Will U Ever Make A 2nd Fic Of Save Us All??? I’m So Intrigued About How It Ends!! (sorry If That Sentence

this is the most beautiful thing i ever seen in my life

e m p t y / 10

shingeki no kyojin | series [various x male!amnesiac!reader] summary: [Name], an amnesiac boy awakes in a unknown place – trying to remember anything makes him have horrible headaches. Who is he? And why he can’t remember his own face? masterlist

chapter ten — first day

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Standing with everyone else, looking straight without a hint of emotion. This was their first day as a soldier.

[Name] had matured— his eyes were gentle, but with the horror seen by them made them harder. His cheeks blushed a little by the sun— it was a hot day after all. And with the uniform on... ugh... He felt already soaked inside the jacket.

He could hear the yells from the instructor, shouting at some kid far away from his line. Even if he was far away, it seemed he was just besides him. [Name] bet the man could be heard to Wall Sina.

Deep in his thoughts, he didn't catch a certain pair of eyes looking at him curiously. But thanks to his instincts, he feel it, quickly making him look for them. He traveled his unusual eyes trough the line in front of him who were facing him, and finally, [Name] spotted a very tall guy with hazel eyes looking at him. But just when he meet his eyes, he blushed and averted his dull gaze.

"He is very tall..." [Name] thought, admiring his height. He thought maybe he was the tallest soldier around here. The teenager could tell he knew [Name] was watching him, because he began to sweat. Is the sun or is it me?

Hearing the instructor coming near, [Name] quickly looked straight. The man just walked by, until he saw [Name]'s form and began to shout at him immediately without mercy.

"You! Who the hell are you and from where?!"

Saluting, he shouted, "[Name] Knight, sir! From Shinganshina, sir!"

The tall man blinks when he takes a good look at the unusual eyes— and he remembers who he is instantly. He was the kid from the outside... He remembers that last name too well. A Knight, uh?

"And why the hell are you here, you maggot?!"

Without thinking much of it, a natural response left his lips, like an automatic reply or as if someone replied for him, "To free us, sir!"

"We'll see what a good for nothing like you would do against a titan, maggot!" He yelled, leaving him to go for another cadet. [Name] sighed, relieved he was gone. He wasn't a fan of being yelled or having to raise his voice.

" e —— ???? xxxx free!"

A migraine began to take effect on him, making a frown shift his gentle features. Not now, just wait a little more— it's almost over. But the headache didn't listen to the poor boy, and just began to hurt with more force. He gritted your teeth, bearing the pain. The sun didn't help his situation at all, too.

Thanks to the pain, [Name]'s mind was occupied on calming himself, making him lost any attention to other's peoples names or where the intimidating man was, and certainly, he didn't feel a pair of green eyes looking at him with surprise. When the headaches happened he ignored everything around him, specially when the pain was high. He didn't even noticed his friend getting head-butted by the instructor.

Somehow, [Name] noticed 'presentation time' was over by seeing all of the cadets walking off. Just, how much time has passed? Wait— where did he have to go?

Placing a hand on his head to control his headache, —that somehow worked— he heard someone approaching, making him turn just to see his friend Jean. He was frowning at him— was he worried?

"[Name]... again with the headaches?" He asked, gently placing a hand on his head, relieving a little pain feeling his warm hand, "maybe there will—"

Before he could finish, a new male voice interrupted him, along with three people quickly approaching both of them, "[Name]!!"

[Name]'s eyes immediately widened, "that voice..." Turning behind him, he meet with the determinated eyes he have always admired. They are alive!

Forgetting about the pain, [Name] tried to say something. But before any of the two of them could react, the brunette with green eyes have tightly hugged [Name], making both of them fall on the ground. But the amnesiac teenager couldn't feel any pain when he was overjoyed and happy— his friends were safe.

"[Name], we thought you were..." A gently voice could be heard, knowing very well who belonged it to. [Name] looks at the blond with soft blue eyes, who looks he's going to cry. "We didn't see you anywhere!"

The black haired girl makes Eren to stand by his disappointment, and quickly helps [Name] stand along. "We look for you when we could, but we never found you..." She says, looking at him as if she didn't believe he was there.. Her eyes looks gentle and soft, and a small smile appear on her delicate lips.

"Where the hell were you!?" The brunette angrily asked, surprising everyone by his outburst, "you didn't look for us, did you!?" Eren spoke with a different tone— he was upset. Mikasa and Armin looked at him in worry: the brunette always got mad when he thought about [Name] back then.

"I—I left as fast as I could with mom and... we got with the refugees and..." [Name] spoke shyly, not expecting such angry behavior this soon, "we went to Trost... and I lived there..." The amnesiac boy didn't find the words to reply back— just as he found his friends he felt fragile, feeling emotions at once.

"Did you think about us when you left?" He frowned, looking at is side feeling hurt, "to think I was worried you were... dead, and after all you—!"

"Hey!" Jean, who was pretty silent with the reunion, shout, getting their attention, shoved [Name] behind him, "[Name] saved his mom's and his' life first! At what you are so angry about?!"

"Aah?! And who the hell are you?!" Eren clenched his fists, not liking one a bit how easy he touched [Name]. This coward is [Name]'s friend?!

"None of your business, dumbass! But I won't stand here and hear your nonsense against him!" Jean could get protective over [Name], even if it wasn't that necessary. But seeing how this idiot wanted to make all of what happened his fault, that wasn't going to happen. He could see [Name] was troubled— he just reunited who the friends he thought were dead, but being pointed at while he was happy made him utterly upset.

"Eren!" Armin tried to calm him down, "[Name] is alive and with us again, aren't you happy?" Mikasa frowned, looking at Eren with concern. She could notice her brother had mixed feelings about finding [Name]— the ravenette knew his anger would disappear eventually, but he had to control it to not say hurtful things that could upset [Name]. But as Armin and she knew, he didn't think before speaking. Mikasa could notice [Name]'s frown from behind his friend— such a sad look that didn't belong.

Eren gritted his teeth, grunting. He knew he was being an idiot to make [Name] feel like this— but just as he saw him again... it made a mess with his feelings that he couldn't control well. At times like these it was better to walk off before hurting more. He gave one last pained look at [Name], "I— See you around, [Name]." He left, clearly mad. Armin gave one last tight hug to [Name] with Mikasa.

"Don't mind him, [Name]. He's happy to see you, you know? He's just... very sentimental as you know," Armin tried to laugh it off awkwardly.

"I guess... It's understandable," [Name] still had his sad look— he was really happy to see his friends again, but the feeling of guilt overcome his joy. Was it wrong to put his family first?

"I'm happy to see you again, [Name]." Mikasa gently spoke, smiling at him, "these past years had been difficult, but I'm glad you are alright with Miss Beatrice. We... we lost mom."

"And grandpa too..."

[Name] gulped. Carla, the pretty woman that always opened her doors for him, was gone too. Armin's grandpa was gone too. He couldn't understand how they were feeling after loosing their family like that. "W-What about Dr. Jäger...?"

She sighs, "we don't know," she looks at [Name] with a cryptic expression, "but seeing you here makes me glad you are safe."

"I'm glad I could see you again too," he attempted to smile, trying to make himself better. He hugged Mikasa and Armin, "I really missed you."

Armin laughed happily and Mikasa smiled warmly. Jean stood there awkwardly, frowning by what just happened before. The trio eventually finished the hug, pulling away. Both friends waved at [Name], saying they were going to unpack their things and find Eren. [Name] waved at them with a smile, feeling slightly better.

"You didn't tell me your friend was an idiot," Jean spoke, still angry.

"I didn't think he would be like that... but I guess he's still sentimental." [Name] sighs, rubbing his forehead, "at least my headache is gone."

Jean sighs heavily, already in a bad mood in the first day. Patting [Name]’s head, he spoke, “already the first day and I already hate someone.”

”Eren is not that bad. He’s just... reckless.” They began to walk to the dormitory.

“In other words, a dumbass.” [Name] chuckles, agreeing a little, "also, that girl is pretty..."

As they get into the dormitory, many of the people who were already there began to pick their beds. [Name] didn’t exactly care with who he had to share his bed with, but Jean certainly did. His friend hurriedly tried to find free shared beds, but he couldn't find any. Jean cursed mentally, grunting as he realized he wouldn't share a bed with [Name]. Could he be more unlucky today?

While Jean got angry in silence, [Name] already choose a free bed and began to unpack his stuff. Yawning, the boy couldn't wait to sleep already.

"Hey! Looks like we are sharing!" A freckled boy spoke to him, making him turn. He had dark hair and by just looking at his eyes there was no malice— only kindness. [Name] nodded, not knowing what else to say. Fortunately, the freckled male didn't back off, "I'm Marco Bodt, nice to meet you!"

"[Name] Knight. Nice to meet you, Marco."

Just as both unpacked their things Marco did most of the chatter. [Name] didn't mind him— his voice was soft and gentle. He liked hearing him, and the freckled didn't mind [Name]'s silence, so that was nice. It seemed he had notices [Name]'s unusual eyes too, but didn't say anything about them.

Jean's absence didn't last long. The irritated teenager found [Name], and as he saw his friend already being so comfortably with someone made him narrow his eyes in suspicion. He approached him, "[Name], you found a bed?"

Both of them turned. [Name] nodded, sitting on the bed as he stretched. "He's Marco."

"A-Ah! Hello!" Marco smiled, and Jean only stared at him with narrowed eyes. It was clear miles away this boy didn't mean harm— but why would Jean even care about that?

"Hi," Jean sighed heavily, rubbing his neck trying to calm himself, "I'm Jean."

"Uhm— what you said back there..." Marco spoke, not sure if to proceed but did nevertheless, "you were really honest."

"Hmn?" [Name]'s brow raised, "what happened?"

"You didn't see?" [Name] shook his head, noticing Jean's blush, "he got... well, he got head-butted by the instructor."

"He did?" [Name] couldn't hold his chuckle. Just imagining his friend being attacked by Shadis was funny, shame his migraine didn't let him see such show. "What did you say to get that?"

"It's not important anymore!" Jean yelled, clearly embarrassed, "anyways! We should change already— dinner will be in some hours so..."

"Oh, right! It's nice we don't have to do anything on our first day..."

[Name], already irritated by the tightness of his uniform, stood up from the bed and began to undress himself without any care.

Both boys noticed his actions, blush appearing on their faces immediately.

"H-Hey! [Name], what are you doing?!" Jean spoke trying to stop him, but only receiving a slap on his wrists.

"Undressing." He answered, unbuttoning his shirt.

Jean realized this was going to be until the end of their training— as the trainee corps had limited expenses, it was clear there was no "dressing room" or private showers. Every man and woman had to share and see each other without clothes, so their shyness had to go away forcefully.

Just the thought of seeing [Name] in the shower made him blush. Covering his mouth, Jean thought wasn't that bad after all...

Marco averted seeing [Name] taking his pants off, crimson appearing on his face. He tried to shake off the awkwardness of the situation, "w-well! W-Where are you two f-from?!"

Jean and Marco tried their best to hold a conversation without seeing [Name] changing without any care in the world. When he finished, the amnesiac teenager laid on the bed and told them to wake him up when it was time for dinner. Marco was surprised seeing him asleep in about five minutes, but Jean had explained [Name]'s favorite hobby was sleeping every time he could, so it was normal he fell asleep quickly. The freckled boy was rather impressed.

  From not too far away a brunette and a blonde saw everything with a blush on their faces.

"Idiot...!"

"W-Well! He really is the same, ah?"

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"[Name], wake up. It's time."

The amnesiac boy grunted, frowning as he opened his eyes lazily, spotting Jean. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he stretched and yawned. Jean knew when [Name] woke up, it would be five or even ten minutes of him being semi-awake, so he had to take care of him in a sense of procuring to watch over his steps, where he was going or stop him before he could hurt himself. It was pretty ridiculous how sleepy his friend could be, but it didn't make him less adorable.

"Is he really awake?" Marco asked, looking at how somnolent [Name] looked. Was he really that tired before?

"Nope, but he'll manage."

[Name] stood from the bed, staggering a little. He took Jean's hand, but the other, nervous and embarrassed of the comment he would get from the others guys slapped his hand away. The amnesiac boy stared at him in confusion for the sudden rejection— strange. Jean, blushing, already began to walk to the dining hall to hide his blushed face.

Why did I do that?! Clenching his fist, Jean was clearly feeling embarrassed— he knew since before getting here this would be a problem. It seemed his pride was more important. "L-Let's go already!" [Name] tilted his head, yawning. He followed Jean, with Marco behind.

The freckled boy didn't understand what just happened at first, and stayed in silence. He took care of where [Name] was stepping on— the teenager almost went to sleep again while walking and almost hit himself with a wall. Can he sleepwalk...? Marco hoped he didn't.

When they got to the dinning hall it was pretty full, but they were just in time. Marco, seeing that [Name] looked still sleepy, told him to wait on a table while Jean and him returned with food. He happily agreed, instantly sitting on the nearest table, placed his arms on it and rested his head on them. Was he looking for the right time to sleep again?

"Is it normal that he sleeps so much?" Marco asked, taking two pieces of bread, two plates of soup and water.

"Don't know normal, but usually. I think the most he has slept was three days."

"W-What?!"

"Yep. Sometimes is impossible to wake him up— normally his mom would take care of this, but as he is here..." He sighs, "that won't be any good."

"Three days..." Was that even possible? Wasn't Jean exaggerating? "How normally has that happened?"

"I didn't really take track of it. But I noticed when he got bad headaches, and I mean bad, he fell asleep for some days."

"Headaches...?"

The time they were in line Jean explained [Name] state until they finished and returned to their table. The teenager still remained asleep, until Jean shook his shoulder to wake him up.

"Eat before it gets cold— it already is, somehow." He sit in front of [Name], and Marco besides him.

[Name] rested his chin on the palm of his hand, lazily taking bites to the bread. His eyes spotted his childhood friend Eren being surrounded by other people. He waved to Mikasa and Armin, receiving a wave and a serene smile from the ravenette and a grin from the blonde. It seemed Eren had already stated he was from Shiganshina, because [Name] could hear plenty of questions about how the titans looked like.

Jean was listening, and Marco, who grew more curious about it went to Eren's table to listen with the others.

It seemed a question hit a nerve. [Name] could only see Eren covering his mouth as if he wanted to vomit— after all, what happened to him was traumatic. He lost his mother, and who knows where his father was.

Jean's eyes shifted from Eren to [Name] respectively, noticing the worried expression his friend carried.

Just hearing the brunette speaking about joining the survey corps like [Name] made him more irritated than he already was. Nevertheless, he didn't let it show and preferred having some fun. "Wait a moment, are you crazy? Did you just say you want to join the Survey Corps?"

The brunette frowned at him, even more when he saw [Name] in the same table with him, "what about it? You are the one who wants to join the Military Police to take it easy, aren't you?"

[Name] just watched in silence, wondering what exactly Jean wanted to do.

Jean smirked, "What can I say? I'm honest. I prefer being that than try to act tough when in reality you are scared shitless." The comment seemed to annoy Eren, seeing him stand up with a glare directed at Jean. The taller teenager didn't seem bothered in the slightest— he stood up too and both teenagers approached each other. But whatever they wanted to do was interrupted by the sound of the bell, signalizing dinner time was over.

The taller male just smiled unbothered, "well, my bad. It wasn't trying to judge the way you think," he held his hand in a weak and fake attempt to release the tension, "let's let it go."

"Yeah... I guess I overreacted," It was clear to [Name] that Eren didn't accept the fake apology, seeing him just slapping Jean's hand. He seemed to leave, but before he did he looked at [Name] as if he wanted to say something, but in the end he didn't. Clenching his jaw, he averted [Name]'s prying gaze and left with a frown.

Would he be angry with me forever? [Name] stared at the table, upset. Mikasa and Armin weren't angry with him—and even if they told him Eren's anger wouldn't last that long he didn't fully believe them. Maybe he should speak to him... but how?

It seemed the time he had with Jean these two years had made him more sensitive about friendship, in some way. After all, he did felt some guilt about what happened. But what he could have done? He was just a kid.

"You okay?" Marco's gentle voice is heard, looking at his friend in worry.

"Yeah. I'm just... sleepy," he rubbed his eyes, "where's Jean?"

"Outside... I think someone's with him." He looked at the door, seeing Jean talking to a short guy.

[Name] didn't feel too lively now, and the only thing he thought about was laying in bed. He guessed he had to get up early in the morning tomorrow. Standing up, he took the last bite on his bread, not feeling hungry anymore. "I want to sleep already... I'm heading back."

"A-Ah, I'm going with you!"

Just as he wanted to leave, he bumped onto someone else, instantly hearing a shaky apology. [Name] blinked, lifting his gaze to meet someone incredibly taller than him.

It looked like the taller guy recognized him from somewhere, seeing his widening eyes.

[Name] knew those eyes.

"Ah— you are the one with pretty eyes from back then. And the one from when Shadis was yelling at us..." He spoke with his dull voice, not noticing some questioning gazes he got for the compliment. The brunette blushed, stuttering. "You are taller."

"You know him?" Marco asked, looking at both of them with prying eyes.

"Yes. We met in the refugee." He looks at him, "I never got your name."

"Uhm, B-Bertholt!" He seemed shy.

"Nice to meet you." He smiled, tilting his head.

"Bertholt! We—" A more deep voice came trough, but stopped when he saw company. It was a blonde and buffed guy— [Name] remembered him too. Seemed he did too, because his expression was the same as the brunette's, "Y-You are from back then!"

"There was someone else with you, wasn't it? Is she here too?"

"A-Ah, well, yes. She's around." The blonde smiles, "nice to see you again. I'm Reiner, by the way."

They both were going to the dormitory too, so Marco and [Name] stick with them. When they saw Jean outside they invited him to head back with them, but he had told them he was going to stay a little longer outside.

The four teenagers began to head back, and as expected, Reiner and Marco did the most of the talking, while Bertolt and [Name] quietly stayed in the back. The amnesiac boy looked carefully at the brunette, as if he was inspecting him. That only made Bertolt nervous.

He took Bertolt's hand, surprising the brunette. [Name] let out some hums and ah's, "you are huge. How did you get so tall...?" He compared his hand with the other's, looking at the difference while the brunette's face went red by the touch.

"U-Uhm, thanks...?" He said unsure— was that a compliment...?

"Tell me your secrets." Sparks appeared in [Name]'s eyes as he tightly hold Bertolt's hand. The brunette began to sweat, feeling shy and awkward by the touch.

"Uhm... Reiner..."

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Just as they got to their destination, [Name] wasted no time in throwing himself on the bed. Laying on his stomach, the pillow where he pressed his face on made his voice get muffled, "good night" he tried to say, ignoring any sort of conversation somebody wanted to have with him.

The three teenagers just saw him. He really was either lazy or just uninterested about everything.

"He sure likes to sleep a lot..." The freckled boy said, impressed. He knew it would be a pain to wake him up in the morning tomorrow.

The blonde laughed, "let's see who wakes up first— [Name] or Bertolt? Looks like you two have something in common." The comment received a grunt from his friend.

The three spoke a little bit before going to sleep, even when Jean got back. He wasn't surprised seeing his friend already asleep, and remembering he wasn't sharing bed with him made him grumpy before going to bed. Unluckily, his past thoughts about how handling [Name]'s touchy behavior made him pretty awake all night. Was it really a problem? Did he really pay attention of what others think about their relationship? Well, if they thought they were in one it was even better, wouldn't be? Even more if that jackass Jaeger knew about it. Just remembering the looks he gave them made him snicker. Unfortunately, that wouldn't matter if [Name] himself didn't feel anything romantically for him.

Fucking hell. Can this be more complicated?!

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Flower Curse | 4

[levi x male!reader x erwin] this work will have vomiting, heavy angst and death. the reader suffers from the hanakahi disease. summary: you loved him. he didn’t. everything goes downhill when suddenly, you cough a petal when you think of him.

t h r e e ___

Your health wasn't an excuse to not doing your job. Erwin wanted you to rest until there was a solution— but you weren't going to obey him. You didn't want to slack off and be the center of attention, you just wanted to stay off radar by everyone. Especially, by your illness' cause:

Levi.

Just thinking of him made you sick and warm— yes, you liked him a lot, loved him, even. But the other part of you made you repulsed of him. You thought the cause of that repulsion was the curse you had, but sometimes, you just wanted to stop loving him. Just to stop the suffering.

But that was impossible, wasn't it? You just can't change your feeling for someone in an instant. The only thing you could do was hide your feelings in the darkest place, with your flowers' company. Hide them from prying eyes, away from everyone. Just your emotions, the flowers and you.

Was this illness really going to kill you? After all you have been through? You didn't want to believe this at all— flowers were more deadly than a stupid titan! Unbelievable. How could it be? Flowers filling your lungs just for unrequited love? You had a hard time believing this ridiculous "curse". But, sadly, this was as real as the titans.

But then... how come nobody knew about this illness? Was this another thing the King hide? How could this be real?

A knock on the door snapped out of your thoughts. “Come in.” You said, rubbing your temple in exasperation.

A blonde picked shyly, then came in and saluted. “Squad Leader [Name], the Corporal is asking for your presence on today's training.”

“Fuck.” You instantly thought. You didn't remember today's task: help Levi with training. Was your luck better than yesterday? Or life was just laughing at you? You passed your hand on your hair, letting out a sigh. “Thanks, Arlert. We should be going or the grumpy old man is going to beat my ass.”

Armin didn't laugh at your comment— the blonde just nodded and smiled. The relationship with the cadets and you weren't that bad in your opinion. You enjoyed talking with the little kid about the outside world— something that was very forbidden to do. Arlert even had a book of the outside that shared with you, by your big surprise.

The kid was very clever; maybe as clever as Erwin. Something unnerving— could this young kid see the same thing Erwin couldn't not see? Could he see your sickness? You noticed your face paled this morning. You wished to whoever to put a blindfold to everyone around you.

Leaving your office with Armin at your side, you jokingly asked, “How is training today? Is the Corporal harsher than before?”

“The Corporal is being a little... harsh, yes. But I don't see much difference as in other training,” he placed finger on his chin, looking thoughtful, “But he seemed a little irritated that you weren’t there.”

“Of course he is going to be like that. I forgot I had to help him training.” You nervously stated. “What's today's training for?”

“We are training with our Vertical Maneuvering Equipment.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” What was worse? Close combat or the damn VME? Both options sounded horrible, but using your gear at your current state made you nervous. When your system wanted to throw the flowers this morning, it didn't gave you any warning like before. You just couldn't contain the urge of throwing it all out. Would the sudden force of the gear make you vomit?

You hoped Levi didn't want you to do use your gear today. You always showed your cadets how to use the gear properly, and when Levi wanted to explain something, you helped him showing the cadets your abilities. This wasn't looking good.

The blonde noticed your silent demeanor, thing that made him confused. “Is something wrong?”

Snapping out of your dark thoughts, you smiled as brightly as you could and looked at him, “There's nothing wrong! I just was thinking about how angry is Levi going to be, you've seen how he gets at the simplest things.”

The cadet looked at you, unsure, before nodding slowly.

You were sure Armin resembled Erwin for a second.

“About time you arrived, lazy shit.” You instantly heard the man of your dreams, —or maybe nightmares— when you arrived with Arlert at the training grounds.

Trying to playing it off, you said, “Hey! I'm not that late, just... thirty minutes late, not that bad.”

“Anyways, somehow you came just in time.” The raven stated before looking at Connie and Eren, the newest recruits. You didn't like what was he going to say, you knew it. “These two can't go faster with their gear, and it seems hearing what i'm saying is too hard for them,” he said irritably, looking at the two nervous cadets, then looked at you with his usual frown, “and I expect you to show it.”

Damn it, damn it, damn it! If you refused, he would ask questions, and the answers would not satisfy him at all— you barely got out of the previous situation thanks for Erwin being there, but now he wasn't. Be an adult and resolve your problems.

This wouldn't be that bad, right? You just had to do some harsh movement. You previous thoughts were you being ridiculous; nothing will happen. Everything will be alright, no need to worry. Everything will be okay. Stop overreacting, nothing will happen.

Armin noticed your discomfort, and before he could said something, Levi looked at him and harshly ordered, “You are still here, Arlert? Go back in training.” The blonde got taken aback looking at his scared face, and ran off with a "yes sir!".

Trying to sound normal and collected, you replied, “Sure thing, what do I need to do?”

“Alright, listen closely you two,” you said, looking at Springer and Jaeger, “For this to work you have to work with your whole body, something that I noticed you don't do in your training today.”

“But I moved more than before and I still can't do it! It's impossible to go faster than that!” Connie exclaimed frustrated, “I don't even know how Jean is going faster than me!”

“That horseface actually go faster than me too, that stupid horse...” Eren mumbled. You just let out a laugh, and tried to act serious— Levi was watching you three from afar. Looking specially at you, though,

“Don't say 'I can't do it' because you certainly can,” you looked at Connie, “Listen, Springer. The Corporal is the fastest of us, you know why?” the cadet shacked his head, taking interest, “It's because of his height. He is very short- just like you. I even can say that you could match his speed at some point.” You tried to raise his spirit, thing that succeeded, by the looks of his joyful face.

Now, looking at Eren, you said, “Jaeger, you have to work with your movement. Just think when you are in air as you... are dancing.” By the looks of his expression, he really didn't fully understand your statement, because his confused frown. “Now, now, don't give me that look. It sounds ridiculous, but it does the job. Just imagine the people dancing at the festivals— they are in sync. You have to be in sync with you gear, just like a dance.” To make them fully understand you had to show them, something you wanted to avoid but it seemed impossible.

“Alright, let me show you. You have to see closely, understand?” They nodded, looking excited. Gulping, you looked ahead into the forest. Ignoring the voice in your head stopping you to do this, you prepared yourself and nailed your hook at the nearest tree, and then, you flied.

At first, it didn't feel that uncomfortable. Your mission here was to not be that harsh with your movements, but showing the speed to the cadets was the point of this, so avoiding any movement seemed impossible.

“Now I have to turn...” You reluctantly thought. Your grip tightened and in the second your hooks nailed in the trees, at first you prepared for the worst, but when nothing came you relaxed and even smiled. Even taking a look on the two cadets made you relaxed; they were in awe and the corporal just looked pleased.

“See? Nothing to be wo-”

And then, you felt it.

Your thoughts got interrupted thanks to the familiar sensation on your throat. The feeling made you alerted and disorientated, making you lose your grip on the blades and unhooking them off the tree. The falling wasn't that flawless, looking at how high you were.

You fell on some bushes, making your fall at least not that bad. When you hit the ground you instantly threw up white flowers, ignoring any pain you felt at the moment.

Full little flowers. At first sight, they were beautiful, but not for you anymore.

You practically forced yourself to stop vomiting, and held any flowers from coming out. Knowing the others will come to see if you were alright, at least you had to bear with all the pain until you could get out of there. Trying your best to cover the petals with the bushes, you tried to stand but failed to do so.

“Squad Leader [Name]! Are you alright?!” you heard both Connie and Eren calling for you, and less than a minute they were with you, helping you to stand. Gulping all petals who wanted to come out, you tried your best to just smile.

“Phew! That was a nasty fall. Sorry you had to see that, and i'm the example here, haha...” dusting off your clothes made wince in pain, thing you tried to hide by just laughing. The pair of cadets just kept talking and trying to not worry you that much. They both eventually stopped talking when a certain corporal appeared, with an expression you know very well— he was trying to know what happened, read the situation.

“Cadets, both of you will look for Petra and tell her she's on training duty.” Hearing his orders, both of them saluted and left. He looked at your poor act of getting it together, and asked angrily, “What the hell happened?”

Come on, [Name]! Keep it together!

“My hooks didn't sunk in the tree, simple as that.” Scratching your head, you proceed, “Actually, maybe the hand-grip isn't that-”

“Stop talking shit.”

You gulped. “Uh? What are you talking about? I said my hooks—”

“Quit lying to me.” Levi approached you, taking your arm roughly, making you gasp in pain. Actually, your senses awoken again— now fully feeling the pain in your arm, leg and ribs. “You know I hate lies. More if they come out of your mouth.”

You didn't say a word at all. You didn't dare to make the situation worse.

“Can you walk?”

Leaving his grip on your arm, you tried to take a few steps; you could walk, but you were limping with your right leg. And every time you took a step, a sharp pain was felt in your knee. Levi sighed in irritation, and helped you walk by taking your arm on his shoulder and placing his hand on your waist.

“What a pathetic attempt.”

The closeness made you sick, and the flowers wanted to be released.

“We'll go to the infirmary, then.”

Your ribs didn't break, thankfully. You just had some colorful bruises covering your right leg, left arm and waist. It wasn't that bad, not as bad as the flowers, at least.

After getting parched up, you both went to Levi's office, just to do some "relaxing" paperwork you both had to do. You always went to his office to make him company, something he didn't mind. You had to play it safe— if you avoided him, he would ask questions, and when he asks he wants real answers. Things you couldn't give.

Somehow, your little talk made you forget about all of the feelings and thoughts you were having. There was just the two of you, like it always has been. You forget about the flowers, and they seemed to forget about you just for a moment.

“You have something on your hair.” you heard the raven say, seeing his hand coming closer to you, taking off a leave. “And there's something on your face, too. Disgusting...” Even when he said that, his fingers touched your cheek, cleaning it off, before cleaning his own fingers with a napkin.

The event made you slightly blush —at least you hoped—, and thank him.

“A-Anyways, did Petra said anything about Eren and Connie?” you asked, remembering the little talk both of them had an hour ago, when you were in the infirmary getting check on.

“They did better,” he replied, writing on his papers. “They wanted to know badly how you were, though.”

“Aw! They care about me!” you exclaimed with a big smile. Even if you wanted to play it off, the feeling of the kids caring about you warmed your heart. “How adorable!” The feeling just made you blush.

Your words made the Corporal look at you with a questioning gaze. “What? Do you think they are the only ones caring about you?” Levi asked, stopping his work. “How disappointing.”

Laughing, you talked, “What am I hearing? Does Levi care about me more than the cadets?”

“What if I do?”

Your grip on the pen tightened; your heartbeat went crazy; your blush covering your cheeks went deeper, covering your ears. Words seemed disappear of your vocabulary— you didn't understand how some words could steal your breath like that. But it was because it's him. The one you like the most. Time seemed to stop.

It seemed that the sight of you made him smirk in pleasure. He come closer to your face, looking directly at your eyes. “I asked something. What If I care more than them?”

[Name]! Remain your composure! “W-Well, uhm...” clearing your throat, you proceed, “Then you care about me. That's... all...”

“Why you always forget?”

“Forget? Forget what?”

“About how I can't stand your lies.”

“Lies?! Ahem! What do you want me to say? It's nice that you care about me.” You stopped thinking about what you were saying, so you just let whatever thing came out of your mouth. Uh-oh. Good or bad thing? “I care about you too, anyways.”

He arched his eye brown,“Is that so?”, he slightly smiled, by your surprise. “More than the cadets do, I assume?”

“Of course. We've know each other since you came here, right? Actually, I think I'm the first one who didn't fall for your scary face, along with Hange.”

“Ah, how could I forget how irritating you were,” closing his eyes, he proceed, “even when I knocked you out, you kept being a childish little shit, always returning.”

“Hey! But you love this little shit, don't you?” Laughing, you returned to your work, uncaring of the answer.

“I'm glad you stayed.”

You froze. Levi wasn't the time of saying this like this to you; there were always harsh words in a playful nature. But nothing like this before. Nevertheless, him saying that made a smile on your face.

“I'm glad too.”

After that, a pleasant silence fell. The only sound the both of you heard was the pens writing on your papers and the sound outside. You didn't notice the sky turning dark, until an ocasional glance to the window made you exclaimed, “It's dinner time!”

The Corporal looked at the dinner and let out a hum, you only proceed to stand up from your seat and stretch. “Let's go, Levi. We forgot to do tea, so let's hurry up!”

“Go first, I will join soon.” He replied.

“Alright, then. Will make tea when I get there.” Nodding your head, you didn't bothered to bring you papers with him; it was normal for you to leave them arranged on a part of his desk. He always said "take your shit with you", but you always laughed it off. Strange, because this time, he didn't say anything. You left, but your thoughts made you slow your walk.

You noticed Levi was being more... open to you. Could that be a sign? Maybe? And now that you remember it, flowers weren't trying to get out of your throat. You even forgot about the illness, about the pain, about your future... You felt... nice, warm. Just like before the curse.

Could it be that... you had a future with him? The sudden thought made you blush and smile in embarrassment. Was he, maybe, in love with you? The conversation repeated on your head - and your mind kept re rolling the exact same phrase.

“I'm glad you stayed.”

“What if I care more than them?”

You stopped walking, and come to the realization that you actually wanted to make a move. Nothing could go wrong! The conversation of today made you believe that something could happen between the two of you! A bright smile made through your face thinking this— there was hope after all!

There was not time to waste, then! Your mind was made up— you were confessing right now. No one could interrupt you now; everyone had to be getting dinner, so the two of you couldn't be bothered. You nodded to yourself, and went back to Levi's office.

You couldn't believe it - this was all like a dream to you. You actually were going to have a future! You were going to be cured; everything was going to be alright from now on.

Noticing his door slightly opened, you scolded yourself for not paying attention to close it properly before leaving. Hey! That's not important right now! Shaking your head, you couldn't wait to open it and tell Levi your true feelings. Oh! You couldn't wait to tell Erwin and Hange about—

...

.

.

.

.

.

Ah. How could you forget? So foolish.

The sight in front of you made you petrify.

What was that you were feeling...? Surprise? Fear? Or was it... Heartbreak? How could you point the exact time your heart shattered, and the flowers bloomed once more in your heart? The realization fell like a ton of bricks. You never meant to be loved by him, it was for her. It never was for a person like you. Not you. Never, ever, for you. How could you forget? How? You were in denial.

The sudden realization made you snap out from your illusion.

NEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOU.

You are a fool.

You really thought he loved you?

What a pitiful sight.

Go and cry, there's no saving you.

Thoughts invaded your mind like a parasite — repeating themselves with not a chance to be stopped.

And what was the sight that made you so unstable? Well, maybe you know it already.

Two people were embracing each other, with the moonlight above them, looking beautiful as a couple. Who were this two, you ask?

Levi, and Petra, obviously.

The petals were awoken once more, and with such a bestial force you never felt before.

Covering your mouth with your hand, you couldn't stop some petals to escape and lay on the floor, by your ignorance. You just ran out of there, and went to the only place your unstable mind wanted you to be.

Erwin arranged his paperwork again for maybe, the sixth time this night. There were never ending letters to respond, check once more the strategies for the upcoming expedition, and more, more letters.

“Seems like a sleepless night, again.” He thought, rubbing his temples.

Little did he know his lack of sleep wouldn't be only the papers.

The sudden noise of someone opening his door made him annoyed— and before he could scold the responsible person, he stopped himself as he saw you kneeling on the floor, vomiting white petals— no, flowers.

Without thinking he went to your side and rubbed your back in a gently manner. He remained calm, but something his sight caught made him horrified.

White flowers were decorated in red.

Outside, he remained clam, but in the inside he was more than worried; if vomiting flowers was a bad sign, vomiting blood with them was far worse.

You eventually stopped; you only could gasp, trying to breath. Your nostrils were leaked water, your lips had blood and saliva, and the only comforting thing that made you sane was Erwin beside you.

“I'm going to die, Erwin,” you could only say, with desperation in your voice. “I'm going to die, I'm going to die, I'm going to die...”

Erwin tried his best to hush you, “That's not true. We are going to fix this, there's a solution...” and he continued and continued, trying to calm your sobs and pleas. Hearing you like this, so broken, desperate, made something inside him ache. He only embraced you, holding you. You only wanted someone close to you, someone to hold you.

He had to move things fast, and find a way to fix you before it was too late.

“Let's go, then!” a certain blushing girl said, smiling brightly. The raven only nodded with a soft gaze, walking beside her, until something on the floor took his attention.

“Flowers?” Levi thought, looking at the white petals on the floor. Kneeling, he took some and look at them quietly. Beautiful at first sight, hiding the true meaning they had.

“Aren't you coming, Corporal?” Petra said, turned at him.

Levi hummed, covering the little flower on his front pocket, and returned walking, “[Name] is waiting.”

Cyclamen. Cyclamens are symbolic of resignation. It’s the flower that means goodbye too.

Because it is poisonous, death is also attached to its meaning. It also presents the fact that good things come to an end and so it’s also the type of flower you might want to make use of at funerals – because it speaks of departure aside from moving away and retiring.

f i v e

when will you update your books in wp?

Once I finish a chapter, I immediately update my books on all sites!! Unfortunately, I’m unsure when will that happen..... _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

N0IRRRR COMING IN CLITCH WHEN NO ONE IS UPDATING 💖💗💓💞💝💕❣️💗❤️💞💗💕💘💞💝💗

LETS GOOOOOOOOO

Child of the sun, come back

[ascended!astarion x gn!spawn!reader]

You had colorful memories, once: vivid flower fields, triumph smiles, faces that gave you comfort. But now, images of curtains with the sun behind blurred your mind, leaving darkness where color had been, once.

1122words / one shot / angst

note: after years of not writing anything, baldurs gate has inspired me to write just a little bit. ascended astarion has some good angst around him and i love it

There were days spent in the hollow main room, where the curtains protected your being from becoming dust. A lonely chair in front of the window, where just a peek welcomed a ray of the sun to meet the cold room. You just admired it quietly, desiring it to meet your flesh once more; to take you back to who you once were.

Astarion had said something once. He had stayed, observing silently, as if you were going to open the curtains and kiss the sun, leaving to another limbo. You knew it wasn't because he was scared, but everytime you came here, he appeared. Standing near the door where the darkness was, as if he were hiding from the rays of sunlight. He had yearned for them, once. Perhaps its familiarity had bored him.

But then, that company left, and the sun stayed.

“I don't know what's inside that head of yours, darling.”

He could know, but he chose not to.

Quietly watching as you hug your legs, your gaze peeking behind your knees. A ray almost looking magical, sacred. A plea to be touched.

Come back to me, child of the sun.

Child of the sun… you were, once. Someone had called you that, once. Who? You wondered—always did.

Sometimes you caught yourself forgetting memories; where once there were faces with prideful smiles, now rest the images of curtains, and that face, almost proudly, looking back at you with a high face.

Then, you hear it: a melody. Maybe inside your head, but it has been a long time since satisfying music passed through your ears. Closing your eyes, your head moves slightly with the rhythm. This palace had always been silent.

You stood up. Your legs moved by themselves—a curious thing, feeling as if something controlled you. Your hands dance delicately. This time, is enjoyable.

Someone taught you how to dance, once. A warm hand guided your clumsy steps to a magnificent piece. Warm compliments to keep you going. You had fun—you remembered that.

You danced, once. With who?

“You are dancing.”

You stopped, paying full attention to him. The room seemed darker.

“I was.”

Astarion just stared. Observing was one of his favorite pastimes all this eternity. Arms behind him, trying to interpret your curious actions. But then, he holds his hand for you to take.

“Dance with me.” This time it doesn't feel like a command—a request, perhaps. Either way, it required your obedience.

You accepted it, and in an instant, he had a grip on you—his left arm around your waist, his right hand taking your hand higher. A close proximity you expected. This Astarion loved touch—to be close. Weirdly, this grip was soft.

And then, he moved. You are confused by the dance—what was his intention? Slower? Faster? Your clumsiness appeared once more by almost falling, but the vampire’s hands kept you in place. The soft chuckle from Astarion fills your ears, and you feel something you hadn't felt lately—embarrassment.

When was the last time you felt anything, anyway?

“Why the rush, my dear? We just began.” He guided you. Back perfectly still, shoulders impeccably aligned, head high, with eyes staring back at you with a gentleness you didn't recognize. His true intentions were unknown to you. When those scarlet eyes held such tenderness just for you in this present, you didn't know if they were real, or if the meaning behind them was something completely different.

Either way, this mystery game tired you and holds no meaning anymore. Resting your head on his chest, the melody that once was, dissolved, leaving you in a cold silence. The curtains blocked the sun, and the rays of light weren’t as strong as before. Were they afraid, of the dark in the room?

“I was a child of the sun, once.” You muttered more to yourself than to him.

“You were, once.” A different grip—tighter, afraid to let go; or, maybe, caging you to not break the connection. But was it a connection when one line was severed? When the other side was unresponsive?

There was no answer when his response was final. A tone that you use with a child when they should not question further. You are happy without divulging. Ignorance is a bliss. Stay with me. Why do you even think of leaving?

“This is what you wanted—to stay with me.” He reassured, whispering over your ear as he pressed your bodies together.

“Of course I did.” An instant answer. To you, it is a justification for your predicament. To him, it is a decision you made for love. A meaning that both sides had something in common: to stay beside each other for eternity, even if the concept of love was morphed according to whom the person is.

Then, he stopped, and so did you. Opening your eyes, you looked at him, only to see unusual fragility in that crimson. The dance already forgotten; his hand moved to grip your jaw, leaving a gentle kiss. Your eyes flickered to the hidden windows—slightly opened, letting the curtains dance, too.

Strange tenderness. There’s nothing.

He broke the one-sided connection. Crimson eyes wandered your face. “Your meal is soon. I advise you to get ready, my love.” He doesn't leave. He needs an answer.

“Of course.” The response satisfied him, as he freed your jaw from his grip. He takes backwards steps with his arms on his back, observing again. You took the chance to study him, too—exactly the same as you can remember. Curled soft hair, as white as snow; stance looking proudly, But that face…

“I’ll wait for you.”

“Yes.”

Unfortunately, such embrace almost meant nothing. A chore, perhaps; or maybe, a burden only a puppet can keep on doing. The cruelty of it all left hollowness, and even the memories had left you.

The rays of light seemed to exist again once his presence was gone. There's warmth once the sun remembers you, calling what was before your name. To come back to them.

You had a name, back then. Your friends called your name, once. They didn’t erase it. They didn’t call you things you weren't.

The memories belong to the curtains. What you once were, belongs to them now.

You had a reflection. You had warmth. You had mortality. You had the sun. You had him. You had—

You opened the curtain.

The window had no reflection for you.

But it had such a loving embrace you didn’t have in many years.

You came back to me, child of the sun.

—masterlist

༺♰༻ATTACK ON TITAN  📎 Flower Curse | [Levi x Male!Reader x Erwin] | COMPLETED SUMMARY: You loved him. He didn’t. Everything goes downhill when suddenly, you cough a petal when you think of him. ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE | SIX | SEVEN | EPILOGUE | ??? | ENDING A | ENDING B | ENDING C 📎 e m p t y | [Various x Male!Amnesiac!Reader] | ON GOING SUMMARY: [Name], an amnesiac boy awakes in an unknown place. Trying to remember anything makes him have horrible headaches. Who is he? And why he can’t remember his own face? ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE | SIX | SEVEN | EIGHT | NINE | TEN | ELEVEN | TWELVE | THIRTEEN | FOURTEEN 📎 Reiss Mental Asylum | [Yandere!Various x Male!Prettyboy!Reader] | ON GOING SUMMARY: Finally! You have been given an opportunity to work at Reiss Mental Asylum- your job hunting hasn’t been great, so to hear you got an opportunity made you excited. At the beginning everything seems normal- but without noticing, some people began to get obsessed with you. ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE | SIX | SEVEN | EIGHT | NINE | TEN | ELEVEN | TWELVE 

ＳＰＥＣＩＡＬ♡ＶＡＬＥＮＴＩＮＥ

📎 Save us All [GenderNeutral!TimeTraveler!Reader] | No pairings SUMMARY: Every time you see them die. You promised someday, you will save them all.

📎 Forever with you [Reiner x Male!Reader] SUMMARY: When your soulmate cries, your eyes began to water. Unexpectedly so; you have seen cases where one of your friends randomly cries when both of you are talking. It worries you at first, but rapidly they explain is ‘their soulmate crying’.

i've been trying to think why i stopped writing entirely, so this is just a vent/ramble post and doesn't mean anything beyond that? line break bc i dont think someone would want to read rambling tb: rant about aot, info about reiss mental asylum/empty/future

the first reasons i came out with were 1. work 2. a shitty situation that worsened my already shitty mental health and 3. void of creativity/writers block/no energy to think or to came out with something i liked bc i kept comparing myself to others creators (which is... very bad).

the other big reason....... (since i only wrote for aot):

i think i stopped writing anything attack on titan related because i really, really got so salty that my favorite peace of media (that i've followed for 11 years) ended they way it did? and i don't mean that 'oh just bc u didn't get a happy ending or u didn't understand the characters and the plot doesn't mean your opinion is valid bla bla'

but the way characters' developments were poorly handled and recessed, how they were just made dumber for the sake of the plot and how suddenly a romantic relationship that wasn't there in the first place became something bigger at the end and how eren was handled in the last moments just made me so salty lmao.

and it makes me more salty how people just shits on you if you don't like it and quickly go with their 'u didn't get it' like brother ive been here since 2013 tf you mean? now we can't criticize anything and still like something??? AAAGGGHHHH

im sorry LOL it's just that i can't see anything aot related bc it is so ruined for me. literally i see tiktoks and i get so sad and bitter bc i know what the comments will be lmao i hate it, literally just read the manga and stopped watching the anime until season 3 bc i just disliked how everything was handled so bad. like any news about it just doesn't make me feel anything 😭 i need a therapist

anyway :) im trying to find my love towards it again because i genuinely liked writing my shitty stories about it and the world building and characters were what i fell in love with.

(also, this doesn't mean im bashing ppl who liked the ending!! in my eyes, everything is subjective—some like it, some dont, and that's fine. how boring life would be if we all thought the same?)

but i AM bashing those who say 'you didn't get it'. come here and get this hands how about that

oh, and im rewriting reiss mental asylum (just the earlier chapters bc they are... bad y'all LOL), nothing too heavy, just trying to improve the writing and adding extra things. (such as the damn time period... i've had in mind to settle it around 1960-1980, but i just didn't pay attention to the world building enough to explicitly mention it. oh well, the more you know.)

i've already made a big chunk of info about how i want to develop the whole story, so i do have a clear structure to follow. also, i once begged for ideas in ao3, and many people came with great input, and a commentor was so spot on on what i was intending to do with the story! (like really spot on LOL they found my secret plot twist...)

it really makes me baffled how many people like the story, with its flaws and all. i was young and very inexperienced when writing it, so i hope i can refine it enough to make it a decent read for all of you.

also... people from russia 🫵 im speaking to you directly... thank you for your kind messages as well! (some of you have reached for me through email) it just baffles me how well liked that story is? and for the translator(Вероника_69) to still keeping an eye after years of no updating? aaaa. thank you.

i think i needed to write this vent, it helped me to get some good motivation!!

aaaaand i've watched jujutsu kaisen... you may see silly things coming up as well... err, someday. because college is around the corner again and that means suffering! and poor mental health! and no time! and no life!

been having these intrusive thoughts lately of... erasing all of my works LOL BUT i won't, don't worry. they'll be there as a reminder of how slightly ive improved (not much).

but yeah, if you see me experiment with small drabbles or just silly posts it doesn't mean im not paying attention to reiss mental asylum! i won't abandon it unless i die, even then i've told my friends to release my 30 unfinished drafts for you to get some closure LOL (fr though). but yeah, i will gravitate towards other fandoms if i feel like it (:

so, empty: hiatus... hiatus hiatus bc i hate to touch aot right now as its canon universe. indefinite hiatus, but i love that story to just abandon it. i was having much fun with it, tbh. which also im very grateful that it also got a russian translation by _Полуночник_! sorry that these news aren't very positive for the fans of empty, but i promise i'll get around it someday.

anyway, this turned out too long. thank you for still checking my stories, as bad as they are! i really, really appreciate you all reaching out to me. hopefully this year i can be more active, even if to write drabbles with meaning behind it. (i just love stories with lores thats why im so damn slow) although... i wrote more for myself in the beginning, so i was very surprised that people wanted more LOL

oh and im going to post masterlists to order my shit better. i want pretty visuals too, yk? headsup if u see me posting... also, feel free to ask anything about this vent lol i dont mind. (also i always got notifications to my email when someone asked something, and idk when they stopped? also, yeah, i check my email 😞)

hope you are having a good start of year. and, if not, well, we have 11 months anyways

and i never fucking realize i had 550 FOLLOWERS. i am not fit for social media y'all im sorry. i'll have to spoil you with something... THANK YOU FOR FOLLOWING A DAMN GRAVEYARD 😭 i will make it better i promise

also... dont use chat bots... my brain rotted... 😞 i had an unhealthy obsession (still do) but don't give in LMAO

Reiss Mental Asylum / １１

【 shingeki no kyojin / mental asylum – alternative universe, modern setting 】 『male!yandere!various x male!prettyboy!reader』 summary: Finally! You have been given an opportunity to work at Reiss Mental Asylum- your job hunting hasn’t been great, so to hear you got an opportunity made you excited. At the beginning everything seems normal- but without noticing, some people began to get obsessed with you. warnings/tags: DARK/HEAVY THEMES. Non-consensual themes; sexual assault, touching, drug use, rape attempt. Home invasion, yanderes, obsessive behavior, murder, blood, explicit content, sexual thoughts. masterlist

11. dangerous

“Wouldn’t it be weird? I mean— being watched is awkward enough…” The assistant frowned, unsure about the task. 

“We’ll have our table not that far away from them.” Mike knew [Name] would be really persistent with these subjects— he was too positive, too kind. That could develop a bigger problem in the future if they allowed it, and the taller man could already smell the trouble ahead.

He had to protect him before something happened.

“But still… wouldn’t be better to socialize?”

“That would be problematic. You know how that could end, [Name].”

“Well—” He tried to object, but remembering all of the closeness he got with some of them came to his mind, shutting his hopes out. “I guess…” He wanted to rehabilitate them, help them reintegrate to society. Wasn’t this the point of their job here? The assistant let out a defeated sigh at these thoughts.

“Hey,” Mike gently ruffled his hair to take his attention and comfort him, showing a small smile, “small steps.” [Name] blinked and relaxed his shoulders, nodding with his head and smiled. That was true— he can't just solve everything in a few weeks! After all, the sessions with the patients were just starting. There was plenty of time ahead!

The cafeteria was the next place they had to be— it was pretty simple, just watch and observe the patients. If they were lucky, no need to sedate them would be needed, if they behaved. Only the patients with good behavior lately were allowed in the cafeteria, but that didn't mean one of them couldn’t control themselves and cause an scene. Mike told him not to worry too much— the blond explained he could smell patients’ changes. [Name] just blinked at that statement.

The doors were already open wide. Plenty of patients were chatting, others didn’t. The table where doctors were was noticeable— their white coats and clipboards gave it away, along with the harsh gaze they wore. The two headed that way, not before [Name] saying a cheerful ‘good morning!’ to the patients he passed, receiving some weird looks from them, but with his’ patients they almost got hearts in their eyes (only Armin and Bertholdt, tho). The others smirked, eyeing him from head to toe.

Most of his patients were already there. After all, the bell had already been heard and lateness wasn't allowed. (Un)fortunately, one certain patient was missing— Eren Jaeger. Mike had explained the little ruckus he had done had cost him his permission to go into the cafeteria for the mean time. [Name] didn’t know if to feel relief or not.

By [Name] surprise, Vincent was there too— but not at the doctors’ table. He was standing in a corner along with other guards. They met eyes, and [Name]’s cheeks blushed a little. He smiled and waved, receiving a handsome grin and a wink from the guard.

As expected, everyone saw the small interaction— some with frowns on their faces. Specially Armin, Bertholdt and Connie. The three narrowed eyes at the guard, suspicious by the evident flirting.

“[Name]!!! Here!!!” A joyful familiar voice could be heard. [Name] turned to see Hanji waving her hand enthusiastically with a big grin on her face. She was at the doctors’ table too, and as the assistant could see, some doctors just looked at her in irritation and others tried to ignore her.

[Name] chuckled a little, sitting down along with Mike. Zeke and Levi were there too, with their usual frowns. For some reason the short man appeared angrier than usual. The assistant greeted everyone, waving shyly.

  And at the other table...

“Ah?! Did you see that guard just now?” Connie irritably spoke, frowning at the guard as he gritted his teeth.

The small blond’s eyes were locked on the stoic guard— his lifeless blue eyes observed every bit of him, as if he wanted him dead.

Bertholdt looked angry. He recognized who he was— the memory made him clench his jaw tightly.

Jean grinned, seeing the upset reactions of some. “Seems pretty boy has some competition behind.”

“Even you, Bert? Unbelievable,” Reiner interjected, crossing his arms. He smirked, “but I can’t deny he has a nice ass.” His compliment gained a laugh from Jean and some glares from the other three.

“Reiner!” Bertholdt exclaimed, frowning at his friend. The blond just grinned devilish.

“What? It’s the truth.”

The smaller blond grunts, “anyways, why isn’t Eren here?” He tried to look for his friend, but he couldn't find him anywhere. Usually he would stay with him.

“You don’t know, Armin?” The blond boy shakes his head, curious and confused, “I heard from other guards he was into a fight with [Name].” Jean answers nonchalantly, glancing at the assistant, who was chatting with the doctors.

“Uh?!” Not only just Armin reacted, but everyone on the table did. Reiner looked at Jean with interest in the situation, as he saw Bertholdt, Connie and Armin widening their eyes by such statement, changing their focus on Jean again.

“Yup. I heard he went physical,” Jean crosses his arms, deep in thought. “So that’s why [Name] acted nervous when hearing his name the other day...”

The small blond’s eyes widened in shock— Eren knew he loves [Name]. Armin have made that clear long before his friend had met the assistant. So why did he do something so stupid? Just the thought of him putting his hands on [Name] angered him— so the unusual mark he noticed was a bruise. A mark on his precious [Name]. A painful mark. What was Eren thinking? How could he?

Connie looked irritated and annoyed, to say at least. The assistant had made him interested in someone in a long time, if ever. Hearing that Eren was going nuts over this delicate man only made him think of him moving institutions or just Eren breaking him in the end like the others. If [Name] disappeared, then who will hear his greatness? The toy should get take care of if he didn't want that outcome.

Bertolt felt furious. His beautiful [Name], attacked by a beast like him? No way— he wouldn’t allow that happening again. How could he dare do that? And for what reason? Angel wasn’t someone evil like the others once were— he was gentle, kind and smelled nice. If something happened to him, Bertolt couldn’t know how would he react. That won’t happen!

"I guess we won't see him for some time. Maybe a week,” Jean crosses his arms, “if he’s lucky he doesn’t have to go to that place.”

“Who knows, seeing how kitten has some people around his finger...” The buff blonde spoke, eyeing the doctor's table. At first glance it wasn't noticeable, but he could see how intently were some workers watching him. So this was the game everyone was playing: alright, Reiner could play it too. He was lucky enough to get the pretty assistant on his sessions— just thinking of having him under him turned him on. He chuckled darkly, wondering. 

Jean eyed everyone in secret, taking note of their expressions. Holding his laughter, Jean could only think how unlucky [Name] was for being in this disgusting place and attracting their attention. A deep part of his mind told him he wouldn’t last much being involved with these people. It would be really a shame to kill someone as cute as him— if that happened, he had to benefit himself before.

“We’ll see.”

  Vincent could only guess what was happening in that table— seeing their sinister smiles as their gazes were locked onto the doctor's table worried him.

back at the doctors' table...

“Anyways, did you had fun in your date?” Levi bitterly asked, narrowing his eye as he drank his tea. The two particular men instantly froze, looking confusedly at the ravenette by hearing such... ridiculous thing. [Name]? Dating? Who? Why?

At the mention of it, [Name] blushed a little, smiling. “Y–You shouldn’t say it out loud...”

"Woaaah! [Name] had a date?!" Hanji grinned, watching carefully the scene before her. “Look at this big boy!”

“Date? With who?” Zeke forcefully asked, holding his anger and jealously. His grip on his cup tightened as he tried to play it off, but obviously with irritation showing.

Mike just observed in silence, not that pleased of the new information.

“U—Uhm, well...” he played with his fingers, “with Vincent...”

Zeke’s eye twitched. “Who is Vincent?”

“H—He’s a guard!”

“The one you waved at earlier?” Mike asked, receiving a nod. 

Now it was turn to the three workers to glare at the poor guard, who did feel the amount of glares he was given just in a few minutes. Vincent gulped, his left eye twitching slightly. His partner, who was not that far away, raised an eyebrow in amusement by the situation he was in. I told you, dumbass.

Zeke narrowed his eyes, tapping his cup with his finger impatiently, "you know romantic relationships with workers is against the norms, do you?"

Pretty hypocritical, wasn't it?

"I mean, it wasn't as a lovers date! W-We are just friends, hehe!" [Name] tried to reason, shaking his head hastily.

“And what about your neighbor?” Levi spoke, trying to sound as casual as he could. In reality, something inside him turned and shifted uncomfortably.

NEIGHBOR?!

Zeke wasn’t happy by what he was hearing. Really? Two filthy men he didn’t know? Now not only he had to take care of the damn people working inside this shithole, but he had to somehow know about [Name] private life? Just how many people were trying to get their filthy hands on him?

“He cancelled! He said his job was going to take all of his free time for some time. Also, he could go to a business trip next week. It’s a shame... I was looking forward to it.” [Name] frowned. I wasn’t the only reason he was upset— he felt secure when Porco was in his apartment. The [hair color] haired didn’t like being lonely at all in the night, and when his neighbor went into business trips his sleeping schedule wasn’t right. He could get easily scared sometimes, specially before going to sleep. There were times were Porco called him in the night, trying to not let him feel that alone. [Name] asked him to keep talking until he fall asleep— such a  childish behavior, but in the end his neighbor complied.

“Ha! Seems our [Name] here is a heart taker!” Hanji exclaims, grabbing [Name]’s cheeks hard, making the assistant yelp. “Such a cutie!!! Who can resist him?! Look at him!!”

Rubbing his temples, Zeke sighs in exasperation. “Hanji, can you please leave my assistant before you tear his pretty face apart?” The comment made Levi raise an eyebrow, while [Name] blushed. Mike stayed in silence, his expression not showing any emotion.

Letting go of [Name]’s face, Hanji clapped her hands and grinned. “So! Finally we are all together so I can tell you about my dears!” Everyone sighed as they heard Hanji begin to talk about her patients, a topic nobody wanted to hear. All of the people present knew about her stories about them, and this woman could keep going on and on until their shift was over.

Before they could prevent it, [Name] asked who they were— big mistake. It was Hanji's opportunity to take this poor soul into her dark and twisted stories about their 'experiments'. [Name] didn't like that term at all— he wondered if the woman really saw them as objects, but hearing her calling them 'babies' and 'dearies' troubled him. Is she... okay?

The small talk turned out to be a much extended one that wasn't even finished when lunch time ended. [Name] thanked she wasn't her assistant, or thanked Zeke wasn't the mad scientist persona.

"Unfortunately I won't be with you today, [Name]. I have some other things to take care of, but don't take my absence like an opportunity to do whatever you want and get into trouble."

"O-Of course not, Zeke! I won’t get into any trouble!!”

The doctor stood up from his seat, ruffling his assistant's hair without care. "Good, because there's punishment."

[Name] just saw the doctor leave with some colleagues, including Hanji and Mike. Both of them waved at [Name] and Levi one last time.

Levi just watched quietly, drinking his tea. He wasn’t in a hurry— there wasn’t anything he had to do in the next hour, and opted to calmly drink. His silver eyes shifted from his tea to [Name], who’s eyes wandered trough the leaving patients. Unfortunately for him, Levi did notice how his [eye color] eyes stop somewhere before smiling and blushing.

The ravenette could only guess who was the source of such happiness— Vincent Genett. The guard he never took attention on. Levi wasn’t a dick to everyone— he treated everyone equally, until they got in his nerves. And in this case, Levi was justified for hating this guy’s guts. Not that he needed justification anyways— who was Vincent? He only remembered seeing him around from time to time since what, one-two years? Pretty surprising, knowing what fate guards had in their horrible job. This Vincent had some luck if he persisted this long. Hopefully, that luck would run out sooner or later.

[Name]’s attention shifts on Levi, who is watching him with a cold stare. The poor assistant twitches in surprise, pressing his lips in a thin line while his eyes curiously look at Levi. Noticing the stare, Levi takes a drink of his tea, still frowning.

He was annoyed.

"What's your schedule for today?" Levi spoke with a particular harsh tone, meeting [Name]’s eyes with his cold ones. 

"Hmn..." [Name] tilts his head, looking at the side to try and remember, "session with Reiner and some observations outside."

Levi wasn’t in the mood— Reiner? Really? And Zeke left him to die or what was his plan? Unfortunately, simple workers like Levi couldn’t watch over session of other doctors, so trying to stalk watch [Name]’s session wasn’t possible. He bluntly spoke, already getting up. “What are you waiting for, then? Get your shit and let's go."

The assistant could clearly hear an annoyed tone coming from the ravenette. Was it because he rejected his ride the other day? [Name] didn't have the opportunity to see his 'scary shorty mode' as Hanji had told him before. It's not as if he had wanted to, but it seems he definitely did something wrong earlier to get him talking like this. Should he apologize...?

Taking his belongings, [Name] blinked as he remembered. "Ah! This was supposed to be an observation but I didn't do anything!" The assistant widened his eyes, clearly worried by his lack of work. Zeke would be angry at him, no doubt!

The ravenette closed his eyes, not worried. "don't worry. You will see what they really are one of these days."

He blinks, confused yet curious. "What they really are...?" [Name] tried to get an answer, but Levi didn't respond after that. What could he mean by that?

Before leaving, he waves to his patients and tries to meet gazes with a certain guard. When he sees Vincent, the guard just winks at him with a serious face.

Is that his 'business' face? [Name] can't help but chuckle, leaving with a big smile.

The ravenette, clearly aware of the two love birds, looked at the guard with the coldest eyes. Surprisingly, Vincent holds the stare without a problem. Levi just leaves with a grunt, clearly annoyed.

The patients who were being escorted by guards, didn’t hide their hate towards the popular guard. Vincent didn’t express any fear nor other emotion— staying serene and going on with his job, the guard remained unaffected by the glares. 

As Vincent get behind the patients, his partner got besides him, whispering just for him to hear. “Whatever you are doing with that worker, I advice you to nope the fuck out, man. I  could sense the hate all across my spot.”

”A few glares won’t make me stop.”

”Few glares? Don’t you know which glares, Vince? Fucking Zeke Jaeger. And don’t make me name the patients!”

”Don’t care— what could they do anyways?”

”Uh, dunno, kill you? Are you being an idiot on purpose?” Abe rolled his eyes, “do I need to refresh your memory about what happened to Jin and Roman?”

”They disappeared. Why would you bring them again?”

”Because they were killed and then disposed. Didn’t you hear the news about two bodies being found around these forests? Pretty coincidental, if you ask me.”

”[Name] doesn’t have to do anything with it— what’s the correlation here?”

”Look, man–“ before Abe could spoke about it, their radios transmitted hysterical and loud voices being interjected by static. That only meant one thing— problems upstairs. “Aw, shit. Who is it this time?”

Both guards ran to the upper floors, preparing themselves for whatever  they were going to see. “Don’t think this conversation is over, dumbass!”

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

The doctor's expression was drastically different— it seemed as if he was worried about losing something. The patient's face, in the other hand, was frowning with dull eyes.

“You got lucky— If [Name] hadn’t talked to Erwin who knows what he would have done to you!” Zeke exclaimed, not believing his brother's behavior. He knew the repercussions patients got if they harmed a worker— if it wasn't for Zeke, Eren would have gotten a worst punishment by now. Even more when [Name] was the one he hurt.

The brunette raised an eyebrow— plenty of patients harmed their doctors and the boss had never been called for something like that— after all, patients were nothing but mere objects for them to experiment on. Hell, Eren never hear of him at all. Why he appears when is [Name]...?

Then Eren realizes. “He is the same.” The comment made his brother raise an eyebrow, confused.

“What are you saying?”

The brunette crossed his arms, a smug smile appearing on his face. “Angel does have an effect on everyone. To say even the boss had fallen for it...” He really is something. "How, even? Is he really going into everyone's bed?"

Anger grew on Zeke has he heard those dirty words being throw at his precious assistant. His brother calling him a whore was more than aggravating— infuriating. It seemed Eren already began to made an image of [Name] that shaped into a dark and twisted one— a pretty assistant got a job and suddenly everyone is kissing his shoes.

"I won't allow you talking about him like that. He is my assistant— it's better if you began to cooperate for yours, and my sake."

The statement only made Eren narrow his eyes in suspicion— it was clear his brother wasn't just bothered by their safety. He too was captivated by this person, not just protective. Surprising, to say at least. He thought his brother wasn't the type of person to get to attached, but it seems he was wrong after all.

That time in the gardens gave it away, anyways.

"You too like him," he raises an eyebrow, "surprising when you don't care about who is killed here."

Zeke just looks at him with crossed arms, clearly unhappy by his childish behavior.

"It's just little time something happens to angel. You know that, right?"

"You are my little brother, Eren. I care about you— that's why I'm telling you to stop. You don't know how Erwin is really like."

"And you?" He spat, "what are you really like?"

The blonde scratches his ear, sighing. This isn't going well. "I'm just asking you to behave. [Name] isn't a bad person at all, and I know you can see that but are too stubborn to do otherwise. Even Armin likes him."

"He's easy gullible."

"Tell that to the five other doctors who tried to help and he didn't even speak to," Eren presses his lips into a thin line, "you should trust Armin's choices. [Name] is not a bad guy."

"Say that to the others who take advantage of us before."

Why does he have to be this exasperating?

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

“Where are you going after?” [Name] tried to strike a conversation, feeling uncomfortable by the lack of talk.

”With Erwin. He wanted to discuss some matters to me.”

”I–Is something wrong?”

”No.” He answered without looking at him, frowning.

It was clear Levi was angry at him still, or maybe irritated by him? [Name] pressed his lips in a thin line, not pleased by the situation. The raventte didn't even wanted to look at him— he looked annoyed and tensed. Before the assistant could ask what was wrong, multiple voices quickly approaching interrupted him.

“Get out of the way!” Multiple guards ran trough the hall, almost hitting [Name] if it wasn’t for Levi quick reflexes. The ravenette pulled [Name] against him, both pressing against the wall to let the workers trough. Some people didn’t have such luck, hearing the yell and grunt some let out. [Name] could notice most guards had some type of syringe in their hands, and some others tasers.

What's happening? The workers headed to the upper floors along with some nurses. They looked worried, and many calls were heard from their radios. "L—Levi, do you know what's happening?"

"Problems in the upper floors, that's all you need to know." Levi freed his grip on [Name], letting the assistant free. The ravenette dusted his clothes, "I'm leaving." He spoke, already walking away without another word.

[Name] frowned slightly, trying to not feel upset. He waved even if the other didn't look, raising his voice to let Levi hear, "s-see you later!!" He didn't receive a gesture in return.

Sighing, [Name] clapped his hands and changed his expression to a brighter one— he couldn't let his patient see him like that! He turned, nodding at the two guards guarding the door, receiving the same gesture. A guard opened the door to let him in, [Name] thanked him and came in with a small smile, preparing himself for anything.

[Name] was met with bored gold eyes looking at the wall, but just as the attention shifted to the assistant the expression quickly changed to a playful one.

“Finally I got to see your pretty face.”

“We meet again, Mr. Braun," [Name] knew Reiner's session would be a pain to handle. He was crude, didn't sugar coat his words and didn't care about decency. Even so, he was grateful Reiner’s warrior persona hadn’t showed before— but it made him wonder when his luck would wear out. “Been pretty long since we last meet like this!”

“Not too long,” he said, “you know— I’ve dreamed about you. The types of dreams where I have you under me and—“

“That’s nice to hear, Reiner. Reaaally nice...” he pinched the bridge of his nose, “well, we saw each other in the mess hall. Its nice to see you have friends around!”

“Bertholdt has talked about you— impressive how he has taken an special interest on you,” he leaned on his chair, “he doesn’t like me talking about how good looking you are.”

“Mr. Hoover is really nice. We have both got a great time together—“

A loud noise is heard when Reiner bash his hands on the table, his expression turning into an angry one, “I won’t allow it!” He shouts with fury, a drastic change from his playful self from before.

“Mr. Braun,” [Name] controls his fear and talks in a soft voice, not wanting to get killed. The warrior just woke up, “I’m not here to harm any of you— that’s been my promise since I got here.”

“I won’t fucking allow a demon like you touch nor make him fall in love with you— you are nothing but a devil trying to use us.”

[Name] didn’t know how the blond’s cuffs were resisting— would that even save him?

“Bertholdt is just too blind to see the real devil you are— but I can.” He slowly stands, “He’s so idiotic to see— you are such an evil creature, luring him with sweet words and that pretty face you wear— but deep inside, you are nothing but a filthy demon that needs to perish.” [Name] gulps under such cold stare.

“I’m not here to harm any of you, Mr. Braun,” he reassures, “I’m here to help you, not to hurt— I seek for your future, Reiner. That's always been what I promised since I got here.”

He snorts. “It isn’t the first time I’ve heard the exact same words before— you don’t actually think that. You devils just experiment on us. We are your guinea pigs— nobody in this hell actually helps us!"

Experiments...? The word reminded him of Hanji— the woman had called her patients exactly that. Nevertheless, the assistant didn't think it was something more than a horrible nickname. "Experiment? What are you talking about? My assistance doesn't support something as horrible as that."

"Act as if you don't know, pretty boy. This isn't new— you are just like them." He slowly gets up, as if he was trying to not scare the deer,  "but I won't allow it anymore." And before [Name] could say anything else, Reiner quickly took his collar and pinned him in the desk with a slam, as he muttered immediately, “you scream and I’ll snap your neck.”

Reiner’s face was terrifying. [Name] didn’t want to show any fear, but seeing just how cold his eyes were, how he was glaring with such hatred made him froze. This didn’t look good— what did Reiner wanted to with him? If he wanted to kill him, he would already have done that the second he got his hands on him.

”What should I do to you? Maybe I can have some fun before killing you?” Reiner spoke with playfulness in his voice, but his cold expression didn’t change. There wasn't even a smile— just a bored look.

”F–Fun?” [Name] quietly muttered, hoping the type of fun Reiner was thinking wasn’t the one he feared. He had to do something before that happened, but him being so much weaker than Reiner was obvious. Fighting him wasn’t a good idea if he clearly had the upper hand. Then what could he do? He should throw something at the wall to let the others notice there was something happening— yeah, or at least the lack of noises would weird them out. "Reiner," [Name] tried to get his attention, and he tried his best to not let a sound out when he felt hands getting under his shirt.

"No talking— don’t even whimper.” [Name] could feel the rough hands over his skin— twitching his body with every touch, but not in a good way. Shivers that were caused by fear. Biting his lip, [Name] tried to think about what to do. It was clear Reiner didn’t want to hear him at all.

But something changed— it seemed Reiner’s ‘fun’ didn’t last long, because the hands who were exploring the assistant’s skin slowly stopped in [Name]’s neck. Before [Name] could snap out of his thoughts and realize the danger, a hard pressure on his neck made him unable to breathe.

”You can deceive him, but not me.” Reiner’s cold eyes stared at [Name]’s teary face, but there was no enjoyment from it. 

Between him trashing around trying to get Reiner off, [Name] took his clipboard and threw in on the wall, hoping that would get the guards’ attention about what was happening. Hitting the blond with his wouldn't be of any use— Fortunately, the door quickly opened to reveal the two guards already with syringes in hand. 

Thankfully the guards were capable of handling this quickly— before Reiner could have done more harm, a guard injected him in the neck harshly, freeing the assistant from his grip, allowing him to breathe. [Name] fell to the floor, coughing and breathing, shocked by Reiner’s violence. The other guard was unable to help him at the moment, seeing the blond patient trashing around and yelling curses at the guard trying to control him.

[Name] was surprised— whatever that syringe had, it didn’t seem to work at all. Without knowing, [Name] backed up and pressed his back on one of the corners, still out of it and with a horrible headache. He could only see what was happening— the two guards trying to control the warrior but with no avail.

”Reiner, stop!”

[Name] had to do something! But what could he do?! He couldn’t handle Reiner even if he tried his best. The blond seemed out of it, blinded by rage. The only thing he could do was knock him out— but with what? This room was basically empty! Shifting his vision back and forth, the only thing [Name] could focus on was on the chairs— fortunately, they were metallic, so at least a little push would make Reiner knocked out. [Name] only hoped it didn’t hurt that bad.

There wasn’t another choice— Reiner wasn’t willing to listen to him nor anybody. One of the guards was already on the floor with a bloodied head, while the other tried to fight the blond off. Breathing erratically, [Name] gritted his teeth and stood up with fake courage, taking the chair, gripping it as hard as he could, his skin turning white, and while Reiner was turned, [Name] said,

”I’m sorry Reiner!” And with a loud whimper the terrified assistant hit the back of Reiner’s head two times, luckily knocking him out. [Name] immediately threw the chair out of the way, kneeling to Reiner’s side and check on his pulse. “I didn’t hit you that hard, did I?!”

His attention then went for the other injured guard. Checking his pulse too, [Name] sighed in relief there was. He spoke to the other guard, “a—are you okay?!”

The man didn’t answer at first. He breathed heavily for a couple of minutes, seeing Reiner laying on the floor. “I thought I was going t fucking die,” he got up, dripping his sweat from his forehead. He then went to where [Name] was, checking on his partner. “Let’s just call the nurses...” the man quickly took his radio and spoke with codes [Name] didn’t know, signaling where they were and what they needed. “You didn’t have to do that. If you didn’t do what you did the three of us would be dead by now— three people to add in the fucking list.”

”The list...?”  A LIST? Has anybody died in this job?! "W-What do you mean?"

"What do I mean?" The guard raised an eyebrow, blinking skeptically. "Since when do you work here?"

"U-Uh— one week ago?"

"It was just a dark joke, don't take it too seriously, doc."

Two nurses and two more guards went inside, interrupting [Name]'s curiosity about 'the list'. One guard and one nurse carried the unconscious guard on a stretcher, while the other pair laid Reiner on his bed. [Name], worried about a possible concussion, noticed there wasn't another stretcher for him.

"W-Wait— won't you send him in the infirmary?" The assistant asked, allowing being checked by the other nurse.

"We are not allowed to do that, doctor." The nurse simply answered, as if it wasn't a big deal. She didn't even look at him in the eyes—

"B-But—" [name] hissed when being touched on his neck, "he could be hurt!"

"We are not allowed to bring patients to the infirmary— the infirmary is only for workers: guards, doctors, and nurses."

"Then, how would you check on him without equipment...?"

"We are experts, doctor. No need to worry about Mr. Braun's health."

"Not to worry...? B-But I—"

"I believe you have to go to the infirmary, doctor. That bruise doesn't look good."

"But he—"

"Would we need to notify the director of your refusal on following instructions, doctor?" The nurse snapped, subtly glaring at him.

[Name] faltered. What was going on? "...of course not."

"Then let's go to the infirmary."

[Name] could not stop himself from looking behind him, watching Reiner on his bed. There wasn't blood on his clothes nor his head, but the nurse had told him he was "completely fine". The nurse hurried [Name] outside, tightening her grip on [name]'s arm, guiding him.

All the way to the infirmary, [Name] thanked he didn't run into someone he knew— if they reacted so worried with what happened with Eren, he didn't want to know how Erwin would react until he knew about this.

"Please, please don't let them notice..."

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

After going to the infirmary, the nurses had told him there wasn't anything harming. The bruise would eventually heal by itself, so there wasn't much to be checked anymore. Unfortunately for him, the bruise looked horrible and was much, much noticeable than the last one. Well, [name] couldn't really whine about it, at least the only thing he got was a nasty bruise, and not what Reiner was going for at first. Whatever change of mind he had at that moment, at least [name] was grateful for it.

The rest of his day was outside, watching other's patients routines. It seems for today there was luck on his side, because it didn't seem Zeke, Levi, Erwin nor Mike knew about the incident that transpired not to long ago. If they had knew, he would be in Erwin's office by now, or maybe the director was just waiting for tomorrow to decide what to do with him and Reiner.

Tomorrow was going to be a rough day for sure— Erwin had already forgiven Eren for a small angry attack, and [name] was sure he wouldn't pass this situation even if he begged for it. Hell, [name] would try regardless— Reiner has a serious disorder, that, at least, is a justification for what happened. The assistant was sure to try to not harm Reiner— something was not right...

[Name] could already see Vincent in the distance, waiting for him at the door. Of course— Vince had invited him to his apartment to eat burgers. How could he forget? Well, the past situation was stressful and dangerous, and the only thing in his mind for the rest of the day was tomorrow. Just remembering Erwin's cold stare made him nervous...

"You finish?" Vince asked, but just as [name] got nearer, the guard couldn't ignore the nasty bruise he had in his neck. "Woah! What the hell is that?!" he widened his eyes and locked closely at [name]'s neck.

[Name] tried to hide it by pulling his collar up, frowning. "It's not that serious... just had an accident today."

"That doesn't look like an accident, [name]." Vincent looked worried, "what happened? who did you have session with?"

[Name] pressed his lips, not sure if to answer with the truth. Well... Vincent had helped him before, and he didn't seem to be one for gossip. "Reiner."

The face Vincent made was hilarious to [name]. It seemed he had seen a ghost— the looked pale by the name. "R-Reiner?! Holy fuck, are you alright?! What did he do? Did the guards help you?! How—I—"

"Calm down!" [Name] chuckled, "it's not that serious! The guards came quickly and helped me."

"Not that serious!? Did he choke you?!" Vincent looked hurt— almost embarrassed. Was because he wasn't there to help him?

"...Yeah," the assistant scratched his face, "but he didn't do anything else, okay? why don't we just leave? I don't want to see the others right now..."

The guard could see [name] uneasiness, as he was looking around discretely. "Why? You don't want to be found with that on your neck?"

"You know how they get when something happens to me. They get... like a mom." Both laugh.

"But you know they will know eventually, right? Specially the director, he knows everything that happens here."

"I know... but I don't want to be here when that happens— I know tomorrow I'm going to get called once again to Mr. Smith's office, so let's leave!!" The assistant began to push Vincent to the door playfully.

"Okay, okay!" Vincent laughs, "let's go get some burgers, okay? And then we can watch some TV to at least forget for today what happened." [name] couldn't agree more with that. He was really hungry.

While Vincent talked, he discretely tangled his fingers with [name]'s, surprising him by the gesture. The assistant looks at him with a blush and widen eyes, but keeps silent. He averts his gaze, not minding Vincent's action. The guard grins, squeezing his hand.

"I know you will like them!" Vincent grins, looking childish. [Name]'s heart fluttered, smiling along with him. Both of them waved at Margaret before leaving. The woman was behind the reception, gently smiling at them and waving back.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

The trip trough Vince’s apartment is filled with laughter. The guard has come to the realization he loved hearing [Name]’s laugh, and his smile is too adorable to ignore. His past anger of what happened went forgotten, and just the image of [name] smiling for silly things he says makes him have butterflies.

They stop pretty far away from their main destination, dropping on a food area. There are plenty of food stalls around with bright signs— the place seemed dirty and not very well kept, but that didn’t matter to all the people who were around. [Name] didn't care much either— it wasn't as if his place was five stars, and he himself wasn't that caring.

Vincent guides him trough the alleys, getting on the burger stall he tells him about. The place seems pretty lonely— there's two pairs of people sitting on the counter eating their burgers. The one behind the counter notices Vincent, seeming to know him.

"Vince! Been waiting for you, where the hell were you?" the man speaks in a deep voice, "and who's that? your boyfriend?"

"W-Wha— James, don't scare him!!"

It was a man, maybe on his early forties. He had blond hair and his eyes were brown— he looked pretty tall too, maybe 6'0? He looked buff too, almost like Reiner. There was a scar on his neck and chin. He wore an apron with an image of a burger with a happy face on it, along with the name of the stall— 'happy mcburgers'. The apron and his rough appearance was a big contrast, and [Name] tried to hold his laughter as best as he could, not wanting to appear rude.

"Don't worry, [Name]. You can laugh at this fool! Who even wears an apron like that looking like a thug?!" Vincent shouted, smirking. The people who were sitting couldn't handle their laughter, and James only yelled at Vincent.

"And who wants to look like a stick like you, brat!!! Don't even insult me when you are eating my sacred food, boy!" he glares at Vince, sighing exasperatedly, "anyways, I'm James. I guess you are the [Name] he always talks about?"

[name] blinks, interested. "Oh? He talks about me?"

In the other hand, Vincent looks horrified, trying to shut James up. "James, don't, man!!! I take back what I said!!"

James laughs devilish, placing a hand on Vince's face and pushing him away, ignoring his yells. "Of course he does. He doesn't shut the hell up— in fact, you are the only thing he talks about when he gets here."

"That's... interesting," [name] said, blushing a little, "are they bad things?"

"Bad things? This idiot talks wonders about you— how CUTE you are and how—" the man gets interrupted by Vincent throwing ketchup at him, "what the fuck?! Stop using MY ketchup like that, you dumbass!"

"You didn't shut the hell up, old man!!!" he turns to [name], "don't hear him, [name]! He just wants to embarrass me!"

The assistant just laughs, seeing the two fight.

"Anyways, James!! Just give me the usual, but make that two." Vincent pouts, "you should thank me I got you a costumer!!!"

"Thank you? For one costumer? Man, you SAVED my job!" James sarcastically replies, already cooking. [Name] watches intently how he cooks the meat, almost drooling. "Anyways, how is that job going for you both? This kid actually looks smarter than you, so I know he's not a guard." He says, signaling [Name].

"You—!" Vincent frowns, "[Name] here is a doctor, and It's MY job to protect him!" He grins, signaling himself. "Been doing a pretty good job so far!"

"Yeah, I can see that," the man looks at the assistant's bruises, and the boy shyly hides it. "You both better need to look for another job. Your luck may run out sooner nor later."

"Hey, hey! You think I don't know that? But the pay is good, soooo..."

James and Vincent talk for a while, but [Name] doesn't join the conversation that much. It seems James knows somehow it's a dangerous job, possibly because Vincent talks about it? But what did he mean by 'luck'...? Yes, today was actually, a bad day for [Name], but in the end it went okay, as no one was killed. Not that he thought someone could get killed, anyways. Was that a possibility? Well, if he didn't contain Reiner someone surely was going to be harmed severely. But someone getting killed? That sounded too far... As he remembered, he didn't found anything that pointed out the Asylum had any accident like that. This only reminded him of what the guard said to him...

"Let's goooo!" Vincent's voice interrupts him, grabbing his wrist. "Thank you, James!! See you later or never!!"

"You would make me a favor if I stopped seeing you irritating face!" his eye twitches, but his expression softens a little to see [Name], who is waving at him, "and it was nice to meet you, kid. Hope you can bear this idiot."

Vincent guides him between some alleys, stating it was faster. [Name] grew a little worried by how shady they looked, and tried to not think about some thief coming out from the shadows to get them. Luckily the two made it safely to an apartment complex, and [name] could not stop thinking about his own— it looked pretty similar to the exterior of his own.

"You live alone?" [name] asked as both went up the stairs. The elevator had a note saying “out of service”, but thankfully Vincent’s room wasn’t at the top of the building.

"Yep. Been on my own since I was sixteen."

[Name] blinks, surprised by how young he had been. "Really?! And... your parents...?"

Vincent bits his lip, "Well... they left me on my own, so it has been me cycling around jobs."

"S-Sorry for asking..."

"Hey! Don't look upset!" He touches his hand, "if you think about it, if something in my life had been different I wouldn't be here with you."

"You say embarrassing things to someone you have shortly met..." Vincent signals a door— 302. He unlocks the door, opening and inviting [Name] in.

The guard grins as [Name] enters. "Love at first sight, possibly?"

[Name] laughs, "you are dumb!”

The apartment is cozy, just like his own. Vince tells him to sit on the sofa while he takes something to drink. “Do you drink?”

”Not really— I can’t handle it very well.” It was true– [Name] couldn’t remember the last time he had drank, but Porco had told him he can get very touchy when he is in the drunk state.

Vincent places the food on the table, turning the tv after. Immediately, an urgent voice of a woman fills the room— it seems it’s a horror movie. The brunette sits on the floor, looking more comfortable there. [Name] follows.

[Name] takes a bite from the burger, watcing the tv. There’s curiosity growing on him, wanting to know more about Vince, and he can’t help but ask, "ho did you even find the asylum?"

Vincent takes his time, cleaning his face. "A friend told me they were hiring instantly, and I saw the payment so I left my previous job and well here I am."

The assistant looks at him, "Is it hard...?"

Vincent takes a sip of his beer, "sometimes," he hums, "how did you find it?"

"I found an ad in the newspaper! I was surprised they gave me an interview right away, and I was much more surprised when Mr. Smith hired me the same day!" [Name] can’t help but smile at the memory of his messy interview and Erwin’s nice behavior towards him.

"And you..." he asked inquisitive, "don't think about some other places to work...? maybe near your place?"

[name]'s joy flattered, "I tried to but this was the only place I found an opportunity.” he frowns, feeling a bit upset, “A—Am I... Irritating?"

Vincent’s eyes widen, looking horrified. "Oh god, no! I didn't mean it that way, [name]!" He hold his hand tightly, trying to fix his error, "I'm just saying that this work— it can't be hard and dangerous! And, uh, I care about you. And also like you, and I don't want to see you hurt, and—"

[Name] blinks repeatedly, hearing the small confession. "You like me?"

The brunette gulps loudly, blushing a little. He looked embarrassed, evading [Name]’s gaze. ”Y—Yeah... yes, I do.”

[Name]’s face redden. Of course he liked him! Vincent was kind to him and he made it quite evident with his flirting— was that even a surprise?

“I thought that was pretty clear— with the other date and all...” he chuckles awkwardly. 

“B–But— I’m an idiot and dumb and clumsy and—“

“And I like you over all these things,” he grins, looking more confident, “could we... be together like that... someday?”

A small frown is clear in [Name]’s face, but his redden face doesn't wear out. He looks at Vince with unsure eyes, “W–We’ll see. Is that okay, Vincent?”

Vince can’t stop seeing [Name]’s pretty face— his long eyelashes, his soft lips pouting, how he looks at him... “S–Sure! Oh fuck, you are so cute!” the guard hides his blushing face behind his hand, laughing awkwardly. "Don't feel pressured or anything, o-okay?!"

"S-Sure!" [Name] hastily took a bite from his burger, watching the TV but not really processing what was on it. The confession had him thinking— did he like Vincent? He was kind to him, and never passed boundaries or did something he didn't like. He was reliable and looked for his security, but that was his job after all. [Name], on the other hand, didn't have much to offer. He was... pretty uncomfortable to be in another relationship after what had happened before... The assistant was glad Vincent didn't pressure him for an answer, though. He cleared his throat, wanting to change the subject. “Uhm... sorry If I’m obtrusive, but how come have you been able to sustain yourself for so long?”

Vincent blinks, his face coming to normality. ”Oh well,” he blinks at the tv a couple of times, “I knew I wouldn’t afford going to college, so I tried to finish high school. Unfortunately, I dropped in my senior year.” He takes a sip of his beer.

”It was tough being so young and trying to find a good job. As you expect, there were many jobs that weren’t that... nice. I tried to not get into shady ones, because I knew nothing good would come out of it in the end. I didn’t think it was worth it.”

[Name] subtly looks at him, playing with his hands. "Aren't you... in contact with your parents?"

He laughs, "hell no. Why would I? Mom even with his abu—" he stops himself, not finishing his sentence. Sighing, Vincent looks at the floor with a frown, clearly displeased by what he remembered. "Maybe someday I can get this weight off of me."

"I'm sorry, Vincent! I'll should just shut my mouth!" [Name] desperately tried to apologize, cursing mentally by his curiosity. Why couldn't he just shut up? Was he always this pushy?

"Perhaps I could tell you later, sweetheart." He smiles, "I can see you want to ask more things, so don't be shy."

[Name] takes a bit of his burger, looking at Vincent shyly. The guard curses mentally at how cute he looked once again. ”Since when have you been working at the asylum?”

”Two years,” he sighs, “I know it doesn’t look too dangerous, [Name]. But believe me, it gets risky every time."

"How come I haven't got anything dangerous?"

Vincent raises a brow. "Reiner session wasn't dangerous?"

"Well... not that much!" He laughs, hiding his bruises discretely.

"Okay, we do have months that are peaceful. Like now. But when we have the stressful months..." He rubs his temples, "no matter who is it, there's a chance they will have a meltdown."

"But..." [name] wonders— didn't the upper floor were being more active with guards and nurses lately? He couldn't deny seeing various workers going upstairs. "Lately many workers had gone to the upper floors. Does that mean we are going in the stressful state?"

"I'm afraid we are. I guess next month is going to be a nightmare."

"W-What has been the riskier thing that has happened?"

"Well, it varies, but these are some of my personal experiences. Sometime Reiner got so angry at something in the cafeteria he threw a table to another patient."

"He threw a table?!! But they look so heavy!"

"Yup. I was amazed at his strength— when we were remodeling the cafeteria we had to move the tables with two or three people." He explains, "that’s why they are heavy as hell, so things like that doesn’t happen. But now we take a lot of precaution around Reiner. The guy can just throw you a punch and knock you out.”

“I—I see...”

“There was another time where my past partner got his finger bit off by Sean, another patient."

"H-His finger!?" [Name] looks at his hands with fear, gulping. “H-He didn’t sue or anything?”

Vincent laughs, “of course. But surprise— the contract we sign explicitly says ‘we are not responsible of any harm or accident you may suffer’. That sucks.”

”T-That’s... horrible.” He didn’t even notice he signed to his death. Now working there didn’t sound too wonderful— everyone, no matter who, risked their lives to the people they were helping. If they were anyways.

“That’s why I’m telling you to reconsider.”

[Name] sighs. “As you know, finding a job isn’t easy,” he bits his lip, “I applied to nearly seven jobs and nobody wanted me. Mr. Smith is the only one who took compassion on me and hired me.” [Name] smiles at the memory of Erwin’s kindness— if it wasn’t for him, maybe [Name] would be in the streets by now.

Vincent’s face grim by the sound of Erwin, “that man—“

[Name]’s phone ringing interrupted their chat. The boy responds, looking pretty nervous by who the caller was. The guard raised a brow, pouting.

”Hello? Eh— Porco!” [Name] blinks, “sorry, I didn’t see the hour! Hey— it’s not that late!!!”

Vincent looks at the clock, surprised it’s now 9:30. How in the hell time flied so fast? 

Noticing the call ended, Vincent couldn’t stop himself from asking who the caller was— someone keeping track of where he was in such hours? “Who was it? Your boyfriend?”

”Of course not!! Porco is my neighbor, and my friend!! He gets really worried about me. You know, how it is in the nights around our areas," the assistant gets up, dusting himself, "I should get going..."

”Let me accompany you." Vincent followed suit, turning the tv off.

”Is there a bus stop near?”

"The only one near was the one we dropped by... so no, unfortunately," he frowns, ”sorry I don’t have a car— could’ve dropped you off but...” he blinks, grinning, “hey! I have a bicycle!!!”

”Uh—Hey! Can we get the two on it? Isn't it dangerous?"

"Of course not! We're going to look like these ghibli movies."

"You are ridiculous!"

For some strange reason Vincent had his bicycle forgotten in some room, but luckily it wasn't damaged and looked fine. Both left the apartment, both helping to not drop the bicycle on all the stairs. Eventually they succeed after some painfully minutes— as they left the building, [Name] sighed in relief and passed a hand trough his hair.

"Okay," Vincent gets on, turning to see [Name] as he grinned, "get on!"

[Name] chuckled nervously, getting behind Vincent. "Don't make us fall."

"Of course not! I'm like, a master in the bicycle..." Vincent spoke with a low voice, trying to mimic an old man. [Name] laughed, holding tight.

The ride was fun— Vincent tried to go as fast as possible, almost making both fall. They passed James' stall, [Name] waving at him with a big smile. The man just laughed, whispering to himself 'young love'. Both Vincent and [Name] talked all the way, or more like yelled at each other. Nevertheless, the ride come to an end once [Name] saw his lonely and shady building in the distance. Once Vincent stopped [Name] got off, trying to fix his messy hair.

"That was pretty fun, wasn't it?" Vincent spoke, looking at [Name] with a big smile.

The assistant returned the expression, "I can't deny it. But it was pretty dangerous too!"

"But there wasn't any damage— so it's completely fine."

The assistant shakes his head with a chuckle, ”Thank you, Vincent.” [Name] pecks his cheek, “see you tomorrow!” He says as waves at him and walks away, feeling warmer.

Vincent, with a goofy smile, gently rubs his kissed cheek. “S-Sure! See you tomorrow [Name]!!”

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

[Name] sighs as he enters the building, feeling tired. He didn't mind it tho— spending time with Vincent was nice, and plus, he learned a little more about him. A relationship seemed pretty soon; he didn't feel ready at all, but he couldn't deny the guard was at least, growing on him. It wasn't as if [Name] was that defensive about making friends, but when it came to serious relationships he was... thoughtful. That was something serious!!

”There you are!" A voice is heard coming near, and [Name] tries to hide his new bruise as quickly as he can.

Where were you— what the,” he blinks, “WHAT IS THAT?!” Porco's eyes widened, pointing at his neck.

”Porco!! Don’t raise your voice, there are people sleeping!!” [Name] whispered, trying to shush Porco.

”What the fuck just happened to you?! I told you that place was bad!” He angrily whispered, gritting his teeth. “I can’t believe it!”

”It was an accident! It’s not that bad!”

”Haven’t you seen yourself in a mirror? That’s no accident. What the hell happened?” Porco took [Name]'s collar and pulled it a little, seeing the damage. It looked pretty bad— he didn't want to imagine how he got that, but he already had some ideas in mind.

"It was an accident." [Name] said once again, covering it. "Nothing happened to me, Porco. I'm completely fine!"

"I can't believe you— what do you want? To get killed?" He huffed, crossing his arms, "drop that job immediately."

[Name] blinks, "drop it? o-of course not! It was so hard to get hired! I can't just do that, Porco!"

"[Name], do you have a death wish?"

"I can't." [name] frowns, "I won't do that— I can't just be selfish and leave them like that."

"Them? Really, [name]?" Porco passes a hand on his temples, clearly exasperated, "don't tell me you just grow attached to whoever you are talking about."

"They are patients, and I can't just leave them like that after getting inside their lives!" [Name] pouts, not liking one a bit what Porco suggests. He can't leave them, honestly. Leaving would not help nothing at all, and if [name] can guess, it's not that he could leave, anyways.

"You surely can get this stubborn— I really can't believe this." He grows, "and this happens just when I'm leaving... what a nice thing to happen."

"Look, Porco— nothing will happen to me, alright? I promise!"

"Of course, sure thing. Only you would say something like that when you almost got choked to death, right?"

[Name] confident voice flatters, "I-I didn't get—"

"Of course you fucking did," he grits his teeth, "I'll think on something. You won't be there forever, [Name]. That place will only kill you."

"I'm promising you nothing will happen," [name] raises his pinky finger, "I'm swearing it."

"You can be really childish, you know that?"

"If you don't complete the promise with me, I will get cursed!"

"Dummy..." the blond tangles his pinky finger with [name]'s, looking at the other side in embarrassment. "Just hang on, okay? Don't do stupid stuff over a company that won't do anything for you in return."

"Porco, I'm swearing to my dignity nothing will happen." [Name] frowns, straightening his stance.

"What dignity?"

"Porco!!!"

e m p t y / 14

shingeki no kyojin | series [various x male!amnesiac!reader] summary: [Name], an amnesiac boy awakes in a unknown place – trying to remember anything makes him have horrible headaches. Who is he? And why he can’t remember his own face? masterlist

chapter fourteen

seek

“Nothing is going to work, XXXXXXX.”

”Don’t speak so negatively— this kid is our future.”

”Our future? XXXXXX, we have no future! Yeah, he controls it, then what? Can we return from the death? Of course fucking not!”

”I believe in him. He will be one of the people who free us all— you heard him, didn’t you? This kid is strong.”

”Is that what you call strong? The brat can barely handle a headache, and that’s where he cries like a goddamn baby. This kid is not going to be a hero, nor a savior. This world is condemned to fail like in the beginning.”

”He wouldn’t suffer much if you weren’t so intrusive onto him,” they sigh, “the XXXX may have kill us all, but our destiny made us stay together— we have to protect this child.”

“How the fuck can we protect if we’re not there, and this kid doesn’t bear a damn headache?”

”He won’t try to remember— he knows the pain well.”

”That’s right, XXXXXXX. W——, stop being like this— [Name] will get a concussion or get ill like before. The child has had enough already.”

”As if I care. It’s not as if I have faith in the first place,” he sighs, “we should have stayed hidden... the X?#! was a son of a bitch for doing what he did. Why the fuck did we returned?”

”We can’t let the past repeat again— this world doesn’t deserve that.”

”Humanity deserves it.”

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

"—me]! Enough sleep!"

"Hmn...?" He opens his eyes slowly, recognizing Jean with an annoyed expression— [name] noticed he was already ready for training, "how tiring..."

"If you don't wake up now you will in three hours— so get dressed already,” he helps [Name] sit, getting his messy hair out of his face and talking to him to not fall asleep again. Marco was near to learn about how to wake up [Name] properly, as he was his partner. He didn't say it out loud, but [Name]'s sleepy and messy hair was a pretty cute and funny look.

The thought made him blush, looking at the side in shyness, "What I'm thinking?!" He smiled sheepishly, rubbing the side of his neck.

Successfully making [Name] getting off the bed, he stretches like a cat. Looks like Jean has already placed his uniform on the bed to not make it more difficult to him. "Thank you, Jean."

His friend sighs, gritting his teeth. Irritated by such careless attitude, Jean ordered him, "just dress already, okay?"

"Aaaah? Jean looks like a mom! HAHAHA!" Connie jokes, laughing with everyone else. This makes Jean's blush worse, not liking the spotlight one a bit.

This is what I was trying to avoid!!! DAMMIT!

"S-SHUT UP!"

“You are talking too loudly,“ [name] rubbed his eye, frowning. They were so loud in the mornings— he couldn’t wait for their day off to sleep as much as he wanted.

“That will be necessary to make you stay awake, don’t you think?" Marco chuckled sweetly, helping [name] to button his shirt. “[name] does look as cute as a kitten, but he is strong, or even stronger than Annie... For some reason, I feel... safe,” he thinks with a tint of scarlet on his face, finishing his actions. It was true— [Name] wasn’t an idiot, much less clueless. Marco believed his friend stood his ground with whoever, and if [name] noticed the true dark intentions of others, they would pay a big prize for it. He had to be just waken up from that slumber in which the freckled boy wouldn't leave him alone.

“That's annoying,” he yawns, "I can't wait to sleep in the woods again..."

“The woods? Wouldn't that be dangerous? You don't know how many wolves can be there! Or even bears!!"

"Bears are cute," [name] blinked, "I wouldn't mind."

"Don't say that!!! They are dangerous!"

"But cute," he chuckled, "do you think Reiner would win a fight with a bear? Bertolt is huge, but I think Reiner would win."

Marco blinked a few times as he processed the sudden question. Laughing, the freckled boy imagined such scene. "What was that question for?"

"Dunno— just thought about it," he stands up, seeing Marco finished buttoning his shirt. "What are we doing today?"

"Oh—! We are doing a training in the woods! I think it's a survival thing— so maybe we would be there for two days," he smiled, "isn't that exciting?"

"The woods?" [name] grinned.

"You won't find a bear, [name]!"

"If I'm lucky maybe I would be paired with Reiner..." he mutters, tapping his lower lip with his finger.

The freckled boy sighed, amused by such interesting person. [Name] could be incredible when he wanted— he sure said silly things, but when the situation was needed he was responsible and took things in a serious manner. Analyzing him was interesting and funny— it was as if Marco was watching a deer from a hide place, observing and taking notes. [Name] was sure different, but Marco couldn't pin point what was the thing that made him who he was— his unusual eyes? the mark he had on his shoulder? the stuff he said? his motivations? He couldn't describe it, but it was pleasant to spent time with him.

"—co. Marcooooo..." [name]'s voice filled his ears. He didn't even notice him losing himself in his thoughts, "what were you thinking about? Are you sleepy?"

Marco gently laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Sorry— I was just thinking," he looks at [name], "we should go for breakfast— there's still time, so let's go!"

[name] blinked, tilting his head. It wasn't often Marco got lost in his thoughts, "...okay," looking at Jean, who was still fighting with Connie, [name] spoke out of him, "we are going to breakfast, Jeanbo!" and with that, [name] took Marco's hand to leave with a grin on his face. He didn't want to stay and hear Jean's yells at him— he could hear Connie's laughter as he repeated the nickname. Jean is going to be angry at me... Oh well.

Marco just laughed, amused. He really never wanted training days to end.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

As breakfast finished, Marco left first to get ready with Jean— the both of them were eager for today's training. [Name] took his time to finish, leaving the barrack to find the others. Unfortunately, some other thing made him remember how unlucky he could be.

He bumped into someone else, making the poor victim fall on the ground. 

"I'm sorry— I didn't see you," [Name] spoke with worry, offering his hand to the other to take— it was a petite blonde girl. The boy blinked, tilting his head as he saw the resemblance of a pretty doll. Hmn... I know her. What's her name...?

But when their hands touched, an electrifying sensation passed trough arm to his eyes, making them freeze in the spot. It seemed the girl felt it too, because her friend quickly hushed [Name]'s hand from her, making them wake up from the strange daze.

P̷̟͑r̸̨̢̛͙͕͈̲̻͓͔͍̣̮͋̍͒̃̈́͜x̴̧̘̯̹̦͙̭̜͉͔̙͍̫͆͑̉#̴̨̢͉̲̥̞̤̣̦͕̹̙͌̾̅̏́͂͋̅ë̶̙̭͔̞̥͌̇̇̄͝x̷̮̺͍̗͍͖̟͙͛͜ͅx̶͙̭͗̂͛̌͝ ̵̢͚͍̙̪̜̙̜̣̭̮̦̠̅̑̅͋̈͌̈́̄ͅẍ̶̧̨̢̮͉̻̮͍̳͔͚̺̖̝̮́̂̄̋͌͆̏̆!̶̪͉̞̲͍͙̟̮͈̫̗͖̔̀̕#̴̱̠̄̑̂̈̍̈́́ ̷̨̡̢̧̥̜̼̪̐͌̂͊͊̐͌͘K̶̞̤͚̗̳̈́̏͗̚͠į̶̍̐̽͐̐ņ̶̝͕̮̺͓̄̋̊͜͝g̶͈̗̹̑͋͠ ̴̢̱̹̳̹̠̱̖̪͆̓̀̎̓̕f̵̳̤̮̒̇͂x̸̧̗̦͓̱̖͙̞̩̤̤̠̦̜͆̃̅͗̑̂̕x̶̧̤̖͈̥̰͎͇̻̙̰͇͇̠̉̂́̓̍͊͂͘͜͝x̵͈̲͖͕̺̘͎̤̠̳̪̋͌̃͑̉̈͌̃̍̚͝ ̵̛̪̝͔̖̖͓̠͖̖͕͒̎̏̐̽̀M̴̘͕̲̥̯̍̈́͗̒̃̑x̷̟̳̄̔#̴͔̣̺̭̯̪̒̄͌͋̔̃͐̓̍̃̊̽̚͝%̴̧̧̣͔̻͎̳̉̎͐̃̍͐͊̈̽͗̉͘̕͠͝x̸̛̦̬̦͇͙̲̙̻̙̜̊̈́͛̋͆̂̓͜͠ỵ̸̡̣̖̟͈͂͋̏̈́̑̓̈́̚!̷̢͉̰̯̳̺̪̟̪͓̰͚̖͖́͠

  "What the hell are you two doing? You look like weirdos," she narrows his eyes to both of them, curious about such strange interaction, "is this a secret code to make me not know what you are talking about, Christa?"

"Of course not! We just..." She sees [Name], who has the same unnerved aura she has. What was that? “We had an electric shock!” she chuckles awkwardly, trying to light the mood. 

It was strange, yet familiar. He had felt the same thing when he met Reiner back in the refugee— he had small electric shocks with other people before, but these two interactions felt much different. Nevertheless, [Name] doesn't think much of it and looks at the two girls who are staring at him intently. Blinking, the boy scratches his neck a little bit, feeling unnerved by the stare of the brunette girl. It looked like she was observing— it was an intense stare. [name] wanted to leave.

"Sorry, again," he speaks in a gentle tone, dusting the girl's clothes for her. Not liking him touching her one a bit, the tall girl slapped his hands off of her, surprising the boy by such rejection and force.

"Hey! Hands off of my Christa!" She spoke loudly, tightly hugging the blonde girl.

[name] frowns. ”Yours...?”

"Ymir! He's just helping out, let him be!" she spoke with a pout, turning to [Name], "don't mind her, she's always this dumb,"

"You break my nonexistent heart, my love,"

Ymir... What... a peculiar name was that... Ymir, Ymir, Ymir... Ymir?

  W̸̗̼̖̯̲̠͙̐ė̴̪̜̥̔͐̂̔̂̅͒̒͑̍͘͠͠ ̸̣̥͒͌̀͌͋f̵̣̫̥̼̠̟̪̏͒͆̃̏͒̈́̋͒͠͠ì̵̠̥̺̹̦̈́̅̊̽͒̐͝ͅġ̷̢̲̥̤̱̦̳͎̭͉͓̠̖͛̒͛̄͝ĥ̵̺̻͓̻̼̳̟̫͆̃̂͐̿̊̔͗̉͌̅̂̚͝t̵̢̞͚̥͎̭̗͍̖̂̿̆̉̆͛̕̚̚ ̴͉̣͕͍͇̎̑̋̓̽͆̋̾̓̈́͠f̴̺͎̦̖͕̪̳̹̅̒̒͌͆̆͗͑̊̂͋̽͒ǫ̶̲̰̣̣̤̩̈́͜͜͝ŗ̸̳̀ ̷̨̢͚̮̯͎̫̹̞͓͕̝̠̬̻̀̿̏̊ǭ̸̨̼͚͈͕̯̲̭̄͜͝ͅu̷̢͉̟̮̝̖͎̗̙͌̓̕͜͠ͅṟ̸̳̥̟̹̦̲̺͖̲̺͂̐͛͒̂̈̅̓̕͝ ̷̢̡͈̯̗͙̄̓̄̂̈́͘͜͝ͅğ̵͎͔̝͇̥̰̭͕̘o̷̡̳͌̍̓̓̅̍̆̆ḑ̶̹̬̯̿̆̐d̸̼̞̩̝̪̱͔̥̪̩̈ȩ̴̢̝̖̺̫̦̠̪̫̅̈́̅̀́͋͋͜͠͝s̶̲̜͕̓͌̕͝͝͠s̶̛̟̰͉͍͇̰̰̖͎̹̣̮̗̩͋̀̓͆͂̈̕ ̸̢̭̯̳̜̣̯͓̘̣͛̈̀̈́̑Ỹ̶͚͉̀͜m̶̡͖̜̤̻͉̟͂̉͐̈́̎̄̎̚͘ǐ̷͇͉̯̣̉̔r̷̢̧̛͇̬͖̫̝̤̞̦̲̥̱̃͊̒̎͝—̸̗̲̞̺͇̥̬̝̼̩̻̓͌̈̓̓̎͝͠͠ͅ ̵̮͖͈͕̹̈́O̴̟̜̳̰̹͕̕͘ų̴̛̣̘̘͇͆͆͌̐̌͗̃͊̏̔͋͠ȑ̷̡̳̺ ̷̻̈́̏̔̂͒͗͗͋̓̕c̵͚̮̠͍̹̠̲͙̞̱̬̞͜͝r̵̨͈̗̰̞̳̤̰̦͇͎̥̱̮̦͒̅̄͑̕e̷̡͖̲͓̺̳̺̪͚̼͋̌̈́̃͒̏͒͒̐̀͑̎̆͜a̵̛̤̙͚̹̞͇̩̤͚̞ţ̸̛͔̤͖̺̖͇̀̀̇̐͊͑͒̎̎͒̕͜͝o̷̢͓̤̠̓̈̈͆̽̆̓͊͑͘r̸̢̼̈̎̐̒̋̊.̴͇͔̻͕̖̤̥͙̩̟͈̹͙̾ͅ

      There was an inexplicable feeling— he didn't want to leave them. No— not them, but her. The feeling told him to stand by the blonde’s side and protect her for any threat, even if they were in a safe place. [Name] didn’t understand— what threat would he protect her for? Why would he? Frowning, [Name] decided to just ignore these thoughts, not pleased by another weird thing happening to him once more.

”See you around, I guess?” He tilted his head, feeling the urge to leave already. He didn’t like this feeling— something inside his chest revolted, as if it wanted to be freed. Something whispered over his ear, a bodiless voice with no gender nor soul— something and not someone.

”Oh, okay! See you around!” The petite girl gave him a beautiful smile, and if [Name] could guess, it looked like one of his mother’s. The brunette frowned at him, narrowing her eyes and staring over her nose. Seemed she was observing whatever he was trying to hide— [Name] just wanted to flee, and that’s exactly what he did.

Already leaving, he clenched his shirt, frowning. His unnerving feeling didn’t go away— his chest felt like burning, the tip of his fingers shaking; almost feeling as if needles pinch trough his skin. What was that feeling? If [name] could describe it, he didn't feel himself. Or to be more precise, his thoughts and mind didn't feel his'. It was strange— he felt as if those thoughts had been forcibly inserted into his brain by someone else.

"I don't like this. It's scary," he muttered to himself, moving the tips of his fingers in nervousness. "Creepy, creepy, creepy..."

  Ț̵̛̰̥͔̞̪̱̈̔͋̽̈͑̈́͑͝h̸̡̛̤͚͉̞̠̦̠̞̹̥̞̽́͊͒͆̒͒͛̈̈́̚͜͝ḯ̴̥̗͋̋͋̉̃̓̆̃͜ͅs̴̨̳͚̮̯̰̻͈̥̤͈̐̿̃͌̐͘ ̶̻͎͗͌̒̌̎͋͑̊̋͒͠g̶̦̙͇͕̜̤͚̥̥̍̒̾̔̑͗̕͜e̶̫̰̿͋̈́̍̊̒̋͜t̵̨͇͕̯͖̬̮̞̙͔̬̖͖̺̉͒͒̈̑͌̉ͅs̵͖̞̭͇̑̾̃̍̈́͛̚ ̸̢̨̪͓̠̘̻̗̠̙͐͐͆͒̊͌̏͑̇́͋̇̓e̶̡̘͔͙͕̪̳̟̯͙͙̺̦̎̑̋̓͌͋͜v̷̰̫̼͎̝̾̂̊e̷̢̛̟͍̠̗͈̱̺̒̄͒̿͂͗̆͌̇̾͒̌̚͝ͅͅń̵̜̤͓͔̲̽͊̎̈̋̇͒̔ ̶͓̋͌̇͒̉̃͗̈́́͋͠͠͝b̸̛̺͇͖̙̟̹͎̫͔̮͎͉̒ề̶͈̮̱̞̚t̵̮̫͕͒̎̐̄̆̒͋̄̍͜ţ̵̧̢̫̭͓̼͕̲̜̼̪́̔̈́͆͒͐̓͑ę̸̢̯̮̓̇̅ͅr̸̥̰̭͐̏̓̊̂̅̑̐̏̀͒̈́̾͘͠ͅ,̸̡͕̲̱͍̭̩̲͍̯̙̈͂̏̂͠͝ ̵̢̤̳̬̺͙̙̳̣͚̺̟̘̂̆͗͋̇͑̽͌͛̏̈́͂͠ͅ—̵̖̱̪̳̦̅̄̔͠ͅ.̸̟̈́͂̄̓̑̋̃͘̚̚̚

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

"Today's training is simple— as simple for maggots like you. First, you and your team will have to go to point A to B to collect a flag, then C to A again. Teams are already been done, and if I hear you want to switch places I will throw you to the ground and make run laps until you pass out," the taller man watches, "the teams will be maximum of three— a backpack will be given to each member with different utilities. The test should be done in two days or three days, depending on how incapable can you be. Someone has to keep a record of any circumstances going on during your training. Now, we will say the teams, so pay attention— SPRINGER! STOP LOOKING LIKE AN IDIOT AND LISTEN!"

”Jean Kirstein, Eren Jaeger, Thomas Wagner,”

”Fucking hell!” [Name] could hear Jean cursing.

[Name] hides his grin. ”Fucking.”

”Stop!”

”Mikasa Ackerman, Annie Leonhardt, Mina Carolina,”

"Daz —, Marco Bodt, Sasha Blouse,"

”Bertholdt Hoover, Reiner Braun, [Name] Knight,”

[Name] blinked, looking for Bertholdt’s face in the crowd. When he spotted him, he waved enthusiastically with sparks on his eyes. Bertholdt gulped, returning the wave weakly with a nervous smile. The taller boy could notice [Name] seemed... a little eager when they paired up in training. He had deduced it was his height, since [Name] always liked to ask about how he got so tall. It was a weird topic of conversation, but that's how he was— an unpredictable and a bit strange guy. Nevertheless, the tall boy was lucky enough to have Reiner by his side this time.

As the teams were together, the three teammates took their backpacks as they conversed. Bertholdt took a look at the map, analyzing the directions they had to take.

”Looks like we are together this time,” Reiner speaks to him with a grin, “heard you got second place the other time, tho.”

”I think we were lucky,” [name] scratches his neck, “I don’t know how will I go with directions...”

The three of them walk trough the woods, Reiner sparing a glance at the other teams taking other directions. ”We are going to be just fine— leave it to me and we’ll be safe and sound.”

[name] tilts his head, staring at Reiner with fake innocence. ”And if we encounter a bear? Maybe wolves? If it rains?”

”Fortunately, it will rain before any of the others appear.”

”What if... the titans appear? What then?”

Reiner and Bertholdt quickly share a look, before turning to [Name]. The boy’s eyes stare at nothingness for a moment, awkward silence prevailing. Neither of the two say anything— it sounded... almost cryptic, if he was hiding the real meaning of that question. Bertholdt felt a shiver trough his whole spine, creeped out by the tone [name] used. It was quite frightening... how someone so... like him, used such tone at them.

“That’s too dark,” [Name] yawns, breaking the horrible tension as they walked again, “hope we can see a bear. They are cute.”

”You... can say pretty scary things, uh, [Name]?” Reiner laughs nervously, sharing a look with Bertholdt. That was... strange.

”Sometimes we have to imagine every possible outcome, don’t you think? We have to be prepared,” playing with his hair lazily, the boy looks at the sky, “mmmh... the sky... it sounds different.”

”Different...?”

[Name] hums, “raining’s coming, possibly.”

”How can you tell?” Reiner stared at the sky, looking as bright as ever. There was no difference from other days— it had stayed sunny.

[name] shrugs. “Dunno— it’s just sounds different. As if I was hearing... steam.”

”You really are something else,” Reiner laughs, amused by such ability. “How much can you hear anyways? Are you nosy, perhaps?”

”A lot, actually. And no, if I’m not paying attention I don’t understand what others are saying— if the topic takes my attention, then I would know many secrets others have,” [name] answered indifferently, taking a closer look at the map as he rested his head on Bertolt's arm. The taller boy blushed by the proximity, a bit intimidated and uncomfortable by the statement.

The last sentence did sent a shiver down their spine— [Name] could have spoken with such a laid back and careless tone, but the two couldn’t help but feel something personal against those words. Sharing a quick look, Reiner chuckled to lighten his own mood and relax his tensed shoulders.

”Are you willing to blackmail? A such cutie and small kitten like you?” 

“Well, this small kitten made you scream in combat training,” [Name] stuck out his tongue, narrowing his eyes in an offended way. “Blackmailing is bad anyways. I’ve read in novels that’s just the lowest of the low, and it’s such a pitiful tactic to use. So I will never use it. Roderick taught me that," [name] proudly spoke— as if he was telling them the entire truth of the world.

Reiner blinks, “you know, I’ve hearing you say a lot of things you learn on books— isn’t that a bit... unusual to say at our age?”

”Why? Books have a lot of answers I can learn. They speak the truth,” he puffs his chest in pride, “also they never disappoint.”

Reiner stares at him with narrowed eyes, debating what to ask. Should he go deeper or touch the surface...? He was kinda curious of [name]'s mind— he had heard him speak like this before, and his unusual behavior made him conclude something. Nah, let’s go in. “What’s sex?”

Bertolt chokes on his own saliva, calling Reiner’s name in a flustered tone. "R—Reiner! W—What?!"

As the blond expected, [name] said the same exact explanation he spoke to Jean back then. What he noticed was how sure [name] looked, not even embarrassed or unsure about the answer. Bertolt widened his eyes, blinking in amazement.

”...for the walls,” Reiner can’t help but laugh at such childish answer— where the hell was he in class? How could [Name] in this age say something like that? It amused him; even Bertolt averted his blushy face to hide his smile by such answer. It was a funny situation, really.

“Why are you laughing?” Jean didn’t laugh— well, his reaction wasn’t better. [Name] felt personally attacked by such reaction— was he really wrong? And for them laugh at him like that!

”I can’t believe this,” he passed a hand trough his face, “[Name], I’m not going to teach you something like that in a deep explanation. But I will say what you imagine what sex is goes much deeper than that,” even if he could be a horny teenager, no way in hell he could take more advantage than simple kisses [Name] gave him. Even when he looked so cute the other day— if [name] didn't even know what he was doing, then there was no fun in doing it. So that's why you don't fluster! Got you.

”Why won’t you?” [name] frowned, crossing his arms in irritation. 

“Grab a book about the human’s anatomy and then we’ll do the adult talking,” Reiner smirked, walking ahead of him without saying another word. 

As the amnesiac concluded he wasn't going to cooperate, he turned at Bertolt, who blushed like crazy because of the topic. ”Can you tell me why I’m wrong, Bertolt?” [Name] blinked repeatedly, trying his charms to get out an answer out of him.

“I—I will just say you are not entirely wrong, but not right either,” covering his mouth to stop a chuckle, the brunette couldn’t imagine [Name] being this clueless. Sometimes looking so tough, nobody could imagine such ideas from him— hell, he looked terrifying when fighting Reiner, so this situation was hilarious to him.

[Name] pouted, switching his attention to the path ahead. Was he that wrong? But he couldn’t just believe «Amelie’s Crown» lied with what it was... He had put his faith in Amelie! She couldn’t just betray his trust like that! How could you, Amelie?!

”I won’t believe Amelie lied to me...” he spoke to himself, lost in his own world filled with flower fields and frogs. His depressing aura was noticed clearly, confusing his two companions.

”Uh... you okay?”

[Name] huffed, irritated, "anyways," he turned his head to his companions, "who will take record of our training?"

"Ah! Good memory, [name]!" Reiner clapped his hands, "what do you think Bertolt? I can have the map and you can take record? Whatever you want, man,"

Bertolt timidly nodded, handing him the map. It was a nice change— the brunette didn't feel suitable for commanding directions, so silently taking record of what was going on was ok with him. [name] could just help Reiner in the leadership, but since his behavior went annoyed they weren't that sure anymore. 

Nevertheless, a long day awaited them.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

[Name] nose crinkles, looking at the sky. He stares at the grey clouds, “I already smell the rain. We should find somewhere to stay before we get wet.”

”Can find another way to get you—“

”Don’t finish!!”

Eventually the teenagers found a cave deep in the woods, decently spaced to let them lay down. It was pretty wet— they couldn't find the cave before raining, so they were a bit soaked. At least they found a refugee; being under the rain was dangerous, even more with the chilly air. Reiner had [name]'s headaches in mind— breathing in cold was something bad for the head, and he had noticed [name] like rain, but acknowledged it was dangerous to his health. Both Reiner and Bertholtd could see annoying the headaches got at the point of being pretty mortal when doing training. 

Placing his backpacks on the floor, the soldiers took out what was enough to do their beds and eat their packed food. Thankfully they wore their green caps this time, just because [name] warned them about the weather. Their clothes were not that soaked, so [name] being with them was pure luck. 

”Sasha almost eat my stuff, man. One cannot know with that girl,” Reiner said, taking a bite of his bread. The gluttony girl went for everybody before training— they all knew food was precious this time, but Reiner had remembered the girl stated she was a hunter, so stealing other people's food was... a bit too much.

[Name] took his boots and jacket off, sighing in relief as the tight and wet fabric was off of him. He laid them on the floor, making sure they didn't get stained or ruined. He starts to unbutton his shirt, shaking a little bit because of the cold.

Reiner almost chokes on his food as he sees [name]'s exhibitionism, but coughs casually to stay unbothered. ”Hey, hey— you won’t strip, would you? I mean, I have no complains but Bertolt here will have a heart attack.”

”I’m just going to take this off. They are tight and that irritates me,” he answers, but stops midway to stare at the tall brunette, “didn't think it was death needed," Bertolt blushed, averting his eyes from [name]'s body, noticing the small drops of water falling on his flesh. 

"What is going on with me?!"

”Anyways, I’ve been pretty curious when we fought. You seemed to know what you were doing— who taught you?” Reiner stared at him in interest, remembering his movements back then. He had beat his ass with no much effort; even Annie lost against him. And that, was something amazing and incredible— a stance he never saw before in a fight.

Nobody, he wanted to say. But deep down he knew someone have taught him everything— or at least he could say that from his short memories. “...Someone.” He opted to say, neither a lie nor a truth. Someone had done it, but he didn’t know who. He didn't know when, where— he didn't know anything about how he could fight like that.

”And that someone is?”

[Name] shrugs, taking a bite of his bread. ”Dunno.”

Reiner raised an eyebrow, confused. ”Dunno? You don’t remember or you don’t wanna say?”

Swallowing his food, [name] answered unbothered. ”I don’t remember.”

Reiner frowned, trying to recollect something— he heard something about his situation back then. ”Ah, I remember. Connie had said you hurt your head, right?”

Was everyone this nosy? “Yeah. I don’t know many things about me.”

”Not even where you are from?” Reiner asked, getting more interest by the individual in front of him. 

Where am I from...? “...I’m from Shiganshina. I was raised there,” that was his home, thanks to Beatrice.

The blond raised an eyebrow, perhaps not believing the answer. ”All your childhood?”

”...Part of it.”

He wasn’t going to try and remember. The pain was very well known, making him stay away from even trying or think about it. He was tired of the same fate, and if nothing good came out of it, then it wasn’t something important to do. 

”What do you mean part of it?”

Would he be able to explain? Beatrice had told him to not say the truth about his whereabouts, since it could bring problems. But could he trust in Reiner and Bertolt? The only person he had tell the truth was Jean, and he didn’t say much about it... Well, it wasn’t as if the two companions were some infiltrates of the Military Police, could they? Perhaps answering something small wasn’t dangerous— maybe... they were friends? They were... nice, after all.

“I...” he blinked, “I was from somewhere else.”

The blond hums, interested about the answer. ”Somewhere where?”

He began to feel irritated. "Aren't you noisy?" Reiner seemed too curious about it— or maybe it was just to pass the time. Either way, [name] didn’t like talking about his blurry past. It was a reminder of things that were never returning, and being the center of attention wasn't something he enjoyed either.

The blond laughs awkwardly, rubbing his neck. “Sorry, sorry. It’s just that... you seem mysterious, and that cute face you wear doesn’t help my curiosity from stopping.”

[Name] stays in silence for some time. Now that he thought about it, if he ignored Reiner’s forced flirty behavior, he radiated a... strong, brotherly aura. He had read about human’s auras— some radiated confidence, some others terror, vileness. [name] wondered what kind of aura he had, but the reminder of his situation build that doubtfulness of himself, making him thought about that so called aura being nonexistent for him. “...My past... is foggy.”

”Wait, so you do have memory loss?”

”I guess.”

"How much you can’t remember, then?"

The amnesiac tilts his head, scratching the tip of his fingers gently. "The first thing I remember is about me waking up in a forest, then my mom taking care of me."

That made some sense, at least. "Then... you were raised in Shiganshina but not born there...?" he blinks, "and there’s no recollection of anything about your past... damn, that’s... a little upsetting, but you seem unbothered by it."

"It’s not that I’m not... But trying only hurts me, and the doctor who helped me said if I over-did it, my mind could collapse and I would have serious injuries, so my mom made me stop doing that," he closes his eyes, "well, it isn’t as if I’m missing something— the people who have been around me... have helped me a lot. And if I can’t remember my past, the present is more important."

Reiner smiles. "I’m... glad you are handling it well. You seem to be filled with courage— no one needs to give you the 'you can do it' talk, uh?"

[Name] gently chuckles, amused. That wasn’t true— if it weren’t for Beatrice’s help, he wouldn’t be here right now. Even now, the need of someone helping him to stand on his feet was important. Being truly alone was something scary, and dealing with heavy stuff alone was something [name] wasn’t sure of. "Sometimes. Receiving help... is important."

Reiner hums. Bertolt looks like he wants to say something, and himself decides to spit it out before regretting it. "Why... why do you want to join the Survey Corps? Even with being face to face with them... you want to fight them..."

The amnesiac scratches his neck this time. "That’s because..." don’t. You think giving your trust isn't idiotic, you idiot? But before he could answer, he frowns. His answer isn’t all genuine— the true meaning of joining is hidden, because of someone else shutting his mouth. "I just want to bring my home back. Being trapped and cornered... is unfair."

[Name] can notice how Bertolt shifts uncomfortably with his usual nervous expression. The boy narrows his eyes, and the taller boy can notice being under such scary stare. The unknown voice is right, but [name] doesn’t want to listen. What could they do anyways? They were comrades, and for years they had to gain each other trust. Why would he suspect...? It was... ridiculous— uncalled for.

They were friends.

  V̶͚͚͖͔͚̂̏̉͋̌̑͘ņ̶̱̻̱̝̠̞̣͙̱̿̆̑̓̒͜͠ĕ̴͍͔̺̲̲̝̲̲̣͙͋͐͝ǎ̸̢̡͎̻̖̲̫̜̩͆̕h̶̋̎̽͗̊͐̓͛͂̋͆͜t̷̜̪̳͍̰̞͕̐̑̓̀̽͒͜͝ͅc̷̹̱̤̠̩̭͎͍̹͂̽̄̆̀͊̀̈́̑̋̈́̄́͜͝ ̷̢̣̰̲̦͛̈̇̐̊̾̊̏̎́͠͠ỹ̷̢̧̡͍̣̘̼̪̫͔͖͎̗̙̓̈́͛̾͒͜͝n̴͇̲̪̤͇̼͙͜͜͠͠ą̵̘̳̦̘̙̫̣̘͇̬̤̞͉͜ ̷̡͚̰͎͕̜̤̻̮̼͊̿̀͗͐̿͘͠s̶̡͓̺̜̬̼̪͕͗̈͂̐̉͐̏̏́̀͒â̸̡̛͔̩̥͉̬̺̏̎̈́̊̐͂͌̈̇͌͒͂ͅy̶̡̗͎̱͓̦̫͙͕̺̍̿͒̒̅̕ḣ̵̯̀ḙ̸̢̛̺̝̝̎̆̄͛̾̋͝͝͝ͅh̵̜̩̤͕̖͕̺̔̎͂͌̈́k̵̙̙̻̺̮͇͉̞̋̊͝m̶̧̛̩̞̬̮̰͖̰̞̃̔̐́͋̄̍͂̋̂͒̍̈͜a̷̬̓̐̉̊̇̄̒͂̑͛c̵͙̭̰̞̻̗̯͇̦͒̈́̄̈́͆͜c̴̳̖͂̾͌.̷̤̔̒̈́̇̓͗̎̅̈́̅̅̓͘V̶͚͚͖͔͚̂̏̉͋̌̑͘ņ̶̱̻̱̝̠̞̣͙̱̿̆̑̓̒͜͠ĕ̴͍͔̺̲̲̝̲̲̣͙͋͐͝ǎ̸̢̡͎̻̖̲̫̜̩͆̕h̶̋̎̽͗̊͐̓͛͂̋͆͜t̷̜̪̳͍̰̞͕̐̑̓̀̽͒͜͝ͅc̷̹̱̤̠̩̭͎͍̹͂̽̄̆̀͊̀̈́̑̋̈́̄́͜͝ ̷̢̣̰̲̦͛̈̇̐̊̾̊̏̎́͠͠ỹ̷̢̧̡͍̣̘̼̪̫͔͖͎̗̙̓̈́͛̾͒͜͝n̴͇̲̪̤͇̼͙͜͜͠͠ą̵̘̳̦̘̙̫̣̘͇̬̤̞͉͜ ̷̡͚̰͎͕̜̤̻̮̼͊̿̀͗͐̿͘͠s̶̡͓̺̜̬̼̪͕͗̈͂̐̉͐̏̏́̀͒â̸̡̛͔̩̥͉̬̺̏̎̈́̊̐͂͌̈̇͌͒͂ͅy̶̡̗͎̱͓̦̫͙͕̺̍̿͒̒̅̕ḣ̵̯̀ḙ̸̢̛̺̝̝̎̆̄͛̾̋͝͝͝ͅh̵̜̩̤͕̖͕̺̔̎͂͌̈́k̵̙̙̻̺̮͇͉̞̋̊͝m̶̧̛̩̞̬̮̰͖̰̞̃̔̐́͋̄̍͂̋̂͒̍̈͜a̷̬̓̐̉̊̇̄̒͂̑͛c̵͙̭̰̞̻̗̯͇̦͒̈́̄̈́͆͜c̴̳̖͂̾͌.̷̤̔̒̈́̇̓͗̎̅̈́̅̅̓͘

  ”U—Uhm, [Name]...?” Bertolt timidly asks, gulping. [name]'s stare was lost— as if he was lost in the wonders of his mind, finally giving in into his wonderland. The taller wondered if the question was wrong to ask— after all, titans were a sensitive subject for some comrades. 

[Name] just blinks, staring at Bertolt. He finally hums, laying on the ground and turning his back on them. “I’m sleepy. Good night.”

”[Name]! But we haven’t finished talking!!” Reiner whines, but there’s no response. It seems [name] fell asleep as soon as his head rested on the ground, or maybe he refused to answer more of the interrogation, “unbelievable. How can you fall asleep so easily? I wanted to ask more...”

After falling in silence, the two remaining look at each other without saying a word. Their connection and bond is already deeply formed, as a look exchange communicate whatever they want to say.

[Name] is someone much different than them— he may appear just like them, but those eyes... those memories he has locked deep inside his wonderland... those actions, defined who he was going to be in the future. What was he going to face along with them— a future no one wanted, but was necessary to happen. Actions nobody wanted, but were destined by fate to get done.

The rain fills the silence, drifting them to sleep.

  T̴͉̤̬̝̃̄̅͐͜͜h̷̡̳̓̓̽e̷̛̛̹͖̜͈͕̾ỹ̸̧̌̔̍͑̅̇̆ ̶̧͍̙̣͚͚̟̙͇͠x̷̡̛͎̓̔̄͑̕͝ͅx̸̧̪̪͉̜̅̊̅̍́̕͜x̷͓̻̬̺̄͆̈́̐ ̸̨͖̝̗͆̾͛̌j̶̢̨̛͈̫͔̞̭͉͐̎̎͂̉̐̈́͋!̴̭̯̐͌#̵̝̫͉͇̰̦͈̝̇ͅ$̶̧̘̠̥̑̍̂̈͝ ̴̫̖̻̦͍͌͘̕c̴̡̬̯̻̦͚̠̯͗̈́̑̽̒́h̶̞͂͐̎̈́̍͠i̴̱͎͈̱̋l̴̯̽̎̉̒̈d̵̻̈́̾̑͛͆͠ŗ̸͔̪̖͒̿͋̊́̇̈́̇ḛ̵̝̪̄͊̐̽̅͊̕n̴̤̰͍̜͓̫͌͂̕ͅ!̷̡͔̍́̽̿͂̈́͌

x̴̡̓̋́̑̔͒̀͘͝x̷̨̹̫̳̗̙͈̠͚̿̏x̶͙̓̚͝͝͠ ̷̬͚͖̒͒̀ṭ̸̨̲̳̤͌͠!̴̻̲̯̠̘̪̩̈́͑̋͘͝͝0̸̧͉̤̞͊̽̈̓́͆̃̌́2̴̛̗͔̰̃̇̎̾̓ ̴̡̨̘̻̭̞̯͕̀̍̈͗͗͌̚͝w̷̫͎̯̫̌́́̃̽̉͒̾͌è̴̘̤͈̫̻͎̄̃ ̴̙̣̙̭̫̄̌̍̈́#̷̡̙̼̈́͆̈́ͅ!̴̡̬̣̜̜͚͐͗̋̍̂0̵̛̯̰̹̰̯̄̏̉̀͝e̴̲̙͒͑́͝ ̵̡̻̘̣̝̙͎̇͐̍́͑͆̓͑͋͜a̴̫͉͉̟̼̮̙̿͐̊ ̸̛̛͙̹̜̳̣͔̝̞͐̽̂͛̽͘͜ć̸̹͇͔̼̜̮̥̤h̴̛̤̄̂ǫ̶̨̼̗̮̔͑̓̉̚ï̷̧̪̹͂c̶̗͆̓͌͑ḛ̴͗̒̐̽͘̕ͅ?̴̥͇̳̘̗̩̲̇̒!̶̲̣̯̰̙̈́̇̋̈́͛

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

“There should be a flag around,” Reiner spoke, looking at both sides. They were already awake and ready for the day— it would be a long one, so they had to be prepared. Waking [name] was the hardest thing in the morning— Bertolt was easy to handle, thankfully. Nevertheless, [name] looked like he was in a deep slumber— an unconscious state that nobody knew how long would he be in if let alone. One of these days it could be a nice experiment to see how much he could sleep.

“You seem well prepared,” [Name] stated, noticing how independent and useful Reiner could be by himself. He seemed capable of doing anything— alone or with someone. It looked like he already went into some training before enlisting.

“What does that mean?” the blond raised an eyebrow, amused by the observation. He knew [name] was someone blunt and spoke his mind, so hearing his thoughts about him interested him.

”I can see you can do anything— are you going to the Military Police?”

”I’m that obvious?” Reiner chuckles.

”Not really. But it looks like you don’t have a hard time with anything, and many others want to get into the top ten,” he tilts his head, "I think everyone want to, so I guessed it..."

”Well, if it’s with you of course I will have a hard time,”

”And with Annie,” Bertolt interjected, holding his laugh.

"And, with Annie," Reiner roll his eyes, "that's my goal for now— just want to be... safe, working with the King. That's all. Hope you don't get bothered like Eren does."

"I don't judge," [name] speaks, "you can do whatever you want— Eren... is an idiot for telling others they are cowards for joining the other branches. Why would you fight something you don't want to? It's your life, so you are the one deciding. Not some ball of anger with spiky hair yelling like a crazy idiot..."

"Damn, that was something," the blond laughs, "ball of anger? haven't heard that before."

"But he's my friend, even when he's wrong sometimes," he looks at the sky, "have to make him don't forget where he is..."

The blond stares at him. The last sentence almost made him laugh— who guided who? He couldn't deny the strange friendship these two had; at first, it seemed as if Eren despised him by the amount of glares he sent to him. Then, something had to happen, since he saw the two sleeping together one night. He didn't strike Eren as someone needy, but Reiner noticed certain actions and expression only appeared when being with [name]. It was as if those actions were only for the privilege of [name]; things as holding hands, stare at his sleeping form, not shouting as loudly as he did... staring at him as if he was the most precious thing in the world... 

Reiner could understand Jean's jealously at Eren, since it was obvious how the horse-face acted around the amnesiac boy. If Reiner was honest, [name] was... someone interesting to be around, and knowing him more was something Reiner wanted to achieve. After all, making him flustered was one of his weird goals too— [name] never flustered, nor looked embarrassed. That, was something Reiner was going to change.

"Ah— I see the flag!" Bertolt interrupts, pointing at his left from behind his two companions. Both of them instantly turn their heads to confirm, and indeed, there was a red flag proudly standing in middle of the forest, intact.

"Good eye, Bert! Almost got away without it," Reiner begins to walk to the direction of the flag, "hope this is over with today! The rain did make me more tired, so—"

As Reiner talked, [name] deeply frowned. Just as that time, he heard something— heavy steps along with grunting. It obviously wasn't a person, so his conclusion was that it was a creature of the forest. Perhaps they went out of bounds here, stepping in a territory they didn't belong. It was far but it was coming closer— [name] stayed frozen as he stared at where he was hearing the thing, while Bertolt, far behind him, looked at him in confusion.

"Hmn...? [name]...?" Bertolt wondered, worried. 

"Wait!" 

[name] eyes widened— it sounded big. As fast and quietly as he could, he ran where Reiner was. “Get down!” He pushed Reiner down with him, both of them harshly falling on the ground. [Name] gritted his teeth as he felt Reiner’s body over him, and the blond shifted his position by placing his two arms at both sides of [Name]. Without [Name] knowing, the blond did have a tint of scarlet on his face. The amnesiac laid on his back, patting a little bit. Reiner averted looking at his exposed neck, trying to think about something else. There was an open area above, in the trees, letting the rays of the sun hit [name]'s body.

”So cute... adorable, even. Is this what a god looks like?”

Thankfully they were in the middle of the woods, where a lot of plants and bushes were a good hide place. [name] aimed to fall into bushes, a decent yet fast place to not get caught. “Don’t move or talk,” he whispered, covering Reiner's mouth with his hand.

This time both of them heard it— heavy steps approaching where the flag was. Time seemed to freeze as a deep grunt was heard, and it's cause came into view. At first glance it could be said it was a bear, but such... dark face and huge body said otherwise. It had black fur, and a red eye— his left eye was scarred, adding more terror into it's appearance. It's face was almost skeletal; long nails, broken horns? no tail... what the hell is that?

Reiner tried to get something out of his backpack— but the minimal movement made the creature alarmed.

The bear? stopped it’s tracks— it seemed it was smelling something. [name] took Reiner's arm tightly, not knowing what else to do. He hoped Bertolt was away from here— he couldn’t hear him anyway.

"We should do something against this bear— how can we get away?" [name] tried to whisper as lowly as he could, not even hearing himself.

“That ain’t a goddamn bear!” Reiner harshly whispered, scared to the bone.

Unfortunately for them, the bear had as excellent hearing as [name]. The creature turned at where they were, grunting lowly as it quickly approached the area.

Oh, FUCK!

”Damn— Run!” [Name] helped Reiner get up and started running. Whatever that thing was was fast and it was just on their toes— none of them dared to turn around to see it’s terrifying stare. The only way they knew that thing was behind was because of it’s grunt sounds— as if someone was breathing right over their ear.

”Any ideas?!” Reiner yelled, not daring to turn around.

”You think I have one?!” There was no plan— the only thing [Name] could think of was running as fast as he could. Good thing to not have their equipment this time around— it could have been a fast way to end this situation, but they had nothing on them that could help. 

“[Name]! If that thing gets to us we are dead!”

”Really?! Is that obvious?!”

”There’s no time for you being sarcastic!”

”Then don’t state the obvious, Reiner!”

They knew running wasn’t going to work forever. Eventually tiredness will overcome them and then they will get in trouble. [Name] had no idea what to do; if they took at least one second to do something else then that thing would get to one of them and surely die by being eaten alive. That didn’t sound pretty at all.

There was no other way— someone had to be the bait.

Reiner gripped his hand, eyeing it cryptically. “Okay, [Name]— I need you to—“

”I will run with it,” [Name] tried to speak between breaks, “I’m faster than you; I will lost it somewhere far away.”

Reiner blinked, dumbfounded. Trying to process such absurd words, the blond’s eye twitched in irritation, desperation and fear: he couldn’t help but scream. ”What the hell are you saying?! You can’t lose this shit anywhere! Look how close it is, for god sake!” The plan sounded stupid and worthless— it didn't solve nothing at all. If only Reiner got alone, then maybe [name] wouldn't get hurt.

”You think I don’t see it?!” The [hair color] haired yelled irritated, taking his backpack and throwing it carelessly to the creature’s head, successfully angering the creature by hearing a grunt, or whatever it was sent to him. “We’ll find each other somehow! Look for Bertolt!”

And with a last look, [Name] changed directions as quick as he could. He ran trough the woods, ignoring Reiner’s yells calling for him in desperation. His mind was going overdrive— he didn’t have a clue on what to exactly do against the scary creature.

Until he didn’t pay attention and his foot step on the weak ground, losing his balance and falling on some cliff. He tried to get a grip on anything, but he only hurt his fingers in the process. Nothing could be done as he fell over a small hill, until some bushes helped his fall at least a little bit. [Name] looked up, meeting the red eye of the creature who stated at him chillingly— the boy couldn’t ignore the chills on his spine, but eventually they broke connection when the thing turned and left, leaving [Name] alone in the forest as if he was unworthy of being eaten by it.

Breathing erratically, [Name] rested his head on the bushes, closing his eyes. “What the... hell...” His whole body hurt— his right foot, his left side (maybe bruised ribs?), his throat burned and he was sure there were many cuts and scratches all around his body. “How... unlucky...”

Laying there, [Name] changed his position to stare at the sky. It was orange, signaling noontime. He didn’t know how much time he was running from the thing, but it felt a good three hours.

He got up, and then he froze as he understood the situation he was in.

There was no backpack; so no supplies.

No map.

No food nor water.

No nothing.

He felt a laugh resonating at the back of his head; making fun of his situation— a laugh sounding so far yet just over his ear, as if someone was just behind him.

He remembered Jean’s words when something didn’t go as planned, or when he was stuck in a shitty situation—

“I’m fucked.”

  Y̴̢̦̫̞̦͔̅̾͋̄͗̊e̸͙̘̭̝̩̦̣͌̆̿̋̾͊̋͌̉͐̕̕͘ş̶̖͕̫̗͙̳͔̥̤̙͖̗̰̫̔͑̄̅̆͂̕̚͝ ̵̲̠̟̦͕̙̥̲̲̥̜̞͊͋̓͋̐̈̂̈̈́̑͋̈̕̕ỵ̶̖͈̱̝̯̳̞͈͍̼̯̟̆̐̄́̎̏ő̸̢̧̟̭͔̮̱͔͖̪̞̙̮̈́̾̚͜ȕ̷͎̤̱̱̬̻͛͂̇̈́̐̈́͝ͅ ̵̢̛̤̹͔̰͙̙͈̰̙̳͎̮̽̈̓͗̔̄̑͘a̴̢̪͍̫̫͔̹̫̱̹̩̓̃̒̊́͋̈͜ŗ̴̬̘̣̬̗̻̩͗̒̊̍͋͐͛̓̈͆̈́͘ͅë̸̛̛̙̥̤̥̯̰͇̬̰̑̓͗̊͐̆̂̋͝.̵͖̰̲͍̲̱̠͙̭͈̒̂̋̋̆͌̓̕

♛