The Biggest Con In History!

if i die my funerals gonna be the biggest fucken party and you’re all invited 

people who say feathered dinosaurs aren’t scary have never been dive bombed by a seagull for a french fry and it shows

Pansy & Hermione, at a bar

Hermione: Yoga helps you look and feel better naked.

Pansy: So does tequila. *downs 5 shots in a row*

Hermione: *stares at Pansy*

Pansy: See, you already can’t keep your eyes off me.

anyone else having a…hmm. what’s the word? Really Shit Time? 

#a plot twist to the joke

Zootopia (2016) dir. Byron Howard, Rich Moore

No one:

Absolutely no one:

Dick Grayson:

Source

hey sorry for not texting u back im depressed

english: coconut oil

french: :)

english: oh boy

french: oil of the nut of the coco

A human getting pissed at their vampire boyfriend so they put in a silver sterling tongue stud and bracelets and earrings and their vampire boyfriend is just standing five feet away like “babe. c’mon.”