You wrap it around things. You eat it. End of story."

      "I—" He stopped himself, pinching the bridge of his nose like he was trying to stave off a headache. His eyebrows furrowed in disbelief, his usual grace and composure slipping for just a moment. "Why Fruit Roll-Ups of all things? Why not… I don’t know, something normal like chocolate or honey or strawberries or—anything that makes sense?"

      "Why not?" you countered with a teasing grin. "It’s fun, it’s colorful, it’s sugary. What’s not to love?"

      "I… I just can’t believe you’re serious about this." He leaned back in his chair.

      "Come on, Reo," you prodded, trying not to laugh at his genuine discomfort. "What’s the worst that could happen?”

      “It’s just weird, alright?”

      "I mean, it’s not like you have to do it, but…" You paused for effect, watching his every move.

      He let out a dramatic groan, the sound of someone utterly defeated. "I’m going to regret this, aren’t I?"

      "Maybe," you teased, enjoying the drama unfolding before you. "But isn’t that what makes it fun?"

      “This is fun to you?”

      "You’re right," you said with a playful grin. "I should’ve suggested something weirder. Like… jelly beans and pickles."

      His eyes went wide. "No! Absolutely not! I have some standards, okay? My dick isn’t some candy buffet, Y/n, damn.”"

      “Aw, man.” You pouted, pretending to be disappointed.

      "You’re insane. But fine," he said after a beat, finally giving in, his voice resigned. "If this is what you want, I’ll play along, but just so you know, I will be silently judging you this whole time."

      You raised an eyebrow. "Judging me? Oh please, I’m gonna make you a mess under me.”

      The thought sent a shiver down Reo’s body. He was getting mad at himself from how turned on he was starting to get. "Whatever. Let’s just get this over with— JESUS CHRIST WOMAN, YOU COULD’VE GAVE ME A WARNING.”

      Yeah, he came three times.

           Sae Itoshi

      Sae just stared at you. Then at the fruit roll up. Then back at you.

      "You need therapy."

      “Sae, what the hell.” You gasp.

      He raised an eyebrow, clearly confused by your silent, almost eager stare. “You’re weird,” he muttered, a little edge to his tone. “Why would I let you do that?”

      You shrugged innocently, feeling a little giddy, “I just think it would be fun.”

      You leaned in just a bit, your eyes twinkling with mischief. “Come on, Sae. Don’t tell me you’re not curious.”

      His gaze flickered to the fruit roll-up again, then back to your face, his expression still unreadable. “You need serious help.”

      You simply frowned, the corners of your mouth turning down with a playful defiance. “You’re not going to let me? Really?”

      "No." He replied, his voice steady and unbothered, almost too simple.

      "Saeee..." You stretched his name out dramatically, your eyes wide with pleading. "Please?"

      He raised an eyebrow, his expression resigned. "What kind of pleasure do you get from this, other than tormenting me?"

      "It’ll be fun, I swear," you insisted with a hopeful grin.

      He shook his head, sighing deeply as though he couldn’t believe the words coming from your mouth. "This isn’t fun, Y/n. This is odd. You’re odd. I’ve already said no, so stop asking."

      Defeated, you let out a heavy sigh, your shoulders slumping in exaggerated disappointment. Slowly, you walked off to put the box of fruit roll-ups back, doing your best to suppress the letdown you were feeling.

      Later that day, you were sitting on the couch, sulking a little, when you heard the familiar shuffle of his footsteps. Surprised, you looked up to see him standing in front of you, a box of fruit roll-ups in hand. He refused to make eye contact, simply shoving the box into your hands without a word.

      You blinked at him, completely caught off guard. "What’s this?"

      He grumbled, his voice almost a growl. "Fine. You can do it."

      Your jaw dropped in disbelief. "Really? What made you change your mind?"

      He rolled his eyes, clearly irritated but unable to hide the hint of frustration beneath his words. "Does it even matter? Just... let’s get this over with before I change my mind again."

      "Okay! Yippie!" You exclaimed.

      Without wasting a second, you leapt up from the couch, your excitement bubbling over. You wrapped your arms around him in a tight hug, planting kisses all over his face in a flurry of joy before dragging him to the bedroom to give him the most toe-tingling, sheet-gripping, jaw-breaking blow job of his entire life all with his dick wrapped in a fruit roll up.

          Michael Kaiser

      “What’s… this?” Kaiser asked, his voice tinged with both curiosity and slight confusion as he watched you settle comfortably between his legs, unwrapping a brightly colored fruit roll-up.

      You gave him a nonchalant glance, still focused on your task. “A fruit roll-up,” you answered simply, as though the answer was obvious.

      He didn’t even flinch as you casually unzipped his pants, a move that was second nature between the two of you. There was no hesitation, no awkwardness. You had an unspoken understanding, a rhythm that allowed such actions to be taken without question. You both made sure to check in with each other, confirming mutual comfort and consent, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t curious when you did.

      Kaiser eyed you intenty, his gaze flickering between your hands and your face, the curiosity and interest clear in his expression. It wasn’t often that he had to wonder about your next move.

      “I can see that,” he murmured, the hint of a smile playing on his lips, though his eyes narrowed in on you. “But what exactly are you doing?”

      “I’m wrapping it around your dick while I suck you off.” You say casualy.

      “What?” He looked at you like you were insane. “The fuck?”

      You threw a Fruit Roll-Up at his face, the candy whizzing through the air and slapping against his cheek with an audible squelch.

      He blinked, clearly caught off guard by it, his expression shifting to one of disbelief as he slowly peeled the sticky fruit snack off his skin. “The hell? What’d you do that for?” he frowned, his voice laced with confusion.

      “You talk too much,” you said, your tone cool. “Just let me suck you off with a fruit roll up around it.”

      Kaiser’s eyes widened slightly, a mixture of surprise and curiosity flashing in them. “I never said yes,” he replied, his voice steady, though there was a hint of challenge beneath it.

      You raised an eyebrow, unfazed. “You never said no,”

      Kaiser chuckled, the deep sound of amusement escaping him. “You're a strange one, aren’t you?” He smirked, resting his chin in his hand, eyes glinting with something that bordered between mischief and intrigue. “But I like strange. It keeps things interesting."

      He leaned forward slightly, making the moment feel far more dramatic than it had any right to be. He seemed to take your little silly idea and blow it up, turning it into some high-class, avant-garde experience, as if he were about to set the stage for a grand performance.

      “If we’re doing this,” he grabbed your chin, tilting your face to have your gaze meet his, “we do it my way.”

          Ryusei Shidou

      Shidou didn’t hesitate. His excitement was instant and electric, the mischievous gleam in his eyes only growing as he took a step toward you, rubbing his hands together like a mad scientist about to unveil his latest, chaotic experiment.

      “Fuck yeah! Let’s get weird!” he cheered, his voice booming with confidence.

      You blinked at him, barely processing his enthusiasm, but the way he immediately dove into brainstorming ideas made you grin despite yourself. Shidou was never one to shy away from insane shit like this.

      “What if we melt chocolate on it? Or dip it in Red Bull? OOH, what if we—”

      “Ryu, no,” you cut him off, shaking your head, but even as you spoke, you couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculous the possibilities were. Chocolate and Red Bull? He was serious about it too, you could see it in his eyes.

      “Ryu, yes.” He pushed back.

      His unwavering energy propelling him into territory you weren’t even sure you’d signed up for. A fruit roll-up was one thing, but now, the absurd ideas were starting to sound less like wild jokes and more like they could actually happen.

      “Just imagine, Y/n. We could put gummy bears on it. Or maybe marshmallows. Maple syrup. Do you even know how good that would be?”

      You stared at him, trying to process the combination of ingredients he was suggesting. The thought alone made your stomach do the thing (your pancreas crying from that diabetic nightmare), but for some reason, you could almost see it working. You did like those snacks,

      But still, you had to draw a line somewhere.

      “Red bull? Isn’t that a little... too much? Like, even for you?”

      Shidou’s face lit up like a lightbulb. “Not enough,” he said matter-of-factly, throwing his arms wide in dramatic flair. “It needs to be bold, right? We’re talking flavor explosion. This isn’t a snack, it’s a masterpiece.”

      “Let’s just start with the fruit roll-up, we’ll think about the other stuff after.”

      Shidou looked disappointed for all of two seconds before a devilish grin crossed his face again. “Deal. But just so you know, you’ve opened Pandora’s box. I’m not responsible for where this goes.”

      You couldn’t help but chuckle. The man was practically salivating over the idea of you giving him blowjobs with various snacks on his dick.

      You unwrapped the fruit roll-up slowly, the shiny, sticky paper catching the light. Shidou purred at the sight of your delicate hands working so meticulously into wrapping it around his throbbing cock. You looked so pretty, all concentrated as you did the strangest things with him. That’s why he loved you, you matched his freak.

      By the time it was all over, Shidou had somehow convinced you to incorporate donuts, bagels, whipped cream, honey, and even the gummy worms he so desperately wanted you to use. When the chaos finally settled, your throat ached, your stomach full, and your face was a mess—covered in a mix of food crumbs, sugar, and the remnants of his sweet, milky cum.

anyway. going to intentionally not watch the last 20 minutes of the anime so I can pretend like sanemi is actually married 2 me

haha i do that without rewatching it

*thinks abt characters having a domestic life* oh god. Oh fuck. *trascends into the next astral plane*

crying at this pinterest interaction i just saw

me me me when I

This is so me‼️

having poor circulation is great because people will touch your hand and go 'oh! you're so cold!' and for a moment you get to experience what it's like to be a vampire in a romance novel

Help, I’ve been called out.

Silver Wolf: Blade, I'm going out for lunch. If the Sims I trapped in the bedroom finally fall in love, text me IMMEDIATELY. Yes, I know they look like you and Kafka.