whothisbewp

Latest Posts by whothisbewp

Professions BL has introduced me to over the years:

Engineers

Doctors

C-Suite everything (CEO, CTO, CFO)

Gym Instructors

Vets

Cafe waiters / owners

Millionaire rich kid (daddy’s little boy gets paid a hefty sum every month to ride around in a souped up coupe)

Businessman (shady or legitimate, who cares, look he’s wearing a turtleneck)

Intelligence operatives

Bar tenders

Laundry Operators

Team manager (of what and why exactly? We don’t know, but he manages a team)

Salesperson

Hackers (ethical or redeemable)

Criminal (street and organised)

Creative Director

Painters

Pornographer

Dancer

Loan sharks (probably the only one that caught me off guard)

Lawyer

Dentists (because dentists are not doctors)

Hairdresser

Stewards/pursers

Fashion Designer

Interior designer

Model

Aircraft technicians

Tutor

Deliveryman

Makeup/Skin care promoter (for those brand placements)

Actor (theatre and film)

Artist manager/creative director

Producer

Race car driver (omegaverse included)

Shareholder (it is a career path if you’re rich enough right?)

Bodyguard

Graphic designer

Farmer

Architect

Meteorologist (and a horny one at that, who would’ve thought huh?)

Game Developer

Cultivators

Grim reapers (even a pre-ordained one counts)

Landlord

Political Activists

Athletes

Writers

Ceramic artist

Filmmakers

Videographers

Photographers

Boom operators

Singer

Editor

Manga artist

Ice skater

Producer

Ghost (I don’t know either.)

Project manager

Chef

Kpop idol

Teacher

Influencer

Gamer

Military officer

Supermarket owner

Real estate broker

Medical examiner

Gangster (a constant favorite)

Police officers

and

A two timing snitch (you read that right, there’s always one so it’s gotta be a paying gig.).

It’s a diverse bunch y’all.

If you can guess the bl from these positions, congratulations, you’ve watched all of them probably.

(I ran out of tags by the way)

Private investigator playing for both sides, I disappear people and find missing people. And sometimes for kicks, I’ll just disappear myself.

Your Tumblr username decides your profession. How is your first day at work?

Watching the GameStop meltdown brought out the economics nerd in me that I lost in high school right around when microbiology seemed like the coolest shit around.

Watch me explain how a Reddit forum is saving the economy but also possibly shutting it down. Don’t get me wrong, the bubble will burst at some point soon, I just hope it swings the pendulum against the hedgefucks.

My favourite part about this entire thing is the public realization that Wall Street isn’t as rational or analytical as people thought, there isn’t really a lot of brainpower going into this as they want you to think. It was, is and has always been a dick-measuring contest among those who have money to throw around. If those are the rules, then let everyone play.

If they keep holding, this would be big for retail investors. But also for brokerage firms as the next wave of experimental, hungry and driven individual investors might not be so kind.

Power to the people. Make them bleed green.

Them: Can you check whether this specific transaction would be governed by the donation laws or would it be considered as a loan favourable to our clients?

Me: I’m only on fractions.

That’s it. That’s the joke. Thank you for coming.

Kids are fucking weird dude. A four year old just came into my room to check if I’m working as I said and corrected my pronunciation because she thinks I pronounce ‘girls’ wrong. She then proceeds to just leave with a ‘good night’ and a wave.

It’s 7 pm.

She has done this 5 times in a row now, where she just comes into my room, checks on me and then leaves after a couple of questions.

I think the FBI might be missing their latest recruit.

Life just makes so much more sense at 3am.

Can’t explain it, it just does.

Maybe I’m sleep deprived but I probably wouldn’t give a shit since my mind is uninhibited like the members of barenaked ladies.

Watching those restoration videos on YouTube and commenting hoping that one of those creators will entertain the possibility of restoring the shattered pieces of my sanity back together once this year ends.

Never do I regret my life choices more than when there is an impending exam/deadline on the horizon.

Therapy is nice and all but have you ever made drastic life choices in response to the shit you put yourself through out of sheer procrastination?

Keep hearing about everyone picking up a new skill during the lockdowns and well I’m proud to announce that I can now successfully unravel and re-ravel my self at will.

I’m tired of finding my own way in life, I’d like a glow-in-the-dark map right about now.

If I had a dollar for everytime Diego said ‘grassy knoll’ or ‘JFK’ this season I could probably raise my own batch of 7 maladjusted super humans with an ape and a robot.

That said, fuck that monocled piece of shit Reggie Hargreeves.

Edit: Just finished watching season 2 and well, I manifested the second batch there didn’t I? Still fuck Reggie.

Watching big cats meow and purr feels weird because it would be similar to watching mob bosses do the baby voice.

“Hey fuckface, get off my property.”

“Not until you return my limited edition Ben 10 watch with the camo strap.”

“Already sold it, what ya gonna do?”

“Hope you like your phone flushed down the toilet.”

Exit stage right.

I’m right and I should say it

Wei WuXian: *breathes*

Everyone else (mostly Jiang Cheng): Lord Almighty above, please give me the strength not to roll my eyes and strike this man down.

Wei WuXian:

*Looks for LAN ZHAN all the time in the first life*

*Always chasing after LWJ in the first life*

*Got branded for a dude*

*Always saving and helping LWJ in the first life*

*Seeks him out even after death and reincarnation*

*Constantly giving him ‘eye-fucking invitations’*

I mean he lusts after him worse than any straight couple flirting I’ve seen...it’s a wonder he didn’t make LWJ’s block list.

And LWJ suffers through all of this and more, ever so patient and generous.

I bet if he had a phone, LWJ would be his emergency contact which would of course make JC extra mad.

Even the gods went, you’re not a villainous soul but please go find your man, he’s pining too hard on earth.

Meanwhile, the Untamed:

Two bro’s chilling in a bath tub five feet apart because they’re what? Not Fuckin’ Gay.

Good morning to everyone but Wen Chao. He can get his from the Xuanwu tortoise.

Out of all the things to fast track in life, I went for a mid-life crisis.

My sister just tried to screenshot her favorite kpop star cutout onto a background screen for a game on Twitter for no reason and ended up dialing emergency services.

Consequences.

There are two types of people:

Type A: Life is a mess but every app on the phone is categorized into neat folders and knows exactly which folder to navigate to for an app.

Type B: Got life figured out but the phone is an unholy mess waiting to erupt like a dormant volcano. Knows where to find stuff, but anyone else trying to navigate is just heading towards a level 7 migraine.

Me: I don’t have any seemingly recognizable human emotions that you could pin me under. I’m impenetrable and indecipherable. The ultimate warrior archetype.

Also me: listens to 6lack at 2am imagining a bad breakup and craving a booty call to supress these sudden feelings.

Huh.

Remember that time in 2012 when we all thought the world was going to end and did some unredeemable embarrassing shit to celebrate the end of times?

Yeah. Same.

Did a little soul searching...I am in fact, a narcissistic little shit with no concern for consequences but if someone mentions a cat I will build a shelter with my bare hands and protect it from the elements.

Do I have an exam tomorrow? Yes.

Will I sit down and finish my reading and be proactive and prepare for tomorrow? No.

Or will I ingest toxic amounts of coffee and chocolate and leave the rest up to whichever deity the internet believes in to help me out? Absolutely.

So yes, I do fully react to fictional characters doing dumb things with incredulity and rage and then turn around and encourage myself to place my hands on a burning stove....what are you trying to say?

I run on sex, sleep, chocolate and anger and if that isn’t wholesome I don’t know what is.

I came here for the jokes, I got indoctrinated into a cursed cult instead.

I hate your guts but here’s some chocolate flavored Yoplait to help you through it.

The weirdest thing about online teaching sessions are that the lecturer is explaining this abstract concept that flies by your head while you lie in bed and check the WhatsApp group where everyone is commenting on his drapes/lighting/interior decoration.

Being a hypocrite is really tiring, pretending to care takes a toll on a person.

I’m still the same asshole I was 10 years ago, I’ve just got bills to pay now.