So yes, I do fully react to fictional characters doing dumb things with incredulity and rage and then turn around and encourage myself to place my hands on a burning stove....what are you trying to say?
Good morning to everyone but Wen Chao. He can get his from the Xuanwu tortoise.
Me: I don’t have any seemingly recognizable human emotions that you could pin me under. I’m impenetrable and indecipherable. The ultimate warrior archetype.
Also me: listens to 6lack at 2am imagining a bad breakup and craving a booty call to supress these sudden feelings.
Huh.
Watching big cats meow and purr feels weird because it would be similar to watching mob bosses do the baby voice.
If I had a dollar for everytime Diego said ‘grassy knoll’ or ‘JFK’ this season I could probably raise my own batch of 7 maladjusted super humans with an ape and a robot.
That said, fuck that monocled piece of shit Reggie Hargreeves.
Edit: Just finished watching season 2 and well, I manifested the second batch there didn’t I? Still fuck Reggie.
My sister @ my cat:
“Don’t you have a hobby?”
“Hey....hey.....HEYYYYY.......DIPSHIT”
*Pats the cat aggressively*
“Is she pregnant? She’s fat.”
“Did she eat a dumpster?”
Remember that time in 2012 when we all thought the world was going to end and did some unredeemable embarrassing shit to celebrate the end of times?
Yeah. Same.
Life just makes so much more sense at 3am.
Can’t explain it, it just does.
Maybe I’m sleep deprived but I probably wouldn’t give a shit since my mind is uninhibited like the members of barenaked ladies.
I hate your guts but here’s some chocolate flavored Yoplait to help you through it.
“Hey fuckface, get off my property.”
“Not until you return my limited edition Ben 10 watch with the camo strap.”
“Already sold it, what ya gonna do?”
“Hope you like your phone flushed down the toilet.”
Exit stage right.
I’m right and I should say it
Do I have an exam tomorrow? Yes.
Will I sit down and finish my reading and be proactive and prepare for tomorrow? No.
Or will I ingest toxic amounts of coffee and chocolate and leave the rest up to whichever deity the internet believes in to help me out? Absolutely.