Latest Posts by terrible-hated-demon - Page 2
bpd culture is when your fps tone changes alittle from how they usually talk and now you NEED to isolate yourself until they act “normal” to you again
.
We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.
final message: i love you people who were "scary" children. i love you people who attacked other people, who hurt animals, who destroyed people's things, on purpose or on accident. i love you people who got labeled "creepy" or "problem child" or "attention-seeking" or "manipulative". i love you people who got kicked out of class or suspended often, who got kicked out of schools, who transferred before you could get kicked, who didn't understand why they got in trouble. i love you students who failed classes, who'd cry in class, who'd sleep through class, who got sent to unhelpful counselors. you weren't at fault for being a struggling child, and i love you if you struggle feeling overwhelmingly guilty for how you acted as a child, and i love you if you dont. i especially love you if you struggle to see yourself as a good person because of whatever you did as a child. i love you people who cant remember what you did, but are told it makes you bad. you are not defined by the actions of your child self, and you are able to choose who to be as you are now. if you have the capacity and interest to make amends, you can, and its also okay to not do that and just leave it all behind. i love you all the same.
bpd culture is going from “end of the world” to “everything is okay” in 10 minutes
.
dunno who needs to hear this but sometimes people don't want you to improve they want to constantly make you do self flagellation. find many more reasons why you can't and hold shit, especially shit from years ago, over your head as a block. it's fine to not forgive someone but if you see a person not making the same mistakes again, and infact are trying to make amends for their actions and do every possible thing they can to get better, then let them be. nobody is fucking perfect, especially to those who are barely starting adulthood.
BPD culture is seeing yourself/relating to horrible characters and people, and having others shame you for it despite the fact that you can't control that, and if you could you gladly would because you would much rather be able to fit in and have a normal amount of empathy and a good morality than relate to/sympathize with literal murderers
.
Bpd culture is having two playlists for whether you love them or hate them
.
i have impulsive bpd but i only get impulses to cut and dye my hair i would never do anything to hurt anyone because i'm a good boy 😇
the 'wow you're so emotionally mature for your age!' to having the I can't regulate my emotions disorder pipeline is real
BPD culture is easily starting to hate someone i thought i liked only because they raised their voice at me or made a joke that was a little too mean and now i want them dead
.
BPD culture is wanting to know who your fp is talking to and if they're talking about you, and if, god forbid, they are, what they're saying, at all times, because you're so scared they're secretly telling their friends how much they hate you.
And you also want to know when they go out and with who, so you don't have to find out from other people that they went out with mutual friends and didn't invite you, so you can stop feeling like they don't want you around.
-🐊🪐
.
i have tourettes where I say sudden funny things but never any slurs because I am good boy 😇 I have OCD but not the one that makes me really concerned about piss and shit but the movie one that makes me line things up properly nice and neat because I am a good boy 😇 I have bipolar but not the one that makes me act embarrassingly in public because I am on the highest point of a downward curving emotional pendulum swing, but the one that makes me creative af via safely utilizing my tendency towards extreme emotions in my art (because I am a good boy 😇) I have autism but it's the one like from the movies where I'm good at math or being a detective, and not the one that makes other people hate me so bad they want to kill me because I am annoying to them. because I am a good boy 😇 I have schizophrenia too but I also don't, because somehow in the cultural lexicon no one who has schizophrenia is a good boy and there is rarely a stylistic bullshit depiction of the condition, but I'm still a good boy 😇 society knows this. society knows this.
Heh heh heh 😈
suspected bpd culture is genuinely believing your cause of death will be suicide because you are aware that this disorder is slowly eating away your hope and energy to continue living, making it impossible to live normally.
.
the DSM-5 defines narcissism as being characterized in part by a "need for admiration." while this is true for most of us, i think it's a bit of an oversimplification to identify every narcissist's supply needs as just "admiration."
many narcissists just want acknowledgement. supply may not just mean praise and reverence, but also simple care. not a need to be worshiped and treated as godlike, but to be spoken to and treated as an important human being.
others may not just get supply from positive attention, but also negative attention. i've heard others talk about reveling in the thought of being the subject of someone else's resentment or hatred, just because it makes them an important figure in their life.
some narcissists seek out any attention, regardless of whether it contributes to an idolizing reputation; narcissists who become self-destructive because they know it'll get people's attention.
i think most narcissists appreciate admiration, but narcissistic supply isn't just that. what all narcissists have in common is that we need more attention than most people, be it because we were deprived of it when we needed it most or because we never learned how to live without it.
regardless, none of us really have the innate ability to feel important and appreciated unless we're given as much attention we can get.
tw vent submission
suspected BPD + self-evaluated AudHD culture is finally getting the courage to cut off your (suspected) FP after repeatedly having your boundaries disregarded and allowing your own mental health to deteriorate for the sake of preserving theirs and STILL having moments of soul-crushing guilt, paranoia, and anxiety despite knowing it was for the best. it's feeling like such a fool and feeling like you should've seen the red flags sooner. it's realizing just how unfair it was that you were held to a more strict standard in the relationship than they were and splitting on them because you feel so betrayed. it's breaking down multiple times because you feel like you're just giving up on them and maybe they'll finally change after you showed them the damage they caused you. it's being so scared and paranoid about even sending in asks to talk about this because what if they see this and retaliate against me for cutting them off and speaking about this publicly even if anonymously? it's being unable to focus because of the overwhelming amount of emotions you're feeling at one time. it's struggling to reach out to those who are supporting you because you don't want to be a bother.
-🌻
.
tw sh mentions
i wish this anger would go somewhere else that isnt just myself or God forbid my fps im so angry im so constantly frustrated i hate i hate i hate and its so so so stupid i just want to Maul somnething and rip and tear it until its just cotton but i cant and i dont want that hate to be directed towards people i love even if my thoughts make me want to Yell Yell Yell so its just me im my own therapist i scream at myself i hate myself i want to bang m y head until it beleeds until i calm down and it just happens AgaiN AND AGAINand im so.
tired.
and none of the people i love will ever know, because it doesnt matter in the end, does it.
-🐊 (is it ok if you also tagged the previous post about finding out your fp has a partner with 🐊 ? i forgot to tag it in the moment)
.
tw sui ideations + jealousy + a lotta self hate
Why does it hurt why does it hurt why does it hurt Why does it hurt so much when i find out my fp has a partner fuck fuck fuck this is so stupid i literally am dating someone romantically and my relationship with my fp is strictly platonic so why does it hurtso much when i found out xe's dating someone Am i that scared of abandonment fuck this is so stupid fuck i hate this i hate myself im so scared i might lose xyr fuck i made a mistake getting too comfortable fuck xyrd be suspicious if i just started distancing myself from xyr and our friend group but god it hurts so much god i hate relationships so much i wish i could just bury myself alive god god i dont know what to do i really wished i just killed myself i wished one of my two attempts succeeded it hurts So much to be alive knowing this i wish i didnt have bpd i wish i didnt have to deal with this i wished i was alone but i have to stay strong i guess i have to Stay alive just for everyone i love and i fucking hate it i hate being loved please stop loving me it isnt worth it please please let me die alone crying myself to sleep
.
bpd culture is just go ahead and tell me right in the face that i'm annoying. dont act like youre alright talking to me. you probably talk shit about me behind my back, saying that i'm so fucking annoying and humiliating and disgusting.
.
nd culture is feeling like everyone hates you and not understanding why
.
can everyone be nice to me forever
bpd culture is sending way too many asks directed to ur fp and now ur overthinking that they'll see the asks you sent and if they do its so fucking over (sorry if i sent so many asks btw lol)
You're okay
ND culture is getting very irrationally angry around midnight, and having no idea why… it could’ve been because I didn’t like the fanfic I was reading, or it could’ve been hormones, or it could be an ND thing, or maybe it’s some secret fourth thing (all of the above).
.
BPD culture is being so worried that someone (esp your fp) doesn’t like you that you get physically sick just thinking of them
-🫚
.