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Edblr how are we
Ngl an ana coach would be nice.
I started a whole new routine and it's so much better than it was.
As much as I don't like working out and sweating I decided to put effort in.
An hour and a half on the treadmill is not that much.
I don't like vanilla cherry diet coke but I feel like I need it, because it would probably prevent me from eating.
I was "fasting" all day but ate at night when I came home so it feels like I cheated. 12 hours basically out of the window.
I don't understand why I can't stop myself. Not too long ago was so easy.
So new years! Yippee! Things are gonna get better and I will be skinnier.
Aaa i am so bad at blogging damn. I have been neglecting my tumblr so much im sorry :((
I made a discord server for 18+ @n@/m1a/3d peeps who like anime and games!
There are lots of stuffs there already lmao. Gaming channel, anime channel, vent and a bunch of 3d related ones like th1nspø, m3alspø, tips and shared mesdia! You can reccomend your favourite music, movie that triggers you.
There is not a lot of people on it, and it's still under "construction", so suggestions are welcome!
I decided that I am kot gonna date things lmao. Kinda feeling mentay frustrated, so I hoped a break would make it better. It, in fact, did not.
I am in one discord server and people are really really nice, but I feel like I abandoned that server and I just dunno. I'd like a community where I can ramble about my silly things and people motivate eachother to push through things. Don't get me wrong, like I said they are really nice, motivating and everything. I just feel like I didn't connect much, but that can be just me.
Anyhow, a gaming-ana server is what I wanna make. For sillies that are like me idk. I might just need more friends lmaoo.
Also I have been fasting for two days now but my period just decided to come, so ugh. Fortunately whenever it happens I don't feel much hunger, so I can just fast and be happy. I am planning on going til saturday because I am meeting up with a friend that day and we already made plans to visit a café. Im sure he will make a suggestion to eat something somewhere too.
So yes yippee. That is for this update. I might restart the logging.
The last week was shitty in terms of starving myself. I plateaued at 73 and I haven't been gaining which is nice, but I haven't been losing either.
Because of the holidays, birthdays and other events I couldn't avoid eating normal amounts but sadly I have been craving things I haven't craved in a long time and it's making me crazy.
For example I really don't like white bread, yet I broke my 72 hour fast after the 27th hour because I had this instant need for it. I looked at the slice, conteplated only a little and bit into it. It was such a big slice too. I knew I can't eat it, that I shouldn't eat it, yet I still did.
Fucking other weight losing tactics haven't worked on me before only starving myself did. Only restricting my calorie intake to 800-400-200 did. What am I supposed to do? Stop because I failed even at something so simple like not fucking stuffing my mouth?
I even ate KFC like a pig. Ate the grander and the twist thing then drank the pumpkin spice shake. I knew I shouldn't but I couldn't stop. The craving and the hunger for it was too much.
God I wanna cry. I wanna tear everything out. They were so good, but for how long? Until I finished watching a moist critical video, which was 10 minutes long.
Why can't I wait? Why can't I control it? I hate it so much.
I am so bad at blogging my things lmaoo. At least i didn't eat today, tristamp kept me distracted for a little while 💕💕
What the hell noone told me losing weight is so addictive. I can already feel my hipbone and ribs so much????
Someone please keep me in check when I am fasting
I love my wrists because they are not thick and I can see how much I have already lost but every damn fucking time i look at my ankles I wanna cry because they are so thick.
For what reason??? Ugh...
I JUST REACHED MY FIRST GW!!!! AAAAA
I noticed yesterday that creame colored flare jeans were looser on me than last time and I am really happy.
Same with my mom fit kinda jeans and my fave pink sweater. It is exhilarating to notice these things.
Mom told me I am getting super skinny 🥰🥰