Vlog - Blog Posts

I don’t like to talk about my private life often but I felt like an update was needed. A few months ago I had a pretty rough crush that ended up in a rejection and my friends at work are leaving in a few months, so I’m coping with that a lot. 

Work hasn’t been easy, not to say a pain lately, and a week ago by health really spiraled further and I had to stay at home for about a week. On top of that, I’ve had an expensive unplanned electricity bill to pay this month and it really hasn’t been easy, had to clear it with savings money and it kinda hurts...

I have to go back to work but am not fully recovered. I’m exhausted and I don’t feel happy lately, to say the least. I’m trying to draw at least once a day to find some sort of escapism from this situation but I am very very slow to the process, barely managing to sit still for a few hours. I will keep on working on commissions but will be much much slower (not that it’s anything new, sorry for you my dears, I truly feel awful about this).

I’ll share my sketches in “packs” rather than individually posting them here, in the meantime, if you want to keep track of them, head over to my IG or Twitter where I post more often lately.

Thank you.  See you soon,

Cyn.

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The Ballroom in a now Disused Psychiatric Hospital in Wales, UK. Only been closed 2 years.. Quick video from inside here - https://youtu.be/DP6GaQ3tS94

Nova resenha do livro Mônica!

Não perca, e, por gentileza, divulgue bastante! Obrigadããããoooo!

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baterist offical video♥️❤️⚡🎸🎸💃

WHO IS ATATÜRK OF artificial intelligence

HAV HAV HAV Offical  😄

Hav Hav Hav Yeni Versiyon Offical Video 😄

Anish Khadna (SANO NETA)पागल भारतीय संगीत कार्यक्रम offical videoViral crazy Indian concert This video has been watched 8,500,000 times in 1 month, interesting⚡♥️✨🌟🫠🫠🫠😉

I write letters that never get written back.

I write letters that never get written back. I send love that is never received. I say thank you to those that don't appreciate it. I say things that don’t mean as much to the person they’re said to. I run when things get hard. I’m quiet when I feel out of place. I roll my eyes when I’m too scared to speak my truth. Maybe it’s time to burn those letters. Leave those rooms. Speak with my chest. Run into the fire and face everything head on. But here I stand. Quiet. Alone. In my own head as it’s always been.

Depression makes me feel like a dull knife, you know you can still use it but it’s still dull even after it’s sharpened. Try as much as you can, use as much force as you need but the knife will always be, dull. Maybe you’re too lazy to sharpen it thoroughly, maybe you’re too attached to let it go. So it sits there. In your drawer beside the newly sharpened knives, unused, useless, and there in memoriam.

“You should write a novel about your life”

“You should write a novel about your life”, something she’d often hear. Yeah sure, her life was— peculiar to say the least and I guess it’s a life worth the write but it definitely wasn’t something anyone actually wanted to hear. Especially on the precipice of their roaring twenties. Who has a life that bad before their twenties that it’s worth writing about? She didn’t wanna hear that, feel it, especially when she wanted to make something out of herself first. Or maybe too often it was the idea of having to make something out of herself that had burdened her. The struggle, it had to have been worth it of course if she.. made something out of herself. Right?

You turn 18 and you can vote, so you celebrate turning 18. You turn 19, okay no one actually celebrates that, you’re just 19. You turn 20 and damn you’re 20, you’re just a twenty-teen! You turn 21 and you celebrate being able to finally buy alcohol on your own and walk into bars like you’re the shit. You turn 22 and you celebrate .. what do you celebrate? Oh yeah, your Bachelor’s Degree. What about so on and so on? Is it twenty-teen until she’s thirty-teen? She’ll keep celebrating until it constantly feels like she's on the precipice of something great? And nothing actually ever fucking happens?

But she thought too, what happened to normalcy? The struggle to just be.. perfectly normal. Be alright. What about that? The movies had warped her idea that with struggle came greatness, but what if greatness was just— no longer being in that dark place and living a completely normal life? And with a sigh, she dropped her pen and began to wonder when she’d ever actually start writing.

[𝟒.𝟏𝟎]

today I: did laundry took out the trash discussion post drunk 2 bottles of water took Instagram pictures call grandpa and tell him happy birthday

my daily allotted complaining time:

I got a 75 on my exam, I expected a higher grade. I studied, but not nearly as much as I could have, and I am conflicted on my feelings about it. Last semester I failed the class, and this semester I was determined to do better, and I am, but I still struggle with taking test. I've never been good at taking test, in high school I could skate by with good grades because tests were never worth much and even if they were I could always do retakes, but I've been "learning" how to study, and even if I don't get a A in the class anything would be an improvement since last semester.

moral of the story:

today i wanted nothing more but to rot in bed, but I knew I shouldn't, its so easy to slip into a routine of doing only what is mandatory, but I made myself get up, and getting up was just the first stop. take the day one step/ task at a time, and it was relatively slow-moving to start, and I didn't accomplish nearly as much as I wanted to, but I did certainly more than I would have if I had left myself sit in bed all day and mindlessly scroll

Harry Potter Cosplay

So a while ago, I found this harry potter (in character) vlog thing, it had multiple episodes and there was Romione and Drarry, I know it was on YouTube, I just can’t find it anymore. I know one of the first episodes was a Christmas one, where The Golden trio + Draco were playing games, Ron gets offended by Draco (by accident) and Hermione gets so drunk that she dares Harry and Draco to kiss under the mistletoe. I wanted to find it again, and I’ve been looking through my watch history on YouTube, and even my search history, but I couldn’t find it and I was wondering if anyone else knew what I was talking about and knew what the series was called or who the creator was so I could find it again. If I end up finding it, I’ll reblog this post with what it is so others could watch it (if it’s still up that it)

Girl Hip hop dance show🤟💯❤️💥

drunk macbook vlog pt. 2

drunk macbook vlog hahahaaa

i was trying to get myself situated before recording a story time for my friend lol <3